All We Knew
by Butterfly Betty
Summary: Bella Swan returns home after ten years and a bad marriage. Will she be able to find herself? What if her past catches up to her? AH & NC-17 for language and possible lemons. B/E, A/J,R/EM
1. Chapter 1

One

_Focus on the yellow lines, focus on the yellow lines. _I keep running those five little words through my head as my car pushed it's way down the highway. The sun was just starting to set beyond the flat plains that were laid out before me. A tumble weed rolled across the road before getting stuck on the barbwire fence across the way.

The music coming out of the radio was starting to break up so I reached down and hit the scan button on the deck next to the clock that read half past eight. The stations scanned but didn't lock on anything. Sighing, I flicked the radio off, letting the silence fill the car. Now all I had were my thoughts and memories to keep me company. Neither of which were exactly pleasant right now.

Picking up the cold cup of coffee from the cup holder, I grimaced and took a big swig. It tasted like shit but at least it was better than nothing. I replaced the cup and flicked on my headlights as I passed the green sign on the side of the road. Three miles to go till I get to Clarendon, Texas. I shook my head. How desperate I must be to come back to this shit hole of a town after so many years away.

Three minutes later, my car sped past the local junior college that we had jokingly called 'Harvard on the Hill.' I drove through the small town, noticing the new Subway they had added to the Taylor's food mart and the new do it yourself carwash. I turned my car onto the small country road and flipped on my high beams.

A few minutes later, I pulled past the gate that lead to my father's house. I parked my car behind his old, beat up Chevy and cut the engine. The house still looked the same, a little worn around the edges but still just as amazing. I climbed out of the car, grimacing as my body ached from spending the last eighteen plus hours in the car.

The porch light came on just as the front door opened. I could see my father's silhouette in the door way as he reached out and pushed open the screen door.

"You coming in or are you just going to let the mesquites eat you?" he asked, hoarsely.

"I'm coming," I grumbled.

I popped the trunk of my car and pulled out the two suitcases I had stuffed in there. Slamming the trunk, I turned and headed up to the porch. My father, Charlie, stepped back and let me in. He hadn't changed much over the last ten years. Much like the house, he was a little rough around the edges but he still looked amazing. He had dark brown hair that was just starting to turn grey. His most amazing feature were his eyes. They were the color of dark melted chocolate.

"Well, let me look at you," he said, shutting the front door.

Charlie flipped on the light in the entry way and I fought the urge to hide my face. He titled my face up so he could get a better look at the bruising around my eyes, jaw, and mouth. Clenching his jaw tightly, he let go of my face. I automatically ducked my head.

"Yep, he got you pretty good," muttered Charlie.

I wasn't sure what to say to him. What do you tell your father when he just found out that your husband has been beating you for years?

"Have you eaten?" he asked, softly.

"Not hungry," I whispered.

"Not what I asked," said Charlie, titling my face back up to meet his eyes. "When did you last eat?"

"When I left Chicago," I whispered. Charlie sighed and pulled the suitcases from my hands.

"I'll going to put these in your room and then I'll make you a grill cheese and some soup," he muttered.

"I'm not really hungry," I said.

"Still need to eat," he sighed, walking past me.

Charlie headed upstairs to my old bedroom. I just stood there until he came back trotting down the stairs. He headed into the kitchen so I followed him in. I sat down in my old chair while he pulled out the butter and cheese from the fridge. Pulling my knees up to my chest, I laid my head on them while I watched my father make me a grill cheese sandwich and a cup of chicken noodle soup. He placed them in front of me and took the seat across from me. Without saying a word, I picked up my spoon and slowly began eating.

"Has this been going on for a while?" asked Charlie.

"Yes," I whispered, not looking up at him. I focused on the sandwich in front of me.

"How long?" he asked, a moment later.

"A few years," I mumbled.

"Like three?" he asked.

"A few more than that," I whispered, pushing the half eaten food away. I folded my arms and ducked them inside my legs.

"Six years?" he asked. His voice was thick, heavy with emotions.

"Around that," I whispered.

"I see," he murmured, standing up and grabbing the dishes from in front of me.

Charlie didn't say anything as he went over and quickly washed them. I kept my eyes on the floor, my body pulled tightly together. After a moment the water shut off and I heard Charlie sigh.

"Why…" he trailed off. "Why didn't you tell me? Why did you stay?"

"I couldn't tell you," I said, softly. "He would have killed me."

"I would have killed him first," whispered Charlie. I stood up and looked over at my father.

"You weren't there, though," I said.

I turned and walked out of the kitchen, leaving him there staring at me. I made my way upstairs to my old bedroom and shut the door behind me. I slid to the floor as I looked around the room. When I was a teenager, I loved this room. Charlie and I spent two days painting it from the god awful pink that my mother had insisted I have to a dark mauve. Where most teenagers has posters of their favorite rock stars, movie stars, and TV shows on their walls, I had pictures of all the places I wanted to go. Africa, Australia, New Zealand, France, England. The list went on and on. I planned on leaving this town and never looking back. I certainly never planned on coming back here.

It's not that I had any bad feelings about this place. I wasn't the tortured soul who everyone picked on while in school. Quite the opposite, actually. I was the popular girl. The head cheerleader, the homecoming queen, the class valedictorian. I was excepted to leave this place and make something of myself, not become someone's punching bag.

I shook my head as I stood up and made my way over to my bed. I popped open my suitcases and unpacked my clothes, the few things I managed to pack anyway. I stuffed them into the old, oak dresser before heading into the bathroom. I stripped off my clothes and took a look at myself in the mirror.

I wasn't very tall, average height for a woman, I suppose, at five foot five. My skin was so pale it was practically translucent. My eyes were the same color as Charlie's but they don't have the same sparkle, the same light that his do. No, instead they had dark bruises and heavy bags under them. My arms had huge hand prints wrapped around the tops of them. Turning away from the mirror, I started the shower and stepped inside.

I had lived in Clarendon all my life. I was born in Amarillo, the closest hospital, but was brought back to this house just days after I was born. Being a country girl, I spent most days out in the pastures with Charlie, tending to the cattle, making sure they were eating properly. I hated every minute I was out here. I wanted to live in town where I could play with my friends.

My mother, Renee, passed away when I was eight, leaving just me and my father. Charlie did the best he could but he didn't know how to be both my mother and my father. He was so busy splitting his time between the ranch and his position as county sheriff, that there were often days that I barely saw him at all. On those days, I was usually at the home of my best friend, Alice Cullen.

She and her two older brothers, Edward and Emmett, lived in town with their parents Carlisle and Esme. Carlisle was the towns one and only doctor. He had a small clinic opened but often made house calls to some of the older folks who couldn't get out of their houses. Esme was a teacher up at the high school. She taught English Literature and Spanish. Esme and I used to spend hours talking about the greatest books of all time. It pissed Alice off.

Alice was the best friend a girl could ask for. She was furiously protective and loyal but she didn't always have patience for the fact that my interest laid outside of multiple shopping trips, makeovers, and drooling over the latest TV heartthrob. We fought about this quite often but five minutes later, we were usually sitting on the couch while she applied a new facial mask onto me or painted my toe nails the wildest color she could imagine. I had the hardest time telling her no.

Her brothers, Edward and Emmett, thought it was hilarious that Alice pushed me around so much. Edward and Emmett were both older than us. Emmett was three years older and Edward was two. Emmett tried to pull the 'I'm the oldest so I get to kick your ass' spiel around us but both Alice and I knew how to manipulate him. Under it all, he was just a teddy bear.

Edward was the quietest of the three, the more reserved. He usually tried to stop Alice from ripping her oldest brother to shreds while trying to keep Emmett from deserving it. Most of the time, he would be able to calm Alice down but a few times Emmett would say something really stupid and Alice would take him down. As much as the three of them fought, they were closest set of siblings I had ever met.

There wasn't anything they wouldn't do for each other. Emmett and Edward proved that when they came home from school the weekend of our senior prom and kicked David Andrews' ass for standing Alice up. The four of us ended up spending the whole weekend hanging out in front of the TV, stuffing our faces with ice cream, cookies, frosting, and anything else we could do to make Alice feel better. As an only child, I was jealous of the connection that the three of them had.

I finished my shower and dried off. I pulled on the flannel pants and t-shirt before I headed back out into my room. Charlie was sitting on my bed, elbows on his knees, hands clenched together. I stopped in the doorway, not sure what to do. He looked up at me and frowned.

"You know I would have been there, right?" he asked. "If I had known that he was… I would have been on the first flight out."

"I know," I muttered, looking at my feet.

"Well, all that matters is that you are here now," said Charlie, standing up. He came over and kissed the top of my head. "I'm glad you are finally home, Bells."

"Me too, Daddy," I whispered, letting a tear slip down my face.

"Get some sleep," he said, walking out of my room. "You look like shit."

I chuckled softly. Same old Charlie Swan. He shut the door behind him and I crawled onto my bed, flipping the lamp off. The only light coming into the large room was the light from the moon that flittered through the window. There were no sounds of cars driving down the street, the train coming by all night. There was nothing but the sound of peaceful bliss. I hated it already.


	2. Chapter 2

Two

I woke up the next morning when a ray of sunlight struck me in the eye. I groaned and pulled the blanket up over my head. I wasn't ready to get up. I certainly wasn't ready to see the sun out mocking me with it's bright, shiny fun. I heard the door to my room open and I peeked over the top of the blanket to see Charlie leaning against the door frame. He was already quite filthy from a days work.

"Are you planning on sleeping all day?" he asked, cocking his eyebrow at me.

"Thinking about it," I said, pulling the blanket back up.

"Well, too damn bad," he laughed, yanking the blanket off of me. "You are going to go see Carlisle today."

"Don't want to," I muttered.

"Don't really care," said Charlie, sitting on the side of my bed. "I need to know that you are really ok."

"I'm fine, Dad," I whispered.

"No offense, Honey, but you've been lying about that son of a bitch for six years," said Charlie, standing up. "I want Carlisle to check you."

"Fine," I muttered.

Charlie didn't say anything else as he left my room, shutting the door behind him. I laid there for a couple more minutes before I climbed out of the bed and, reluctantly, got dressed. I pulled on a pair of jeans and an old t-shirt of Charlie's. It was the only shirt I had managed to save from the hands of my husband. I slipped on my flip flops, gathered my purse, and headed downstairs. Charlie was sitting in the kitchen drinking a cup of coffee.

"You want me to go with you?" he asked.

"No," I mumbled, walking out of the house.

The last thing I needed was for Charlie to be there holding my hand like I was four years old and not twenty-eight. I pulled on my sunglasses and climbed behind the wheel of my car. I backed up and headed back into town.

A few minutes later, I pulled my car up in front of the small brick building. I sat there for a few minutes trying to get the courage to go inside. Closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, I cut the engine on my car and headed inside. There wasn't anyone in the waiting room as I made my way up to the front desk.

"May I help you?" asked the woman sitting behind the desk. She looked up at me and tried her hardest to stifle her gasp but didn't quite manage it. "Bella Swan?"

"Hello, Mrs. Cope," I smiled. "Does he have a few minutes for me?"

"Of course he does," said Mrs. Cope, reaching out to pat my hand. I resisted the urge to pull away from her. "Take a seat and I will go get him."

I simply nodded my head and went over to sit in the waiting room. I had just sat down when a girl, no older than nineteen came in, totting a baby carrier on one arm and a diaper bag on the other. She set the carrier down on the floor while she spoke to Mrs. Cope. I tried not to look, I really tried not to look, but I couldn't help but look down at the baby nestled inside the seat. The baby, clearly a girl, was fast asleep. She was surrounded by the pink blanket her mother had wrapped around her. I let a tear slip down my face as the girl picked up the carrier and came over and sat down across from me. Sighing, she rolled her neck.

"Long night?" I asked.

"Yes," said the girl, glancing down at her sleeping baby. "She was up all night. I think she has an ear infection."

"That must be very difficult," I murmured, watching as she lifted the infant out of her seat.

"It was but hopefully Dr. Cullen will be able to help her," said the girl, smiling as she looked up at me for the first time. Her smile faltered slightly before she looked back down at her baby.

"Amanda, you ready?" asked Carlisle, opening the door to the back.

"Yes," muttered Amanda, standing up and grabbing the diaper back and carrier in her free arm. She headed over and walked past Carlisle into the back.

"You can go wait in my office, if you want, Bella," smiled Carlisle. "I should only be a few minutes."

"Ok," I whispered.

I made my way back to his office and shut the door behind me. I took a deep breath and looked around. Carlisle's walls were covered with family photos. I shook my head as I went over and looked them over. I was in half of these photos. He and Esme insisted that I was just as much theirs as Alice, Edward, and Emmett were. I smiled to myself as I lifted my favorite picture off the wall.

In the picture Emmett, Edward, Alice, and I were laying in the front yard of Carlisle and Esme's house. We were covered in a huge pile of leaves. It was the first thanksgiving after my mother died and I wasn't in a good mood. Alice, tired of me being grumpy, ordered Emmett and Edward to take me out to the yard and throw me in the leaves. They, of course, felt they had to do it so Edward grabbed my arms and Emmett grabbed my legs. They carried me out to the leaves and tossed me in. Alice jumped in next to me followed by the boys. I couldn't help but laugh as we played in the leaves. I remember Charlie watching us from the doorway, smile on his face.

"That's my favorite picture, too," said Carlisle. I wiped the tears I hadn't realized were falling off my face and placed the picture back onto the wall. I turned and saw him leaning against the door frame to his office. "Do we need to take this to an examination room?"

"No," I said, sitting in one of his seats. Carlisle shut the door behind him and moved to the chair behind his desk. "How's the baby?"

"Fine," said Carlisle. "Ear infection."

"Oh," I whispered, looking out the window to my left.

"So Charlie's worried about you," said Carlisle.

"I know," I sighed, shaking my head. "But I'm fine."

"The bruising on your face does not indicate that you are fine, Bella."

"Suppose," I shrugged. I pulled my knees up to my chest, wrapping my arms around them.

"What happened this last time?" asked Carlisle, moving around the desk and sitting next to me.

"Does it matter," I muttered, shaking my head.

"Yes," said Carlisle, tilting my face up so he could check my bruises. "You're going to be ok. I don't think you broke anything. This time at least."

"I know," I whispered, pulling my face out of his hands. "I was checked out in the ER after…"

"Hmm, how many trips to the ER have you taken?" he asked, standing up. There was an undertone in his voice that clearly told me he was just as upset with me as Charlie was.

"I don't know," I muttered, looking at the floor.

Carlisle sat down in his chair but didn't say anything to me. I kept my eyes locked on the floor. Seeing the disappointed look in Charlie's face had been hard enough. I didn't need to see it in Carlisle's face too. I knew I had let them all down.

"Are you planning on staying in town for a while?" asked Carlisle, several minutes later.

"Guess so," I murmured. "Don't really have anywhere else to go."

"Will you come to dinner tonight?" asked Carlisle. I looked up at him. "Esme would love to see you."

"I…" I trailed off, shaking my head. "I'm not ready to face her yet."

"She's not going to blame you, Sweetheart," said Carlisle, leaning up. I stood up and shook my head again.

"I can't. Not yet, anyway," I whispered. "Thanks, though."

"Ok," he said, standing up. "If you are sure."

"I am," I said, looking up at him. "Do they know I'm back?"

"Yes," said Carlisle. I closed my eyes and looked at the floor. "I'm sorry."

"Me too," I murmured.

I turned and walked out of his office, bypassing Mrs. Cope. I headed out to my car and climbed into. I saw Carlisle watching me as I pulled my car out of the parking lot and back onto the road. Instead of driving through town, I turned and headed out to the cemetery. It had been way too long since I visited my mother. I parked my car and climbed out.

Slowly, I made my way over to her resting place and sat down on the ground. Pulling my knees up to my chest, I ran my fingers of the engraved letters: Renee Swan, Loving wife, devoted mother, best friend. My tears fell freely down my face as I traced each and every letter.

"I've really fucked up, Mom," I whispered, laying my head on my knees. "I don't know what to do anymore, you know. It used to be so clear. I was going to make my mark on the word but instead I've wasted away to nothing. How did I end up here?"

"Talking to dead people," said Alice, from behind me. I didn't bother looking back at her. "People are bound to talk, you know."

"Wouldn't be the first time," I muttered.

"True," laughed Alice. She moved around and sat in front of me but I still didn't look at her.

"How'd you know I would be here?" I asked.

"Charlie told me you went to see Carlisle. I knew this would be the first place you went," explained Alice. "Are you going to show me the damage?"

"Do I have a choice?" I asked.

"No," said Alice, gently pulling my face around to her. "That son of a bitch."

Alice moved so that she had her arms wrapped around my torso. She laid her head on my shoulder and just held me. I leaned my head against hers, letting my tears fall for the umpteenth time over the last few days. Sighing, Alice lifted her head off my shoulder and looked at me.

"You know what this calls for?" she asked. A small smile playing on her lips.

"I swear if you say make-over, I will cut you," I chuckled.

"No, I was thinking more of a day full of chocolate, ice cream, frosting, and lesbian movies," smiled Alice.

"I get everything but the lesbian movies," I said, looking at her.

"Right now, we are man-haters so we watch gay movies," said Alice, like I was an idiot for not understanding.

"Well, gee, that makes since," I snorted, shaking my head. "But what about that man of yours. We don't hate Jas."

"No, we don't," murmured Alice, "but we can pretend for one day."

"Maybe another time," I whispered, laying my head on my knees. "Not really up for it today."

"You sure?" she asked, pushing a strand of my hair behind my ear.

"Yeah, I'm sure," I said, smiling weakly. "But thanks, anyway."

"I'm just a phone call away," whispered Alice.

"I know," I whispered.

Alice kissed my forehead before she left. I sat there with Renee for nearly an hour before I stood up and headed back out to Charlie's house. He was sitting on the front porch, glass of ice tea in his hand when I pulled up. I climbed out of my car and headed up onto the porch.

"Alice find you?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"Good," he said. "Everything go ok at Carlisle's?"

"Yep," I muttered.

"Good," mumbled Charlie. "You hungry?"

"No," I whispered.

"Ok," sighed Charlie. "If you get hungry, there's some cold cuts in the fridge."

"I'll remember that," I muttered.

I headed into the house and went straight up to my room. I shut the door behind me and laid down on my bed. Maybe it was a mistake coming back here.


	3. Chapter 3

Three

"Get your ass up, Isabella," snapped Charlie, throwing my bedroom door open. I ignored him and pulled the blanket over my head. I wasn't in the mood to get out of bed yet. "I mean it. Get your ass out of that bed. You've been here for a week and all you've done is sleep."

"No," I muttered, clutching the blanket. Charlie gripped the bottom of my bed and pulled the blankets off my bed, tossing them on the floor. "Leave me alone."

"No, I'm not going to let you just lay around here, wallowing away in self-pity," said Charlie, grabbing my arm and dragging me off the bed. I pushed him off of me. He stumbled into the desk behind him.

"GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME!" I screamed. "YOU DON'T GET TO HURT ME ANYMORE!"

I ran out of my room and down the stairs. Throwing the screen door open, I ran outside, jumped off the porch, and climbed into my car. Charlie came running out of the house as I peeled out, leaving a cloud of dust in my wake.

I didn't even think about where I was going as I drove back through town. Turning, I headed out to the lake. I parked in the parking lot and climbed out of the car. Stumbling in the sand, I walked until I hit the shore of the lake. I sat down, pulling my knees up to my chest.

"_You stupid whore," yelled Mike, throwing a plate at me. I cried out as the plate hit my arm. "How hard is it to get dinner on the table?"_

"_I'm sorry," I whispered._

"_You're sorry?" he hissed, grabbing me by the arms and throwing me into the wall. "You are always sorry but you never do it right, do you?"_

"_I will," I said, cringing away from him. "I promise."_

"_Oh, I know," smirked Mike, throwing me on the floor. He pulled his belt out of his pants. "I'm going to make sure you learn to do it right."_

"Bella?" asked Edward.

I jumped to my feet and saw him standing behind me. He still looked the same. A little older but still just as handsome as he always did. He was tall, thin but still very fit. He had wild, unruly auburn hair and the brightest pair of green eyes I had ever seen. He had a frown on his face as he waited for me to say something.

"Bella, are you ok?" he asked. I shook my head and looked back over the water.

"I'm fine," I said. "What are you doing here?"

"Fixing to take my boat out," said Edward. "You want to come out with me."

I looked back at him. He smiled and cocked an eyebrow at me. "Sure, I guess."

Edward ran up to his truck and backed his trailer up until his boat was in the water. I helped him get it off the trailer. He parked his truck up by my car and came back down. He tossed me a life jacket before pulling his own on. I climbed into the boat and settled into my seat. Edward pushed the boat out a little ways before he climbed in and took off. My hair flew out behind me as he sped out into the middle of the lake before cutting the engine. I pulled my knees up to my chest as Edward threw his fishing line out.

"You want to fish?" he asked. "I've gotta an extra pole."

"No," I muttered, shaking my head.

"So what have you been doing since you got back?" he asked.

"Nothing."

"Oh," he said.

For a few minutes neither of us spoke. That was always one of the best things about Edward. He didn't feel the need to force conversation. He was just as comfortable in the silence as I was. Usually Emmett and Alice made enough noise for the two of us. We could just sit there watching them argue. Maybe that is why we always got along so well. He understood me.

"I heard you were getting married," I said, after several minutes.

"Yeah," he sighed. "I was but I'm not now."

"Oh," I mumbled.

"Let's just say that it didn't work out," said Edward, looking over at me. "She felt it was ok to screw around on me."

"Yeah, he did too," I muttered, looking back out at the water. "The lake is getting pretty low."

"Yeah, we haven't really had a lot of rain lately," said Edward. "The winter was mild, which means not a lot of snow. The summer's been hot already."

"I can tell," I said, softly. I looked back over at Edward. He was looking out over the water. "When did you move back here? I thought you were in Dallas or someplace like that."

"Last year," said Edward. "I got a job at the college, teaching math to kids who don't know basic addition."

"Fun," I chuckled, shaking my head.

"Oh, it's a blast," smiled Edward, rolling his eyes. "But at least I get my summers off."

"Yeah, to fish," I snorted. "When did you start fishing? I thought you hated it."

"I do but it's better than staying in town where all the single girls try to get my attention," laughed Edward, looking over at me. "It's creepy."

"I'm sure it is," I smiled, shaking my head.

Edward and I fell into a comfortable silence again. I laid my head on my knees and watched as Edward pulled out a couple of fishes. He would unhook when and tossed them back into the lake. When we were little, Charlie and Carlisle would bring us out here with them. Normally, Edward, Emmett, Alice, and I would stay on the beach with Renee and Esme while our fathers fished. After Renee passed, Charlie stopped coming. I guess it was too hard for him without her here.

"You ready to head back in?" asked Edward, looking back at me.

"Whenever you are," I said, softly.

Edward simply nodded his head and started the boat. A few minutes later he pulled up onto the shore. I jumped out and helped him pulled the boat back up. We got it loaded onto his trailer and he walked me back up to my car.

"If you need someone to talk to, a place to hide out at or anything at all, Bella, just come on by. I'm in the old Burkehead house on Keller street," said Edward, pushing a strand of my hair out of my face. "Anytime, ok?"

"Ok," I whispered. I leaned up and kissed his cheek. "Thank you for taking me out on the lake, Edward."

"You're welcome," smiled Edward.

I climbed into my car and pulled out of my space. From my rear view window, I saw Edward watching me as I drove away. I drove back through town and headed back out to Charlie's house. I pulled my car up behind his truck, groaning when I saw Carlisle and Esme's car. Should have know Charlie would call them.

Shaking my head, I climbed out of my car and headed inside. Charlie, Carlisle, and Esme were sitting in the living room. As soon as I walked in they stopped talking. After a moment of silence, Esme stood up and came over and hugged me. I tensed up but she either didn't notice or pretended not to.

"You look beautiful, Sweetheart," whispered Esme, pulling away from me.

"You're a horrible liar, Esme," I said. "I look like shit."

"Well, I was trying to be nice but you're right. You look like shit," said Esme. "When was the last time you showered?"

"I don't know," I said, shrugging my shoulders. Esme wrapped her arm around my shoulder and pulled me over to the couch, forcing me to sit down next to her.

"Let's talk," she said.

"I don't really want to," I said, glaring at Charlie and Carlisle as they left us alone.

"I don't really give a shit," smiled Esme, her mom smiled. You know the one that says I'm not asking you, I'm telling you. "I know that you are mad at Charlie but you can't sit here and let that bastard win."

"He's already won," I muttered, pulling away from Esme. I moved over and sat in Charlie's recliner.

"No, he hasn't. He can't win unless you let him," said Esme. I closed my eyes and shook my head.

"You have no idea," I whispered.

"You're right, I don't, because you hid it for six years, Isabella," said Esme, heatedly. I looked over at her. She was glaring at me. "How could we have helped you when you chose not to ask us?"

"You don't understand," I said, shaking my head. "I couldn't tell you. He would have killed me."

"He almost did," snapped Esme. I flinched back and turned my face into the cushion on the couch. "I'm sorry, that was uncalled for."

"No, you're right," I cried, softly. "I wish I had been stronger, Esme. I wished every day that I had been stronger, smarter, a better wife…but I wasn't."

"Oh, Bella, you know that you did nothing wrong, don't you?" asked Esme, moving over and sitting on the edge of the chair in front of me. She grabbed my hands in hers. "Sweetheart, you didn't deserve anything that he did to you."

"Yes, I did," I whispered, pulling away and climbing off the chair. "I deserved it all."

I walked out of the living room. Charlie and Carlisle were standing in the hallways, listening to every word we had said. Charlie reached out for me but I shook my head as I walked past him. I ran up the stairs to my room and shut the door behind me. I walked into the bathroom and turned on the shower. I stripped off the pajama pants and t-shirt I had been wearing and climbed into the shower.

"_Bella, what the fuck is this?" snapped Mike, storming into our bedroom. I was sitting on the bed, folding a load of his laundry. He thrust the paper he was holding into my hands. "Two hundred dollars at the grocery store. What the hell did you buy?"_

"_They had roast on sale so I bought a couple," I said. "And they had steaks…"_

_I trailed off as Mike's eyes hardened and he clenched his fist. He didn't say anything as he grabbed me by the hair and threw me onto the floor, knocking all the folded cloths off the bed and onto the floor. Mike threw his fist and hit me in the jaw._

"_You know better than to spend my money like that, you fucking whore," he growled._

"_I'm sorry," I cried, trying to protect myself. _

"_I don't give a shit," growled Mike, dragging me into the bathroom buy my hair. _

_He threw me into the shower and flipped on the hot water. I screamed as the scolding water hit my skin. I tried to get out but Mike held me down as the water burned my skin. _

I shook my head and flipped off the water. I dried off and went back into my room. Pulling on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt, I curled up in the rocking chair in front of my window. The day Mike threw me into the shower, I received second degree burns on my arms and legs. Mike told the doctors as the emergency room that I knocked over a pan of boiling water onto myself while cooking. The doctor bought it, treated my burns, and sent us home. Mike got the greatest pleasures of pressing down on my burns until I screamed for mercy.

"I'm sorry." I turned and saw Charlie leaning against the door frame of my room. "I shouldn't have grabbed you."

"I overreacted," I whispered, wiping the tears off my face.

"I'm worried about you," said Charlie, moving over and sitting on the bed of my bed.

"I'm fine," I said, looking over at him. He snorted and shook his head. "Look, I'm doing the best I can right now."

"I know you are," sighed Charlie. "But you can't just…sit here all day."

"What am I supposed to do, Dad?" I asked. "Go out and work with you? You know I hate that shit."

"Then get a job in town," suggested Charlie.

"Oh, I could get a job at Dairy Queen," I said, rolling my eyes.

"So what do you want to do?" asked Charlie. I laid my head on my knees as I looked over at him.

"I don't know," I said. "I don't know anything right now."

"You need to figure it out," said Charlie, standing up. He came over and kissed the side of my head. "Dinner will be ready in half an hour."

"Ok," I whispered.

Charlie left my room, shutting the door behind him. I looked back out of my window and watched as the sun started setting along the western plain. What was I going to do now?


	4. Chapter 4

Four

"Bella, I need you to run into town and get me some more charcoal from the store," said Charlie, coming into the house. I scowled as I looked back at him.

"Why?" I asked.

"Um, because I don't have enough," he said, rolling his eyes. "Why else would I need more? The Cullens will be here soon and if I don't have the grill going all I'm going to hear from Carlisle is how I did it wrong."

"Fine," I muttered.

I grabbed my purse from the table behind the door and ran out to my car. I climbed in and headed back into town. I had been avoiding going to the grocery store all week. I knew, just as Charlie did, that once the gossip queens that worked there found out about my…return home, that it would be all over town.

I parked my car in the front and chanced a look in the rear view mirror. The bruises on my face were almost gone but if anyone looked close enough, you could still see the last of the yellow-greenish tint. Taking a deep breath, I pulled my sunglasses down over my eyes and headed inside.

Lowe's Family Market, as they called it, was the smallest, yet most expensive grocery store in the area. They jacked up their prices knowing that the people who lived here didn't have any place else to go. The nearest Walmart was an hours drive from here.

I quickly made my way through the store and grabbed the bag of charcoal for Charlie. I got into the only line that was open. There were at least ten people in front of me. The little old lady at the register was counting out pennies like they were going to save her life.

"Having fun?" asked Edward, stepping up behind me. I looked over my shoulder at him. He was holding a jar of mayonnaise and a package of toilet paper.

"A blast," I muttered, dryly. "Still can't come into the store to buy just toilet paper, huh?"

"Nope," smiled Edward. "The one lesson that Esme taught me that actually stuck with me."

"That was always the most ridiculous rule," I snorted, moving as the line shortened slightly.

"I know but once she put it inside my head, I just can't buy toilet paper alone," chuckled Edward, shaking his head. "But at least I don't have to buy Alice's tampons anymore."

"No, she has Jasper for that," I laughed.

"Thank god," chuckled Edward. I rolled my eyes and looked back at him.

"Are you coming to Charlie's?" I asked.

"I've been ordered to be there," said Edward, giving me a look. "Apparently, we are to provide a united front for you."

"Esme or Alice?" I asked.

"Carlisle actually," snorted Edward, shaking his head.

"Figures," I muttered.

The person in front of me finally paid for their basket full of goodies and I set the charcoal down. I looked up at the woman behind the register and just barely managed to stifle my groan. Lauren Mallory, one of the biggest gossips in our class, rang up my purchase and looked up at me. Her eyes went wide and I swear, she nearly sucked all the oxygen out of the building with her gasp.

"Oh my god, Bella," she gushed, reached over the counter to hug me. I shared a look with Edward as I did the awkward one-two-three pat hug. "When did you get into town?"

"Um, a couple weeks ago," I mumbled, feeling the eyes of the other customers behind me and Edward.

"Where's your husband?" she asked, looking around.

"He's still in Chicago," I gritted out. "We, um, are getting divorced."

"Oh, that's too bad," said Lauren, grabbing my hand. I pulled my hand out of her grip and handed her my money. "Are you staying here for awhile?"

"I don't know yet," I said, as she handed me my change.

"Oh, well, let's get together soon, ok?" she asked.

"Sure," I said, planting my fakest smile on my face. I looked back at Edward. "I'll see you later."

Edward frowned and nodded his head. I grabbed my charcoal and practically ran out of the store. I jumped into my car and sped out of the parking lot. That's exactly the kind of shit that I wasn't looking forward to about coming back here. Lauren and I always got along well enough in school but she loved to gossip. I'm sure none of that has changed in the last ten years.

I parked my car behind Charlie's truck and grabbed the charcoal. I headed back around the house and practically threw the bag as hard as I could at my father.

"Here's your fucking charcoal," I snapped.

"Hey, what's wrong?" he asked, creasing his forehead.

"What do you fucking care?" I muttered, turning and going back into the house. I threw my keys and purse onto the table and started to the stairs but Charlie grabbed my arm and spun me back around. "Let go of me."

"What the fuck happened, Bella?" he asked, letting go of my arm.

"What do you think happened?" I asked, a tear slipping down my face. I wiped it away angrily. "I ran into Lauren Mallory, who works there. She was all 'Where's your husband.' How the hell was I supposed to stand there in the store and tell her that I had to leave my piece of shit husband after he tried to kill me?"

"I'm sorry. I didn't think about her working there," sighed Charlie, closing his eyes. "I should have just gone myself."

"I don't blame you, Dad," I muttered. "I just…she's going to tell everyone that I'm back."

"Why is that such a bad thing?" asked Charlie. I shook my head as I headed up the stairs.

"Because I wasn't suppose to come back," I said.

I shut the door to my room and laid down on my bed. When I was granted my scholarship to Duke University, everyone was so proud of me. I was the first person from our small town to get a full ride to such a big school. All my teachers wrote in my senior year book about how I was going to do great things.

I didn't really care about doing great things. I just wanted to make my mark. My plan was simple. I would graduate with my degree in English Literature, get my masters, then teach while I wrote the great American novel. I would become the next…whoever was famous nowadays. Where am I now? I am back in this town, hiding in my bedroom because I'm ashamed to face the world.

I heard a car pull up outside. I climbed off my bed and looked out as Carlisle and Esme climbed out. Charlie went out and started gesturing with his hands. Carlisle and Esme both frowned as they nodded their heads. They looked right up at my window. I tried to duck out of the way, but I'm pretty sure they saw me.

Sighing, I took a deep breath and headed downstairs. I stepped off the last step as they and Charlie came into the house. I could see the disappointment etched on all three of their faces. I shifted my eyes away as I went into the kitchen. I pulled the watermelon out of the fridge and began cutting it.

"So I heard you had a run in with Lauren Mallory," commented Esme.

"So I see Charlie gossips just as much as she does," I said, not looking back at her. "Yes, I did. No, it wasn't pleasant. No, I don't want to talk about it so please do me a favor and just stop."

"Bella…" trailed off Esme as the front door got thrown open.

"Honey, I'm home," squealed Alice.

I planted a smile on my face as I turned and greeted my best friend. Alice was wearing a pair of khaki shorts and a white tank top that showed off her tan. Her long black hair was pulled up in a ponytail. She looked beautiful. She thrust the bowl in her hands into mine. The tall blond haired, blue eyed man behind her laughed as he came over and hugged me.

"Hey, Bells," smiled Jasper, kissing my cheek. "She's excited."

"Gee, I can't tell," I snorted. Jasper laughed as he headed outside to join my father.

"I made my famous potato salad," she giggled.

"You bought this at the store and just switched bowls, didn't you?" I asked, cocking my eyebrow at her.

"So funny, Bella, but no," scoffed Alice. "I actually made it."

"It won't kill us?" I asked, tentatively.

"No," snorted Alice. I cocked my eyebrow at her again. "Ok, I'm pretty sure it won't."

"Well, I guess we'll take our chances," I smiled at my best friend. From the corner of my eye I saw Esme leave the room.

"So are you still being a bitch to everyone?" asked Alice as soon as Esme was out of the room.

"Yes," I said, simply, shoving the bowl into the fridge. I turned back and looked at Alice.

"You are coming to work for me starting Monday morning," said Alice.

"I don't want to," I disagreed.

"I don't really give a shit," she smiled. "I need help at the shop and you can't keep sitting here letting your father drive you crazy."

"You know, Alice," I snapped, tossing my dish towel on the counter. "I'm getting really fucking tired of people telling me what to do."

I pushed past her and headed outside. Charlie, Carlisle, Esme, Edward, Emmett, and Jasper, were all sitting around the grill in their camp chairs. All of them stopped talking as they looked up at me. Charlie gestured to the chair next to him but I just shook my head and headed around to the other side of the house. I sat down on the small swing that was hanging from the tree. Charlie put the swing up for me when I was six. He used to spend hours out here pushing me back and forth.

"Need a push?" asked Edward, coming up behind me.

"Yes," I said. I felt Edward place his hands on the small of my back and gently push me out. "Is everyone just completely pissed with me?"

"Not everyone," said Edward, pushing me again. "I'm not."

"Why aren't you?" I asked. "I've fucked everything up."

"Bella, you haven't done anything," said Edward, pulling my swing to a stop. He moved so that he was kneeling in front of me. "Everything that happened to you was because he was an asshole. You did nothing."

"You don't understand, Edward," I whispered as a tear slipped down my face.

"I know I don't," he whispered, wiping my tear away. "They are just worried about you."

"I know," I murmured.

"It's going to be ok, Bella," smiled Edward, kissing the top of my head.

Edward headed back around the house. I sat on the swing for a little while longer before I, reluctantly, headed over to where they were all sitting. They pretended not to notice it as I slid into the chair next to Charlie, knees pulled up to my chest.

"We've gotten that new shipment of parts in down at the garage," said Emmett. "So I should have the truck ready in the morning, Charlie."

"Thanks, Emmett. Appreciate it," said Charlie, standing up. He patted me on the shoulder before checking on the grill.

"The garage is still doing good, Em?" I asked.

"Can't complain," smiled Emmett, winking at me. "Keeps food on the table, roof over my head."

"That's important," I agreed, wrapping my arms around my legs. "You still single?"

"Yep," he smirked proudly. "No woman has been able to tame this."

"No woman would want to," scoffed Alice. "You, my brother, are a player."

"No, I'm not," said Emmett, defending himself. "I'm just…selective."

"Selective is just another name for whore," sang Alice. I closed my eyes and tried to fight the tears that sprang up in my eyes.

"Alice," scolded Esme, shaking her head.

"Oh, Mom, get over it already," mumbled Alice. "It's not like it's my fault your fault your son is a man-whore."

"I'm just going to go…"

I trailed off as I jumped out of my chair and practically ran inside. I tried to calm down as I started pulling stuff out of the refrigerator but my hands were shaking so bad that as Alice came into the house after me, I dropped her bowl of potato salad. The bowl hit the floor with a loud thud and split down the middle.

"_Get me another beer," ordered Mike. _

_I sighed inwardly as I headed into the kitchen. I grabbed the beer our of the fridge and shut the door. My toe snagged on the rug in front of fridge and I stumbled, dropping the beer. It hit the floor with a loud clang as it busted open. I froze as Mike came running into the kitchen. He was livid as he looked from the mess on the floor to me._

"_Why can't you do anything right?" bellowed Mike, throwing me on the floor. The glass laying in the middle of the floor but into my arm. "You are so fucking useless."_

"_It was an accident," I cried, trying to scramble up to my feet._

"_CLEAN IT UP," yelled Mike, kicking me in my stomach. _

_I gasped for air as I pulled the towel off the counter and started cleaning up the mess. Mike stood there, leaning against the wall until I had it all cleaned up. I looked up at him once I was done. He smiled before he headed back into the living room. _

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," I muttered, dropping to my knees and began to scoop up the spill with my bare hands.

"It's ok, Bella," said Alice, grabbing my arm to pull me back up.

"IT'S NOT OK!" I screamed, pushing her off of me. "I'M SO FUCKING STUPID. I'M SO FUCKING CLUMSY."

"Bella, calm down," ordered Charlie, wrapping his arms around me as I tried to clean up the mess.

"I'm sorry," I cried, clinging onto him. "I'll do better. I'm sorry."

"It's ok, sweetheart," whispered Charlie, rocking me back and forth.

"I don't mean to be so clumsy," I whispered. "I'm sorry."

Charlie didn't say anything as he rocked me back and forth in his arms. He held me tight in his arms until I drifted off to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

Five

I woke up the next morning and slowly climbed out of the bed. I went over to the window and saw Charlie working on one of the fences. He looked so tired, so worn out. Guilt washed over me as I turned away from the window. I knew I wasn't helping at all.

I changed out of my clothes from yesterday and headed downstairs to the kitchen. I stood in the doorway for a minute and looked around. They had cleaned, practically scrubbed, the kitchen last night. I doubt it's ever been this clean. Turning away from the kitchen, I headed into the living room and pulled one of our old photo albums off the bookshelf.

I settled on the floor in front of the couch with the album opened on my knees. I ran my fingers over a picture of me and Renee. She had always been so incredibly beautiful, long silky light brown hair, big blue eyes. She always had a huge smile on her face. In the picture, we were standing in front of our Christmas tree. I was maybe four or five years old. I had my arms wrapped around a Raggedy Ann doll. I loved that doll. I slept with her every night until I was eight.

I turned to the next picture. It was of me and Charlie. We were sitting on his horse, Chestnut, while we rode through main street during the fourth of July parade. Charlie had me in front of him and I was waving at everyone. I loved riding with him. I always felt so safe, so loved with him.

There were pictures from my birthday parties, thanksgivings, school parties. The vacations we took to the Colorado mountains. I could feel the tears filling my eyes and spilling over but I couldn't seem to find the will to wipe them away.

"What are you looking at?" asked Charlie.

"Just some pictures," I said, closing the album. I stood up and placed it back on the shelf. "I'll make us some lunch."

"I was thinking we could go into town and grab a bite to eat," suggested Charlie. "You haven't been to Nuttin Fancy yet. It's pretty good."

"I don't know," I muttered, warily.

"Oh come on, Bells," said Charlie, nearly pleading with me. "I'll buy you a slice of pie."

"I guess," I whispered.

"Ok, just let me wash up real quick," smiled Charlie.

Charlie came back downstairs a few minutes later, wearing a clean shirt and a huge smile. I tried to smile back at him but I don't think it came off right. I followed Charlie out of the house and out to his truck. We climbed in and headed back into town.

He pulled up to the small cowboy themed diner a few minutes later. I followed Charlie inside and to a table in the back corner. A moment later, a tall Native American woman smiled and brought us a menu.

"Hey, Charlie, how are you?" asked the woman.

"I'm pretty good, Sue," smiled Charlie. "How are you doing?"

"Not bad," laughed Sue. She looked over at me.

"Oh, Sue Clearwater, I would like you to met my daughter, Bella," said Charlie, smiling at me.

"It's lovely to finally meet you, Bella. Charlie talks about you all the time," smiled Sue. I saw Charlie blush as he looked down at his menu.

"It's nice to meet you, too," I muttered.

"Well, Leah will be with you in just a minute," said Sue, laying her hand on Charlie's shoulder. Charlie definitely blushed this time. Sue left and I slammed my menu on the table as I looked over at Charlie.

"Isn't that just nice," I hissed at him.

"What are you talking about?" he asked as I stood up.

"I'm talking about you and your little girlfriend over there," I said, heatedly. "Was this why you wanted to bring me here? So she could finally meet your screw up of a daughter."

"No, Bella, you are-"

I didn't let him finish as I ran out of the diner. I heard him yelling at me to stop but I ignored him. I ran and ran until I reached Edward's house. Banging on the front door, I dropped to my knees and tried to catch my breath.

"Bella? Oh my god, what's wrong?" asked Edward, pulling his door open.

"Charlie…diner…woman…" was about all I could manage to get out as I gasped for air.

"Ok, calm down," said Edward, lifting me into his arms. He carried me inside, kicking the door shut with his foot. He set me down on the couch and ran into the kitchen. He came back a moment later with a bottle of water. "Here drink this."

"Thanks," I whispered, taking a big drink.

"You're welcome," he said, sitting down next to me. "Are you ok now?"

"No, I think my lungs are going to explode," I chuckled. "I am way out of shape."

"Bella, what happened?" asked Edward, ignoring my attempt at humor.

"Charlie took me to lunch down at the new diner. There was this women, Sue, and she was flirting with Charlie. He was flirting back," I explained.

"Sue Clearwater?" asked Edward, cocking his eyebrow.

"Yes," I muttered.

"Bella, Sue's married," said Edward. I looked up at him. "Her husband, Harry, runs the kitchen part of the diner."

"So?" I asked, darkly. "It's not like she would be the first married person to cheat on their spouse."

"Are you sure you aren't overreacting?" asked Edward.

"No," I snapped, standing up. "You weren't there. You didn't see him with his hands all over her, groping her. You weren't there, Edward."

"Charlie was groping her?" asked Edward, standing up.

"What? No, she was touching him," I said.

"You just said 'you didn't see him with his hands all over her, groping her.' Are you sure you aren't talking about Mike?" asked Edward, quietly.

"I'm…I'm sure," I whispered, sitting back down. "I'm sure."

Edward sat back down next to me but didn't say anything else. I bent over and laid my head on my knees. Was I wrong? Was I projecting my husband issues on my father? I groaned as I sat back on the couch and looked over at Edward. He was watching me with a blank expression on his face.

"I'm an idiot," I said. "I am such a goddamn idiot."

"No, you aren't," said Edward, smiling at me. "After I caught Jessica…Well, let's just say that I was convinced that every woman who claimed to be monogamous was lying, my mother included."

"Esme?" I asked. "Esme would never cheat on Carlisle."

"I know but all I saw was that bitch fucking that asshole in our bed," said Edward. I turned on the couch so that I was facing Edward and pulled my knees up to my chest.

"Did you love her?" I asked.

"I thought I did," said Edward, turning and facing me. He placed his arm on the back of the couch. "When I first met Jessica, she was great. Smart, kind, beautiful. I fell for her pretty hard."

"Do you still love her?" I asked.

"No," muttered Edward. "Things started going downhill before she started fucking around. She wasn't happy that I wasn't going to go to medical school. She just didn't understand that I didn't want to be a doctor. It wasn't my passion."

"Oh," I whispered, laying my head on my knees.

"Do you still love him?" asked Edward, several minutes later.

"No," I whispered. "I stopped loving him a long time ago."

"Let's watch a movie," said Edward, standing up. I looked over at him. He smiled and turned to his movie cabinet. "What sounds good?"

"Nothing romantic," I said.

"Duh," he snorted. "How about Nightmare on Elm Street?"

"The first one?" I asked, smiling.

"Again, duh," he said, looking back at me. "The other's sucked ass."

"They really did," I laughed. "Ok, sounds good. You do have popcorn, don't you?"

"Again, I say duh," chuckled Edward, heading into the kitchen.

He came back a few minutes later with a big bowl of popcorn and two bottles of water. He put the DVD into the player and sat down on the couch next to me. He set the bowl of popcorn in my lap and started the movie. I slid a little closer to him as the opening scene started. Edward slipped his arm around my shoulder, pulling me a little closer to him.

We spent the rest of the afternoon watching movies. After we watched Nightmare on Elm Street, we watched Friday the 13th. It was nice to just spend the day not thinking about the mess that was my life. Not having to deal with the guilt, the shame for one afternoon. But like all good things, eventually I had to return to the real world.

"I guess I should head back to Charlie's," I sighed, pulling the throw off of me and sitting up.

"I'll take you home," said Edward, standing up.

He pulled me to my feet. I followed him outside to a silver Volvo. I laughed as I climbed inside. Edward had had this car for as long as he had a drivers license. I pulled on my seatbelt as he pulled out of the driveway and headed out to Charlie's house. A few minutes later, he pulled up behind my car. He cut the engine and looked over at me.

"It's going to be ok, Bella. I know it doesn't seem like it is, but it will be. In time," said Edward.

"How can you know you that?" I asked, looking over at him.

"I just do," he smiled.

"I hope so," I murmured, undoing my seatbelt. I pushed my door open as I looked back at him. "Thanks for just… you know, being there."

"Anytime," said Edward, smiling at me.

I climbed out of the car and shut the door behind me. Slowly, I made my way up to the porch and inside the house. Charlie was sitting in the kitchen with the phone laying in the middle of the table. He looked up at me as I came in. For a moment we just stared at each other.

"Sit down," said Charlie, calmly. A little too calmly. I slid into the chair across from him. "Do you have any idea just how worried I've been all day?"

"No," I whispered.

"You just…" he shook his head. "I'm trying to be patient here, Bella. I really am but when you just… I don't know what to do. I don't know how to help you."

"I don't either," I whispered, pulling my knees up to my chest. "I, um, was wrong for what I said."

"Yes, you were," muttered Charlie, standing up. He went over to the sink and filled himself a glass of water. He drank it before he turned and looked at me. "I can't believe you would think that I would…"

"Mike cheated on me all the time," I whispered, keeping my eyes on the table in front of me. My eyes were filled with traitorous tears. "He wouldn't care if I was sitting right next to him while he flirted with our waitress or…"

"I'm nothing like that son of a bitch," whispered Charlie.

"I know," I cried, wrapping my arms around my legs. "I know that, Daddy, but I…"

"Bella, you have to find someone to talk to," said Charlie. I snapped my head up at him. "Honey, you have to start dealing with this if you are ever going to be happy again."

"I can't," I said, wiping my tears off my face.

"Bella, you have to," argued Charlie, sitting back down. "You are wound so tight that one of these days, you are going to explode. Honey, please, you have to do this."

"I can't talk about what he did to me," I whispered, shaking my head.

"You can't keep pretending that it didn't happen," said Charlie. He reached over for my hand but I pulled it away. "Just think about it, ok?"

"Ok, I'll think about it," I agreed.

"Did you eat dinner?" asked Charlie.

"No, I had some popcorn at Edward's," I said, softly. Charlie nodded his head before he stood up. He went over to the fridge and pulled out a package of hotdogs. He looked back at me.

"Still like them burnt?" he asked.

"Yes," I smiled softly.

"Me too," said Charlie, smiling.

I followed him outside and sat in one of the lawn chairs while he started the grill. Half an hour later, we were getting our burnt hotdogs and fighting off the mosquitoes. Once we were done eating, we headed back inside and settled down on the couch where we spent the rest of the evening watching college baseball. As I climbed into my bed, I thought about Charlie's words. Maybe I should find someone to talk to but what if once they knew everything, they blamed me too?


	6. Chapter 6

Six

Over the next couple of weeks I fell into a pretty standard routine. I got up, cleaned house, ignored my father's pleas for me to find someone to talk to, got fed up with said pleas and went to Edward's house. That's pretty much how I spent every day of the last two weeks. It's not that I was mad at Charlie for pushing me to get help. Hell, I knew he was right but it wasn't easy to even think about talking to someone about…everything. I knew Charlie was just worried about me. I heard him crying more than once in his room about not being able to help me but the trouble was I didn't know how to help me. How could I tell him how to?

The only small amount of comfort I had right now was the time I spent with Edward. He didn't push for details. He didn't even push me to talk to him. We spent a couple more days out on the lake, a few more days just sitting on his front porch reading. The only thing he did encourage me to do was for me to start writing again.

I had given up any hope of ever writing again after I married Mike but Edward encouraged me to try, even if what I was writing was fan fiction for this vampire book I had read. Hey, at least it was writing, right?

"What are you thinking about?" asked Edward. I looked over at him. We were laying on his couch. He had his feet up by my head and mine were by his head as we read.

"Nothing," I shrugged.

"Well, you haven't turned a page in your book in like five minutes," chuckled Edward. "Did you forget how to read again?"

"Shut up, smartass," I laughed, kicking him with my feet.

"Fuck, stop it," he laughed, grabbing my feet. He started tickling my feet and I went a little crazy trying to get away from him.

"STOP IT," I screamed, falling off the couch and crawling away. I was laughing so hard I had tears building up in my eyes. "You are such a fucking jerk, Edward."

"I know," he said, smugly. I rolled my eyes as I picked up my book and settled into his recliner. "Aren't you coming back over here?"

"No, I don't trust you now," I smiled. "You'll tickle my feet again."

"No, I won't. I promise," he said, holding up three fingers. "Scouts honor."

"You were never a boy scout," I scoffed.

"True," laughed Edward, climbing off the couch. "I guess that makes you fair game, doesn't it?"

"No," I said, quickly.

Edward smirked as he sprang at me, pinning me to the chair. He started tickling my sides as his house phone started ringing. He groaned and stepped away from me.

"Saved by the phone, Swan," he chuckled. I sighed as I pulled my book back up. "Hello….hey Alice…nothing, why…I don't know…ok, hold on." Edward rolled his eyes and pulled the phone to his chest a he looked over at me. "Alice wants to know if you and I will come to dinner at her house tonight."

"Why?" I asked.

"I'm just going to take a guess and say to eat," smirked Edward. I flipped him off. "That was rude."

"Do I really have a choice about dinner or is this one of those situations where I say no and she forces me to go anyway?" I asked, cocking my eyebrow at him.

"Bella, none of us are going to force you to do anything," said Edward, seriously. "But dinner could be fun. Just us, Alice, Jasper, and Emmett. No annoying parents."

"I guess," I shrugged.

"Ok, Alice, we're in," said Edward. "See you at seven, then…I will…Alice, shut up…whatever."

Edward sighed as he slammed his phone down. Running his fingers through his hair, he turned and headed into the kitchen. I was confused about what Alice could have said that upset him so much. Edward came back into the living room a few minutes later with two cans of Dr. Pepper and a bowl of potato chips.

"Get your ass back over here," said Edward, smiling at me. "I need my footrest."

I didn't say anything as I stood up and went over and laid down on the couch. Edward pulled my feet up onto him as he placed his next to me. He tossed me one of the drinks and set the bowl of chips between us before picking up his book and going back to his reading. I followed his lead and opened my book back up and started reading.

That was pretty much how Edward and I spent the rest of the afternoon, in a peaceful silence. We nibbled on the chips until they were gone and drank our sodas. Every once in a while I would feel him looking at me and I would peek around my book just to see him turning back to his. He had a playful smirk on his face. It was funny because this wasn't the Edward that I remembered from all those years ago but at the same time, I wasn't the same Bella.

Just before seven, Edward and I headed out to his car and made our way to Alice and Jasper's house. Edward parked in the driveway behind Emmett's oversized jeep. I snorted and climbed out of the car. We had barley reached the front door of her house when she threw it open and practically jumped into my arms.

"You're finally here!" she squealed.

"Alice, have you been drinking coffee again?" I asked, hugging her back. "You know what it does to you."

"You are fucking hilarious, Bella," snorted Alice, rolling her eyes. "Well, get your ass in here."

"So bossy," muttered Edward, following me into the house.

Jasper and Emmett were sitting in the living room, drinking a beer while watching ESPN. I smiled at the two of them as I looked around the room. It definitely had that Alice feel to it, that's for sure. The room was decorated with warm, comforting colors. I went over and picked up her and Jasper's wedding picture off the mantel.

"Hard to believe it's been eight years, huh?" asked Alice, looping her arm in with mine.

"Yeah," I whispered. Sighing, I placed the picture back on the mantel. "This is a nice place."

"It's coming together," smiled Alice. "Slowly anyway. We had to completely gut the kitchen and redo everything but it's finally starting to feel like home."

"Well, it certainly looks good," I said, looking around.

"Can I get you something to drink Bella?" asked Jasper, standing up. "Beer, wine…"

"Water," I said, shortly.

"Are you sure?" asked Jasper. "We have wine coolers or we can make you a mixed drink."

"I'm sure, goddamn it," I snapped. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I just don't drink."

"Ok, I didn't mean to push you," muttered Jasper, rushing out of the room. I looked over at Edward before I followed Jasper into the kitchen. He pulled the bottle of water out of the fridge and turned to me. "Oh, here you go."

"Jas, I'm sorry," I said. "I overreacted. It's just…he drank…a lot and I don't…"

"Don't worry about it, Bella," smiled Jasper, handing me the water. "I should have just taken no for your answer."

Jasper headed back into the living room with the others. I took a deep breath as I followed him. Edward was sitting on the couch, scowling at Alice. She had a triumphant smirk on her face that I didn't quite get. Emmett was ignoring the two of them as he watched sports center.

"Now that we are all here, we can eat," squealed Alice.

I rolled my eyes at how perky she was. It was annoying. I saw Edward roll his own eyes as we headed over to the table. Alice and Jasper sat at either ends of the table while Emmett sat on one side and Edward and I sat next to each other side. We quickly filled our plates with the lasagna, salad, and garlic bread that I was pretty sure Jasper made.

"This is good," said Emmett, taking a bit.

"Thank you," smiled Alice. I looked over at her.

"You made this?" I asked, before I took a bite.

"Yes, Bella," snorted Alice. "I can cook, you know."

"Since when?" I asked, cocking my eyebrow at her.

"For a few years now," chuckled Alice. "Jas and I took this cooking class in Amarillo. It was fun and I really started enjoying it. I found this recipe online."

"Hmm, who knew you would ever cook," I laughed, shaking my head. I took a bit of my food. "Huh, it's not too bad."

"Gee, thanks," snorted Alice. "Do you still cook?"

"Yes," I said, looking down at my plate. "Not so much now with Charlie, though."

"Alice, are you still going to have your booth up at the courthouse tomorrow?" asked Edward, changing the subject. I gave him a grateful smile.

"Yes," smiled Alice, looking between me and Edward. I turned back to my food. "My jewelry sells pretty good and it's great publicity for the store. Are you two coming?"

"I am but I don't know about Bella," said Edward.

"I'm not," I muttered, looking over at her.

"Bella, you have to come," whined Alice. "You haven't been in like forever."

"I know that, Alice, but-"

"No, there are no buts," said Alice, interrupting me. "You are going to be there even if I have to drag you down there myself."

"Alice, stop telling her what to do," growled Edward, slamming his fork onto the table. "If she doesn't want to go, she doesn't have to."

"Edward, it's fine," I whispered, laying my hand on his shoulder to get him to calm down. He sighed and looked over at me.

"No, it's not ok," he said. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to do. Alice needs to stop pushing you around."

"I don't push her around," argued Alice. Edward looked over at her.

"Ed-"

"That's all you've ever done," said Edward, interrupting Emmett. "How many times did she tell you that she didn't want to go shopping or have another make-over? Instead of listening to her, you just badgered her until she did what you wanted."

"Both of you stop," snapped Emmett.

"No, I didn't," gasped Alice, ignoring Emmett this time.

"Yes, you did," I said, softly, looking up at her. "But I let you do it because I didn't want to hurt your feeling, Alice. Just another way that I've always been weak, I guess."

"Bella-" started Alice.

I ignored her as I stood up and headed outside. Taking a deep breath, I sat down on the steps of her front porch. Edward was right, she always pushed me around. I just say there and took it because I didn't want to hurt her feelings or lose her as my best friend. I heard the door open behind me but I didn't bother looking back.

"Was I really that bad?" asked Alice, sitting down next to me.

"Sometimes," I said, bringing my knees up. "Most of the time I didn't mind it, Alice, but sometimes I hated it. I would tell you no and you would get this little pout on your lips. I would feel so guilty so I would let you do it."

"God, I must have been such a bitch," muttered Alice, shaking her head.

"No, you weren't," I whispered. "I just didn't want to hurt your feelings, Alice. You're my best friend."

"You still see me as your best friend?" she asked.

"Of course I do," I said, hooking my arm in with hers.

"But you've been spending all your time with Edward," she frowned. "I thought you didn't want to be my friend anymore."

"Edward just understands that I don't want to talk about…" I trailed off.

"I suppose he does," murmured Alice, laying her head on my shoulder. "You don't have to come tomorrow if you don't want to."

"I'll think about it, ok?" I asked. "It's just really hard to be around people right now."

"I know," sighed Alice. "Let's go finish dinner before Emmett eats it all."

"Ok," I laughed, standing up. "Did you really cook?"

"Why is that so hard to believe?" asked Alice, leading me inside the house.

"I don't know," I chuckled. "It just is."

By the time, Edward and I loaded back into his arm so he could take me back to my car, I was stuffed and tired. Alice made us ice cream sundaes for dessert. We ended up in the living room watching re-runs of CSI and laughing at how easy it was to figure out who the bad guys were. Edward pulled his car up into his driveway and we climbed out. He walked me over to my car and leaned against the side.

"So are you coming tomorrow?" he asked. "To the courthouse."

"I don't know," I said. "There's going to be a lot of people there."

"True but you are going to have to face people sometime, Bella," smiled Edward. "Besides, you won't be alone. I'll be there with you."

"Ok, I'll go," I sighed. "Guess it won't be too bad. At least the barbeque is good, right?"

"The best ever," snorted Edward, pushing off my car. He hugged me and kissed my forehead. "Good night, Bella."

"Night, Edward," I whispered.

I kissed Edward's cheek before I climbed into my car and headed back out to Charlie's. I parked my car behind his truck and headed inside. Charlie was laying on the couch fast asleep. I smiled to myself as I turned off the TV and laid a blanket over him. I headed upstairs to my room, changed into my pajamas, and climbed into bed. My thoughts traveled to Edward as I drifted to sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

Seven

I woke up the next morning just as the sun was starting to rise. It was the first peaceful nights sleep I had in…shit, a really long time. I quickly showered, dressed in a pair of black cotton shorts and a red tank top before I made my way downstairs to the kitchen. I pulled out the eggs and bacon out of the fridge and started making breakfast.

"Um, what's this?" asked Charlie. I looked back at him. He was watching me with a small smile on his face.

"I'm making breakfast. Don't make a big deal about it," I said, rolling my eyes as his smile widen. "Get the juice out and start the coffee."

"Yes, ma'am," he chuckled.

I rolled my eyes again as I turned back to the bacon. He was acting like this was the first time I had ever made him breakfast before. I had just taken the last of the bacon off the griddle when the doorbell rang. I heard Charlie get up from the kitchen table and go out to answer it.

"Edward, what are you doing here so early?" asked Charlie.

"Well, I came to pick up Bella, Charlie," laughed Edward. "We are heading down to the courthouse."

Crap, I thought, just what I needed. Charlie was going to make a big deal out this. I just knew it. Charlie and Edward came into the kitchen and I looked back at them. Charlie was smirking as he picked up his coffee cup and looked back at Edward.

"Can I get you a cup?" he asked.

"Sure," said Edward, coming over and standing next to me. "Breakfast smells good."

"There's plenty, if you would like to join us," I offered, smiling at him. Edward smiled as he took the cup of coffee from Charlie.

"Thank you, Charlie," he said, before looking back at me. "I'd love to. Been awhile since I've had a good breakfast."

"Ok, well, you can set the table," I chuckled, gesturing to the cabinet with the plates. "Move it, Mister."

"So bossy," he snorted. I glared at him. "Ok, ok, I'm going."

I laughed as Edward set his coffee on the counter and grabbed three plates from the cabinet. I quickly scrambled us some eggs. I set them on the table next to the bacon and the toast that Charlie had made us. I pulled the salsa out of the fridge and poured myself a cup of orange juice before I settled in the chair in between Charlie and Edward.

"Well, this looks good," said Charlie, filling his plate.

"Thanks," I smiled. I placed some eggs and bacon on my plate before handing them to Edward. I picked up the salsa and opened the jar.

"Ugh, please tell me you don't still eat salsa on your eggs," grimaced Edward. I chuckled as I looked over at him.

"It's the only way to eat eggs, Edward," I said, pouring on a healthy dose of salsa. "It's so good. You should try it."

"Ugh, no, thanks," he grumbled. "It looks nasty."

"Well, it takes delicious." I kept my eyes on his as I scooped up a huge fork full and stuffed it into my mouth. "Yummy."

"Don't talk with your mouth full, Bella," complained Charlie. I looked over at him and opened my mouth, showing him my half chewed food. "Gross."

"Sorry, Dad," I laughed, swallowing the eggs.

"I don't think you are," he chuckled, shaking his head.

"I don't think she is, either," snorted Edward, shaking his head.

"So, um, you two heading down to the courthouse, huh?" asked Charlie, looking right at me. "That should be fun."

"I guess," I said, shrugging my shoulders. "Are you going?"

"Yep," said Charlie. "I'm cooking the briskets."

"Damn it," I muttered. "I really hoping to eat today."

"What's that supposed to me?" asked Charlie. I snorted and looked up at him. "My cooking is not that bad."

"Of course it's not," I reassured him. "It's just…briskets are not easy to make."

"I'll have you know that I've cooked the briskets for the last three years," gloated Charlie. "And nobody has gotten sick. Right, Edward?"

"He's right, Bella," nodded Edward.

"Hmm, first Alice cooks and now you," I mused, shaking my head. "I think I am in the twilight zone."

"Shut up and finish eating," laughed Charlie.

Edward and I laughed softly as we finished eating. Charlie insisted that he would do the dishes and pushed us out of the house. I rolled my eyes as I followed Edward over to his car and climbed in. He was still laughing as he climbed into the drivers seat. He started the car and took off into town. A few minutes later, he parked the car about a block away from the courthouse square.

"Looks like a big crowd," I said, softly.

"Last couple years have been pretty big," murmured Edward. "Ever since they redid the courthouse."

"I heard about that," I mumbled. I took a deep breath and looked over at him. He was watching me with a soft smile on his face. "I guess we should go."

"If you're ready," he smiled. Edward and I climbed out of the car and headed to toward the square. "Remember when we were little and we come down here. Our moms would set up their lawn chairs and let us run around here."

"I'm pretty sure they drank the whole time," I said.

"Probably," snorted Edward as we finally reached the courthouse, He looked over at me. "Can you blame them?"

"No," I laughed.

Edward and I slowly made our way through the courthouse square. I had forgotten how many people came out here every year and peddled their shit. There were the usual people who sold cold drinks, homemade ice cream, snow cones, and baked goods. Then there were the people who sold pocket knives, belt buckles, leather purses, and cheap jewelry.

"What to get your face painted?" asked Edward, gesturing to the booth were a woman was painting a crown on a little girls face.

"Um, no thanks," I said, shaking my head. "But you feel free. I bet you would look so cute with a crown on your face."

"I was thinking more of a lion," smirked Edward. I just laughed and shook my head. "No, how about an eagle?"

"Oh, that would be perfect," I cheered.

"Bella?"

I turned and saw Angela Weber and Ben Cheney. Angela was a beautiful girl with long black hair and dark eyes. Ben was about an inch shorter than the woman next to him. He also had black hair and dark eyes. He has his hand linked with hers.

"Hey, Angela, Ben," I said softly. "Long time."

"It's been what almost eight years?" asked Angela, stepping up and hugging me. I looked over at Edward as I hugged her back. She pulled back and looked me over. "You look great."

"Thanks," I mumbled. "You do too. Are you still in Lubbock?"

"No, we're in Dallas now," said Ben, slipping his arm around Angela's waist. "You are looking pretty good, Bella. Seems like Chicago agrees with you."

"Yeah, well, I'm, um, not in Chicago anymore," I muttered, looking at my feet. "I, um, I'm staying here with Charlie for awhile."

"Oh," said Ben, awkwardly. "Well, it was great to see you. We should be going."

"Yeah, you too," I said, trying to smile but I knew it didn't come off right.

"You really do look great," said Angela before she and Ben turned and headed back the opposite direction.

"Well, that…awkward," muttered Edward. I looked over at him. "They didn't even say hi to me. I'm kind of hurt actually."

"I'm sure you'll survive," I laughed, shaking my head. "I suppose I've got to accept that this is just my life for awhile, huh?"

"Yep," smirked Edward. "But it won't be too bad. At least you have me, right?"

"Right," I smiled. I looked around. "You know what? I think I do what to get my face painted."

"Ok," laughed Edward, leading me over to the woman. "What do you want, Swan?"

"A butterfly," I said, smiling at him. "You are getting an eagle."

"Fine," he groaned. "But you are going first."

"Deal," I giggled.

Edward and I took turns getting our faces painted. My butterfly was lavender and baby pink while his eagle was black, white, and silver. He looked like a rock star from the eighties. You know, one of those cheesy rock bands that spent more time in their make-up than on their music. Once we had both gotten our faces painted, we got our barbeque. Surprisingly, the brisket was pretty damn good. Who knew Charlie could cook?

We tossed our plates in the trash and headed over to Alice's booth. She, Jasper, Emmett, Esme, and Carlisle were sitting behind the long tables, fanning themselves. They all looked up at me and Edward and busted out laughing.

"What's so funny?" I asked.

"Have you looked in the mirror, Bella?" asked Emmett. "You look like a butterfly."

"Ain't I pretty?" I asked, batting my lashes at him.

"Not bad," he shrugged.

"She's beautiful," said Edward, winking at me. I smiled and looked away. I noticed everyone looking from me to Edward.

"So, Alice, are you selling a ton of your jewerly?" I asked, trying to take the attention off of me and Edward.

"Not doing too shabby," smiled Alice. "I'll probably end up making a couple hundreds bucks between here and the rodeo tonight."

"You sell this stuff at the rodeo?" I asked.

"Oh, yeah," she said, pulling me into the chair next to her. "They started a craft show out in the old community center year before last."

"Oh," I said. "Interesting."

"Are you coming to the rodeo, Bella?" asked Carlisle. I looked around at him.

"I don't know," I shrugged. "Hadn't thought about it, honestly."

"You should come," smiled Esme, looking from me to Edward. "You are welcome to sit in our box with us. Then maybe stay for the dance."

"Yeah, I don't know about that," I snorted, shaking my head as Carlisle's cell phone rang.

"Hello…yeah, she's right here," said Carlisle, looking over at me. I cocked my eyebrow at him but he shook his head. "Southeast corner near the annex building…ok….ok…will do….ok, Charlie."

"What did Charlie want?" asked Esme.

"He was wondering were we were," said Carlisle, not meeting any of our eyes.

I knew something was up because Carlisle was a shitty liar. I was fixing to call him on it when I heard my name being called. I looked over and gasped as I jumped up, knocking my chair back. My body was shaking and my knees were weak. Edward reached over and hooked his arm through mine.

"Bella, what's wrong?" asked Edward. I couldn't focus on him as I looked at the person with Charlie.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I asked.


	8. Chapter 8

Eight

"What the hell are you doing here?" I asked.

I could feel the panic rising up inside of me as I looked at the district attorney handling the criminal case against my soon to be ex-husband. Rosalie Hale was a beautiful, leggy blond with long silky hair and amazingly deep blue eyes. She had been one of the biggest pushers to get me finally press charges against Mike.

"Did he get off? Is he coming here?" I whispered, eyes filling with tears.

"No, he's still in jail, Bella," said Rose, quickly. I took a shaky breath as the tears in my eyes spilled down my face. "But I need you to come back."

"Why?" I asked, sadly. "You said the evidence spoke for itself. You said…"

"I know but we ran into a problem," explained Rose, coming over and grabbing my hands. "One of the witnesses to the assault was just indicted on several charges of perjury from an old case. This makes him less creditable. Now, we still have the hospital reports and the police reports but I…I need you to testify."

"I can't," I whispered, shaking my head. "Rose…"

"I know, honey," whispered Rose. "But if you don't, I think he will get off."

"But you said I was safe now," I cried. Edward pulled me into his arms and held me as everyone watched me break down.

"I know what I said," muttered Rose.

"I have to leave. I have to go somewhere, anywhere else. He'll find me here," I mumbled, pulling away from Edward. I pushed my way through the others and started walking as quickly as I could away from there.

"Bella, wait," yelled Charlie, grabbing my arm. I turned and pushed him off of me.

"NO!" I screamed. "I CAN'T GET UP THERE AND TELL THEM WHAT HE DID TO ME. I CAN'T DO IT, DADDY. I CAN'T STAY HERE WHERE HE WILL FIND ME."

I turned and ran as fast as I could while everyone in the square stared at me. Pushing myself, I ran faster and faster. Someone grabbed me and I turned around and saw Edward. He didn't say a word as he swept me into his arms and carried me back the other way. I clung to him, burying my face in his shirt as I let my tears fall freely down my face.

Edward carried me back to his car and set me into the passenger seat. He reached over and buckled my seat belt for me before he shut the door. He ran around to the driver's seat and climbed in. He didn't saw a word as he took off down the road. Edward parked his car in his driveway and came around to my side of the car. Lifting me out, he carried me up his front porch and into his house. He laid me on the couch and headed into the bathroom.

Edward came back a few minutes later with a warm washrag. He gently washed the paint off my face along with my tears. I just laid there, unable to speak to him. Once he had cleaned my face, he headed back into the bathroom. He came back out a few minutes later, his own face now paint free. He lifted me off the couch and sat back down with me in this lap. I laid my head on his chest as he wrapped his arms tightly around me.

"I was pregnant," I whispered. "He was ecstatic because we were finally going to have a baby. I foolishly thought that having a baby would change him, I guess. I was around ten weeks when I started having some cramping, then I started bleeding. He was…almost tender with me when he drove me to the emergency room. The doctor told us we had lost the baby. He said I had experienced a blighted ovum and this was my bodies natural defense. Mike was livid. He dragged me out of the hospital and threw me into the car. I knew I was in trouble. I could see the look in his eye, Edward. He was going to kill me."

"You don't have to talk about it," said Edward.

"He didn't even look at me as he drove me home," I continued. "He parked the car in the garage and told me to get my fat ass inside. I didn't say anything as I climbed out of the car and went inside the house. He followed me inside, slamming the door to the garage. He grabbed me by my hair and slammed me against the wall. He accused me of having an abortion and trying to pass it off as a miscarriage. I tried to tell him that I didn't but he hit me and told me to shut up. He threw me on the floor and kicked me. He called me a good for nothing whore. I begged him to stop. I begged him not to hurt me anymore. He said he was done with me."

"Bella, stop," murmured Edward, holding me tighter. I was nearly sobbing by this point but I had to get it out. I had to tell someone and all I had right now was Edward.

"He came down on me and wrapped his hands around my neck. I clawed at his hands. Somehow, I managed to kick him off of me. He fell back against the wall. I scrambled to my feet and ran out of the house. He came running after me, yelling and screaming that I was dead. He tackled me in the middle of the street and hit me again and again and again. He just wouldn't stop. He stood up and he kicked me, he spit on me. Do you know how humiliating it is to be spit on?"

"No," whispered Edward so softly, I barely heard him. He was running his fingers through my hair as he laid his cheek on the top of my head.

"Mike grabbed me by the hair and started dragging me out of the street and back into the house. I knew if he got me inside there, that I was going to die. Our neighbors from across the street came running out of their house. Jacob threw Mike off of me while Leah called the police. Jacob beat the shit out of him. Leah came over and knelt down beside me while one of our other neighbors came out to help restrain Mike. I passed out a few minutes later. When I woke up I was in the hospital. Rose was sitting in the corner of my room. She told me they had arrested Mike for assault and attempted murder. She told me that if I didn't press charges on him that he would end up killing me one day. She promised me that they had enough evidence from the witness statements and hospital reports that I wouldn't have to testify against him but I guess she was wrong."

"But you know you have to, don't you?" asked Edward, rubbing my back.

"Yes," I cried. "But how am I going to sit there and tell everyone how I let him beat me for six years, Edward? I mean, I am so shamed for letting him hurt me."

"You will find the strength to face him because you know you have to," said Edward. I sat up and looked at him. "I know it's hard to face the past, Bella, but you have to do it. It's the only way you will truly be able to move on and heal from this."

"I don't know if I can face him again," I whispered, moving so that I was sitting next to him. "I hate him with every fiber of my being. He took everything away from me."

"No, he took parts of you but, Bella, he didn't take all of you. There is still so much to who you are. You just need help finding it. That's all."

"That easy, huh?" I asked.

"No, it's not easy but if anyone can go through the hell you have and convince me to get my face painted like an eagle, they can do anything," smiled Edward. I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "I'm serious, Bella. You can go back there and face him. You are strong enough."

"Will you come with me?" I asked, looking up at him. "I can't do this on my own, Edward."

"If you want me to, I will go with you, Bella, but I think you should ask Charlie to go too," said Edward. I bit my lip as I looked away. "He's so worried about you, Bella. I think he needs to do this for you."

"What if he hates me once he knows everything?" I whispered, keeping my eyes on the ground. Edward reached over and lifted my face towards his.

"He would never hate you, Bella," said Edward, firmly. "Ever. He loves you more than you probably realize he does."

"Ok," I whispered, through my tears. "I'll talk to him about coming with me."

"Good," smiled Edward, wiping a tear away as it fell down my face. "Now, I should probably take you home before Charlie really freaks out."

"I suppose you're right," I mumbled.

Edward and I stood up and headed back out to his car. A few minutes later, he pulled up in front of Charlie's house. Carlisle and Esme's cars were sitting in the drive along with Alice and Jasper's. I looked over at Edward before I opened the car door and climbed out. Edward and I made our way up the porch and into the house.

Charlie was pacing back and forth while he drummed the phone on the palm of his hand. Carlisle and Esme were standing in front of the large picture window that over looked ranch. Jasper, Alice, Emmett, and Rose were sitting around the living room. None of them were speaking.

However they all looked up at us as we came in. I saw the mixture of anger and concern cross over all of their faces. Charlie went to speak but I held up my hand.

"I'll…"I shook my head and cleared my throat. "I'll go back there. I'll testify but I am not happy about it. I know that you all are…mad at me right now but you don't understand how hard it is to face that monster. How hard it was come back here. I just need you to give me some time to deal with all of this."

"Ok," said Alice, smiling at me. "We'll give you all the time you need."

"Thank you," I whispered. Wiping the fresh tears off my face, I looked over at Rose. "Have you met everyone?"

"Except for Edward," smiled Rose. "But I guess I have now."

"Good," I said. "When do I have to be there?"

"As soon as possible," explained Rose. "The trial starts next week."

"Oh," I whispered. "I…ok."

"I'm sorry, Bella," said Rose. "I wish…"

"I wish a lot of things too," I mumbled. "Dad, can I talk to you in the kitchen?"

Charlie simply nodded and followed me into the kitchen. He sat down at the table while I poured us both a glass of lemonade. I sat down in the chair across from him and took a big drink.

"I'm sorry for pushing you," I said, looking up at him.

"Don't be," he scoffed. "You were scared, I get that."

"Dad, I…." I trailed off. "I don't want to go back there but I don't have a choice in the matter, I guess. I was hoping that maybe, if you could take the time off, that maybe you could…"

"I'll be in the seat next to you, Bells," whispered Charlie, letting a tear slip down his face as he reached over and grabbed my hand. "You and I are in this together, I promise."

"Thank you, Daddy," I cried.

I moved so that I was sitting in his lap. Charlie wrapped his arms around me and just held me as I cried for the umpteenth time today. Eventually, I managed to stop my tears from falling down my face. We headed back into the living room where everyone was talking quietly amongst themselves. Edward looked up at me and cocked his eyebrow, silently asking if I had talked to him about coming with us. I nodded my head at his silent question.

"Well, I need to head back into town and get ready for the rodeo," sighed Alice. She looked over at me. "Are you coming?"

"I don't think so," I said, shaking my head. "I'm not really up to it tonight."

"Ok, I understand," smiled Alice, standing up. She came over and hugged me. "I love you, Bella. It's going to be ok."

"I love you, too, Alice," I whispered.

"Take it easy, Bella," winked Jasper. He leaned down and kissed the top of my head. "Try to anyway."

"I'll try," I murmured. Emmett came over and pulled me into a massive bear hug. "Em…can't…breath."

"I've got your back, Swan," said Emmett, seriously. In fact, I had never seen him this serious. "Do you hear me? I will never let that ass hurt you again."

"I hear you, Emmett," I whispered. I leaned up and kissed his cheek. "Thank you."

Emmett just nodded as he followed Jasper and Alice out of the house. Carlisle and Esme left next followed by Rose, who was staying at the Best Western. Charlie reluctantly left since he was one of the judges for the rodeo tonight. Edward and I ended up spending the rest of the night watching crappy scary movies until we fell sleep on the couch. The last thing I remember was feeling him wrap his arms around me as he held me against his chest.


	9. Chapter 9

Nine

"Bella," whispered Edward, gently shaking my shoulders. "Bella, wake up."

"Mmmm, not ready," I mumbled. I felt Edward chuckle softly from under me. WAIT, UNDER ME? I snapped my eyes open as I jumped up to feet, accidentally kneeing him in the groin.

"Oh, fuck," He groaned, falling off the couch while grabbing himself.

"Oh my god, I am so sorry," I whispered, frantically. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

"I'm fine," he muttered, jaw clenched tight.

"No, you're not," I mumbled, falling to my knees next to him. "God, I just mess everything up."

"Bella, I'm fine," said Edward, taking a deep breath. I cocked an eyebrow at him while motioning to the fact that he was still gripping his manhood through his shorts. "Ok, so I'm almost fine but it's not your fault. I should have been ready for you to wake up, I guess."

"You're being too nice," I muttered, leaning back against the back of the couch. Edward sighed and moved so that he was sitting next to me.

"Bella, you have to accept that I'm not going anywhere," said Edward, grabbing my hand. I looked up at him. "Even if you did knee me in the goods."

"Ok, I guess I can accept that," I smiled, shaking my head. "Why were you waking me up anyway?"

"Cause I needed to pee," he chuckled. "But I won't have to for awhile, I'm sure."

"Sorry," I said, smiling at him. "Maybe you should have Carlisle check it out."

"Have me check what out?" asked Carlisle as he, Charlie, and Esme came into the living room from the kitchen.

"Nothing," muttered Edward, glaring at me as he let go of my hand. I laughed as I stood up.

"Gee, I really need to pee," I smirked.

"Too much information, Bella," yelled Charlie, as I headed out of the room.

I heard Edward mutter something under his breath. I went into the bathroom, quickly peed, washed my hands, and went back out to the living room. Edward mocked glared from his seat on the couch as I came in.

"So how was the rodeo last night?" I asked, sitting down next to Edward.

"Pretty busy," said Charlie. He was sitting in his recliner. Carlisle and Esme were sitting on the smaller of the two couches. Charlie looked over at them before turning back to me. "Bella, I'd like to talk to you about something."

"What?" I asked, warily.

"Well, I, um, was thinking that, um, maybe it would be…helpful if…" he trailed off as he looked up at Carlisle and Esme.

"Carlisle and I would like to go back to Chicago with you," said Esme.

I sat there watching the three of them as they watched me. They had to be kidding, right? Why would I want them to come with me? They would know everything. I couldn't have them hearing everything. It was hard enough knowing what he did to me. I stood up and headed over to the stairs.

"Bella-"

"No," I said, turning to look at them. "No, I can't….just no."

I turned and made my way to my bedroom, slamming my door behind me. I curled up in front of the window to my room. It had been hard enough to tell Edward. At least he understood how much it hurt to be lied to, to be manipulated by someone you loved. Carlisle and Esme would never understand how…humiliated I was. They could never know just how much he had hurt me, nobody could.

"You have ten minutes to shower and change," said Edward. I looked back and saw him standing in the doorway to my bedroom. I didn't even hear the door open.

"Why?" I asked.

"Cause you and I are going to Amarillo," he smiled. I snorted and shook my head. "Seriously, I need to go by Walmart and you need to get out of this town."

"Can I drive?" I asked. Edward scrunched up his face so I pouted. "Please?"

"Fine," he sighed, shaking his head. "But your driving skills had better have improved."

"Guess you'll just have to wait and see," I smirked, standing up.

Edward groaned as he turned and headed back downstairs. I rolled my eyes as I went over and shut my bedroom door. Like I didn't know what was going on here. They had talked him into trying to talk me into letting them go back with us. They must think I am incredibly stupid.

I quickly showered and got dressed. I pulled my hair up into a messy ponytail before I headed downstairs. As soon as I stepped off the last stair, Charlie, Carlisle, and Esme stopped talking. Edward was leaning against the wall next to the front door. He looked over at me, motioned to them, and rolled his eyes. I bit my lip to stop from laughing out loud.

"I'll be back later," I said, grabbing my purse.

"Bella-"

"Don't wait up, you never know what Edward and I will decide to do," I said, looking back at my father. "Maybe I'll get a tattoo."

Edward try to cover up his snort by coughing but was unable to. I threw open the front door and hurried out to my car. Edward rolled his eyes as he climbed into the passenger seat of my car. He made a show of pulling on his seatbelt, making sure it was snug around his body.

"So fucking hilarious, Edward," I muttered, starting the car.

He laughed as I pulled my car out of the driveway and headed back into town. We stopped by his house so he could shower and change before we headed onto the highway toward Amarillo. We were about half way into our hours drive when I turned down the radio and looked over at him.

"You might as well get it over with," I said.

"Get what over with?" he asked. I snorted and rolled my eyes.

"Don't play dumb with me, Edward," I said, passing a green minivan. "I know they told you to talk to me. They used to pull that shit all the time with me and Alice."

"Fine, they did," sighed Edward. "They just want to be there for you. To show you that you aren't alone."

"I know," I said.

"But," he prompted.

"I don't want them to know," I muttered.

"You don't want them to know what he did to you that night or at all over the six years he abused you?" asked Edward.

"All of it," I sighed, shaking my head. "I have enough guilt about…everything decision I've ever made."

"Bella, you do know that none of them blame you for what he did, don't you?" asked Edward.

"They should," I whispered. "Did you know that Charlie, Carlisle, and Esme tried to talk me out of taking the scholarship to Duke?"

"Yes," said Edward. I looked over at him. "I heard them talking one night before you and Alice graduated."

"Oh." I turned my attention back to the road. "They told me that I wasn't ready to go so far away from home. That I would be alone and that I should look at going to Tech or UT or someplace. I told them that you just don't turn down a scholarship to Duke University. Maybe I should have."

"You don't mean that," scoffed Edward.

"Don't I?" I asked. "If I had never gone to Duke, I would have never had met him. I wouldn't have gotten married instead of going to grad school. I wouldn't have had to move to a city I hate, and, most importantly, I wouldn't have spent six years in hell with a man who's idea of fun was to throw me into the shower and scald me with hot water."

"He did that?" muttered Edward. I looked over at him and saw him glaring at the road in front of us.

"Yes," I mumbled.

"Ok, so maybe you do mean that you shouldn't have gone to Duke, but you did and now you have to deal with all of that and move on."

"I know. I just don't know how," I murmured.

Edward and I pulled into the Walmart parking lot a few minutes later. We headed inside, nodding to the little old man who greeted us at the door. I grabbed a basket and we headed over to the beauty products. Edward grabbed a bottle of strawberry scented shampoo.

"You use strawberry shampoo?" I asked. I leaned over and sniffed him. He smelled good, like the beach and sawdust but not strawberries.

"Stop smelling me," chuckled Edward, leaning away from me. "It's for you."

"Me?" I asked. "Are you saying I stink?"

"No," snorted Edward. "I just remember that you liked strawberry shampoo."

"Oh," I whispered, smiling.

"Yeah, I mean, I use a more manly shampoo," muttered Edward, looking away from me. He grabbed a bottle of Old Spice hair and body. "This will work."

"That smells good," I murmured. Edward and I went around the corner to the body soaps.

"Need any?" he asked, looking over at me. His cheeks were a light pink. I bit my lip as I looked over at the shelves. I smiled and pulled a bottle of Dove off the shelf.

"This is my favorite," I smiled. "Mike hated the lavender scent and wouldn't let me use it anymore. I think I'll get it."

"Sounds good," smiled Edward.

Edward and I each grabbed a new toothbrush and tooth paste, deodorant, and razors. He seemed to think it was funny that I was getting pink razors with daisies on the handles. I ignored him. From there we headed back toward the fishing stuff but I stopped him and pulled him into the toy isle.

"Oh, look at these," I laughed, pulling off two Nerf swords. I tossed him one. "These are awesome."

"Good thing Emmett and Alice didn't have these when we were little," chuckled Edward, examining his. "They would have beat the shit out of each other."

"Hmp," snorted a woman behind him as she dragged the five year old little boy away. I laughed loudly.

"Oh, you are in trouble," I snickered.

"Whatever," he muttered.

"I'm buying this," I announced, tossing my sword in the basket.

"Why?" asked Edward, chuckling.

"I might need it in Chicago," I said, softly.

"Good idea," mused Edward, tossing his in. "I'll take one too. You know, just in case."

Edward and I spent another hour just mulling around inside Walmart. He picked up some new hooks for his fishing pole and a new CD that he was looking for. We headed over to the grocery side of the store and picked up some bottle water, chips, and toilet paper. We headed up to the front and got into line. Once it was our turn, he started putting my stuff up with his.

"I'm getting my stuff," I said, pulling it back.

"Nonsense," he said, pushing them back up. I glared at him and started pulling everything back.

"I don't need you to pay for my shit," I snapped.

"I know you don't, Bella, but I still am," insisted Edward, grabbing my stuff and pushing it forward. I opened my mouth but he put his hand over it. "No, I am buying this and that's the end of it."

"Fine," I muttered, throwing his hand off of me. "So much for letting me make my own decisions, huh?"

I stormed past him and headed out to the car. Of course the car was locked and I had left my purse with Edward. Mentally slapping myself, I leaned against the car and waited for him to come out, which he did a few minutes later.

"I'm sorry. I'm a huge ass," he muttered.

"Yes, you are," I said, looking at my feet. "It's just…I've been told what I could buy, how much I could spend for a long time, Edward. I don't need anyone to do again."

"I wasn't try to, I just…" he trailed off. "Look, I'm sorry. I won't do it again."

"You just what, Edward?" I asked. He sighed as he looked up at me.

"It's just that, I don't have a lot of friends, Bella," he said, frowning softly. "There's Em and Jasper, I suppose but Jasper is so in love with Alice that it's quite disgusting and Emmett's idea of fun is going to the bar to see, and I quote 'whose ass I'm going to tap.' When I with you, I guess I just feel like someone needs me. It's stupid, I know."

"It's not stupid, Edward," I said, softly, reaching out and grabbing his hand. "I do need you. You're the only person I really trust right now."

"I just don't want you to think that I'm like…him," muttered Edward.

"Oh, Edward, I don't," I gasped. "You are nothing like him."

"I promise not to do that again, Ok?" he asked, flashing me his puppy dog face.

"That's so cheating," I mumbled, grabbing my purse from the basket. "Fine, I forgive you, you ass. Now load up our shit so we can go."

Edward laughed as I popped the trunk. We loaded all our stuff and he put the basket back up while I climbed into the driver's seat. We stopped at Taco Bell and grabbed a couple of tacos before we headed back to Clarendon. We were almost home when I turned down the radio again.

"Edward, do you think I should have Carlisle and Esme come with us?" I asked, softly.

"Yes, I do, but it's your choice," he said, looking over at me. "It certainly doesn't hurt to have all the support you can get."

"I guess you're right," I muttered, watching the road.

I reached over and turned the radio back up. Half an hour later, I pulled my car up in Charlie's drive way. Carlisle and Esme's car was still there only now, Alice and Jasper's truck, and Emmett's jeep were here. I shared a look with Edward as we climbed out of the car. We grabbed our purchases from the trunk of his car. Edward tossed his inside his car before we headed into the house.

Charlie, Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Jasper, Alice, and, oddly enough, Rose, were sitting around the living room when we came in. They stopped talking and I looked back at Edward, who just snorted and nodded his head. Yep, they were talking about me again.

"Have fun at…" Alice paused and took a deep breath. "Walmart?"

"Yes," I smiled, pulling out my Nerf sword. "Look, what I got? Now I can slay dragons."

"Dragons?" asked Emmett, snorting.

"Yes, Emmett, dragons. Mean, ugly, hateful, dragons," I said, softly. "Anyway, I had better go put this stuff up and start packing."

"Um, ok," said Charlie as I headed over to the stairs with Edward following.

"Oh, you had better get packed too, Carlisle and Esme," I said, heading up the stairs. "You know, if you still want to come."

I heard Emmett, Alice, and Jasper start questioning them as Edward and I went into my room. I shut the door behind me and laid my stuff on the bed. I turned back to Edward.

"Are you sure they won't blame me?" I asked. Edward smiled as he pulled me into his arms.

"I'm sure," he whispered. "Just trust me."

"I do, Edward," I murmured. "It's me I don't trust."


	10. Chapter 10

Ten

**CHPOV**

"Ok, I think that's everything," I said, loading the last of our luggage into the back of Emmett's oversized jeep. I looked around at everyone. "I guess we're ready to go."

"We'll meet you at the airport in Amarillo," said Edward, laying his hand on Bella's shoulder. She shook her head and looked around.

"What'd you say?" she asked.

"I said we'll meet them in Amarillo," smiled Edward.

"Oh, yeah," mumbled Bella, looking back at the ground. "Amarillo, right."

"Ok," I nodded.

I climbed into the front seat of Carlisle and Esme's car while Emmett, Rose, Jasper, and Alice climbed into Emmett's jeep. I turned and saw Edward whisper something to Bella. She nodded her head and climbed into the passenger seat of his car. He ran around and climbed into the driver's seat. Carlisle pulled the car out of the driveway and we headed to the Amarillo Airport.

"She's going to be ok, Charlie," said Esme, patting me on the shoulder from the backseat.

"I hope so," I muttered, looking out the window.

The day my Bella was born was the happiest day of my life. Of course, most people would tell you that it should have been the day I married Renee, and while that was a close second, the day Bella was born was the day everything came together. That was the day I became a daddy.

I met Renee at West Texas A&M University. I was a junior, she was a freshman. It was one of those typical stories, I suppose. I saw her sitting across the library, book in front of her nose, hair in a messy ponytail, and a frantic scared look planted on her face. It was finals time for our fall semester and we were all a little nervous but as a freshman, Renee was frantic. Being a good upperclassman, I went over and pulled the book out of her hands. She snapped her head up at me and I found myself lost in the most incredible pair of blue eyes. She demanded that I give her the book back but I refused and insisted on taking her out for a real meal. She tried to fight me on it, claiming to need to study for her biology final the next day but I talked her into it.

We headed down to the dining hall and found an empty table in the back of the room. She barely picked at the cheeseburger she had chosen while she told me all about the small town she came from. It was even smaller than Clarendon. I just sat there and listen to her ramble on and on. She was beautiful and funny. Suddenly, she stopped talking and blushed the brightest shade of red I had ever seen. She apologized for talking so much but I waved her off. After she finally ate all of her food, we headed back to the library where I spent the next two hours telling her exactly what she needed to know for the final. Just one of those perks of having already taken the class.

The next day, I was walking across campus when she came running up to me. She said that everything I had told her to study was on there and she felt she did really good. Then she kissed me. That was the moment when Renee became mine.

"Charlie, you ok?" asked Esme. I shook my head and saw that we were already at the airport.

"Yeah, just thinking," I muttered, climbing out of the car.

"You sure?" asked Carlisle. I chuckled softly.

"I was just thinking about Renee," I said, softly.

"I miss her, too," whispered Esme.

I didn't say anything as I followed them into the small airport. It only took us about ten minutes to check in for our flights, check our luggage, make our way through security, and find our way down to our gate. We would load onto a small eagle jet plane that would practically hop as it took us from Amarillo to Dallas where we would board our connecting flight to Chicago.

"Come on," said Edward, grabbing Bella's hand and dragging her to her feet.

"Where are we going?" asked Bella.

"I need coffee," shrugged Edward, pulling her after him. I watched as Bella let Edward pull her down the terminal. She looked so much like her mother.

Renee went out for the next year and half before we were married. We stayed in Canyon, Texas for two and half more years while Renee finished her degree and I went to work for one of the local ranches. As soon as she graduated, we packed up our feeble belongings and moved to Clarendon. Renee had gotten a job as the new kindergarten teacher and I found a job at one of the feed yards. We moved into the house my parents had left me when they died and started our lives together. A few months later, Renee found out she was pregnant with Bella.

We were ecstatic about having a baby. That's how Renee and I met Carlisle and Esme. They had just moved to Clarendon to open the much needed doctor's office. Esme had gotten a job at the high school. Emmett was five and Edward was only three. Renee was Emmett's kindergarten teacher. Renee and Esme met during open house and became fast friends. When they both became pregnant within just a few months of each other, Esme first and then Renee, they got even closer. Alice was born in early June and Bella was born in September.

Renee was the most incredible mother. She was so patient with me and Bella. She never got irritated when Bella kept us up all night. She took it all in stride and just enjoyed being a mom. I tried to be there as much as I could but between trying to get my ranch going and starting my new job as the town sheriff, I just couldn't be there as much as I should have. Story of my life, I guess.

"Now boarding flight number 2311 Amarillo to Dallas."

"Guess, that's us," I said, standing up. Bella was staring off into space, a small frown playing on her lips. "Bella?"

"Bella," said Edward, shaking her shoulder. Bella shook her head and looked over at Edward.

"I'm sorry, what?" asked Bella. I looked over at Carlisle. He just shook his head. I guess that means he didn't have an answer for me either.

"It's time to board the plane," said Edward, cocking an eyebrow at her.

"Oh, ok," muttered Bella, standing up.

She grabbed her carry on bag and headed off to the gate without looking back at us. Edward followed her. I sighed inwardly as I grabbed my own bag and headed over and got in line for our first flight. A few minutes later, we boarded our plane. Edward and Bella were sitting on the left side of the isle. Alice and Jasper sat behind them. Emmett and Rose ended up in the seats behind me, Carlisle, and Esme.

"Oh my god, I can't believe you went there," laughed Bella, leaning towards Edward. She looked back at someone in the back of the plane and snorted. "But you are right, he does look like Richard Grieco but about fifty pounds heavier."

"No shit," snorted Edward. "I never thought he was good looking anyway."

"Me either," snickered Bella. "I always thought he looked goofy."

I smiled to myself as I turned back to the front of the plane. It was nice to see Bella smiling again, even if it was only when she was with Edward.

When Renee died, it nearly tore me apart. I tried to be strong for Bella but it was so hard. Renee was my anchor. She was the one who knew how to make Bella's lunches just the way she liked them. She knew how to get Bella to do her homework without arguing. Renee was just the perfect mom. The day she dies was the day I lost a part of myself.

Bella was barely ten when Renee was killed in a car accident. We had gotten a freak winter storm just before Halloween. The roads were icy and slick. Renee was on her way back from Amarillo when she was hit by a semi that had hit a sheet of black ice going way too fast. He crossed into her lane and hit her head on. She was killed instantly.

Neither Bella nor I were the same after that. Esme tried to step in and help with Bella but I think a part of Bella resented Esme. Maybe she felt like Esme was trying to take Renee's place as her mother. Carlisle suggested more than once that I should take Bella to a shrink but I thought she was doing ok. I mean, she and Alice were best friends, she was an excellent student, got along with everyone. Ok, so maybe she didn't go out like a lot of the other kids did. She didn't really date much either but she was so busy with school, cheerleading, band, basketball, and everything else that honestly, she didn't have time to date.

I guess that's why I was so surprised when she brought that asshole home at Christmas during her junior year at Duke. Even then there was something about him that rubbed me the wrong way. He didn't do anything or say anything to cross me but there was something about him. He had a tendency to hover over Bella but I didn't think much about it then. For the first time since her mother died, I saw Bella smile.

I started getting concerned though when Bella stopped coming home as much. First it was for spring break, then summer. When she came home the following Thanksgiving, she spent nearly the whole time on the phone with him. I should have seen the possessiveness in him then but I didn't.

After she married him, she stopped nearly all communications with me completely. She would call maybe once a month. She said she had been so busy. She would email me but they were vague. I was blind to what was really going on with her. I tried to go out to see her several times and every time there were reasons why I couldn't. They were going on vacation, or the house was under repair. I was an idiot for buying all of that shit.

It wasn't until a month ago that I got the phone call. I had just locked up the house for the night and was heading up to my bedroom when the phone rang. I nearly let it go to the machine but something inside of me told me to answer it.

"_Hello."_

"_Daddy," whispered Bella. I could hear how broken she sounded. _

"_Bella, honey, what's wrong?" I asked._

"_Daddy, I…I'm coming there," she whispered. I heard her voice crack. _

"_Bella, what's wrong?" I asked, sitting down at the kitchen table. _

"_I can't…" she trailed off._

"_Tell him," I heard a woman whisper in the back ground. _

"_Daddy, he hurt me," whispered Bella so softly, I wasn't sure I heard her correctly._

"_Who?" I asked, heatedly. I knew but I needed to hear it. _

"_Mike," muttered Bella. I closed my eyes as I leaned my head onto my hand. "He tried to kill me and I…"_

"_Did you press charges?" I asked, softly._

"_Yes," cried Bella. I heard the phone drop as Bella cried harder._

"_Mr. Swan, my name is Rosalie Hale," said a woman I had never even met. "I'm the DA who is handling the case against Mike. I am loading Bella into her car in the morning. She will be there in a day or so. She needs you, sir."_

"_I'll be here," I said, letting a tear slip down my face. _

"_Mr. Swan, it's bad," said Rose, softly. "He hurt her pretty badly."_

"_This has been happening for awhile, hasn't it?" I whispered._

"_I think so," said Rose. "I have to go but she'll be there."_

"_Tell her I love her," I whispered._

"_I will."_

Bella pulled up to the house thirty-two hours later, bruised and battered. Bile rose up in my throat as I thought about that man putting his hands on her like that. Lord knows I've tried to help her. I've tried to be patient. I've tried to push her into getting help but nothing's working.

"Uno," chuckled Bella. I looked over at her and Edward. She smiled as Edward drew four cards from the deck.

"I swear you are cheating," muttered Edward.

"You've always been such a sore loser," scoffed Bella, looking up at me. She quickly looked down at the card in her hand. She placed a red three on top of Edward's green three. "I win…again."

"Rematch," grumbled Edward, gathering all the card together.

I smiled and turned back to the front. If anyone is going to help Bella, it will probably be Edward. Maybe they will end up helping each other.


	11. Chapter 11

Eleven

EPOV

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we will be landing at Chicago O'Hare International Airport momentarily."

I tuned the flight attendant out as I looked over at Bella. She was staring out the window of the plane, watching the city under us. She had taken to staring off into space several times during our flights. I knew better than to ask her what she was thinking. First, I knew she wouldn't tell me with everyone right here. Second, I knew she was trying to gather as much courage as she could to come back here.

So instead of saying anything, I reached over and took her hand into mine. She turned her head and smiled at me. Bella laid her head on my shoulder and went back to staring into space. A few minutes later, our plane touched the ground and rolled to the gate. I felt, rather than heard, Bella sigh.

"It's going to be ok," I whispered, turning my lips to the top of her head.

"Yeah?" she whispered. "I'm not so sure."

"You brought your Nerf sword, didn't you?" I asked. Bella chuckled and looked up at me.

"Yes," she smiled. "But I don't think it will help."

"Probably not but it'll be fun," I said, returning her smile.

"Nothing about this trip will be fun, Edward," frowned Bella. "Nothing."

Bella pulled her hand out of mine and stood up. We gathered our carryon bags and followed everyone off the plane and down to the baggage claim. Once we had all our luggage, we headed out front to catch a cab.

"Ok, well, I guess I'll see you in the morning down at the courthouse," said Rose, grabbing Bella's hands. "Try to get some rest tonight, ok?"

"I'll try," whispered Bella. Rose leaned in and whispered something into Bella's ear. "I'll remember that."

"Good," said Rose, softly. She stepped back and looked around at all of us. I noticed her eyes stayed on Emmett for a second longer than rest of us. "Well, take care of her tonight. I'll see you all in the morning."

"Goodnight, Rosalie," smiled Emmett.

"Goodnight," blushed Rose, turning to her cab.

I cocked an eyebrow at Bella, who was biting her lip to stop from laughing. Emmett and Rosalie? She shook her head softly to my silent question. It took us two cabs to get everyone loaded up. We were cramped but at least we were loaded. Bella was sitting in the backseat between me and Charlie. Bella looped her arm though mine as we headed down to the hotel.

That night as I climbed into my bed, ignoring the snores coming from Emmett in the bed next to me, I thought back to the past few years of my life. After I graduated from high school, I headed down to Austin and attended the University of Texas. I was ready to go someplace where I wasn't known as Emmett's little brother or Alice's big brother. I wanted to go somewhere where I was just Edward. I found that place at UT.

I met Jessica during my last year of grad school. She was a senior accounting major at UT. She was beautiful, sweet, kind. I thought I was in love with her. We were together for two years when things started to change. She started pushing me to go to medical school and become a doctor. She said I wasted my double degrees in mathematics and biology. I told her that I didn't want to be a doctor. I wanted to teach.

I was going to marry her until I walked into our apartment in Austin and found her riding the cock of some young kid who was barely out of his teens. She tried to tell me that it was accident. That she didn't mean for it to happen. That she was sorry. I didn't really give a shit. I had had enough. I packed up all my stuff and moved back to Clarendon.

To say it was humiliating to move back here, would be an understatement. Carlisle and Esme kept pushing me to tell them what had happened with Jessica but I couldn't tell them. They had never liked her and this would just prove that they were right. I got a job at the college and found my house. For the last year I've kept to myself, trying to deal with the fact that I was going to be alone. Maybe that's why I feel such a need to help Bella. I don't want her to end up as lonely as I am.

I was shaken out of my thoughts when my cell phone vibrated on the table next to the bed. I reached over and opened the text message from Bella.

**You asleep?-B**

**No. You aren't either I see.-E**

**How'd you figure that one out, Sherlock? Meet me in the hall-B**

**Why?-E**

**Just do it-B**

**Fine-E**

I climbed of my bed, grabbed the room key, and headed out into the hall. Bella stepped out of her room, quietly shutting the door so she wouldn't wake Charlie, and tiptoed over to me. She was wearing a pair of plaid pajamas and one of my t-shirts. Her long hair was pulled up in a messy bun on the back of her head.

"Where did you get my shirt?" I asked.

"I stole it," shrugged Bella, quietly. She grabbed my hand and started pulling me down the hallway. "Come on. Let's go."

"Where?" I asked, following her.

"It's a secret mission," whispered Bella.

"I don't have shoes on," I chuckled, softly. I looked down and saw that she was also barefoot. "You don't have shoes on."

"It doesn't matter," muttered Bella.

Bella dragged me down to the elevator and into the lobby. She kept pulling me until she had pulled me outside of the hotel, to where a cab was waiting for us. She climbed into the backseat so I climbed in after her. She rattled off an address to the driver but didn't explain where we were going and I didn't ask.

Twenty minutes later, the cab pulled up in front of an oversized red brick house. Even in the dark, I could tell that it was at least twice as bid as any house in Clarendon. Bella tossed some money to the driver and told him to stay before she climbed out of the car. I climbed out after her. The cab, of course, took off as soon as the door was shut.

"Asshole," muttered Bella. She turned back to the house and just stared at it.

"Um, Bella, where are we?" I asked.

"This is my house," she whispered. I took a deep breath as I looked back at the house.

"Oh," I muttered.

"It's ugly, isn't it?" she said. "I hated this house but Mike insisted that it would represent who he was. He said that as a future law partner that he had to have the best of everything."

"It's horrible," I agreed. Bella headed up the front walk. "Where are you going?"

"Inside," she said.

I followed Bella inside the house. She flipped a couple lights on and I barely stifled my gasp. The living room looked completely trashed. The lamps on the table had been knocked over. Pictures frames had been smashed to the ground. Bella went over and picked up one of the few pictures that was still on the built in book shelve.

"This was from our honeymoon," she said, not looking up at me. "I wanted to go someone warm but Mike wanted to Alaska. I nearly froze my ass off."

"I bet," I said, not really sure what to say.

Bella reared back and threw the picture against the wall, shattering the glass. She started grabbing everything she could and throwing against the wall. I just stood back while she destroyed everything that reminded her of him. Eventually she made her way into the kitchen and started throwing dishes.

"IT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH, BELLA," she screamed. "IT'S NOT HOT ENOUGH. IT'S LATE. WHY CAN'T YOU DO ANYTHING RIGHT, YOU STUPID WHORE!"

Bella continued to scream as she threw everything onto the floor until she collapsed onto the floor, panting and sobbing at the same time. I made my way over and settled onto the floor next to her, pulling her into my lap and just held her. She had been holding so much inside for so long that it took everything for her to get it all out.

"He would be so pissed if he saw this place like this," said Bella. "He insisted that I keep this place spotless. Do you know how long it takes to thoroughly clean this house?"

"No," I whispered.

"At least six hours on a good day," said Bella, laying her head on my chest. "Of course he always found something that I didn't clean right. He would yell and scream at me to stop being so stupid. Usually, he would just force me to do it again but sometimes he would get so mad that he would hit me."

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"Don't be," she said, softly. "It's not your fault. I should have seen the signs. I should have known that he was a monster."

"You loved him," I said. I felt a pang in my chest that I didn't quite understand. Bella shook her head and pulled away from me.

"That's the thing," she sighed. "I don't know that I did. I think I loved the idea of him. You know, someone that loved me, that wanted me, but I don't think I loved him. I think I was just tired of always feeling out of place and he made me feel wanted for the first time."

"I guess I get that," I frowned. "I think it was the same way with Jessica. I mean, when I first met her, she was great. She liked me for me, and not because of who my siblings are."

"I get that," murmured Bella. She pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. "I'm really scared about tomorrow."

"I know you are," I said, leaning against the wall and bringing my own knees up. "But you'll be ok."

"What if he gets off?" asked Bella, laying her head on her knees. "He'll come after me. He'll kill me. I know he will."

"I won't let him," I said, reaching over and weaving my fingers in with hers. She looked up from our joined hands to my eyes. "I'll keep you safe."

"Promise?" she asked.

"I promise," I smiled. I stood up and pulled her to her feet. "We should get back to the hotel before the parents start freaking out."

"Ok," murmured Bella, tightening her grip on my hand.

We made our way back through the house. Bella looked back once more before she turned off the lights, and shut the door. We sat on the curb while we waited for the cab to show up. Once it did, we climbed in and headed back to the hotel. Bella and I headed inside and up to our floor. I stopped outside of her room.

"Are you ok now?" I asked.

"I think so," she smiled, softly. She leaned up on her toes and pressed her lips onto my cheek. "Thank you for going with me."

"You're welcome," I whispered.

Bella smiled at me as she unlocked her door and stepped inside. I headed across the hall to my own room, with my own goofy smile on my face. I let myself in and climbed back onto my bed. I rolled onto my side and pulled the blanket up. I was falling in love with her. I just wasn't sure she would ever love me back.


	12. Chapter 12

Twelve

BPOV

I climbed out of my bed the next morning after not sleeping at all. Charlie was laying in his bed, snoring softly. Not that long a time ago the thought of sharing a room with my father and listening to him snore would have been the worst thing ever but now, I don't mind it as much. At least this way, I know he was here for me.

I grabbed my clothes for the day and headed into the bathroom. Starting the shower, I stripped off my clothes and stepped in under the water. My arms were a little sore from destroying all that shit in my house last night but I will admit, it felt great to finally let loose like that. Each room of that house had been filled with nothing but pain and misery. I was tired of dealing with it all.

I quickly showered and dried off. I dried my hair and pulled it up into a ponytail, knowing that Mike hated it when I wore my hair up. I pulled on the black pants and white blouse I had brought and slipped my feet into my flats. I gathered my pajamas and headed back out into the hotel room. Charlie was sitting up on the side of the bed, stretching.

"Morning, Dad." I said, softly.

"Morning, Bella," he said, stifling his yawn. "Did you sleep ok?"

"Not really," I frowned. "I didn't really sleep at all."

"You should have woken me up," he said. "I'd have kept you company."

"You were snoring like a freight train, Dad," I laughed. "I don't think anyone could have woken you up."

"That's probably true," he chuckled, standing up. "I'm just going to hop into the shower real quick."

"Ok, I'm going to head down to the lobby," I said, softly.

"Ok."

I headed out of the room and made my way down to the lobby. I settled on one of the couches that was scattered around the floor. I picked up the paper that someone had left sitting on the table and pretended to read it but I couldn't focus on the news. All I could think about was how I was going to have to stand up in front of everyone and tell them what he did to me. It terrified me to think about them knowing it all, about them hating me for it.

"Morning, Bella," said Emmett, plopping down on the couch next to me.

"Morning, Emmett," I mumbled, looking up at him and nearly gasped out loud. "Did you actually comb your hair?"

"Yes," he muttered. "It's not like I don't usually comb my hair."

"If you say so," I scoffed. I leaned over and sniffed him. "Are you….are you wearing cologne?"

"No," he snorted. I cocked my eyebrow at him. "Ok, maybe."

"Why are you wearing cologne, Emmett?" I asked, smiling at him. "Do you have a little crush on a certain blond district attorney?"

"No," he mumbled, blushing as he looked away.

"Aw, look at that blush," I teased. "Who would have ever thought that Emmett Cullen would blush about a woman?"

"Shut up, Bella," grumbled Emmett.

"I think it's sweet, Emmett," I smiled, leaning back.

"What's sweet?" asked Edward. Emmett shook his head at me while pleading with me not to say anything with his eyes.

"Nothing," I laughed, shaking my head at the big oaf. I looked back at Edward. He was wearing a pair of khaki pants and a white dress shirt. He had attempted to comb his wild hair but hadn't been as successful as Emmett was. "Did you sleep ok?"

"Once I was able to drown out Emmett's snoring," chuckled Edward, sitting on the arm of the couch next to me. "How about you?"

"I didn't sleep at all," I whispered.

"I didn't think you would," said Edward, frowning. He stood up and pulled me to my feet. "Which is why we need coffee."

"I think you have an addiction to coffee," I laughed, following him.

"I do," he admitted, smiling back at me. "But I can't help it. It lures me in with it's sweet aroma."

"Oh, man, you really do have a problem," I chuckled.

Edward and I got our coffee and headed back to where Emmett was. Jasper, Alice, Carlisle, Esme, and Charlie had made their way down and were waiting for us. Nobody said anything as we headed outside and squeezed into a couple of cabs. I hooked my arm in with Edward's as we headed down to the courthouse.

We headed inside and found Rose waiting for us outside the courtroom doors. Before I could say anything to her though, I saw Mike's parents, Karen and David Newton, coming down the hall. I had never particularly liked either of them. They looked right at me and I felt my entire body tense up.

"Well, if it isn't the little bitch who caused all this shit," sneered Karen. "I can't believe you would actually show your face here."

"Please do not talk to my witness," snapped Rose, stepping in between us.

"She got everything she deserved," said David, harshly.

He grabbed a hold of his wife's arm and dragged her into the courtroom. I bit my lip as I looked down at the ground, desperately trying to stop the tears from falling down my face. I could barely hear Charlie talking, demanding Rose do something about them. I could feel my body start to shake. I felt someone place their hand on my shoulder but I couldn't look up at them.

"Bella? Bella?" asked Edward, lifting my face up. I could feel my tears spill over down my cheeks. "Hey, ignore them. They are just a couple of asses."

"I can't do this, Edward," I whispered, shaking my head. "I can't go in there…I…"

"Yes, you can," he whispered, cupping my face in his hands. He gently wiped my tears off my face. "I'm right here. Charlie's right here. We are not leaving you."

"Edward," I cried, laying my head on his chest as I clung to him, fisting his shirt into my hands.

"It's ok," he murmured, wrapping his arms around me.

"Please don't leave me," I begged.

"I'm never leaving," murmured Edward.

"Bella?" asked Rose, placing he hand on my shoulder. I turned my head and looked over at her. "Honey, it's time for me to go in. They'll call you in, in a little bit, ok?"

I nodded my head softy. Rose, Emmett, Alice, Jasper, Carlisle, and Esme headed inside the courtroom with her while Charlie, Edward and I took our seats in the hallway. They sat of me, each with one of my hands in theirs. I'm not sure how long we sat there, completely silent when the doors to the courtroom opened.

"Isabella Newton."

I stood up and took a deep breath as I walked over to the door. Charlie and Edward followed me in and took a seat in the back while I headed down the isle to the front of the courtroom. Mike glared at me from his seat behind the defense table. I tried not to look at him but I couldn't stop myself. After the bailiff swore me in, I sat down and looked over at Rose. She smiled as she stood up from her table and came over and stood next in front of me.

"Can you state your name for the record, please?" she asked.

"Isabella Swan Newton," I said, shakily. I could feel Mike's anger from across the courtroom. My hands were shaking and I could already feel the tears building in my eyes.

"Isabella, how long have you been married to the defendant?" asked Rose.

"Six years," I answered.

"When did the defendant first hit you?" asked Rose.

"About a month after we were married."

"Can you tell us what happened?" asked Rose.

"Mike had come home from work and I didn't have dinner on the table. I tried to explain that it was almost ready but he told me shut up. He slapped me and threw me into the wall.," I said. "He, um, apologized immediately and promised not to do it again but he did."

"How long was it before he hit you the second time?" asked Rose.

"About a week later," I said. "I had accidentally burned his shirt while ironing. He, um,…he grabbed me by the hair and held my head down onto the ironing board. He picked up the iron and threatened to press it down on my face. I begged him not to. I swore that I would never do it again. He threw me into the wall and punched me in the stomach and told me that it had better not happen again."

"How often would you say that he has hit you in the past six years?" asked Rose, handing me a tissue.

"At least once a week if not more often," I said. "Sometimes he would come home angry about something at work and he would take it out on me. Sometimes he would find anything that I didn't do the way he wanted me to. He looked for reasons to hurt me."

"How many trips to the emergency room would you say you have taken?" asked Rose.

"Um, at least a dozen."

"I would like to submit hospital records from at least five different hospitals in the area that documented the different injuries to Mrs. Newton at the hands of her husband," said Rose, turning to the judge.

"So submitted," he said, taking the files from her. He started flipping through them as I turned my attention back to Rose.

"Now, Isabella, can you tell us about the events on the night of May the nineteenth?" asked Rose.

"Mike and I had just returned from a trip to the emergency room where we…," I paused as I looked over at Edward, "found out that I had suffered a miscarriage. Mike threw me against the wall and accused me of having an abortion…."

I kept my eyes locked on Edward's as I went through the details of that night for everyone. My tears were falling down my face freely. I could hear the sounds of other's crying with me and I knew it was Esme and Alice but I couldn't look at them. All I could do was watch Edward, holding onto the strength that he was somehow giving me.

"…the last thing I remember was one of our neighbors, Leah Black, kneeling down next to me. She kept telling me to hang on but I passed out," I finished.

"Thank you, Isabella," said Rose, giving me a soft smile. She turned to the judge. "I have no more questions for this witness at this time."

"Mr. Carter, do you have any questions for the witness?" asked the judge, looking over at Mike's lawyer. I knew him as one of the partners at the law firm that Mike worked at, Gregory Carter.

"Yes, your honor," said Gregory, standing up. He laid his notepad down on the table and came over to me. "Mrs. Newton, you claim that my client has been abusing you for years, is that correct?"

"Yes," I said, softly.

"And in all the years that he allegedly abused you, did you ever call the police?" he asked.

"No, because-"

"You claim that he would hit you over and over again yet you never called the police?" he asked.

"No," I said, again. "Because-"

"Have the police ever been to your home in response to domestic disturbance call?" asked Gregory, interrupting me again.

"No," I sighed.

"Did you tell any friends that your husband was allegedly abusing you?"

"I didn't have any friends because he never let me out of the house," I said, harshly.

"Oh come on, Mrs. Newton. Your husband worked a lot of hours. How could he force you to stay in the house and work at the same time?" asked Gregory, smirking.

"He would call me fifty times a day to make sure I was there. If I wasn't there or I didn't answer the phone, he would come home and wait for me or beat me for not answering the phone. I learned to make sure he knew if I had to leave the house, and even then, he would give me a time frame to get my errands done," I explained. "If I was even one minute late, the consequences would be harsh."

"Like what?" he asked.

"Like the time I got stuck in a traffic jam coming back from the grocery store. I was five minutes late and Mike tied my hands to the banister leading to the upstairs of our house and whipped me with his belt. I had welts on my back and legs for weeks afterwards," I snapped.

"Mrs. Newton, isn't it true that you have numerous affairs during your six year marriage to my client?" asked Gregory.

"No," I said, leaning back in my seat. "Unlike your client, I was faithful."

"So your husband never caught you with your Gardner?" he asked.

"No," I muttered. "Sam had cut his hand on his sheers and I was cleaning his cut when Mike came in. Once Sam left, Mike accused me of having an affair. I denied it and he…broke my arm with a baseball bat."

"You never wanted a baby with your husband, did you, Mrs. Newton?" asked Gregory, switching his line of questioning.

"No," I said, looking down at my hands.

"You were so unhappy about being pregnant that you went to a clinic and got an abortion, didn't you?" he asked, harshly.

"No," I said, again. I could feel the tears pouring down my face. "I would never kill an innocent child just because his or her father was a monster."

"On the night of the so called attack on you, isn't true that you attacked him?" asked Gregory.

"No-"

"Isn't it true that you took a knife from the kitchen and tried to kill him?" snapped Gregory.

"NO," I yelled. "He tried to kill me. He called me a whore. He wrapped his hands around my neck and squeeze. If I hadn't fought back, I would be dead."

"So you claim," he smirked. "No further questions."

"Well, I think we will call it a day," said the Judge. "We will reconvene in the morning at ten a.m."

The judge banged his gavel and left the courtroom. The guards came out and handcuffed Mike and dragged him out of the courtroom. He watched me as they took him out. I struggled not to break my eyes away from his but I didn't want him to know that I was still terrified of him. Once he was out of the room, I climbed off the witness stand and headed to the back of the courtroom where everyone was waiting for me.

"You did really good, Bella," said Rose, patting my arm.

"If you say so," I murmured.

"What happens next?" asked Charlie.

"Tomorrow I am going to call a couple more witnesses and then the defense will start their cases," explained Rose.

"Can we leave please?" I asked as Karen and David Newton pushed past us.

"Yeah, let's go get some dinner," suggested Esme.

"I'm not hungry," I muttered.

"Bella, dear, you need to eat," said Esme.

"I am not hungry," I said, again.

"Why don't Bella and I just head back to the hotel while the rest of you eat?" said Edward, placing his hand on my shoulder.

"Fine, we'll bring you something back," said Esme, sadly.

"Whatever," I muttered.

I pushed past them all and headed out into the hallway. I hated that I was hurting her. She was the closest person I had to a mother but I couldn't let her in. I didn't want her to hurt more because of me. I quickly made my way out of the courthouse before I was completely overcome with grief. I felt my knees buckle but someone caught my before I could crumble to the ground.

"It's ok, Bella," whispered Edward, pulling me into his chest.

All I could do was clutch onto him, holding him as tightly as I could as he somehow managed to get into a cab with me still in his arms. It seemed like it took forever for the cab to pull up in front of the hotel. Edward tossed him some cash before climbing out. He carried me inside and up the elevator to his room. He laid me on his bed. He laid down next to me and pulled me into his arms and just held me until I cried myself to sleep.


	13. Chapter 13

Thirteen

I woke up the next morning with a raging headache. My head felt like there was a drum pounding inside and all I wanted was for it to stop. I moved to roll to my back but I felt Edward's arms still wrapped around me. I'm not even sure how I knew they were Edward's arms. Slowly, I opened my eyes and found him watching me with a frown on his face.

"You were talking in your sleep," he murmured. I sighed as I pulled out of his arms and sat up on the side of the bed. "Did you have a bad dream?"

"I don't remember," I whispered, not looking at him. "What did I say?"

"You just kept saying that you would learn and that you were sorry," said Edward. I felt the bed shift as he sat up. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No," I said, looking back at him. "I'm hungry. Want to grab some breakfast?"

"Sure," smiled Edward. However, the smile didn't quite reach his eyes. "How about I meet you in the hall in five? That gives us some time to change."

"Ok," I muttered, climbing off the bed.

I went over to the door and pulled it open. I looked back at Edward and opened my mouth but then closed it. Shaking my head, I walked out into the hall, pulling the door shut behind me. I headed over to my room and opened the door. Charlie was sitting on the side of his bed. He looked up at me, frowning. His hair was a mess and he looked like he hadn't slept at all.

"Morning, Honey," he said, softly.

"Morning," I muttered, letting the door shut behind me. I went over to my suitcase and pulled out my clothes for the day. "I, um, I'm just going to change real quick. Then Edward and I are going to get some breakfast."

"I'm sure if you wait a few minutes that we all can join you," suggested Charlie, standing up. He stepped toward me but I stepped back.

"I…" I trailed off, shaking my head. "That's ok."

I turned and practically jumped into the bathroom, shutting the door behind me. I took a couple deep breathes, trying to calm myself down. I quickly stripped off the pants and blouse from the day before and slipped on the black dress. I ran my hairbrush through my hair before I pulled it up into a messy bun on the back of my head.

I headed back out to the room and set my clothes into my suitcase. I looked back at Charlie, who was sitting on his bed watching me. Turning away, I headed back out into the hall. Why was it so hard for me to let him in?

"You ready?" asked Edward, coming out of his room wearing a pair of black dress pants and a soft blue shirt.

"Yeah," I said.

Edward and I headed down to the hotel restaurant. We took a table in the back. Our waitress came over and took our drink order, coffee for Edward and juice for me, and our breakfast order. Once she left, Edward reached across the table and grabbed my hand in his.

"Remember when Alice and I were ten and Charlie and Carlisle took the four of us camping down at the Palo Duro Canyon?" I asked, looking out the window.

"Yeah, it rained all night. You and Alice ended up sleeping in the back of the car while we slept in the water," said Edward.

"After we packed everything up, they decided we needed to go hiking. They lead us into this cave and we were about half way through when Alice started screaming about spiders. I looked back at her and she had daddy longlegs all over her," I chuckled, shaking my head. "She went running out of the cave, screaming 'I'll get you back for this, Daddy. If it's the last thing I do.' You, me, and Emmett ran after her while Charlie and Carlisle just laughed. We found her squatting behind a huge boulder, sobbing uncontrollably."

"Emmett lifted her into his arms and told her that he would keep the evil spiders away," said Edward. I looked over at him. "They aren't mad at you."

"I should have left the first time he hit me," I said, thickly. "The signs were there. Even before we got married, the signs were there, Edward. He would show up after every one of my classes. I thought he was just trying to be romantic. He would insist on studying with me in the library. He was always there. When I would come home, he would call every hour asking me what I was doing, who I was with. Why didn't I see it then?"

"I don't know," said Edward. "Why didn't I see that Jessica was going to cheat on me?"

"I don't know," I murmured. "Can I ask you something?"

"You just did," smiled Edward. I rolled my eyes as I smiled. "What do you want to know?"

"Have you ever told Carlisle and Esme about Jessica?" I asked. Edward took a deep breath and looked out the window.

"No," he muttered. "All they know is that I broke up with her."

"Why didn't you tell them?" I asked. He shook his head and looked back at me.

"Because I didn't want them to be right," he said. "They hated her. They, along with Emmett, Alice, and Jasper, all told me that she was not good enough for me, blah, blah, blah. I…I told them to shove it up their asses. I told them that she loved me, that she wouldn't hurt me. After she cheated on me, I couldn't tell them. They would have told me they told me so."

"I guess neither one of us is very good about letting them in, huh?" I asked, softly.

"Guess not," muttered Edward.

We didn't say anything else as our waitress brought our food. Once we were done eating, we paid our bill and headed out to the lobby. Charlie, Carlisle, Esme, Alice, Jasper, and Emmett were waiting for us. All of them were just sitting there, silent and tense. They looked up at the two of us as we came over and I saw the pity flash across all of their faces. I turned away from them. Just want I needed, for them to feel sorry for me.

"I guess we should go," I muttered, looking outside of the hotel. "It looks windy today."

"Bella," said Esme, placing her hand on my shoulder. I looked back at her with tears building in my eyes.

"We should really go," I whispered, pulling myself away from her hand.

"Ok," sighed Esme.

Edward took my hand in his and led me our of the hotel. I heard the other's sigh as they followed us out. Once again, we split up into two different cabs and headed down to the courthouse. Rose was waiting for us outside the courtroom again. I swear she blushed as she looked up at Emmett.

"How are you this morning?" asked Rose, tearing her eyes off Emmett and looking over at me.

"Fine," I muttered.

"Ok, well, if you say so," she sighed, looking around. "Are you sure you want to sit through this today?"

"No, but this is why we are here, right?" I asked, walking past her.

I headed in and sat down in the front row right behind her seat. Edward and Charlie sat on either side of me while Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Alice, and Jasper sat behind us. Karen and David Newton came in and sat on the opposite side from us but not before glaring at me. I just stared at them until they looked away. Rose came in just before the doors to the back of the courtroom opened and the guards dragged Mike in.

He looked over at me and stared, a cold hateful stare. The guards threw him in the seat next to his attorney and un-cuffed him. He looked back at me before he leaned in and whispered something to his attorney before facing the front. His attorney looked back at me and smirked. The judge came in and called the courtroom to order.

"Ms. Hale, call your next witness," said the judge.

"I call Jacob Black to the stand," said Rose, standing up.

The doors in the back of the courtroom opened and Jacob Black came in. Jacob was a tall, well built, Native American man with short black hair and black eyes. He looked odd to me in this black suit and tie. He normally wore jeans and t-shirts with grease stains on them from his long hours at his garage. He settled in the witness stand. Once the bailiff had sworn him in, Rose went over and stood in front of him.

"State your name for the record, please," she said.

"Jacob Black," he said.

"Mr. Black, you and you wife, Leah, live across the street from the house that the defendant and his wife, is that correct?" asked Rose.

"Yes, ma'am," said Jacob. "They moved in about a year after Leah and I did."

"What kind of neighbors were they?" asked Rose.

"Loud. We would hear Mr. Newton screaming and yelling at Mrs. Newton all the time. Sometimes she would scream back but not very often. They mostly kept to themselves. We hardly ever saw Mrs. Newton out of the house. If we did, it was usually only for a minute or two at a time," explained Jacob.

"Can you please tell us about the events on the evening of May the nineteenth?" asked Rose.

"Leah and I had just sat down for dinner when we heard screaming coming from the Newton's house. At first, we figured they were just fighting again but then we heard a loud crash. Leah and I ran to the front door and found Mr. Newton in the middle of the street, sitting on top of his wife. He hit her in the face before he got up and started dragging her out of the street by her hair. I told Leah to call the police before I ran over and pulled him off her. He swung at me but I managed to duck and hit him. I took him to the ground and held him down while another neighbor, Cory Shields, came over to help. The police showed up about five minutes later, followed by the ambulance," explained Jacob.

"When Mr. Newton was dragging his wife off, did he say anything?" asked Rose.

"Yes, he said he had enough of her and he was going to make sure nobody would ever find her," said Jacob.

I felt Charlie reach over and grab my hand. I looked up at him. He was staring at me with tears in his eyes. He reached over and wiped the tears off my face, gently. I leaned into his hand and closed my eyes. I felt Charlie's lips on the top of my head before I opened my eyes and returned my attention to Rose and Jacob.

"After you pulled Mr. Newton off of his wife, did he say anything?" asked Rose.

"He said…" Jacob trailed off shaking his head. "He said I should have a go at her. He said she's a good whore who…who would make sure I felt good."

"Anything else?" asked Rose.

"He said that she wasn't worth the air she was breathing and that one way or another he was going to make sure she ended up dead," said Jacob, clearing his throat.

"No further questions, your honor," said Rose before returning back to her seat.

"Mr. Carter, do you have any questions for the witness?" asked the judge.

"Just a few your honor," said Gregory, standing up. "Mr. Black, you claim that you and your wife heard the defendant and his wife fighting a lot over the past six years, is that correct?"

"Yes," said Jacob.

"Why didn't you ever call the police?" asked Gregory.

"Because we didn't think it was anything physical," said Jacob. "We thought they were just yelling and screaming at each other. I guess, we were wrong."

"Mr. Black, on the evening of the alleged attack, had you been drinking?" asked Gregory.

"I had had a beer when I got home from work, but only one," said Jacob.

"No further questions," said Gregory. He returned to his table and sat down next to Mike.

"You may step down, Mr. Black," said the judge. Jacob stood up and walked past us. He smiled softly at me before he took his seat in the back of the courtroom. "Ms. Hale, call your next witness."

"I call Leah Black," said Rose.

The doors at the back of the courtroom opened once more. Leah Black, a stunningly beautiful woman with long black hair and eyes, came in and took her place on the witness stand. She had the most beautiful russet colored skin. The bailiff swore her in and Rose stood up and went up to her.

"State your name for the record, please," said Rose.

"Leah Black."

"Mrs. Black, what do you do for a living?" asked Rose.

"I'm a nurse in the emergency room at Chicago General hospital," said Leah.

"On the evening of May the nineteenth, you tended to Mrs. Newton while your husband, Jacob, restrained Mr. Newton. Is that correct?" asked Rose.

"Yes," said Leah.

"What can you tell about the condition that Mrs. Newton was in?" asked Rose.

"She had a broken nose, a busted lip, and several bruises already popping up on her face and arms. She had hit her head on the ground and had a large knot forming. I was checking her for injuries when I found… when I found the old bruises. Her back was covered in them as were her legs. Some of them were fresh. I could tell some of them were days, if not weeks, old," explained Leah. "Mrs. Newton has passed out so I couldn't question her about the bruises. The ambulance showed up and we loaded her up and took her to the hospital."

"Did you ride with her?" asked Rose.

"Yes, I thought she might be more comfortable with someone with her, if she woke up, but she didn't," said Leah.

"Thank you, Mrs. Black," said Rose. "No further questions."

"Mr. Carter, do you have any questions for this witness?" asked the judge.

"No, your honor," said Gregory.

"Very well," said the judge. "Mrs. Black, please step down."

Leah climbed off the witness stand and joined her husband in the back of the courtroom. The judge looked back over at Rose.

"Call your next witness."

"I call Dr. James Sanders," said Rose.

The doors to the courtroom opened, one more time as James Sanders came in. He was a tall, thin man with dirty blond hair and steely grey eyes. He took his seat on the witness stand after he was sworn in. Rose stood up and face him.

"State your name for the record, please," said Rose.

"I'm Dr. James Sanders," said James, crossing his legs.

"Dr. Sanders, you are an attending in the emergency room of Chicago General, is that correct?" asked Rose.

"Yes, ma'am," said James.

"On the evening of May the nineteenth, you were the physician who treated Mrs. Newton when the ambulance brought her in, is that correct?" asked Rose.

"Yes, ma'am," said James, again.

"Can you tell us what you found?" asked Rose.

"Mrs. Newton came in with a broken nose, severe concussion, and a cracked rib. Upon doing x-rays, I found that she had had several breaks in the past, not all of them had healed properly. Her body was covered in contusions, some of them were weeks old. There were hand marks around her neck where someone had tried to strangle her," explained James.

"How many breaks would you guess she's suffered?" asked Rose.

"At least ten," said James. "After seeing that, I did some digging and found that she had been seen in our ER at least three times before, all of which she suffered a concussion. Once she had a broken arm and the other two she had laceration, once on her forehead and the other on her arm."

"Why were these never reported to the police?" asked Rose.

"Mrs. Newton was seen by three different ER doctors. When she broke her arm, the chart said she had claimed to fallen down the stairs. When she but her forehead, the chart said she had claimed to have hit her head on an open cabinet. When she came in with a cut on her arm, she claimed that she had tripped and cut her arm on the side of metal table," explained James.

"Thank you," said Rose. "No further questions."

"Mr. Carter," said the judge.

"Dr. Sanders, if the Mrs. Newton came in with so many injuries, why wouldn't the other doctors have reported it to the police?" asked Gregory.

"I don't know. There were nearly nine months between her first two visits, and nearly a year and a half in between her second and third visits. It's not uncommon for abused woman to try to cover up the abuse by going to different hospital, Mr. Carter," said James.

"And you're an expert on abused woman, are you?" asked Gregory.

"I won't say that I am an expect, Mr. Carter, but I have done been in the ER for many years. I've seen my fair share of abused woman, children, even the a handful of men. All of them come in carrying the guilt of what their abusers did to them," smirked James.

"When Mrs. Newton woke up in the hospital, did she tell you that her husband had been abusing her?" asked Gregory, ignoring the last remarks by James.

"No," said James. "She refused to speak to me at all."

"No further questions, your honor," smirked Gregory.

"You may step down, Dr. Sanders," said the judge. "Ms. Hale, do you have any more witnesses?"

"No, your honor, the prosecution rests," said Rose.

"Very well. We will break for lunch and re-convene at one o'clock," said the judge. "Mr. Carter, be prepared to start your case."


	14. Chapter 14

Fourteen

By the time we re-entered the courtroom, we were all tense. Lunch had been awkward, silent, and uncomfortable. I knew that nobody was really sure what to say or what to do. Even though I knew that all of them knew about the abuse, none of them truly understood the years of hell I lived through. Of course, I never told them either but how do you tell the ones you love about the man who tortured you?

"Mr. Carter, call your first witness," said the judge, shaking me out of my thoughts.

"I call Karen Newton," said Gregory, standing up.

Karen Newton stood up and looked over at me before she went up to the witness stand. I had never cared for that bitch. She was rude, hateful, arrogant. I suppose that it where Mike got his attitude from. Once she had been sworn in, she turned her attention to Gregory.

"State your name for the record, please," said Gregory.

"Karen Slaton Newton," she said.

"Mrs. Newton, have you ever seen your son hit his wife?" asked Gregory.

"No," said Karen. Even from my seat, I could see her roll her eyes. "I saw her attack him numerous times, though."

"Please explain."

"At Christmas last years ago, she was unhappy with the sweater he gave her. She slapped him and called him an idiot before tossing the sweater into the fireplace," said Karen.

I shook my head as I looked down at my head. She was making shit up. Christmas last year had been spent here in Chica

go because Mike had beaten me so badly for breaking his favorite ornament that I couldn't walk for nearly a week. He told his parents that I was sick with the flu and we had to stay home.

"Any other times?" asked Gregory.

"Several," said Karen, almost smirking. "She would scream at him for every little thing. If he ever talked back to her, she would hit him. His father and I tried to get him to leave her but he was afraid."

"No further questions, your honor," said Gregory, sitting down.

"Ms. Hale," said the judge. Rose stood up and looked up at Karen.

"Mrs. Newton, you claim to have seen Isabella attack your son last Christmas, is that correct?" asked Rose.

"Yes," snapped Karen. Rose moved around the table and up to her.

"You and your husband live in California, isn't that also correct?" asked Rose.

"Yes," said Karen.

"If they were in California with you at Christmas last year, then how could Isabella have been seen in the ER at Chicago Memorial Hospital on the same day?" asked Rose.

"I don't know," muttered Karen.

"I'm sorry, I didn't quite hear that," said Rose, heatedly.

"I don't know," repeated Karen, much louder this time. "Maybe I have the years confused."

"Ok, so what year was it?" asked Rose, shoving the papers in her hand into Karen's Newton's hands. "The year before last where she was treated in the ER for burns to her legs and arms. Or perhaps the one before that were she was admitted to the hospital with a broken ankle and a head fracture?"

"I…I don't know," stammered Karen.

"Isn't it true, Mrs. Newton, that you've never seen your daughter-in-law abusing your son?" asked Rose.

"No, I have," insisted Karen.

"Have you ever witnessed your son striking his wife, Mrs. Newton?" asked Rose.

"No," gasped Karen.

"So in September of last year, while your son and daughter-in-law were visiting you, you didn't walk in to his bedroom and found him spanking his wife with his belt?" asked Rose.

"I…no, of course not," muttered Karen.

"So you didn't take Isabella to the ER at Mercy General in Los Angeles on September the fourth of last year, where she was treated to cuts to on her back from where the belt's metal spikes cut into her?" asked Rose.

"Yes, I took her to the ER but-"

"No further questions," said Rose, heading back to her seat.

"You may step down, Mrs. Newton," ordered the judge.

Karen Newton made her way back to her seat. Her husband moved to place his arm around her shoulder but she shrugged him off. I saw the hurt and pain in his eyes. He looked over at me and I swear I saw the smallest amount of sorrow before he turned away.

"Call your next witness, Mr. Carter," said the judge, pulling my attention back to him.

"I call David Newton to the stand," said Gregory.

David Newton made his way up to the stand. Once he was sworn in, he turned his attention to Gregory, but not before sparing me a look first.

"State your name for the record, please," said Gregory.

"David Newton," said David.

"Mr. Newton, have you ever witnessed your daughter-in-law abusing your son?" asked Gregory.

"I…" David trailed off as he looked over at his son. I followed his gaze and saw Mike glaring at his father. David took a deep breath and looked over at me. "No, I haven't."

"In your statement, you told me that you saw Isabella Newton strike your son repeatedly," said Gregory.

"I lied," said David Newton. I could feel the tears building up in my eyes as he looked over at me. "I never saw Isabella hit anyone. However, I did see my son hit her several times over the years."

"Your honor, I moved that David Newton's testimony be stricken from the record," demanded Gregory.

"Denied," said the judge.

"No further questions," muttered Gregory.

"Ms. Hale," said the judge, with a small smile playing on his lips.

"Mr. Newton, you said that you've seen your son hit your daughter-in-law several times over the years, is that correct?" asked Rose.

"Yes, ma'am," said David, letting a tear fall down his face.

"Please explain?" asked Rose.

"The first time I saw him hit her was just after they were married. They were in the kitchen and she accidentally dropped a plate, breaking it. Mike slammed her against the wall and slapped her."

"Why didn't you stop him?" asked Rose.

"I was afraid," said David. He took a deep, shaky breath as he looked over at his wife. "I know what it's like to be on the receiving end and…I was afraid of what would happen if I interfered."

"Mr. Newton, who were afraid of?" asked Rose.

"My wife," whispered David.

"You bastard," screamed Karen, springin up. "How could you?'

"Mrs. Newton, that's enough," bellowed the judge. She stopped speaking but didn't sit down. The Judge turned to David. "Mr. Newton, are you saying that your wife has been abusive towards you?"

"Yes, your honor," said David, shakily.

"Ms. Hale, do you have any more questions?" asked the judge.

"No, your honor," said Rose.

"Very well. Mr. Newton you may step down. I highly suggest you do some serious thinking about your life, sir."

"I already am, your honor," said David. He climbed off the stand and headed back to us. He stopped at the end of the row were I was sitting. "I'm sorry I didn't…"

"Me too," I murmured.

David nodded his head before he walked out of the courtroom. I wiped the tears off my face as I looked back at the front of the courtroom. I wasn't entirely sure what had just happened here.

"Mr. Carter, do you have any more witnesses?" asked the judge, dryly. Gregory hesitated as he looked down at Mike, who was whispering furiously to him. "Mr. Carter!"

"Yes, your honor," sighed Gregory. "I call Mike Newton to the stand."

Mike stood up and practically strutted up to the witness stand. He sat down and looked around, locking his eyes on mine. I swear the normal smirk on his face grew as he stared at me. The bailiff came over and swore him in. Mike turned his attention to his lawyer, who looked flustered.

"State your name for the record, please," said Gregory.

"Michael Newton."

"Mr. Newton, tell me about that night of May the nineteenth," said Gregory.

"We had just come home from the ER after my wife suffered complications to the abortion she had received earlier that day," said Mike, looking right at me. "We walked into the kitchen when she grabbed a butcher knife out of the drawer and tried to stab me. I had no choice but to defend myself, as I have had to do multiple times over the years. I managed to get the knife away from her but she started hitting me, scratching me. I ran out of the house, but she ran after me. She tackled me in the street and started hitting me again. I panicked and hit her back. I was trying to pull her out of the middle of the road when our neighbors came over. Jacob Black tried to rip my wife's shirt open so he could rape her but I stopped him. He held me down while his wife, Leah, proceeded to molest her."

"You said that you've had to defend yourself against your wife's attacks before," said Gregory. "Can you explain what you meant?"

"My wife is unstable. She suffers from bouts of severe depression, maniac episodes, and violent outburst. I've been trying to get her to go see someone but she refused. I love Isabella, but I couldn't stand to let her hurt me anymore."

"When did the abuse start, Mr. Newton?" asked Gregory.

"Right after we were married," said Mike. "Isabella had just gotten off the phone with her father, who berated her every chance he got, and she was upset. I tried to comfort her but she screamed at me to leave her alone. She slapped me and dug her nails into my skin. I was so shocked. I didn't know what to do. She apologized afterwards but the abuse escalated over the next few years."

"Why didn't you leave?" asked Gregory.

"I was foolish enough to think that she would stop, that if I was just behaved the way she wanted me to that she would stop. I love her."

"No further questions, your honor," said Gregory. He went over and practically fell into his chair.

"Ms. Hale," said the judge.

"Mr. Newton, so you are claiming that your wife was the abuser in your relationship, is that correct?" asked Rose.

"Yes," said Mike, harshly.

"How many trips to the ER did you have to make from the injuries you received?" asked Rose.

"None," said Mike. "It was mostly bruises."

"Mostly bruises," mused Rose, going over to her table. She turned back to Mike. "I have dozens of reports from area hospitals that saw your wife after you beat her. She had more than bruises, Mr. Newton. Isn't it true that you took great pride in beating your wife?"

"No," said Mike, loudly. "I love her."

"Yet, you broke her arm with a baseball bat and you threatened to burn her face with an iron. How about the time that you tied her to a chair in the basement and left her down there for three day?" asked Rose. "She had to be hospitalized because she was dehydrated."

"I did no such thing," muttered Mike.

"Really?" asked Rose. "So what about the night of January 18, 2005 when you pushed her out of your car and made her walk the two miles back home in the snow with no coat on?"

"She…" trailed off Mike. I could see him getting madder and madder. "She jumped out of the car. I tried to get her to get back in but she refused."

"Mr. Newton on the night of the nineteenth of May, you claim that your wife tried to stab you, is that correct?" asked Rose.

"Yes," said Mike. "But I was able to fight her off."

"Did she hit you at all?" asked Rose.

"She kicked me in the chest and hit me several times in the face," said Mike.

"Did she break your rib?" asked Rose.

"No," said Mike.

"Give you a black eyes, bust your nose, anything?" asked Rose.

"No," said Mike, sharply.

"In fact, she didn't hurt you at all, did she, Mr. Newton?" asked Rose.

"Yes, she did," snapped Mike.

"Yet, she was the one with the broken nose, busted lips, black eyes, cracked ribs, bruised neck," said Rose. "You claim that she was the abuser in your relationship, yet she's the one who had been in and out of the ER more than a dozen times in the last six years, Mr. Newton. You have never been in there once. How do you explain that?"

"I defended myself," said Mike.

"In order to defend yourself you had to break her arm?" asked Rose.

"No, but-"

"Did you have to whip her with a belt so hard that it left imprints on her back?" asked Rose, shoving the pictures from the hospital in LA into Mike's hands.

"No, but-"

"No further questions, your honor," said Rose, ripping the picture from Mike's hand.

"Fucking bitch," muttered Mike. Rose stopped about half way to her seat and looked back at him.

"Mr. Newton, apologize to Ms. Hale, now," ordered the judge.

"I'm sorry," muttered Mike, gritting his teeth together.

"You may step down," growled the judge. Rose took her seat at her table while Mike returned to his. "Mr. Carter, do you have any other witnesses?"

"No, your honor," said Gregory, ignoring the muttering coming from Mike.

"Very well, we will re-convene in the morning at nine to begin closing arguments," ordered the judge, banging his gavel.

The judge left the courtroom followed very closely by the guards as they dragged Mike out. Karen Newton stormed out and I was afraid of what she might do to her husband. Hopefully, he would be ok. Gregory came over to Rose.

"Any chance of a deal?" he asked, dryly.

"No chance in hell," snapped Rose. "He called me a bitch. While I may be one, no man ever gets to call me one and get deal."

"Didn't think so," sighed Gregory, shaking his head. His eyes fell on me before he turned and left the courtroom.

"Well, today was a good day," said Rose, looking back at me.

"If you say so," I muttered.

"Bella, I know it's hard, I really do, but it's going to be ok," said Rose, rubbing my arm.

"You can't know that," I whispered.

"Well, let's head back to the hotel," said Esme.

Twenty minutes later, we were back at the hotel. I headed straight up to my room and changed while everyone else went into the restaurant for dinner. I was laying on my bed when the door to the hotel opened. I looked over and saw Charlie come in with a bag.

"I got you a cheeseburger," he said, placing the bag on the bed.

"Thanks," I muttered, sitting up. I pulled the burger out of the bag and took a bit.

"Why didn't you leave?" asked Charlie, sitting down on his bed.

"I don't know," I whispered, laying the burger back down. "At first, he would apologize for hurting me and I thought he would stop. Then he told me that I was making him do it, that I was stupid, that I was lazy, that I had no place to go. I believed him."

"You were always welcomed at my house, Honey," cried Charlie. "Always."

"I was ashamed, Daddy," I sobbed, pulling my knees up. "I mean, if I had just been smarter, a better wife, a better person, I wouldn't have gone through all that."

"Honey, you are not to blame for anything he did," cried Charlie, pulling me into his lap. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me tight. "Everything he did, he did because he was an asshole. He did it to make himself feel better, look better. None of it was your fault."

I held onto Charlie, sobbing into his shirt. Letting my father hold me, comfort me, take care of me. In so many ways, I think he needed to do this for me, for himself. Charlie held me in his arms as I cried myself to sleep.


	15. Chapter 15

Fifteen

ESPOV

Sighing, I looked over at the clock. Two in the morning. Carlisle was sleeping silently next to me. How I longed for the ease of a peaceful slumber. I slipped out of bed and out of our hotel room. I had always had a hard time sleeping in hotels. Then you add how worried I am about Bella, and it makes it nearly impossible for me to be able to sleep.

I made my way down to the lobby and settled onto one of the couches. I flipped through the channels on the television, looking for anything that would occupy my attention, even if it was only for a moment, but there was nothing on but stupid infomercials. I tossed the remote onto one of the tables and brought my knees up.

As I sat there on the floral couch, I couldn't help but think about Renee. What would she do to help her Bella right now? Renee would have known that something was wrong all those years that Bella didn't come back, all those phone calls that were off, the emails that were short and vague. Renee would have been able to read her daughter like a book.

I can't imagine what the last six years had been like for Bella. Living everyday in hell, being afraid to say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing, look at that bastard the wrong way. It's no wonder she's so quiet, so skittish, so broken right now. She's been through so much. How were we ever going to see how much she means to all of us?

I heard someone behind me and turned. Bella was standing there, sad and lonely. Her once bright eyes were dull and blank. She had her bottom lip pulled in between her teeth, chewing on it. She looked uncertain on whether she should be here or not.

"What are you doing awake?" I asked, patting the couch next to me. Bella didn't say anything as she slowly made her way around and sat down next to me.

"I couldn't go back to sleep," she muttered.

"Hmm, me either," I sighed, looking back at the TV. "I've never been one of those parents who slept good while their child was hurting."

"I'm sure Edward, Alice, and Emmett are fine," Bella said, pulling her knees up. Almost protectively. Did she think I would hurt her?

"I wasn't talking about them, Sweetheart. I was referring to you," I clarified. Bella turned away so that she wasn't looking at me anymore. "But I guess you don't see yourself as mine."

"I do," Bella whispered, staring at the floor.

"You do?" I asked, reaching over and pulling her face around so she could look at me. "I wasn't sure you did."

"I'm not sure what I am supposed to say to you, Esme," Bella said, softly.

"Well, how about 'Hello, Esme, I feel like complete shit today, and I really need someone to talk to.' I'd be good with that," I smiled. Bella shook her head and looked away.

"You don't want to hear how I'm feeling, Esme," she said, sadly. "Besides, it's bad enough that you all feel sorry for me."

"You're right, we do feel sorry for you," I sighed. Bella looked back over at me. "How could we not feel sorry for you when you've been through so much, Sweetheart?"

"I don't want your pity," she muttered, acidly . "I don't want all of you looking at me, thinking about…everything he did to me. That's why I didn't want you to come. I…"

"Too damn bad, Bella," I grumbled, shaking her head. I turned so that I was facing her. "Do you really think that since the moment we found out there was abuse, that we haven't been imagining what he had done to you? Bella, all we want to do is help you, be there for you, hold you when you need someone to hold you."

"Why?" Bella asked. "I don't deserve it. I stayed with him for six years, Esme, while he beat me, burned me, spit on. I was nothing more than a plaything for him."

"Because we love you," I simply stated, bringing my hand up to her face. "Sweetheart, do you think that just because you were scared to leave, that we would stop loving you?"

"You should have," she muttered.

"No, we should not have," I said, wrapping my arm around her shoulder. Bella leaned into my embrace and laid her head on my shoulder. "Maybe we don't know what it felt like to be treated like shit for years, Bella. Maybe we don't know the guilt you feel or the shame, but we will never, ever stop loving you. Carlisle, Charlie, and I are always here for you. Emmett, Alice, and Jasper are always here for you. Edward is always here for you. Especially Edward."

Neither Bella nor I said anything else as we watched the silly infomercial. The things people buy anymore. Eventually, we made our way back up to our rooms. I hugged her before she stepped back into the room she was sharing with Charlie. I went into mine and Carlisle's room. He was sitting on the side of the bed, stretching. I smiled as I saw his t-shirt rise up and expose the smallest amount of his stomach.

"Morning, my darling," I smiled. I went over and sat on the bed next to him. "Did you sleep good?"

"Except for missing you," he murmured, bringing his lips down onto my neck. "You know I sleep better with you next to me."

"I do," I whispered. I turned and caught his lips with mine. "I missed you, too."

"Did you end up downstairs again?" asked Carlisle, wrapping his arm around my waist.

"Yes," I murmured. "Bella came down. We talked a little bit."

"That's good," smiled Carlisle. "We have to try to make her feel comfortable with us."

"I know," I sighed, shaking my head. "I just hate seeing her so sad all the time."

"I do too, my love, but she's going to move past this," said Carlisle. I shook my head as I stood up.

"That's what you said about Edward," I sighed, pulling out my clothes from my suitcase. "It's been over a year and he's still as distant as he always was."

"He's coming around," chuckled Carlisle, grabbing his own clothes. "Or do you not notice the way he is with Bella?"

"Of course I do," I smiled, looking over at my husband. "But do you think they will ever see what has been obvious to the rest of us since they were kids?"

"Yes, I do," murmured Carlisle, wrapping his arms around me. "Eventually. Now, what do you say to a little shower?"

"I think that sounds lovely," I whispered.

An hour later, Carlisle and I had showered, dressed, and were in the lobby waiting for the others to join us. Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Charlie were the first to arrive followed by Edward and Bella a few minutes later. He was leaned over whispering something to her that had her smiling and laughing.

"You are really twisted, Edward," laughed Bella, snorting slightly.

"I know," snickered Edward, shaking his head. "But it's true."

"Oh, I believe you," smiled Bella.

"What's so funny?" asked Alice, pouting.

"Nothing," muttered Edward and Bella, exchanging a look between them.

"Let's grab some breakfast, shall we?" I asked before Alice could push the issue further.

"Fine," huffed Alice.

We made our way into the restaurant and took our seats in the back. Edward and Bella were sitting at the far end of the table. Charlie smiled softly as he looked at his daughter and my son. Our waitress came over and took our order. I sat back and watched Bella and Edward as they leaned into each other, whispering furiously.

It's been a long time since I have seen my son smile this much. When he moved back to Clarendon last year, he was so withdrawn that I could barely get two words out of him. All he would tell us was that he and that little bitch, Jessica, had split up. I wasn't sure what she had done to him, but she had broken him. For days, he stayed in his room, wallowing away. Carlisle and I weren't sure what to do for him. Every time we tried to talk to him, he told us he was fine.

After a few weeks, he bought his house and moved out. He got his job at the college and went on pretending everything was fine. He never came over, never called. Emmett and Alice said that they never saw him. They said they would call him and invite him over but he always had an excuse on why he couldn't come. I was so worried about my son. He's never been the most open person and now, he's even more closed off. Except with Bella. She seemed to have the same effect on him as he does on her. They trust each other, care about each other. As I look at the two of them sitting at the other end of the table next to each other, I'm pretty sure they love each other, too.

"That's my bacon, woman," laughed Edward, trying to get the bacon Bella had snatched off his plate back.

"It's mine now, sucker," snickered Bella, stuffing into her mouth. "It's so good."

"That's mean," pouted Edward. "So damn mean."

"You'll get over it," smiled Bella.

"I don't know about that, Bella," said Emmett, winking at her. "He has a tendency to hold grudges. Or do you not remember when Alice knocked over the tower he had made out of Lego's when he was like ten."

"That wasn't me," scoffed Alice. "That was you, you dumb ass. You thought it be funny and then tried to blame it on me."

"What?" gasped Emmett, innocently. "I would never do that to my little sister."

"Whatever," laughed me, Carlisle, Charlie, Edward, Bella, and Alice.

"That hurts," said Emmett, looking around at all of us. "Seriously, that cuts deep."

"I'm pretty sure you will survive for your wounds, Emmett," snorted Bella, shaking her head.

"I don't think I will, Bella," sighed Emmett, leaning back in his seat. "My wounds are deep. There is no hope for me."

"Oh really?" asked Bella, cocking her eyebrow at my oldest son. "Huh, I guess that's too bad then. I'm sure there is someone out there who would miss you."

"Someone?" asked Emmett, looking down at his plate. "I doubt that."

"Trust me, Em," smiled Bella. He looked up at her, blushing. My son was blushing.

"Who?" asked Alice, eagerly.

"Well, we should get going," said Edward, standing up. Emmett sighed in relief and stood up.

"Yeah, we, um, should go," muttered Emmett. "Big day today."

"I want to know who Bella was talking about," whined Alice, standing up.

"I was talking about me, Alice," lied Bella. I could see the lie written on her face. "I would miss him."

"Oh," said Alice, narrowing her eyes at Bella. "I don't believe you but I'm willing to let it go….for now."

"And they say miracles don't happen," mumbled Emmett.

Either Alice didn't hear him or she was really going to let it go because, instead of smarting off to him, she headed out of the restaurant. The rest of us followed her out and climbed into a few cabs. Twenty minutes later, we pulled up in front of the courthouse. We headed inside and found Rosalie pacing back and forth in front of the courtroom. She looked up at us as we came up to her. There was a look in her eye that I didn't understand and I wasn't sure I liked it.

"Hey, Rose," said Bella, softly. "Are…are you ok?"

"Bella, I…" she trailed off, shaking her head. "Bella, they found Mike in his cell this morning….dead."


	16. Chapter 16

Sixteen

BPOV

Dead. My good-for-nothing husband was dead. The son of a bitch, who had spent years torturing me, beating me, enjoying every moment of pain he gave me, was dead. I couldn't quite process that. I stared at Rose, trying to grasp those few little words. He was actually dead.

"Bella?" asked Edward, placing his hand on my shoulder. I looked over at him. "Are you ok?"

"Dead," I muttered. "He's really dead?"

"Yes, he's dead," said Edward. I shook my head as I turned around and headed out of the courthouse. "Bella, where are you going?"

"I'm leaving," I muttered. Edward grabbed my arm, gently, pulling me to a stop. I looked back at him as everyone came up on us. "Please, let me go."

"You're scaring me," whispered Edward.

"He's dead, Edward," I whispered. "He's never going to know how I felt. He's never going to suffer at all for what he did to me."

"I know," murmured Edward, pulling me into his arms.

I wrapped my arms around him as I cried. I'm not even sure why I was crying over that bastard at all. They weren't the tears of a grieving widow. They were the angry tears of somehow who had been hurt, betrayed, lied to. I was angry and pissed off. I was scared because I should feel relieved that he was gone, relieved that he could no longer hurt me but I wasn't relieved. Simply put, I was pissed the fuck off.

"What the hell happened?" asked Charlie.

"We aren't sure," said Rose. "Mike was found in his cell this morning, beaten to death. Nobody is sure who the person was, or how they got into his cell to beat him the way they did. He had been beaten pretty severely."

"Good," I muttered. "He deserves it."

"Bella, they went to arrest Karen Newton this morning on assault charges for the abuse to her husband. They found David Newton, beaten. Karen was no where to be seen," said Rose. I pulled away from Edward and looked over at her.

"She tried to kill him?" I asked.

"It would appear so," said Rose.

"Which hospital is he in?" I asked.

"Chicago General," sighed Rose. "I don't think you should go."

"Why not?" I asked, heatedly. "He's alone. He's probably terrified."

"He didn't do anything for you when you were alone and terrified," said Rose, harshly.

"Because he was scared," I snapped. "I thought you understood, Rose. You told me you understood."

"I do, Bella," sighed Rose. I saw Emmett's eyes widen slightly. "Which is why I'm not sure you are ready to go see him."

"I won't leave here without seeing him," I yelled. "He stood up to his abuser and tried to do the right thing and help me. I will not abandon him now."

I pulled out of Edward's arms and ran out of the courthouse. He caught up to me just as I was fixing to step into a cab. Edward smiled at me as he held the door open for me. I climbed in and he climbed in after me. I told the driver where to go.

Ten minutes later, he let us out in front of the hospital. Edward and I made our way inside. Stopping at the information desk to get David's room number, we made our up to the fifth floor. Taking a deep breath, I pushed open his hospital room. He looked over at me and frowned. His face was covered in bruises. His right arm was in a cast and based on the bulk from under the covers, so was his left leg. Edward shut the door behind us.

"Wow, you look like shit," I muttered.

"I'm sure I do," said David, looking away. "Who's your friend?"

"This is Edward," I said. "He's been there for me when I…He's my friend."

"I should have stopped him," muttered David, shaking his head.

"I'm going to wait outside, Bella," whispered Edward. I looked over at him. "Ok?"

"Ok," I whispered. Edward left and I looked back at David. "I guess you've heard about Mike."

"Yeah, they, um, called us this morning. Kind of what set her off," mumbled David.

"Oh," I muttered.

"I was a horrible father, Bella," said David. He kept his face turned toward the window. "I should have been stronger than I was. I should never have stayed in that house with her. I should never have let my son grow up to be such a monster."

"But you did," I muttered, harshly. I went over and looked out the window. "Why did you stay with her for so long?"

"I didn't think I had a choice," sighed David. I turned and looked over at him. "When we were first married, she was sweet, kind, funny. It wasn't until we had been married a few months that I saw the real her. She could turn on you faster than you wouldn't believe. The first time she hit me, I hadn't bought the right brand of salad dressing at the store. She called me an idiot and slapped me. I was shocked because my wife, who I loved, hit me. She broke down, sobbing about how sorry she was. I should have left then but I was a fool."

"Me too," I mumbled.

"It wasn't a month later that she hit me again. Slowly, the attacks became more and more frequent. They got worse and worse yet I stayed with her. I never fought back. I let her hurt me because I was convinced that she loved me. I was convinced that I still loved her. Besides, nobody would have believed that my wife was abusing me. When she found out she was pregnant, she wasn't happy about it, Bella. She wanted to get an abortion. I begged her not to kill my baby. I swore that I would take care of him, that she wouldn't have to do anything. She agreed. Mike was born and for the first year, everything was great. Then she started telling me that I wasn't raising him properly. I was smothering him, I was coddling him too much. She said she was going to make sure she raised a strong son, someone who wasn't weak like I was. I let her. I let her turn our son against me, turn him into a monster. When I saw him hit you that first time, I…I wanted to tell you to run. I wanted to tell you to leave but I knew that if I did that they would come after me. I was weak."

"You were scared," I whispered.

"That's no excuse for letting my son abuse you, Bella," cried David. I sighed as I went over and sat down on the side of his bed. I grabbed his good hand in mine. "I am so sorry that I wasn't stronger."

"I wasn't strong enough, either," I said, blinking back my tears. "I didn't see the way she treated you. I was too wrapped up in my own hell that I didn't see what you were going through."

"I didn't let you see," said David. "Much like you didn't let your family see. It's obvious how much they love you, Bella. I know it's hard but you have to let them help you. Find your happiness and put my son, and us, behind you."

"What are you going to do now?" I asked.

"I don't know," he said, frowning. "Start over someplace new, someplace where she can't find me."

"You're welcome to come back to Texas with us," I suggested.

"No, I'm not," smiled David. "Your father wouldn't welcome me there and neither should you. Last thing you need is a reminder of Mike around you."

"Suppose you have a point," I sighed, looking around. "Will I ever see you again?"

"Probably not," muttered David. I frowned and looked back at him. "Don't be sad for me, Bella. I'm going to be fine. After thirty-two years of marriage, I'm getting a fresh start."

"Don't waste it," I said, softly. "It's not easy."

"I won't," he said. "Bella…thank you for coming by. It means a lot to me. I don't deserve your kindness."

"We all deserve a second chance," I smiled, softly. "Take care of yourself."

"You too," he said, softly.

I leaned over and kissed his cheek before I stood up and walked out of his hospital room. Edward was leaning against the wall next to the door, looking down at the pale, white, hospital floor. I let the door shut behind me and leaned against the wall next to him. Hooking my arm through his, I leaned my head on his shoulder.

"Nice talk?" he asked, softly.

"Yes and no," I said. "I never saw it. I never saw the hell he went through."

"He didn't want you to," said Edward, leaning his head on top of mine.

"Maybe," I whispered.

Edward slipped his hand down into mine as we headed down to the elevator. We stepped off in the lobby and managed to catch a cab. I laid my head on Edward's shoulder as we rode back to the hotel. Today had been an incredibly long day already and it was barely lunch time. The cab pulled up in front of the hotel about twenty minutes later. Edward and I climbed out and headed inside. We saw Charlie, Carlisle, Esme, Jasper, Alice, Emmett, and Rose sitting inside the restaurant.

Sharing a look with Edward, we headed inside. The seven of them looked up at us and frowned. I supposed maybe they were getting tired of me running off like that all the time but they didn't understand that I needed to see him. I needed to talk to him, to tell him that I understood. He needed to know that I understood his pain. Edward and I settled in a couple of empty seats at the end of the long tables.

"About a month before my mother…died," I started, already feeling the tears building up in my eyes. "She took me to Amarillo for what she called a girl's day. We went shopping at the mall, got our hair done, manicures, and pedicures. Even though I hated all that shit, I had best day with her. She took me to lunch at The Plaza because she knew it was my favorite place to eat. I told her that I had fun. She smiled and said 'today was definitely the best day ever.' I miss her so much. Everyday I wake up and the first thing I think of is how she would be so disappointed that I let him hurt me. The thing is I know she would be."

"Bella…" trailed off Charlie, shaking his head. "She wouldn't want you to sit there and let that bastard win."

"It's that easy, is it?" asked Edward, placing his arm on the back of my chair. "Just get over it already. Move on. Pretend it didn't happen."

"I know it's not easy, Edward," said Charlie, harshly. "I lost my wife and I damn near lost my daughter."

"I lost you when Momma died, Dad," I whispered, shaking my head. "For months, you barely looked at me. You threw yourself into your job. I spent more time with Carlisle than I did with you. I needed you, Daddy, and you weren't there."

"I was doing the best I could, Bella," said Charlie, thickly. "I didn't know what to do. They don't tell you how to handle losing the love of your life."

"Nobody told me how to handle being told that I was nothing, that I was a whore, a bitch, a slut. Being told that I was worthless and a waste of space," I cried.

"Bella, stop," said Edward.

"No, Edward," I cried, harder. "They wanted to come and help. They wanted to be here to support me. They should know about every night that I would go to bed, praying that the next day I wouldn't fuck up, that I wouldn't do something to be punished over. EVERY FUCKING DAY!"

"You could have left," said Esme, looking up at me.

"You make it sound so easy," I murmured.

"I know it wasn't easy, Bella, but you still could have left," said Esme.

"I tried," I whispered, pulling my knees up into my chest. "About a year after we were married, Mike had been drinking and he, um…well, he was really rough. When he passed out, I somehow gathered the strength to pack a bag and leave. I went to a hotel and got a room for the night. When I headed back out to my car the next morning, he was waiting for me. He didn't say anything as he grabbed my arm and dragged me into his car. He drove us back home, still without saying anything. He parked the car in the garage and came around to my side and pulled me out of the car. He dragged me into the house and down to the basement. He then tied my hands together and hooked them over a hook that was hanging from the ceiling. He ripped my shirt off and got an extension cord and proceeded to strike me with it over and over and over again. I screamed. I begged him to stop but he kept going. He told me that if I ever left him again, that not only would he kill me but he would kill you, Daddy. He left there all day and all night. So don't tell me that I could have just left."

I pushed away from the table and headed up to my room, leaving them all sitting there with tears falling down their faces. Trying to hold in my own tears, I stumbled down the hall until I reached my room. I barely got the door open before I collapsed on the floor, letting my tears rocket through my body. The last thing I remember before darkness completely took me over was Edward lifting me in his arms.


	17. Chapter 17

Seventeen

I snapped my eyes open the next morning as I sprang up in the bed, panting hard. Frantically, I looked around the room. Looking for any traces of the monster that was haunting me. All night Mike had floated in and out of my nightmares, taunting me, teasing me. I tried to run from him but it seemed like no matter how hard I tried to hide, he was always there. As I looked to my right, I found Edward sitting on the bed, frown planted on his face.

"You're ok," he said, softly. "No one is here but me."

"I know," I muttered, sitting up next to him. "What time is it?"

"Just after eight in the morning," said Edward. "You, um, were pretty vocal last night."

"Oh," I whispered, pulling my legs up to my chest.

"You, um, should get ready to go," muttered Edward. "We need to leave soon for our flight home."

"Edward, why are you being so nice to me?" I asked, laying my head on my knees as I looked over at him. "Everyone else is pissed with me for staying so long but not you. Why is that?"

"Bella, you should have left. That's a given," smiled Edward. "Would it have been as easy as they think it is? Fuck no. Getting pissed with you isn't going to help you deal with anything. Now, I wish I could have saved you from all of that but I couldn't. All I can do now is be here to hold you when you need someone to hold you, listen to your ramblings, and tell the rest of them to back the fuck off."

"I don't deserve a friend like you," I whispered. Edward tensed up for a moment before he leaned over and kissed my cheek.

"You deserve the moon and the stars, Bella, and everything in between," murmured Edward. He pulled back and climbed off the bed. "I'll meet you in the hall in five minutes."

"Ok," I smiled.

I watched as Edward walked out of my room, letting the door shut behind him. It took me a minute to realize that I was actually smiling. It seemed like I did a lot of smiling when Edward was around. What did that mean? Was it possible that I was feeling more than friendship for him?

I shook my head as I climbed off the bed. I pulled my suitcase onto my bed and pulled out a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. I went into the bathroom and changed. Once I had washed my face and brushed my teeth, I headed back into my room. Charlie was standing in front of his bed, going through his suitcase. He looked up at me and I saw pain flash across his face.

"Morning," I mumbled, stuffing my dirty clothes into my suitcase.

"Bella-"

"I'll, um, meet you in the lobby, ok?" I whispered, interrupting him.

I picked up my suitcase without letting him answer me. I hurried out of the room and found Edward leaning against the wall. I slipped my hand into his and pulled him down the hall to the elevator. It might have been my imagination but I could have sworn I felt a tingle when our hands connected. Had it always been there?

We settled on one of the couches in the lobby while we waited for the others to come down. Edward grabbed the remote and started flipping through the channels on the TV. I snuggled up next to him and closed my eyes, just enjoying the quiet.

"I think I am going to write a book," I said after several quiet minutes.

"That's a good idea," said Edward. "What about?"

"I don't know," I murmured. "My life. Maybe it would help if I used it to get everything out."

"Certainly wouldn't hurt," said Edward, slipping his arm around me, pulling me closer to him. I felt him lean his cheek down on the top of my head. "Maybe it's time to think about finding a therapist."

"What if they blame me?" I whispered.

"Then we tell them to fuck off and find someone new," said Edward. "But you can't keep holding all of this in anymore."

"I know," I muttered. "I'm just nervous."

"I understand," whispered Edward, turning so that his lips were pressed against my forehead. "But you can do it, Bella."

"Will you go with me?" I asked, softly.

"If you want me to," murmured Edward.

"I do," I whispered.

Esme, Carlisle, Emmett, Alice, Jasper, and Charlie came down a few minutes later. All of them looked exhausted and I automatically felt guilty for making them worry about me. Edward sighed as he stood up and pulled me to my feet.

"I need coffee before we leave," he announced. He pulled on my hand, dragging me after him. "Stop feeling guilty."

"How'd you know I was?" I asked.

"Cause I can read you like a book," snorted Edward. He stopped and turned back to me. "I know that they are all hurting because of last night but they needed the wake up call. They all act like just because he is dead that you can just move on. They needed to hear what you told them. You need to suck it up and stop worrying about everyone else's feelings and start working out your own."

"They just don't make it easy," I sighed, shaking my head. Edward cupped my face in his hands.

"You need to stop thinking about them and start thinking about what would make you happy," he murmured.

I was speechless as I looked into his emerald green eyes. It was like all of the sudden it was just me and Edward. His eyes dropped to my lips for a moment before he looked back up at my eyes. I licked my bottom lip as I leaned forward just a millimeter. Edward leaned forward as his lips opened. He was so close that I could smell his sweet breath.

"Edward, Bella, let's go," bellowed Emmett. I took a shaky breath as I pulled back.

"Fucking asshole," muttered Edward, leaning back. "We're coming."

Edward muttered something else under his breath as he and I headed back out to the others. He glared at Emmett, who looked confused on why his brother was mad at him. I picked up my suitcase and followed Edward out of the hotel, leaving the others to catch up with us. We loaded into our cabs and headed to the airport. Emmett was riding with me and Edward, which just seemed to make Edward madder.

The madder Edward got the more confused I got. It seemed like Edward was going to kiss me. Part of me wondered if he was or if it was just my mind playing tricks on me. The other part of me was trying to figure out if I wanted him to. Sure I thought Edward was ridiculously good looking but I had never seen him as more than a friend. Or did I? I wasn't so sure anymore.

The cabs pulled up in front of the airport and we climbed out. Edward grabbed my bag and his bag in one hand and placed his hand on my back, ushering me inside. I have to admit that I liked the feeling of his hand on me. By the time we made our way through security and down to our gate, Edward had calmed down quite a lot, even if he wasn't talking to Emmett. We had been sitting outside our gate for about five minutes when Rose came rushing up to us.

"Shit, I thought I was going to miss the flight," she sighed, gasping for air. Rose set her bag on the floor and took the seat next to Emmett, who was smiling like a fool.

"Um, Rose, what are you doing here?" I asked.

"Oh, I, um, I'mgoingbacktoTexaswithyou," she rushed out.

"I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that," I smirked, cocking my eyebrow at her. She rolled her blue eyes and leaned back in her seat.

"I said I'm going back to Texas with you," she said, slower and with a bit of an attitude.

"Why?" I asked.

"Oh, um, because I want to make sure that you are ok," she muttered, blushing as she did anything but look at Emmett, who was smiling bigger than ever.

"Uh, huh," I snorted. "Ok."

"You are welcome to stay with us, Rose," smiled Charlie.

"Oh, um, thank you, Charlie. That would be nice. I wasn't sure I wanted to stay at the Best Western again," laughed Rose. "I mean it was nice but hotel beds suck."

"Don't they," agreed Emmett. "I slept like shit all week. I missed my bed."

"Well, I guess it's good that you will be back in it tonight, isn't it?" asked Rose, turning toward him.

She tossed her blond hair over her shoulder and I swear, I saw Emmett blush. I shared a look with Edward, who was nearly red with suppressed laughter. Edward tried to take a deep breath but as soon as he opened his mouth, loud guffaws came bursting out of his mouth. Me, being the supportive person that I was, started laughing with him.

"Sorry," gasped Edward, trying to stop his laughter. "Just…shit….sorry."

Edward stood up and grabbed my hand, pulling me to my feet. He was practically running as he dragged me away from the gate, laughing so hard I had tears running down my face. Finally, he stopped and leaned against the wall and took a deep breath.

"Oh my god, did you see that?" he laughed. "Emmett fucking blushed."

"No shit," I snorted, shaking my head. "Like I don't know why Rose is coming back to Texas."

"God, my stomach hurts from laughing so much," chuckled Edward, gripping his side, tightly.

"I thought you were going to throw up from laughing so hard," I snickered.

"I almost did," snorted Edward. He took another deep breath. "Ok, I think I'm good now. We can go back."

"Are you sure?" I asked, cocking my eyebrow at him. "I wouldn't want you to get back over there and suddenly spew everywhere."

"I'm sure," said Edward, rolling his eyes.

Edward and I made our way back to the others. Everyone looked up at us. Emmett blushed and folded his arms across his chest. Edward looked back at me and chuckled softly. I bit my lip as we took our seats, trying hard not to outright laugh again. The thing is, in all the years that I've known Emmett, I've never, ever seen him blush.

"What's so funny?" asked Esme, looking from me to Edward, who had a goofy grin planted on his face.

"Nothing, Mom," said Edward, looking over at Emmett. "Nothing at all."

"Bella?" asked Esme, looking at me.

"Yes, Esme?" I asked, feigning ignorance.

"What is so funny?" asked Esme.

"Like Edward said, it's nothing," I said.

"Uh huh," muttered Esme. "If you say so."

I rolled my eyes as I crossed my legs and folded my arms across my chest. Did she want us to embarrass Emmett in front of Rose?

"Bella, I've been thinking that maybe you should come work at the clinic," said Carlisle. I looked over at him and scrunched up my face.

"Why would I do that?" I asked.

"So that you aren't just sitting around the house anymore," sighed Carlisle, sharing a look with Charlie. I looked from him to my father.

"Oh, I see," I muttered, angrily. "Been having another talk about what do about me, huh?"

"Bella, it's not like that," insisted Charlie.

"Bullshit, Dad," I snapped. "I don't want to work at the fucking clinic. I don't want to work at Alice's shop. I don't want to be told what to do anymore. All I want is for you to leave me alone but if you can't do that as long as I am in your house, then I will leave."

The flight attendant called for our flight to board so I grabbed my carry on bag and headed over to board, ignoring the looks coming from the people around us. I heard Edward tell them to just stop before he came over and got into line behind me. We made our way onto the plane and took our seats. Charlie, Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Alice, and Jasper all avoided eye contact with me as they boarded the plane. Rose, however, stopped and bent over to me.

"You are going to lose them if you don't stop being such a bitch," she whispered. "They are trying to help and you are just pushing them further away."

"What do you know?" I muttered.

"Honey, I know more than you think," snapped Rose.

She stood up and headed back to her seat next to Emmett. I buckled my seat belt and tried to ignore the part of my brain that was telling me that she was right. It's not like I don't know that I am acting like crazy, psychotic bitch but they don't understand that the last thing I need right now is for them to come in and try to take control of my life. It was time for me to take control of my life.

"So I'm thinking that you and I should go bowling in a couple days," said Edward. I looked over at him and cocked my eyebrow.

"Why?" I asked. "I hate bowling."

"But I like it," said Edward, smiling at me. "Plus we get to wear bowling shoes."

"You make that sound like a good thing," I snorted. "Bowling shoes are nasty."

"You just aren't getting it," sighed Edward. "And bowling shoes are fucking awesome. I would wear them everyday if I could."

"Seriously?" I asked. Edward nodded his head. "That's, um….Yeah, that's pretty messed up."

"Whatever," said Edward. "The point is that we need to do something fun that will get you away from the crazy people. It was either bowling or roller skating."

"Why are those our only two options?" I asked. "There's the Dilla's baseball."

"Out of town for the next three weeks," said Edward.

"Ok, what about putt-putt golf?" I asked.

"Lame," snorted Edward. He suddenly smiled and looked over at me. "We could go shopping."

"Shut the fuck up," I hissed, looking back to make sure Alice didn't hear him. "Fine, we will go bowling. Just do not mention that word to her or I will have to do something really, really mean."

"I'm not scared of you," laughed Edward.

Our plane landed in Dallas a few hours later. We unloaded off the plane but had to run to our next gate in order to make our flight back to Amarillo. An hour and fifteen minutes later, out flight landed at the Rick Husband Airport in Amarillo. We headed off the plane and made our downstairs to gather our luggage.

Everyone else was able to pull their luggage right off but not me. No, my luggage seemed to get lost at some point between when I checked it in at the airport in Chicago and we landed here in Amarillo. It took me nearly an hour to fill out my claim on my missing suitcase. By the time, I climbed into the front seat of Edward's car I was tired and cranky.

Luckily, he seemed to understand that I wasn't in the mood to talk to him because he turned up the music and drove us back to Clarendon. A little over an hour later, he pulled up in front of Charlie's house.

"Don't be too hard on him," said Edward, looking over at me. I turned from him and looked as Charlie and Rose climbed out of the car and headed inside. "He's just worried that you are hiding."

"I know," I muttered. I looked back over at Edward. "Bowling in a couple days, ok?"

"Ok," smiled Edward. "Goodnight, Bella."

"Goodnight, Edward," I said, returning his smile.

I climbed out of his car and headed inside. I could hear Charlie in the kitchen. I went over and leaned against the door frame, watching as he piddled around.

"I'm not hiding," I said. Charlie stopped what he was doing and looked back at me. "I know that is what you think I am doing."

"You're right, I do," sighed Charlie. "I don't know what to do or to say. Every time I open my mouth, I say something that pisses you off."

"Don't talk about me to Carlisle and Esme or anyone else," I said, sitting down at the table. Charlie sat down across from me. "If you are worried about me then talk to me but don't…don't talk about me behind my back."

"Fair enough," nodded Charlie. "Don't push me away anymore." Charlie paused and took a deep breath. "I just got you back, Honey, and I don't want to lose you again."

"You're not going to lose me again, Daddy," I whispered through my tears. "I just….I just need some time to deal with everything inside my head. I'm going to start looking for a therapist or someone to talk to because I can't…."

"That's good, Honey," said Charlie, moving to the chair next to me. He pulled me into his arms and hugged me. "That's really good."

"I love you, Daddy," I cried, gripping onto him.

"I love you, too, Bella," whispered Charlie.

He kissed the top of my head and I felt his shoulders shake as he cried with me. We sat like that for several minutes before I stood up. I kissed his cheek and headed upstairs to my room. The door to the guest room was open and I saw Rose unpacking her suitcase. I went over and knocked on her door. She looked up and smiled.

"Can I ask you something, Rose?"

"Sure," she said, softly.

"Do you like Emmett?" I asked. She took a deep breath as she sat down on the bed.

"Yeah, I do," she murmured. "I can't really explain it, Bella, but he's really sweet and goofy and…I'm taking a chance with him and it scares the shit out of me but I think he's worth it."

"He is," I muttered. I went over and sat down on her bed. "When Alice and I were freshman, there was this boy, Cory, who thought he was the best thing since slice bread. He took an interest in Alice, who hated him with a passion. One day Cory came to school and started a rumor that he and Alice had slept together over the weekend. Needless to say it didn't take long for Emmett, who was a senior, to hear the rumor. He knew it was a lie. After school, he dragged Cory up to me and Alice and made him apologize in front of everyone for spreading the lie about her. From that moment on, everyone knew that you don't mess with Alice or me because Emmett or Edward would take it out of your ass. Emmett's a good guy, Rose."

"So is Edward, Bella," said Rose, smiling at me. "It seems like to me that he is working pretty damn hard to make sure you are ok."

"I just wish I knew why," I muttered, standing up. "Night, Rose."

"Night, Bella."

I closed her door behind me and headed into my room. I changed into my pajamas and climbed into my bed. As I drifted off to sleep, I though back to when Edward almost kissed me. Was it possible he liked me?


	18. Chapter 18

Eighteen

"Fuckity, fuck, fuck, shit, motherfucking, piece of shit," I growled, throwing open the front door to the house and stomping my way into the kitchen.

"Um, something wrong, Bella?" asked Charlie, laughing as I muttered four letter words under my breath.

"Yes," I snapped. "My motherfucking, piece of shit car won't start and I'm suppose to meet Edward at his house so we can go fucking bowling."

"Bella, calm down," laughed Charlie, pulling me to a stop. I growled under my breath, causing him to laugh even harder. "Did you just growl at me?"

"Maybe," I muttered, fighting my own smile.

"Wow," snorted Charlie. "Look, take my truck and I will call Emmett about coming out and picking up your car, ok?"

"Ok," I whispered. "Thanks, Dad."

"You're welcome," smiled Charlie. "Have fun bowling."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," I mumbled.

I headed back out of the house and glared at my car before I climbed into Charlie's truck, a huge ass Dodge Ram, extended cab, blah, blah, blah. I really didn't care about any of it expect for the fact that I hated driving it. It was too big and I felt like the smallest person in the world when I was behind the wheel.

I sighed as I placed the key in the ignition and started it. The beast roared as it came to life. Rolling my eyes and huffing, I threw it into reverse and pulled out of the drive way. I pulled down my sunglasses as I pulled the truck onto the road and headed into town.

I pulled the truck up in front of Edward's house a few minutes later. I cut the engine as quickly as I could. Edward pushed open his screen door and snorted as I climbed out of the driver's seat.

"Um, why are you in Charlie's truck?" asked Edward, chuckling.

"Well, I woke up this morning and thought, gee why don't I drive the oversized, pain the ass truck into town instead of my nice, comfortable car and I guess my car can read my mind because it decided not to start for me this morning," I muttered, folding my arms as I leaned against his car.

"Hmm, that sucks," grimaced Edward, locking up his house. He came over and leaned up against his car, smiling like the smug bastard he was. "Guess this means I get to drive, doesn't it?"

"Whatever," I muttered.

Edward laughed harder as we climbed into his car. I made sure to buckle my seatbelt just as snuggly as he does when I drive. He rolled his eyes and pulled out of his driveway. We stopped and grabbed an Icy from the Taylor's Food Mart before we headed onto the highway toward Amarillo.

"So how's things with Charlie been since we got back?" asked Edward.

"Same, I guess," I said, shrugging my shoulders. "I can tell he isn't sure how hard to push or if he should push at all, I guess. He did agree to stop talking to Carlisle and Esme about me, though."

"That's a start I suppose," said Edward, pulling around a large semi. "So what's wrong with your car?"

"I don't know," I sighed. "It wouldn't start this morning. Charlie was going to call Emmett for me."

"Oh," snorted Edward, looking over at me. "He was taking Rose out on the lake this afternoon."

"I know," I laughed, shaking my head. "She was so excited this morning. I thought I was fixing to have to tranq her."

"I have never seen Emmett like this," said Edward. "He's like all….goofy and happy and shit."

"He deserves it," I murmured, looking out the window.

Edward turned on the radio as we fell into a comfortable silence. Less than an hour later, he pulled his car into a parking space in front of Western Bowl. I swear the man was so excited about bowling that he reminded me a little bit of Alice when she shops. When I told him this, he flipped me the bird and called me a jerk. I couldn't help but laugh as I climbed out of the car.

We headed inside and over to the shoe counter, where an old man with sparse grey hair and leathery skin was spraying disinfectant into a bunch of shoes. I guess it's suppose to make me feel better but it didn't really.

"What can I do for you?" he asked.

"We need a lane, a pair of twelve shoes and, Bella, what size shoes do you wear?" asked Edward, smiling as he looked over at me.

"Six," I said, resisting the urge to roll my eyes. I could tell Edward was very excited about this.

"Alrighty," chuckled the man. He grabbed our shoes, a paid of dark green and maroon ones for Edward and a pair of green and orange ones for me, and set them on the counter in front of us. "How many games you planning on playing?"

"I don't know," said Edward, shrugging his shoulders. "A couple."

"Ok, well, I'll turn on lane thirty for ya," he smiled, and I noticed that he was missing several of his back teeth. "You can pay for your games when you drop off your shoes."

"Thank you," smiled Edward, picking up his shoes.

I grabbed mine and followed him over to lane thirty. Edward sat down and started entering our names into the automatic score board while I pulled on the grotesque shoes, grimacing the entire time. Once I had secured the shoes onto my feet, I went in search of a ball. I finally found a pretty aqua blue one and went back over to Edward, who had changed into his own shoes and had already found his ball, a black one that looked like it weighed at least fifteen pounds.

"You're first," smiled Edward.

"Yay me," I mumbled.

Edward chuckled as I went over and rolled my ball down the lane. Honestly, I expected it to roll right into the gutter but it didn't. My ball rolled down the lane and knocked over three pins on the right hand side. I couldn't help but smile as I turned and looked back at Edward, who was also smiling.

"I actually knocked down some pins," I snorted.

"It was a nice roll," said Edward, leaning back in his seat. "See if you can knock down the rest of them."

"Yeah, that's going to happen," I scoffed.

I picked up my ball again as it came shooting out the ball return. I lined myself up in the middle of the lane and rolled my ball down. I cocked my head to the side as it rolled and rolled until it hit the middle pin. That pin fell backwards and scattered all but one of the remaining pins. I rolled my eyes and looked back at Edward.

"There's always one hold out, isn't there?" I asked.

"Yep," snorted Edward. "My turn."

"Can't wait to see the master in action," I snickered.

"I never said I was a master at bowling," muttered Edward, picking up his ball. "I just said I liked the shoes."

"Oh, ok," I laughed, shaking my head. "Cause that makes it all better."

Edward rolled his eyes this time as he moved over and lined himself in the middle of our lane. He did some fancy movement with his legs where he kicked his right leg behind him as he let go of the ball. It looked pretty neat but I would probably fall and break my arm if I tried it. His ball rolled down the lane, knocking over all the pins. He turned and smirked a little.

"Prick," I mumbled, walking past him.

"That hurts," he said, pretending to be hurt. I looked back at him and stuck my tongue out at him. "Watch that tongue, Bella, or someone's going to snatch it."

"Like I'm scared," I teased.

"That's it," smirked Edward.

He came at me so quickly that before I knew it, he had his arms wrapped around me. I gasped from the sheer shock of it all. Edward's smirk fell off his face as he looked down at me. Suddenly, it was like we were the only two people in bowling Alley. He kept one arm around my back while he brought his other hand up and cupped my face.

I bit my lip as he started leaning down. His lips were almost touching mine when we heard a little giggle from behind us. Edward pulled back as we both looked over to see a little girl around five, peeking over the seats behind us. I felt my face turn the brightest shade of red as I pulled out of Edward's arms and took a deep breath.

"It's my turn," I whispered.

"Right," murmured Edward.

I picked up my ball and lazily rolled it down the lane. The ball rolled down and hit two pins but I didn't really care. I bit my lip as I turned back and looked at Edward, who was sitting there with a weird look on his face. Like he was halfway pissed and halfway confused. As I picked up my ball again, I swear I saw him glare at that little girl. I rolled my ball down the lane again, managing to knock down five more pins.

"It's your turn," I said, softly.

"Ok," mumbled Edward, standing up.

He walked past me, brushing against my shoulder. I looked up at him and saw him watching me. I blushed and looked away. What the fuck was wrong with me today? I was turning into a fucking teenager, blushing every time a cute boy even looked at her. I plopped my ass in my seat and watched as Edward grabbed his ball. I saw him shake his head and line himself up in the middle of the lane. He did his fancy trick but only managed to knock down eight pins this time. He picked up the spare with his second roll.

We spent the next couple hours bowling. Edward did great while I did…ok. I managed to get one strike in the three games that we played. Honestly, I really wasn't even paying much attention. I was distracted by Edward. It seemed like every time I turned around he was watching me, smiling at me. He would brush my the side of my arm or push back a strand of my hair. It wasn't anything he hadn't done a hundred times before but it seemed different now.

"Did you have fun?" asked Edward as he slipped off his bowling shoes.

"I'll admit that I did have fun," I smiled. "Even with the shoes."

"I'm telling you, these shoes are awesome," sighed Edward, picking up his bowling shoes. "What do you think Alice would do if she caught me in a pair of these?"

"After she recovered from her stroke, she would drag you to the closest shoe store and buy you some real shoes," I laughed. "But it is tempting, isn't it?"

"Yeah, it is," snorted Edward. "Are you hungry?"

"Starving," I smiled. "Where do you want to eat?"

"I was thinking that, if you wanted to, we would go to The Plaza," said Edward, smiling at me.

"Hell yes," I squealed, jumping up. "I haven't been there in like forever!"

"I figured as much," laughed Edward.

He and I headed over to the counter and dropped off our shoes. He practically begged me to let him pay for the games and the shoe rental. I rolled my eyes and let him. I mean, damn, if it means so much to him that he was willing to beg in public, who am I to argue. Once he had paid for everything, we headed back out to the car.

He pulled up in front of The Plaza, a small Mexican food place, a few minutes later. I nearly jumped out of the car and ran inside. He came in after me, laughing at how excited I was. We were lead to a small table in the back and given menu's. I was looking it over when our waiter came over and deposited a bowl of chips and two bowls of salsa in front of us.

"What can I get you drink?" he asked, looking at me.

"Oh, I'll take a coke," I said. He nodded and looked over at Edward, causing his smile to widen.

"And for you, sir?" he asked, huskily. I bit my lip to stop from laughing.

"The same," muttered Edward.

"Are you ready to order?" asked our waiter, looking straight at Edward. I swear I saw him lick his lips. I choked on the chip I had just taken a bit of and nearly burst out laughing.

"Honey, are you ready?" asked Edward, looking over at me with wide eyes.

"Yeah, I'll take the sour cream chicken enchiladas," I chuckled.

"And for you?" asked the boy, who couldn't have been much older than most of Edward's students.

"I'll take the Chimichanga plate," mumbled Edward, looking very uncomfortable.

"I'll get your drinks right out," smiled our waiter, winking at Edward. He walked away and I started laughing so hard, I was nearly crying.

"It's not funny, Bella," chuckled Edward, shaking his head.

"Oh, it's completely funny," I guffawed. "I think he likes you."

"EWW!" laughed Edward. "Don't say shit like that."

Our waiter, who introduced himself as Chris, brought our cokes out a few minutes later. Edward and I munched on the chips and salsa, which was so fucking good, while we waited for our meals to come out. I took a few minutes to look around. This place had changed so much in the fifteen plus years since I'd been here. The walls were a dark orange color with a lot of bright artwork on the wall. My favorite part of the restaurant was the fountain that sat in the middle. The water sprayed upwards and fell back down but because of the orange lights in the bottom, it looked like fire. When I was little, I would always threw a quarter into the fountain. Charlie would mutter about it being a waist of money but Renee would shush him and let me do it. She would tell me that it would make all my dreams come true.

"You got a quarter?" I ask, looking over at Edward. He smiled and dug into his pocket, pulling out a shiny quarter.

"Here you go," he smiled, placing it in my hands.

"Thanks," I murmured.

I stood up and went over to the fountain. I closed my eyes as I felt the tears beginning to build up in my eyes. I felt Edward come up behind me and slip his arm around my waist, pulling me back into him as he gripped my hand that had the quarter in it. He raised it up as he leaned down to my ear.

"Here's to nothing but happiness," he whispered, helping me toss the coin in.

I turned and looked up at him. He was looking at me with the most intense look in his eye. He slid his hand up my arm and cupped my face gently. I felt my breath catch as he leaned down, lips parted just slightly. Just as his lips were almost on mine, we heard a gasp. We pulled back and saw our waiter, standing next to our table with our dinner.

"Oh, um, sorry," muttered Chris. He put our plates on the table. "The plates are hot."

I took a step back and took a deep breath as Chris walked away from our table. Edward muttered something but I couldn't tell what it was as we went back over and sat down. We didn't say much as we ate our dinner, which was very good. Once we were done, we paid our check and headed back out to the car.

Our car ride home was filled with awkward silence and meaningless conversation. Every once in a while I would feel Edward looking at me. I would look over at him and he would turn away, smiling and blushing. I liked when he looked at me. Edward pulled his car up into his driveway and cut the engine. Neither of said anything as we climbed out of the car.

"Bella…" he trailed off, walking me back to Charlie's truck. He reached down and grabbed my hand. "I had a really good time today."

"Me too," I smiled, softly as I looked up at him. "Who knew bowling could be so fun?"

"I did," he smirked. He took a deep breath as his tongue slipped out and brushed across his bottom lip. "I…"

Edward trailed off as he brought his hand up and cupped my face gently in his hands. My breathing quickened as he slowly leaned down until his lips were just a hairs width away from mine. I could feel his warm breath across my face. I leaned forward, closing the distance between our lips.

Edward moaned and pressed his down a little harder as he started moving his lips with mine. I slipped my arms around his waist, pulling his body flush with mine. Edward slipped his hands off my face, sliding them down until he could wrap them around me. After several minutes, he pulled his lips from mine but didn't move back at all.

"I've wanted to kiss you all day," he whispered.

"Me too," I whispered, breathlessly. "I'll, um, call you tomorrow, ok?"

"Ok," murmured Edward. "Goodnight, Bella."

"Goodnight, Edward," I smiled.

I leaned up and pressed my lips against his again before I untangled myself from his arms and climbed into Charlie's truck. Edward smiled at me as I started the truck and headed back out to Charlie's. He and Rose were sitting in the living room when I came into the house.

"How was bowling?" asked Charlie.

"It was…amazing," I murmured, walking past them as I headed upstairs. "Just…amazing."

I barely heard them both start laughing as I walked into my room and shut the door. I changed into Edward's t-shirt and climbed into my bed. I could see the moon shining through my bedroom window as I rolled onto my side. I felt a tear slip down my face as I smiled to myself. I was in love with him and he had kissed me.


	19. Chapter 19

Nineteen

When I woke up the next morning, I felt…fucking happy. For the first time, in a really long time, I woke up with a smile on my face that didn't feel off, or forced. I climbed out of my bed and went over to my window. I pulled my curtains apart, letting the sun shine brightly on me. It felt like it had been forever since I really enjoyed the sunlight.

"Wow, you seem…happy," laughed Rose. I blushed as I turned and looked at her. "Aw, and you're blushing, too."

"Shut up," I muttered, biting my bottom lip. "How was the lake?"

"How was bowling?" she asked, cheeks turning a light pink.

"Um, fun," I mumbled, feeling the heat rise in my own cheeks.

"Yeah, for me too," she whispered.

The two of us looked up at each for a couple seconds before we burst out laughing. We fell on my bed, laughing so hard we had tears running down our faces. We were both pathetic and goofy. It wasn't until I heard someone clear their throat in the doorway that I realized it wasn't just me and Rose anymore. I looked over and saw Charlie leaning against the doorframe, smiling as he looked at the two of us.

"You two are being awfully happy in here," he commented, cocking an eyebrow. "Something I should know?"

"No," we said at the same time.

"Uh huh," he snorted, pushing off the doorframe. "Fine, don't tell me but know that I am always watching."

"Ugh, he's such a dad," I whined as he left.

"You say that like it's a bad thing," snorted Rose, sitting up. I sat up with her.

"I don't mean it to," I said, softly. "So…"

"He kissed me," whispered Rose. "We were sitting in the boat, talking about…our pasts. I was a little emotional and he leaned over and pushed the hair out of my face. He told me… that he was sorry that he wasn't there when I needed him," Rose wiped a tear away, "and then he kissed me."

"Aw, Rose," I whispered through my tears. "Who knew Emmett had a soft side?"

"I did," smiled Rose, taking a deep breath. "I knew it the minute I saw him."

"You really like him, don't you?" I asked.

"Yes, I really, really like him," whispered Rose. "I …think I might love him."

"Wow," I murmured.

"I'm so scared, Bella, but I don't think I can live without him," said Rose, shakily. I reached over and grabbed her hands. "Ok, Enough talking about me. Tell me about the amazing bowling."

"Oh," I smiled, blushing bright red.

"It must have been pretty damn good if you are blushing like that," teased Rose.

"The bowling was fun," I said, softly. "I mean, we had a good time but it's more than that Rose."

"Bella, what…do you like him?" asked Rose, grabbing my hand. I looked up at her as I let a tear travel down my face.

"I'm in love with him," I whispered. "He kissed me last night. It was like…all the sudden…"

"Aw, sweetie," murmured Rose, pulling me into her arms.

"He makes me feel better, Rose," I said, taking a deep breath.

"Honey, that's a good thing," said Rose.

"I know but I'm terrified," I whispered. "I mean, what if he doesn't feel the same way. I'm so fucked up right now and…"

"Bella, sweetie, the man is head over heels for you," laughed Rose. I rolled my eyes and looked away. "Seriously, it couldn't be more obvious. I watched him a lot while we were in Chicago. He was so worried and protective of you."

"Everyone was," I muttered.

"Not like he was," disagreed Rose, pushing a strand of my hair behind my ear. "Bella, he loves you. Just go talk to him."

"I will," I whispered. "Thanks, Rose. I'm happy for you and Emmett."

"Thanks, Bella," blushed Rose.

An hour later, I had showered, cleaned my room, cleaned the rest of the house, and done anything else I could think of to waste time. I'll admit it; I was scared to death to go talk to Edward but I knew I needed to. He was too important to me to blow off. So I climbed into Charlie's truck and headed into town. A few minutes later, I pulled up in front of Edward's house.

I took a deep breath before I climbed out of the cab and headed up to the front porch. I knock on the door softly. A moment later, Edward pulled the door open. He smiled and I felt my heart start racing.

"Hey," he said, softly.

"Hi," I murmured.

"Come on in."

"Thanks," I muttered, stepping past him. He grabbed my hand as I walked by. "So, um, how'd you sleep last night?"

"Really good," smiled Edward, pulling me over to the couch. We sat down, him right next to me still holding my hand. "I dreamed of you."

"Oh," I blushed, ducking my head down. "I, um, dreamed of you, too."

"You did?" asked Edward. I looked up at him as I nodded my head. He had the biggest smile on his face. "I hope it was a good dream."

"It was," I smiled. "Alice was kicking your ass for wearing bowling shoes."

"She would, too," laughed Edward, leaning back on the couch. "Was that all that happened?"

"No," I murmured, turning and facing him. "I, um, might have dreamed about you…kissing me."

"Kissing you," he whispered. "Like this?"

Edward leaned in and pressed his lips down onto mine. Even though he had kissed me the night before, the moment his lips touched mine still shocked me. Edward slid his arms around my body, laying me back on the couch. He was halfway laying on me. He swiped his tongue long my bottom lip. My lips parted on their own and he slowly slipped his tongue into my mouth.

My hands seemed to find their own way up his arms to his hair, locking themselves in his wild, auburn locks. Edward pressed his lips down onto mine harder as I felt his hand slide up my leg, over my thigh to my hip. It wasn't until I felt his hand slip under the hem of my t-shirt that I got nervous.

"No, wait," I whimpered, turning my head and ending our kiss.

"What?" he asked, huskily. I could feel his breath on the side of my neck.

"I just…too fast," I whispered.

"Oh, shit, I'm sorry, Bella," said Edward, moving off of me. "I didn't…crap."

"No," I said, sitting back up. "I just need to take this slow."

"So you aren't regretting us?" asked Edward. I could hear the doubt in each word he spoke.

"Of course not, Edward," I smiled. "It's just…moving too fast and I don't want to rush into a physical relationship."

"Ok, ok, that's fine, as long as I can keep seeing you," said Edward, smiling. "And maybe kissing you?"

"Yeah, and kissing me," I smiled, blushing.

"I love that blush," he murmured, causing me to blush even more. "You're going to kill me with the blush, you know that don't you?"

"No," I smiled, leaning over and nestling myself next to him. Edward wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me a little closer to him.

"It's beautiful," he whispered. "Just like the rest of you."

I was fixing to say something back to him but his phone rang. Groaning, he pulled his arm away from me and stood up. He was muttering something under his breath as he headed into the kitchen to get the phone. I thought it was both cute and funny.

"Hello," he muttered. "Nothing, Em. What did you want?…yeah, she's right here. Hang on." Edward held the phone out to me. "My annoying brother needs a word with you."

"I'm not annoying," yelled Emmett, so loud that I could hear him through the phone. I laughed as I took the phone from Edward.

"Hey, Emmett," I laughed.

"I'm not annoying," he repeated.

"Of course you're not," I said, trying to sooth him.

"You know, Bella, I don't think you believe me," sighed Emmett.

"Emmett, I do not think you are annoying," I said, once again. "Now, why did you need to talk to me?"

"Oh, yeah, it's about your car," he started. "I'm afraid I have bad news."

"What?" I asked, warily.

"Your car is…dead," he said, seriously. "I could fix it but it would end up costing you…a lot. That's with me just charging you for parts."

"How much is a lot?" I asked, softly.

"Like several thousand," muttered Emmett.

"Oh, fuck," I whispered.

"I know, Bella, and it's not even worth that," said Emmett. "It's a really old car."

"I know," I cried.

"Are you crying?" asked Emmett.

"No," I choked out. Edward came over and grabbed the phone from me.

"What the fuck did you say to her?" growled Edward, wrapping his arm around me. "Fuck, Emmett, that car belonged to her mom…no shit, Sherlock…I know…I will…ok…we'll see…yeah, ok…later."

Edward hung up the phone and tossed it onto the table before pulling me closer to him. It was silly to be this upset about that car but it was all I had let from my mom. Charlie gave me that car for my sixteenth birthday. It was only thing that Mike couldn't take from me and now it was gone.

"It's ok, love," murmured Edward, running his hand up and down my arm. "It's ok."

"It was all I had left of her, Edward," I whispered, clutching his t-shirt in my hand.

"I know," said Edward, tightening his arm around me.

"Now, I'll have to buy a new car," I grumbled.

"Yeah," said Edward. I sat up and looked at him. "I'll help you find the perfect car."

"Thanks, I guess," I sighed, leaning back on the couch.

"Emmett invited us to a cookout at the lake, if you want to go," said Edward.

"Who's all is going be there?" I asked, looking up at him.

"Emmett and Rose," smiled Edward, giving me a look. "And Alice and Jasper."

"Ok, I'm in," I laughed.

Just after seven that night, Edward and I loaded up in his car and headed out to the lake. We had spent the afternoon cuddling on is couch, watching TV. Ok, so we kissed a little, too. Or maybe we kissed a lot. The point is we had a wonderful afternoon just being together. Edward parked his car next to Jasper's truck and we climbed out.

"Hey, before we go down there, I was wondering if you are going to be ok with them knowing about us?" asked Edward, shyly.

"I am if you are," I muttered, looking at the ground. Edward lifted my chin up and looked me in the eye.

"Bella, I want to tell the world about us," he smiled. "I just wanted to make sure you were ready. I will never push you for more than you are ready for."

"I'm ready for that, Edward," I said, smiling. "But thank you. I'm not used to having someone care about my feelings."

"Well, get used to it," he smirked. "Cause I do."

"I…care about you, too," I smiled, slipping my arms around his waist. "A lot."

Edward smiled as he brought his lips down on mine again for what felt like the millionth time today. I tightened my arms around him as he slipped his around me, one wrapping around my waist and the other cradling the back of my head. I moaned as I felt his tongue slip between my lips. Edward moaned and, somehow, pulled me even closer to his body.

"OH MY GOD!" squealed Alice. Edward and I broke our lips away from each other and snapped our heads in the direction of the squealing pixie. She was standing about ten yards away from us, jumping up and down, clapping her hands together. "I KNEW IT, I JUST KNEW IT!"

Alice turned and ran back down to the beach, where I somehow knew everyone else already was. I could feel Edward's entire body shaking as he tried to contain his laughter. It would figure that we would get caught by Alice of all people.

"Ok, let's go face them," I sighed, dramatically.

"If we must," murmured Edward.

"EDDIE, STOP MAKING OUT AND GETCHA ASS DOWN HERE!" bellowed Emmett.

"Asshole," muttered Edward.

I laughed silently as I let Edward led me down to the beach. Emmett and Jasper were standing in front of the fire they had built, tossing in pieces of wood while Rose and Alice were practically vibrating as they watched the two of us walking hand in hand. Rose cocked her eyebrow at me and I merely nodded my head.

"It's about damn time you two got together," squealed Alice, running over and jumping into my arms. I fell back into the sand with her straddling me.

"Fuck," muttered Jasper. Alice and I both looked over at him but he quickly turned away. I did see him blush though. Silly man.

"Alice, get the fuck off of me," I laughed, pushing her on her ass. "Gee, you may be tiny but you are fucking heavy."

"Funny, Bella," she grumbled. "Why didn't you tell me that you and Eddie-"

"Edward," snapped Edward, rolling his eyes.

"Whatever," muttered Alice. "Why didn't you tell me that you two were together?"

"Cause it just happened," I said, blushing as I felt everyone's eyes on me.

"Oh please," scoffed Emmett. "You two have been flirting up a storm for the last few weeks."

"Emmett, how was your day on the lake?" asked Edward, giving his other brother a look.

"Who wants hotdogs?" asked Emmett, changing the subject.

"Me," I nearly yelled, jumping to my feet.

"This conversation isn't over, Bella Swan," laughed Alice. "You're just lucky that I'm starving."

"Whatever, Ali," I snorted.

Edward laughed with me as we went over and speared our hotdogs into our wire hangers. We settled into a couple of camp chairs and roasted our dogs over the fire. Every once in a while he would look over at me and smile or wink. Of course I wouldn't have known he was doing this if I hadn't been starring at him.

"Hey, Bella," said Emmett as I was grabbing a bottle of water from the cooler.

"Hey, Em, " I smiled.

"I'm sorry about your car," he muttered.

"Don't worry about it," I smiled. "It's not your fault. It was an old car, Emmett. Bound to go out on me sooner or later."

"Well, if you need any help finding a new car, just let me know, ok?" he asked.

"I will," I said, nodding my head. "So, you and Rose, huh?"

"Yes," he said, looking around as he blushed.

"I think it's great, Emmett," I whispered. He looked over at me with a doubtful look on his face.

"You do?" he asked.

"Of course I do," I smiled. "Em, if Rose hadn't…Well, who knows where I'd be if she hadn't talked me into coming back here. I just want her to be happy and I want you to be happy, too."

"She makes me happy, Bella," blushed Emmett, looking down at his feet. "I've never felt like this before, you know? It's kind of scaring the shit out of me."

"Me too, Em," I mumbled.

"You and Edward?" he asked.

"Going slow but yes," I said, softly. "I have some work to do on myself, you know?"

"He'll be there every step of the way, Bella," said Emmett, pulling me in for a hug. "And so am I."

"Thank you, Em," I whispered. "You know, for always being my big brother."

"Always will be," he muttered.

"Everything ok over here?" asked Edward. I pulled back from Emmett and smiled.

"Yeah, everything's great," I smiled.

After a couple more hours down at the lake, joking and teasing each other, Edward and I climbed back into his car and headed back to his house. He walked me over to Charlie's truck and kissed me, softly. He pulled his lips from mine but left his forehead pressed against mine.

"I'll talk to you tomorrow," he murmured.

"Tomorrow," I whispered. "Goodnight."

"Night."

Edward kissed me once more before he helped me climb into Charlie's truck. I pulled on my seatbelt and headed back out to Charlie's house. I parked his truck and headed inside. He was laying on the couch, boots off, watching the Texas Rangers play.

"Hey, where you been all day?" he asked. I went over and sat down in his recliner.

"I was over at Edward's," I said. "Who's winning?"

"Edward's, huh?" snorted Charlie. "The Rangers are winning."

"Good game?" I asked.

"Not bad," shrugged Charlie. "So you and Edward seeing each other yet or what?"

"Dad," I whined.

"What?" he asked, chuckling. "I'm just asking."

"God, you can be such a…dad sometimes," I muttered, standing up. "Yes, we are seeing each other."

"About damn time," he laughed. I rolled my eyes and headed upstairs. "Night, honey. Have fun dreaming about Edward."

"SHUT UP, DAD!" I yelled.

I heard him start laughing as I shut the door to my room. I changed into a pair of cotton shorts and Edward's t-shirt, and climbed into my bed. Rolling onto my side, I drifted off to sleep thinking about him.


	20. Chapter 20

Twenty

"Bella," laughed Edward, nuzzling the side of my neck with his nose. "Beeellllaaaa."

"I'm ignoring you," I said, typing away on my laptop. "I really need to get this chapter done so I can update my story. I promised I would post an update today."

"You need to be looking for a car instead of writing fan fiction," chuckled Edward, pulling me back so that I was laying on the bed. "You can't keep putting it off."

"Yes, I can," I pouted.

"I'm going to bite that pouty lip off," growled Edward.

"Oh, I'm so scared," I mocked, smiling at him.

Edward growled as he leaned down and sucked my bottom lip into his mouth. My eyes rolled back into my head as Edward, knowing just what he was doing to me, slid his hand up my leg to my thigh. He pressed himself against me, grinding himself into me. I could feel his erection pressing into me and it was taking every ounce of control I had not to rip his pants off and have my wicked, wicked way with him.

Edward moved his lips to my neck, sucking and nipping on my skin. My fingers were nearly glued to his hair. Edward's lips slipped down to my collar bone, moaning a delicious sounding moan. My heart was racing, beating against my ribs.

"Edward…" I gasped or moaned. I really couldn't tell. "Edward…stop…"

"Sorry," he murmured, rolling onto the bed next to me. He was panting. "I got carried away."

"I just…" I shook my head.

"I know," he sighed. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"You didn't," I smiled, looking over at him. "Trust me, I was enjoying it."

"That's not helping," growled Edward, rolling onto his side. "Why are you putting off looking for a car?"

"I don't know," I shrugged.

"Well, you need to find one instead of driving Charlie's truck," said Edward, stroking my cheek.

"You are distracting me," I murmured.

"I know," smirked Edward, wiggling his eyebrows at me. I glared at him mockingly. "Ok, ok, finish your chapter and then we are looking for you a car."

"Fine," I sighed, "but no more distractions, then."

"Fine," pouted Edward. I rolled my eyes and sat back up, pulling my laptop back onto my legs. "I'll just lay here and watch you."

I really did try to ignore him. I mean, I really, really tried to ignore him but he was making it very difficult. He kept reaching up and running his fingers through my hair or rubbing my back. Based on the evil chuckle that kept coming out of his cute mouth every time I glared at him, he knew exactly what he was doing to me. I vowed to pay him back. I wasn't sure how, but I would make sure he paid dearly for this.

Somehow, I managed to finish the chapter I was working on and post it. I closed my laptop and glared at Edward, who just smiled at me innocently. I rolled my eyes and I leaned down and kissed him.

"You are not as innocent as you are acting, Mr. Cullen," I laughed.

"I don't know what you are talking about," he smiled. "I was laying here, minding my own business, and you pounced on me."

"Liar," I laughed.

"Whatever," he snorted sitting up next to me. "Let's find you a car."

"I don't want to," I whined, flopping back on the bed. Edward rolled his eyes as he laid down next to me, propping himself up on his elbow.

"Bella, you have to," said Edward, seriously. "This is a big step for you. This is your choice to make. Nobody to cram what kind of car they want you to buy down your throat."

-AWK-

"Bella, that is not the car you should get," said Emmett, firmly.

I crossed my arms as I looked at him. Emmett, Rose, Edward, and I were standing in the middle of the biggest car dealerships in Amarillo. After searching and debating for an entire week, I had decided on the car that I wanted to buy, a shiny black Audi R8.

Of course, Emmett insisted on coming with me and Edward. He said that as certified mechanic that I needed him to check out whatever car I chose to get so that I wouldn't get stuck with a lemon. While I understood his logic, I think he was looking for an excuse to bring Rose to Amarillo.

"And just why not?" I asked, cocking an eyebrow at him.

"Because it's too…flashy," muttered Emmett.

"Too flashy?" I asked while Edward snorted and Rose full out laughed.

"Yes," he said, firmly.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head as I looked back at the car. It was perfect. It was sporty, sexy, and beautiful. I was starting a new life in a lot of ways and this was just one more way that I was starting new. I sighed and looked back at Edward.

"Explain to the man why I want this car," I said.

"Bella wants this car, Emmett, because this is her way of starting fresh. This car represents everything that she is," explained Edward, slipping his arms around my waist causing me to blush. "It's sexy and beautiful." My blush deepened. "Full of passion and it's really fast."

"Are you calling me fast?" I asked, looking up at him.

"No," laughed Edward, pecking me on the lips. "I would never do that."

"Whatever," I smiled, pressing my lips onto his again.

Edward tightened his arms around me as he deepened the kiss. I slid my arms around him, puling him closer to my body. It wasn't until I heard both Emmett and Rose clear their throats that I remembered that we were standing in the middle of a parking lot with dozens of cars driving by watching our make out session.

"Oops," I mumbled, embarrassedly as I pulled my lips from Edward's.

"Sorry," whispered Edward.

"So, um, anyway," I muttered, looking at the ground. "I want this car."

"Bella-"

"Emmett, let the woman get the damn car," ordered Rose. I looked up at her and saw her nearly glaring at Emmett. "This is her decision and she won't let anyone make it for her, understand?"

"But-"

"How are we doing here?" asked a middle aged man with a horrible comb over and a beer gut. He had car salesman written all over him. "Finding anything you like?"

"No-"

"Yes," I said, interrupting Emmett. "I was looking at this Audi R8."

"Oh, she's a beauty, isn't she?" chuckled the man, running his hand over the car. It was kind of creepy, like he was dry humping the car.

"Um, yeah," I said, looking back at Edward, who looked amused. "I would like to test drive it."

"Sure thing," winked the man. Edward immediately tensed up. Wasn't so funny that the man was flirting with me, was it? "Let me just run get the keys."

"Ok," I said, cringing as he turned away. "He was…"

"Creepy," muttered Edward.

"Disgusting," grumbled Emmett.

"Funny," laughed Rose, causing all three of us to look at her. "Oh, come on. It was kind of funny when he rubbed his body all over the car. Poor car should feel violated."

"Rose," I giggled. "That's just…funny as hell."

"See," she laughed, high fiving me.

"Alright, Honey, you ready?" asked the sales man, coming back over.

"Sure," I said, sharing a look with Rose, who had buried her face in Emmett's chest in order to stifle her laughter. "Edward, Baby, let's go."

"Ok, love," said Edward, tightly as he slipped his arm around my waist.

The sales man, who informed us his name was Billy Bob, simply nodded his head and climbed into the back seat after handing me the keys. Edward and I climbed into the front seat and put on our seatbelts. I smiled as I placed the key in the ignition and started the car. It purred to life. I shifted into reverse and pulled back. Shifting it into drive, I pressed on the gas and pulled the car out into traffic.

Driving this car was like eating an ice cream cone in the middle of summer. It was like drinking a glass of freshly squeezed lemonade. It was simply delicious and invigorating. The more I drove it, the more I wanted it. After several minutes and testing it on the interstate, I drove the car back to the dealership and pulled it up in front of the main office. I cut the engine and the three of us climbed out.

"So, what'd you think?" asked Billy Bob. "We gonna head inside and start the paper work?"

"Depends," I said, crossing my arms over my chest. "Knock three grand off the sticker price and I'll pay you in full now."

"I can't knock that much off, Honey," he chuckled, shaking his head.

"Do I look like your honey?" I asked, harshly. He quickly shook his head. "I can take my business elsewhere. I saw one just like this at a dealership down in Dallas. I'm sure they'd be more than willing to meet my price."

"No, don't do that," he said, quickly. He hesitated for a moment. "I'll take it to my boss and see what I can do, ok?"

"Ok," I smiled. Billy Bob nearly ran into the building. I shook my head and looked back at Emmett, Rose, and Edward, all of whom were staring at me. "What?"

"Pay in full?" asked Edward, cocking his eyebrow.

"Yes, Mike's buying my new car," I smirked. "About damn time he did something for me."

"That's a lot of money to spend on a car," pointed out Emmett. "Maybe you should put half down and finance the rest."

"With what credit, Emmett?" I asked. "Everything was in Mike's name. The only reason I have this money is because we were still legally married when he died. For once, that bastard is going to pay for something."

"Ok, ok, I'm sorry," muttered Emmett, putting his hands up. I sighed as I closed my eyes. My temper was not going to help anything.

"I'm sorry, Em," I said, taking a deep breath. "This is what I want, ok?"

"Ok," smiled Emmett.

A few minutes later, Billy Bob came back out with a tall, thin man with greasy blond hair and beady blue eyes. Billy Bob looked very red in the face, like he wasn't used to moving around this much or this fast based on the fact that he was nearly running to keep up with the blond man.

"Hello, I'm Tim Grayson, the manager here," said the blond man, holding his hand out to me. I placed my hand in his.

"Bella," I said, simply.

"Bill was telling me that you are interested in the Audi R8 but that you are wanting to take some off the sticker price," said Tim.

"Yes," I said.

"Well, here's the thing, that car is already marked below market value," explained Tim, flashing me what he thought was an innocent smile.

"Oh, really?" I asked. He nodded his head. "Well, all the research that I've done would suggest otherwise."

"Um, research," muttered Tim, clearing his throat.

"Yes," I said. "In fact, you are listing this car three thousand dollars more than any other place I've found. Now, as I told Bill, if you aren't willing to meet my offer, then I will take my business to Dallas, where I know I can get this same car for cheaper."

"Ok, now let's not be hasty," said Tim, quickly. "How about I take one grand off?"

"Three."

"Fifteen hundred," he countered.

"Three," I said, again.

"Two grand but that is as much as I can do," pleaded Tim.

"Goodbye," I said, waving him off. I turned and headed over to Emmett's jeep, with him, Edward, and Rose following me. We were almost at the car when I heard it.

"FINE, THREE!" yelled Tim. I smiled as I turned back to him.

"Deal."

An hour later, Edward and I climbed into my new car and followed Emmett out of the dealership parking lot and on to the interstate that would take us home. Edward spent the entire ride back to Clarendon reading through the instruction manual. I pulled my car up into his driveway, behind his car, and we climbed out. He looked from my new car to his old car and frowned.

"Your car is better than mine," he pouted.

"Aw, pour baby," I teased.

"Yeah, you feel real bad for me," he snorted, leading me inside. "I can just feel the love."

"Stop being a baby," I laughed, wrapping my arms around him. "I'll let you sit in my car."

"Hmm, I guess I can accept that," whispered Edward.

He leaned down and pressed his lips down onto mine again. My arms tightened around him as he lead me over to the couch, backwards. He laid me down so that he was resting on top of me. Edward moved his lips down my neck to my collar bone, causing me to moan. Moving even further down until he was at the top of my barely exposed cleavage. He nibbled and sucked on the swell of my breasts.

"Edward," I moaned, shoving my breasts in his face. "God, feels….fuck!"

"Your skin tastes like ice cream," murmured Edward, licking and sucking on my skin. I felt Edward's hands travel up my thigh, over my hip to the bottom of my shirt. "Do you want me to stop?"

"No," I begged.

Edward slowly raised my shirt and pulled it off of me. My arms crossed in front of me, automatically covering myself. Edward looked me in the eye as he reached down and moved my arms. I felt my breath catch as he looked down at my lace covered breasts.

"They're perfect," murmured Edward, bringing his hand up and cupping one of them. "Like they were made just for me."

Edward leaned down and ran his lips over the lace bra that was covering my nipples. His tongue snaked out and curled around the already hard peak. I pulled on the back of his t-shirt, wanting to see the amazing body he was hiding. As I slipped the shirt off of him, I was not disappointed. Edward's chest was well defined, sculpted, and smooth. I ran my hand down his chest, feeling him shudder under my touch.

"Fuck, I love the feel of your hands on me," whispered Edward, closing his eyes. His breathing was heavy and I could the bulge in his khaki shorts.

"Touch me," I whispered. Edward's eyes shot up to mine.

"What?" he asked.

"Touch me," I said, just a smidge louder. "I need to feel your hands on me. Please, touch me."

"Are you sure?" he asked. "I don't want to rush you."

"Please," I begged.

Edward didn't say anything as he returned his hand to my stomach, slowly moving it higher until he reached my breast. I took a deep breath as I reached over and undid the front clasp, letting my breast fall free. Edward took a deep breath and licked his lips.

"Please," I whispered.

Edward leaned down and pulled my bare nipple into his mouth, sucking on it like he had never tasted a boob before, I wrapped my legs around his waist, pulling him into me. I could feel every inch of his length pressing against the fabric of his shorts. I lifted my hips, grinding them into him. Edward moved his lips from one breast to the other. My eyes fluttered to a close.

"Bella, we need to stop," murmured Edward, kissing my nipples.

"More," I moaned.

"No," said Edward, sitting up. His breath was ragged. "You aren't ready for more and I can't…I can't hold off if we don't stop now."

"I'm ready," I said, quickly. Edward closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"No, you're not," whispered Edward. He reached down on the floor and picked up my shirt and laid it across my chest. "Baby, I want you so bad but I don't want our first time to be like this. I want…"

"It's fine," I muttered, scooting up so that I was sitting up. I didn't look at him as I fixed my bra and pulled on my t-shirt. "I should go."

"Bella, please don't be mad," said Edward, grabbing my face in his hands.

"I'm not mad," I mumbled. "You're right. I'm not ready. I'm sorry. I got carried away, I guess."

"Don't be sorry," smiled Edward.

"I really should go," I whispered.

"Ok, I'll talk to you tomorrow," said Edward, standing up. He pulled me to my feet and wrapped his arms around me.

"Ok," I smiled.

I kissed Edward once more before I headed back out to my car. Shaking my head, I started my car and headed out to Charlie's. As soon as I turned into the driveway, I knew something was wrong. I slammed on my brakes and jumped out of the car. Charlie's house was on fire and my father was inside.


	21. Chapter 21

Twenty-one

"DADDY!" I screamed, running toward the house. I stumbled to the ground but scrambled back up onto my feet. "DADDY!"

"BELLA," yelled Charlie, coming around the back of the house. He pulled me into his arms as my knees gave out on me.

"I thought you were inside," I sobbed, throwing my arms around him. "I thought I was going to lose you, Daddy. I can't lose you."

"Honey, I'm ok," whispered Charlie, lifting me in his arms and moving away from the house. "Calm down. I got out, Honey."

Charlie held me tight as we watched the house burn. A few minutes later, the fire department showed up. They pulled out their hoses and started trying to put the fire out but I could tell the house was going to be lost. The house and everything we owned was going to be gone but at least we still had each other.

"BELLA!" yelled Edward. I looked over to see him, Emmett, Jasper, Rose, Alice, Carlisle, and Esme running toward us. He pulled me out of Charlie's arms and held me tight. "Baby, are you ok?"

"I'm ok," I cried. "I was so scared, Edward. I thought…Charlie…was…"

"I know, love," murmured Edward. "Me too."

"Charlie, are you sure you are ok?" asked Carlisle.

"Yeah, I'm fine," sighed Charlie, shaking his head. "I was sleeping on the couch when I heard the smoke detector going off. I managed to get out the back door before the flames hit it. I heard Bella screaming…I thought…"

"Thank god neither of you were hurt," whispered Esme, rubbing my back.

I reached out and grabbed her hand, pulling it up into my neck. She just smiled softly and kissed my head, knowing what I needed right now. The fire was consuming everything in the house. All our possessions, everything. All the pictures of my mother were shriveling up into nothing. After a few more minutes, an ambulance showed up. The paramedics insisted on checking Charlie over. He started to protest until me, Alice, Rose, and Esme all glared at him. He just sighed and agreed.

"Are you ok?" asked Edward, rubbing my back.

"No," I whispered. "I could have lost him tonight."

"But you didn't," murmured Edward, kissing the top of my head. "Charlie is fine."

"I know," I cried. Charlie, Carlisle, and Esme came back over a few minutes later. "Are you really ok, Daddy?"

"I'm fine, honey," said Charlie. "I'm going to head over to Carlisle and Esme's for the night. Are you coming with us or going to Edward's?"

"Um," I said, looking up at Edward.

"How about if we both go stay with them?" suggested Edward.

"I would like that," I whispered. "A lot."

"Ok, well, if you need me, just call, ok?" asked Alice, hugging me.

"I promise, Ali," I whispered, hugging her back. "Love you."

"Love you, too," she whispered. She pulled back and I noticed the tears in her eyes but didn't say anything. "Jas, come on."

"Ok," murmured Jasper, wrapping his arm around his wife. "Edward, just call."

"I will," said Edward, slipping his arm around me. Alice and Jasper said goodbye to Charlie and the others and headed over to their car.

"Well, I'm going to stay with Emmett," said Rose, fidgeting with her hands.

"Ok, Rose, I'll call you tomorrow or something," I said, hugging her.

"Try to sleep," she whispered. I just nodded my head as she pulled away.

"Bella, just a phone call, ok?" asked Emmett, hugging me. "Anytime."

"I know, Em," I whispered. "Take care of her."

"I promise."

Emmett and Rose headed over to his car and climbed in. Charlie followed Carlisle and Esme over their car. He turned and looked back at what used to be our house and shook his head. I'm sure he was feeling the same way I was. Like our life had been taken away from us. Edward lifted me into his arms and carried me over to my car. Suddenly, my new car didn't seem to be that big of deal anymore. I handed him the keys and let him drive us to his parent's house. Edward kept one hand on my knee while he drove. Almost like he was trying to keep me together.

Edward pulled my car up behind his parents and came around to my side. He helped me out, slipping his arm around my waist as we headed inside the large white house. I always loved this house. As kids we called this house the castle. It was a large Victorian style house with a huge wrap around porch.

"Well, perhaps we should all get to bed," suggested Carlisle, looking around at all of us.

"Yes, it's been a long day," agreed Esme. "Um, Charlie, you can take the guest room and Bella-"

"Is staying with me," said Edward, interrupting his mother.

"As I was saying, Bella you can stay with Edward," finished Esme, glaring at her son. "I'll get you some pajamas to wear."

"Thank you," I whispered.

"You're welcome, sweetheart," smiled Esme.

"Bella, honey, I'll be in the guest room if you need me, ok?" asked Charlie, hugging me.

"Ok, Daddy," I said, sniffing. "I'm so thankful you got out."

"Me too," chuckled Charlie, even though it wasn't funny. But I guess it's one of those situations where you don't know what to say. "I love you, Honey."

"I love you, too, Daddy," I whispered, leaning up and kissing his check. He turned to Edward as I pulled back but instead of saying anything, he just placed his hand on his shoulder. It was a small gesture of the trust he had in Edward.

"Goodnight all."

We bid Charlie good night and headed up the stairs. Esme wrapped her arm around my shoulders and lead me down the hallway to her bedroom. She shut the door behind us and went over to the dresser. I didn't even realize she was crying until I heard a soft sob slip out of her mouth.

"Esme?" I gasped, rushing over and wrapping my arms around her.

"What if you or Charlie had been stuck in that house?" she cried. I moved us over to the bed and sat with my arms wrapped around her. "After losing Renee and nearly losing you…"

"Oh, Esme," I whispered.

"I wish I could have been there to help you, Bella," said Esme, shaking her head. "I wish I could have stopped that man from ever putting his hands on you. I wasn't the mother you needed after Renee died."

"I didn't let you," I said, pulling my knees up. "It wasn't that I didn't love you, Esme, cause I do. I just wanted my mom. I wanted her to be the one who made my birthday cake and helped me get ready for my first school dance. She was supposed to be there to calm my nerves when I tried out for cheerleader or when Charlie escorted me onto the field when I was nominated for homecoming queen but she wasn't and I was mad about that."

"I know you were," sighed Esme. "Renee was my best friend, Bella. I never meant to take her place. I just wanted you to know that I loved you just as if you were mine."

"I know that," I whispered.

"Bella, I want you to know that I am really happy for you and Edward," said Esme, quietly. I looked over at her. She smiled and brought her hand up to my cheek, wiping away my tears. "My son hasn't been this happy in a long time. Well, except with the whole fire thing but you make him happy. You make him smile and he makes you smile in return."

"I love him," I whispered. I could feel my chin trembling. "I love him so much and I'm scared to tell him."

"Don't be scared, Sweetheart," smiled Esme. "I think he loves you, too."

"Mom, everything ok?" asked Edward, knocking on the door. Esme and I both laughed softly.

"Yes, Edward," said Esme, rolling her eyes. "Bella will be there in a minute."

"Ok," muttered Edward.

"You had better not keep him waiting," smiled Esme, shaking her head. She went back over to her dresser and pulled out a simple pink cotton nightgown. She came back over and handed it to me. "Sleep well, Sweetheart."

"Thank you, Esme," I whispered, hugging her. "For everything."

Esme kissed my forehead before I headed down the hallway to Edward's old room. He was laying on his bed in a pair of cotton shorts and no shirt. I felt my face turn bright red as I shut the door behind me and headed into the bathroom. I quickly stripped out of my clothes and pulled on the nightgown. I washed my face and brushed my teeth with my finger. Taking a deep breath, I opened the door to the bathroom.

Edward pulled the blankets back and patted the spot next to him. I made my way over to the bed and climbed on, cuddling up next to him. He wrapped his arms around me and held me close to his chest. Neither of us spoke for several minutes. Maybe we weren't sure what to say to each other or maybe we were just enjoying the silence.

"I was so scared," whispered Edward, breaking the silence around us.

"Me too," I said, softly. "I pulled up to the house and all I could think of was that Charlie was in there."

"Thank god, he wasn't," sighed Edward. "When Carlisle called me and told me that the department had been called out for a fire out there… I thought…I can't…"

"Me too," I murmured. I sat up and turned so that I was looking down at him. "I need to tell you something and I'm really scared."

"You can tell me anything," said Edward, sitting up next to me.

"I know that we've only been together for a couple of weeks and I have so much…shit to deal with…" I took a deep breath as I looked at my hands.

"You're kind of scaring me here," said Edward, slipping his hands into mine.

"I don't mean to," I muttered, closing my eyes. "I…I…I love you."

I kept my eyes closed as I waited for Edward to say something, anything, but he didn't. I slowly opened my eyes and saw him sitting there with a huge smile on his face. He slipped his hands out of mine as he brought them up and cupped my face gently. He leaned down and pressed his lips down onto mine once, twice, then a third time.

"I love you," he whispered, softly. "I love you, Bella. I think I've always been in love with you."

"You love me?" I asked as my eyes filled up with tears. I tried to stop them from spilling down my cheeks but I couldn't. Edward's smile grew as he wiped my tears off my face.

"Of course I love you," he said. "You're beautiful, smart, sexy as hell. I love that you are getting stronger and more confident everyday."

"You think I'm sexy?" I asked, giggling.

"Yes, Baby, I think you are very sexy," laughed Edward, laying us back on the bed. "I can hardly keep my hands off of you."

"I think you are sexy, too," I blushed.

"You do?" he asked, cheeks turning pink.

"Yes, I do," I smiled. "And beautiful, smart, and compassionate. I love everything about you."

"I love everything about you, too," said Edward. "Especially your eyes."

"My eyes?" I asked.

"Yes," smiled Edward. "They make me want chocolate."

"Chocolate?" I asked. Edward nodded his head. "Ok, but I like your eyes."

"Mine?" he asked, scrunching up his face. "Mine are horrible."

"No, they are beautiful," I sighed, smiling at him. "They sparkle."

"Ok," chuckled Edward. "I've never been told that my eyes sparkle before."

"Well, they do," I whispered, stifling my yawn.

"You should sleep, love," he said, pulling me into his arms.

"I love you," I murmured, wrapping my arms around his chest.

"I love you, too," whispered Edward.


	22. Chapter 22

Twenty-two

I noticed two things the next morning when I woke up. First, Edward snored sometimes. It wasn't very loud but he still did. Second, based on the extremely hard part of his body that poking into my ass, he was very happy to see me. I rolled so that I was facing him and watched him sleep. He had a small smile playing on his lips, almost like he was smirking. His hair was just as disheveled as it always was.

I let my eyes travel lower and looked over his chest. Edward was…so sexy. His chest was chiseled without being grotesque. He was sporting a very nice eight pack. I let my eyes travel even lower until I was looking at his morning wood. I could tell from the tent poking through his shorts that he was well endowed.

I bit my bottom lip as I carefully pulled back the waist band on his shorts and slipped my hand inside. Fuck me, he was going commando. Edward's eyes snapped open as I wrapped my hand around his length. I could barely get my hand around it.

"Bella," he moaned, thrusting his hips up. "What are you…fuck…doing?"

"What does it feel like?" I asked, moving so that I was straddling his thighs.

I used my free hand to pull his shorts down over him. Goddamn, he was huge. There were little bubbles of liquid seeping out of the tip. I leaned down licked it off. Edward's hands flew to the back of my head.

"God, Bella," he groaned. "You're killing me here."

I didn't say anything as I took him into my mouth, as far as I could. Edward moaned again and again. I loved that I was the one making him moan. I used my hand on the bottom part of his cock. I moved my mouth up and down on him, sucking harder with each pass. I used my tongue to massage the underside of his manhood. Every few seconds, I would hear Edward whispered my name followed by an several different curse words. I moved my free hand up his legs and started fondling his balls, tugging on them.

"Baby…move," urged Edward, pulling on me. I slipped him out of my mouth just before he shot his load in his stomach. "Fuck, Bella, that's one hell of a way to wake up."

"Did you like it?" I asked, softly. Edward snorted as he reached down and grabbed a couple of tissues off the table and cleaned his stomach.

"Like would be an understatement," smiled Edward, pulling me so that I was laying on the bed. "I loved it but you didn't have to do that."

"I wanted to," I blushed.

"Hmm," he murmured, sliding his hand up my leg. "Can I have my turn?"

"You don't have to," I mumbled, pressing my legs together.

"I want to but if you aren't ready for that…" he trailed off.

"I've never had someone do that," I whispered. Edward leaned up on his elbow, looking quite shocked.

"Seriously?" he asked. I looked away as I nodded my head.

"He was mostly into getting blowjobs and straight sex," I muttered. "I asked him once to…but he just laughed and said that my…that I was only good for one thing."

"Asshole," grumbled Edward.

Edward moved so that he was sitting between my legs. He kept his eyes locked on mine as he reached up under my nightgown and slid my panties down my legs. He tossed them onto the floor and pushed my nightgown up so that I was fully exposed to him. I expected myself to blush but I didn't. The way he was looking at me, made me feel beautiful. I pulled my nightgown off and tossed it onto the floor, leaving me completely naked in front of him.

"You are so beautiful," he murmured, sliding his hands up my thighs. "If it gets to be too much…just tell me to stop. Push me, hit me, whatever it takes, ok?"

I just nodded my head quickly. Edward leaned over and started kissing his way up my thigh, sucking and nipping everywhere. I could feel the wetness pooling in between my legs and he hadn't even touched me there yet. Finally, Edward reached the apex between my legs. He looked up at me, silently asking me if I wanted him to continue.

I nodded my head so quickly, that I am surprised my neck didn't break. Edward smiled as he looked down. He ran his fingers over me and I gasped as my back arched off the bed. Edward gently pressed my thighs against the bed as he leaned down. He slowly licked my wet core.

"Edward," I cried out, clenching the sheets in my hands. "More…please, more."

"Fuck, you taste divine," he murmured.

Edward leaned even further down and slipped his tongue in between my wet folds. I seriously thought I was going to die with the wave of pleasure that soared through me. Edward's hands tightened around my thighs as he practically picked me up off the bed and brought me up to his mouth.

"Edward," I moaned. "It feels so good…don't stop."

Edward just moaned, sending delicious vibrations through my entire body. Over and over Edward thrust his tongue in and out of me, tasting me. I could feel my orgasm starting to build, slowly moving through my body. Edward pulled my swollen bundle of nerves in between his lips and I lost it.

"Edward," I moaned, shaking as my climax washed over me. Edward lapped up everything I gave him before he leaned up and laid down on the bed next to me. "That was….yeah."

"I'm taking it you like that?" chuckled Edward, rolling onto his side and looking over at me.

"I liked it a lot," I murmured, softly as I rolled so that I was nestled up against him. "Thank you. You always make me feel so beautiful."

"You are beautiful," said Edward, kissing me softly. "Now, let's shower and go get some breakfast."

"Ok," I giggled.

Edward and I headed into the bathroom and took a shower together. He took the time to wash my hair and body. I, in return, did the same for him. Once we were done showering, we headed back out to his room. Edward handed me a pair of shirts and an old t-shirt he still had from when we were in high school.

After we had both dressed, Edward slipped his arm around my waist and we headed downstairs to the kitchen. Charlie, Carlisle, and Esme were sitting around the kitchen table drinking coffee while talking quietly.

"Morning," smiled Esme, standing up. "What would you like for breakfast?"

"I'll just make me and Edward some eggs or something," I said, stepping toward the fridge.

"I'll make them," she scoffed.

"You don't have to," I fretted.

"I know I don't," she said, smiling at me. "I want to. I don't get to do much cooking anymore now that all of you are grown. I've missed it."

"Oh, ok, that would be nice," I whispered. I went over and settled in the chair between Charlie and Edward. "Did you sleep ok, Daddy?"

"Once I fell asleep," sighed Charlie, leaning over and kissing the top of my head. "How about you, Honey?"

"I slept good," I murmured, laying my head on his shoulder. "Have you heard anything about the house yet?"

"No, I'm sure everything was lost, though," said Charlie.

"Here you go," smiled Esme, placing the plate of scrambled eggs in front of me and Edward.

"Thank you, Esme," I said.

"You're welcome," she said, sitting back down next to Carlisle while Edward stood up and went over to the fridge. He came back over and set a jar of salsa in front of me with a wink.

"Thank you," I laughed. Edward leaned over and kissed me.

"You're welcome, love," he whispered. He leaned back in his seat and noticed our parents looking at him, Esme and Carlisle with a smile and Charlie pretending to glare at him. "What?"

"Nothing," chuckled Carlisle, sipping his coffee. I rolled my eyes as I poured some of the salsa onto my eggs.

"You two are so cute," gushed Esme, bringing her hands up to her mouth.

"Mom," grumbled Edward, shoveling some eggs into his mouth.

"Edward, do I need to remind you that I can in fact hide your body where nobody would find it if you hurt her?" asked Charlie. Edward started choking on his food.

"DAD!" I yelled, patting Edward on the back.

"I'm just saying," laughed Charlie. Edward finally managed to swallow his food and stop coughing, all while Carlisle and Esme looked quite amused.

"Ugh, you are impossible," I snapped. "He could have choked to death."

"Oh, he's fine," scoffed Charlie.

"Charlie, I give you my word that I will not hurt Bella," said Edward. I rolled my eyes even if I was giddy on the inside. "I love her."

"I love you, too," I whispered, kissing him softly.

"Ugh, not at the table," whined Charlie. I laughed as I looked back over at him. "We are trying to eat here."

"Serves you right, Dad," I snickered, leaning back into my own seat and started eating my eggs. He chuckled and shook his head.

"It's my right as a dad to torment the boyfriend," snorted Charlie. "Trust me, your granddaddy put me through the ringer when I started seeing your momma."

"All her pictures are gone now," I whispered, putting my fork down.

"Yeah, I know," frowned Charlie.

Nobody said anything else as we finished our breakfast. All that we had left from my mother has burned up in that house. She was truly gone now. I offered to help Esme clean up the kitchen but she refused my offer. Edward and I headed out and sat on the porch swing while Charlie and Carlisle went over and started admiring my new car.

"I've been thinking," said Edward. I looked up at him. "I don't know if you've thought about where you are going to live now."

"No, I haven't," I sighed, shaking my head.

"Well, I was thinking that maybe…" he trailed off, nervously.

"That maybe what?" I asked.

"That maybe you might move in with me," he muttered.

"You want me to move in?" I asked, smiling.

"I mean, only if you want to," said Edward, rambling on. "I have a second bedroom if you would feel more comfortable using it instead of sharing my bed. I don't want you to think that-"

"I would love to," I said, softy. Edward looked up at me.

"You really want to live with me?" he asked, smiling a huge beautiful smile.

"Yes," I laughed. "Why is that so surprising?"

"I don't know," he chuckled. "I guess I was afraid that you would think I was rushing you or something."

"Edward, I love you and I trust you," I said, honestly. "I'm not saying that I am ready for more than just you holding me at night and, maybe, some more of what we did this morning," I said, blushing bright pink.

"I'm sure that can be arranged," whispered Edward, leaning in and kissing me.

"Oh man, they are kissing again," groaned Charlie. Edward and I both laughed as we pulled apart. Both he and Carlisle groaned as they settled into the wicker chairs on the porch. "Bella, that is one nice car."

"Yeah, I bet she drives really smooth," added Carlisle.

"You are not driving my car, Carlisle," I laughed.

"Why not?" he whined. "I let you take my Mercedes out when you were sixteen, didn't I?"

"Yes, you did," I laughed. "You were always a sucker for my puppy dog face."

"Always will be, too," snickered Edward, while Carlisle pouted.

A few minutes later, Emmett and Rose showed up followed by Jasper and Alice. Alice climbed out of her car and started pulling shopping bag after shopping bag out. Just when I thought she had stopped at around fifteen bags, Emmett came from around his car carrying around ten more. My mouth must have been hanging wide open because I felt Edward place his hand under my chin and push my mouth closed.

"What?" asked Alice when she noticed me staring at her.

"What the hell is all of that?" I asked, gesturing to the mountain of shopping bags at her feet.

"Clothes," she scoffed, shaking her head at me. "I know you honestly didn't think I was going to let you wear…that."

"How'd…why…" I trailed off, shaking my head. "I give up. What'd you get?"

"Well," she started, smiling as she started digging through the bags. "I figured that you and Charlie were going to need everything and even if you didn't, there was a lot that you needed to replace anyway. So I got up this morning really early-"

"No shit," muttered Jasper.

"And headed to Amarillo so I could start replacing your wardrobes," said Alice, ignoring Jasper's interruption. "Charlie, I bought you several pairs of new jeans. Nice ones that won't hang down your ass like your old one did. I also got you several new shirts, undershirts, socks, and underwear. I'm just assuming that you are a boxer briefs kind of guy and not a tighty whitey kind," rambled Alice, tossing all the clothes she had gotten my father at him.

"Um…thanks?" asked Charlie, looking over at me.

"Now, you know why I don't shop with her," I said, giving him a look.

"Anyway," sighed Alice, rolling her eyes. "Now, Bella, you were much more difficult to shop for because you are so fucking picky all the time." I flipped her off. "However, I managed to find you several pretty sundresses, skirts, tank tops, several new pairs of jeans that will actually fit, and a couple pair of shorts. I got you some new bra and panties sets from Victoria Secret's that I am sure Edward will love." Charlie turned and glared at Edward, who choked a little. "The best part was the shoes. It was like…Christmas all over again. I got you heels, flats, one pair of running shoes, some new boots, and a pair of flip flops."

"Wow, Alice…"I trailed off, shaking my head. "Thanks."

"You're welcome," she squealed as the front door opened and Esme stepped out.

"Charlie, Tyler is on his way over," said Esme. "He wants to talk to you and Bella about the fire."


	23. Chapter 23

Twenty-three

It was funny how in the span of three seconds the mood can shift from being light and almost carefree to being tense and heavy. That is exactly what happened, though. The smile fell off of Alice's face as she dropped the box of black, peep toed heels back into the shopping bag at her feet.

"Ok, Esme, " said Charlie, clearing his throat. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," said Esme, stepping out onto the porch with the rest of us.

None of us said anything else. I'm sure they were just as curious, nervous, and anxious as I was about what Tyler was going to tell us when he got here. Edward had moved his arm from around my shoulder and slipped his hand into mine, blending his fingers in with mine.

A few minutes later, a black Chevy Tahoe pulled up in front of the house. Tyler Crowley climbed out of the drivers seat and started up the sidewalk. Tyler was a husky man with dark hair and eyes. He wasn't quite as big as Emmett but pretty damn close. He graduated the same year that Alice and I did. He had always been a pretty nice guy. You know, someone you could count on when things got tough. Tyler was one of Charlie's deputies as well as the fire chief. He stepped up on the porch and smiled softly.

"I'd ask how you guys are doing but I pretty much know the answer," said Tyler, leaning against the railing. He looked over at me. "Been awhile, Bella."

"Yeah, it has," I muttered. Tyler's eyes flickered down to mine and Edward's hands and he smiled before he looked over at Charlie.

"Sherriff, glad to see you got out okay," nodded Tyler.

"Thanks," snorted Charlie, shaking his head. "So, what's the deal, Crowley?"

"The house is a total loss," said Tyler, clearing his throat. "The fire destroyed everything before we could get it put out. We believe the fire started in the front of the house, on the porch from what we can tell. We found residue of some kind of accelerant on the porch but we don't know what it is. I've sent samples down to Lubbock to see if they can figure out what they used."

"They?" I asked. Tyler sighed and looked over at me.

"Someone started that fire, Bella," said Tyler.

I blinked several times as I processed those words. Someone had purposely set fire to our house. Someone had purposely tried to kill me or Charlie or both of us. What kind of evil fucking person would do something like that? In that moment, I knew exactly what kind of person would do something like that.

"Oh my god," I muttered, letting my tears fall down my face. "It was her."

"Who?" asked Tyler.

"It wasn't enough that she turned her son into a monster who nearly killed me, now she's decided she wants to finish the job," I muttered, ignoring Tyler's question.

"Bella, you can't know that it was her," said Charlie. I snorted and stood up.

"Oh, please, that bitch has hated me since the day he took me home to meet her. She blames me for him dying and probably for the fact that her husband finally grew a set and told her to go to hell. Now, she's decided to kill me," I snapped. "As if she had already helped ruin my life."

I wrapped my arms around my body as I rushed off the porch and headed into the backyard, ignoring my father and Edward as they called after me. I let my tears fall silently as I settled on the back steps. As if I didn't have enough to deal with, now I have my crazy ex-mother-in-law after me. Hadn't I been through enough? Six years of living through hell at the hands of her son wasn't enough for her. She felt the need to finish what he started.

"Hey," said Rose, sitting down next to me.

"Hey," I muttered.

"I grew up in New York City," said Rose, suddenly. I looked over at her but she was looking straight ahead. "My parents, Arthur and Vivian Hale, were the people to know," she snorted, shaking her head. "My father was the president of one of the biggest banks in the city and my mother, well, she loved to spend his money. I used to think they were…the best."

"Until?" I asked. Rose let a tear fall down her face as she turned and looked at me.

"Until they turned their backs on me," she whispered. Wiping her tear off, she took a deep breath. "When I was sixteen, my father allowed me to go with him and my mother to the biggest bash of the year. That was the night he introduced me to Royce King, the son of one of his business partners. Royce was two years older than me and very handsome. He asked me to dance and I let him take me out onto the dance floor. I thought he was my prince charming," murmured Rose.

"He asked to go to dinner the next night with him and I fucking squealed when I told him yes," snorted Rose, continuing on with her story. "My mother was almost as giddy as I was while she was helping me get ready for my date. She told me that a man like Royce King was going to except me to be nothing short of perfect if I was going to be on his arm. When he picked me up, he kissed my hand and told me I looked beautiful. He led me out to his car and helped me inside. He took me to this little French restaurant and pulled my chair out for me. I thought he was being a gentleman."

"I had a good time with him and when he walked me up to my door, he asked me to be his girl," said Rose, pulling her knees up to her chest. "I said yes and let him kiss me. I thought I was in love with him."

"But you weren't, were you?" I asked. Rose looked back over at me.

"No, I wasn't," she murmured. "For awhile, everything with Royce was great. He was a little hand friendly but I thought that was how all boys his age were. We had been going out for three months when he hit me the first time. He thought I was cheating on him because he saw me talking to this boy outside of my school. I tried to tell him that he and I were working on a science project together and that he was gay but Royce didn't listen. He slapped me and told me that I was his girl and he wasn't going to put up with my shit," said Rose, letting her tears fall freely. I reached over and grabbed her hand.

"I told him I was done with him and ran home," continued Rose, gripping onto my hand. "He sent me flowers everyday for a week, begging my forgiveness. He swore it would never happen again and I believed him. For awhile, it didn't. He was sweet and caring again. A couple months later, he got mad when I refused to go down on him. He hit me again and he… he…" Rose trailed off once again. "When he took me home, I nearly jumped out of his car and ran inside. My parents were sitting in the front room and they asked me what was wrong. I told them that he had…raped me," whispered Rose. I wasn't sure what to say so I just wrapped my arms around her.

"They called me a liar and told me that I was a whore," cried Rose, laying her head on my shoulder. "I couldn't believe that my parents would treat me like that. I was their fucking daughter. I stood there for several minutes, holding the sides of my torn shirt across my chest. I knew that I couldn't stay there. I turned around and walked out of that house and never looked back."

"I'm so sorry, Rose," I whispered.

"I went to a friend's house and told her parents what had happened," said Rose. "Vera's parents took me to the hospital and called the police. I pressed charges against Royce but his father was able to hire the best lawyer in the city to defend his lying ass. My parents testified for him, can you believe that?" she asked, shaking her head.

"No," I whispered.

"After he was found not guilty, I knew I couldn't stay in the city. I moved to Chicago with my Aunt Irina, who was considered the black sheep of the family. She helped me deal with everything, get the help I needed, and pushed me to finish school and go to college," said Rose, looking back over at me. "She's the reason I became a lawyer. She told me that it was my chance to help those like me who needed help but didn't know where to go."

"Like me," I mumbled.

"Yes, like you, Bella," smiled Rose. "Of course, I never thought you would lead me to where I really belong."

"With Emmett," I said, smiling at her.

"Yes, with Emmett," giggled Rose, laying her on top of mine. "I know you are scared, Bella. Just me, I know. I lived in fear for a long time that Royce was going to come after me again."

"Did he?" I asked.

"No," whispered Rose. "He was killed about a year later when he attempted to rape another girl."

"Did you ever hear from your parents again?" I asked.

"No," said Rose, again. "They called my Aunt Irina after I started my freshman year in college but she told them to go to hell. As far as I know, they went."

"How'd you do it?" I asked. "How'd you find the strength to just breath?"

"I don't know," sighed Rose. "My therapist really helped me learn how to express my feeling instead of keeping them all bottled up inside. Irina and I took a self-defense class together to help empower me to feel safe inside of my own body. I focused all of my attention on my school work and pushed myself to be the best goddamn lawyer I could be."

"But," I whispered. Rose smiled as she looked down at me. "There is a but, right?"

"But," she said, softly. "I didn't really live. Except for Irina, I didn't have anyone. I kept everyone at arms length and focused on doing my job. I thought that was enough but it wasn't."

"Why not?" I asked.

"Irina passed away a year ago," whispered Rose, blinking back her tears. "She, um, had cancer and it just…She fought hard but she was ready. When she died, I realized that I was all alone, Bella. I found myself sitting in her house, surrounded by her friends and I was completely alone. It was the worst feeling I have ever had."

"I know that feeling," I muttered.

"I know you do," said Rose, wiping her tears off. "I knew I was going to have to make some serious changes in my life but I didn't know how or what. Then you came to me."

"Me?" I asked.

"Yes, you," smiled Rose. "You were so lost, Bella. I knew I had to help you. I couldn't let you push your family away like mine had done me. That's why I pushed you so hard to come back here, Honey. You needed your daddy. I needed you to have your daddy because I don't have one."

"Yes, you do," said Charlie. Rose and I snapped around and found him standing behind us. We stood up as he headed down the steps to the two of us. "I'll be your daddy, Honey."

"You will?" cried Rose. Charlie pulled Rose into his arms as he let a tear slip down his face.

"Yes, honey, I will," whispered Charlie, reaching out and pulling me into their hug. "I will take care of both of my girls."

For several minutes, Rose and I just stood there with our arms around Charlie and let our tears fall freely. Rose needed Charlie just as much as I did. Without her, I would probably already be dead or worse, living in that hell again. Charlie kissed the top of each of our heads before we followed him inside the house. Tyler was gone but everyone else was still there.

Emmett smiled as Rose made a beeline for him and sat down next to him. He slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her as close as he could get her. I could almost see the tension melt off Rose as her entire body relaxed. As I took my seat next to Edward, I realized that Emmett was her Edward. He was her lifejacket just as Edward was mine. I looked up at my love and smiled.

"You ok?" he asked, just loud enough for me to hear.

"I don't know," I whispered, honestly. "I just don't know."

"I love you," he whispered, pressing his lips to mine.

"I love you, too," I murmured. I laid my head on his shoulder as he slipped his arm around me and held me tight. I looked around at everyone. "So what did Tyler say?"

"You basically heard all he had to say on the matter. Karen Newton is still at large so we have alerted law enforcement all over the state to be on the look out for her. Hopefully, we'll be able to find her before she does something else," said Charlie.

"So you think she started the fire, too?" I asked.

"Yeah, I do," sighed Charlie, shaking his head.

"Well, we will just have to make sure we are all extra careful," said Esme, looking around at all of us. She stopped when she got to me. "You and Charlie should just stay here for awhile."

"That'd be nice," said Charlie.

"I'm moving in with Edward," I whispered. Everyone, but Edward, turned and looked at me.

"You're what?" asked Charlie, shortly.

"I'm moving in with Edward," I said, again. Charlie's eyes flittered to Edward. "Dad-"

"No, it's fine," muttered Charlie, taking a deep breath. "You are an adult, who is free to make your own choices and I will support you no matter what."

"You will?" I snorted.

"Yes, Bella, I will," said Charlie, mocking my sarcastic tone. "I'm a cool dad, remember?"

"You cool?" I laughed. "Since when?"

"I've always been cool," insisted Charlie. I scoffed as I looked over at Alice, who was giggling softly.

"Junior high dance," we said together. Charlie's eyes went wide as his face turned bright red.

"Shit, I forgot about that," grumbled Charlie.

"Ok, but we didn't," laughed Alice. "Who could forget you chaperoning the dance?"

"Yeah, Dad," I laughed. "I mean, don't you remember Lauren Mallory asking you dance?"

"I've tried to forget," groaned Charlie, burying his face in his hands. "That girl was so persistent."

"She had the biggest crush on you," I teased.

Charlie groaned again as we all laughed at him. As we continued to razz my father about the adolescent crush that Lauren had on my father, I looked around at everyone. Maybe we would be ok, as long as we stuck together. Just maybe.


	24. Chapter 24

Twenty-four

I lifted my hand up and rubbed the back of my neck. My shoulders and neck were stiff and sore from hutching over the computer. I stifled my yawn as I looked back down at the screen and reread the words I had written for what felt like the millionth time. By now, they all seemed like nothing more than a bunch of gibberish.

It's been two days since Tyler informed us of the damage done to the house, done to our lives. Two days since the last bits and pieces of my mother burned away into nothing more than piles of ashes. Two days since I packed up everything that Alice had bought me and moved into Edward's house with my father's somewhat reluctant blessing. He put on a pretty brave face but I knew it was hard on him. He had almost lost me once and I would make sure he knew that he was never going to lose me again.

While I was happy living here with Edward, I was still scared that Karen Newton would come back and take him from me, take everyone from me. I was still scared that she would come back and finally kill me, finishing what her son had started so many years ago. It wasn't enough she had turned her son into a monster or nearly killed her own husband, now she had decided it was all my fault. She truly was a crazy bitch.

"What are you doing up?" asked Edward. I looked over and saw him leaning against the door frame to our office. "It's three in the morning, love."

"I couldn't sleep so I thought I would write for a while," I said, looking away from him.

"Nightmares again?" he asked moving over and standing behind me, placing his hand on my back. I nodded my head softly. "The fire?"

"Yes," I murmured. "This time I was trapped in the fire and I could hear all of you screaming for me to get out but I couldn't find my way out."

"Baby, why didn't you wake me up?" he asked, kneeling down next to me.

"You were sleeping," I muttered. "You needed a good night's sleep."

"So do you," said Edward, turning my face to look at him. "Come back to bed. I'll hold you all night, Ok?"

"Ok," I whispered.

I saved my work and shut down my computer before I followed Edward back down to our bedroom. It still felt odd to think of it as our bedroom but that's what it was now, even if my clothes were the only things in the room that I actually owned. I crawled into the large king sized bed and nestled myself into his arms. I felt Edward kiss the top of my head as I drifted off to sleep again.

"Bella," whispered Edward, gently shaking my shoulders.

"What?" I asked, groggily, keeping my eyes closed.

"I've gotta head up to the college for a little while," he whispered. "Are you going to be ok here by yourself?"

"Yeah, yeah," I mumbled, lazily waving him off. "Just going to sleep."

"Ok, I'll be back this afternoon," he chuckled. "I love you."

"Love you, too," I mumbled.

I barely remember Edward leaning down and kissing me before he left. I curled up with his pillow and drifted back to sleep.

I'm not sure how long I had been sleeping when someone started banging on the front door. Ok, so maybe banging is the wrong choice of words but when you are peacefully asleep, any gentle knock sounds like banging. I stumbled out of bed and out to the living room. I turned the lock and threw the door open.

"Esme?" I asked, looking at Edward's mother. She was standing in the doorway with a huge smile on her face. She was wearing a pair of jeans and a white t-shirt. I had never seen her so casual before. "What are you doing here so early?"

"Bella, sweetheart, it's eleven-thirty," laughed Esme.

"Oh," I muttered. "I didn't realize it was that late already."

"Can I come in?" she asked.

"Oh, yeah, I'm sorry," I said, stepping back. She stepped into the house and I shut the door behind her.

"Are you ok?" asked Esme. "You look like you just woke up."

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said, plopping down onto the couch. Esme sat down next to me. "I didn't sleep very good last night."

"Oh," she said, softly. "Well, I was hoping you would join me for lunch."

"Sure," I smiled. "I'd love to. Just let me get dressed."

I headed back into the bedroom and stripped out of my pajamas. I pulled on a pair of the jeans that Alice had bought me. Fuck, they were tight. I pulled on my bra and a tank-top. I slipped on my flip flops. I headed back out to Esme.

"Ready?" I asked.

"Yep," smiled Esme. "Let's take your car."

"You just want to ride in my new car, Esme," I teased.

"I really do," she laughed. "Carlisle will be so jealous!"

Esme followed me out to my car and climbed into the passenger seat. I slid into the driver's seat and smiled as I looked over at Esme. She was nearly vibrating with excitement. I started the car and pulled it out of the driveway.

"Where to?" I asked.

"Nuttin Fancy," she said. My smile slipped off my face. "What's wrong?"

"I, um, kind of made a fool of myself last time I was in there," I muttered.

"Oh, well, I'm sure it wasn't that bad," said Esme.

I didn't say anything else about it as I drove through town. I parked my car into the parking lot of Nuttin Fancy and cut the engine. I reluctantly followed Esme's lead and climbed out of the car. We made our way inside. Sue Clearwater was standing behind the cash register, cashing out an older man. He left and she looked up at me and Esme, smiling.

"Esme, it's great to see you, again," said Sue, coming around the counter and hugging Esme.

"You too, Sue," laughed Esme. She pulled back and gestured to me. "Have you met Charlie's daughter, Bella, yet?"

"Just briefly," smiled Sue, looking over at me. "How are you, Bella?"

"I'm fine," I whispered, shifting uncomfortably from one foot to the other. "I'd like to apologize for-"

"No apology is necessary," said Sue, interrupting me. I looked up at her. "You were confused and angry about whatever was on your mind at the time. It's nice to see you doing better."

"Oh, thanks," I murmured.

"Well, you ladies take a seat anywhere you want and Amanda will be right with you," said Sue.

I followed Esme to a table in the back corner where a tall man with sandy hair was sitting. He couldn't have been much older than I was. He stood up as Esme and I approached the table and smiled at the two of us. I looked over at Esme, trying to figure out what was going on.

"Bella Swan, I would like you to meet Garrett Mitchell," said Esme, smiling at me. "Garrett is the principal at the elementary school."

"It's lovely to finally meet you, Bella. Esme has told me so much about you," said Garrett, offering me his hand. I placed my hand in his.

"It's nice to meet you, too," I muttered. Dropping his hand, I looked over at Esme. "What the hell is going on?"

"Bella, sit down and I will explain everything," smiled Esme, pushing me into one of the seats.

"You didn't tell her about this meeting?" chuckled Garrett, taking the seat across from me.

"No," laughed Esme. I scowled, trying to figure out what was going on when a thin, blond girl came up to our table.

"Welcome to the Nut, what can I get you ladies to drink?" she asked, looking from me to Esme. It was then that I realized that she was the woman with the baby at Carlisle's office. "I remember you from Dr. Cullen's office."

"Yeah, I remember you, too," I said, softly. "How's your baby?"

"Oh, Talia is fine," smiled Amanda.

"I'm glad," I said, smiling at her.

"Thank you," said Amanda. "Now, what would you like to drink?"

"Um, I'll just take some tea," I said, softly.

"Sweet or un-sweet?" she asked.

"Un-sweet," I grimaced. Amanda giggled and looked over at Esme.

"I'll take un-sweet tea, too," laughed Esme.

"Ok, do you know what you want to order or do you need a few more minutes?" asked Amanda.

"I know what I want," said Esme, looking at me. "How about you, Bella?"

"Um," I said, picking up a menu.

"You look while I get their orders," smiled Amanda, turning to Garrett and Esme. "What can I get you?"

"I would like to try the special," ordered Garrett.

"One fried pig," laughed Amanda. "For you, Mrs. Cullen?"

"I will take the turkey club with no tomatoes," ordered Esme. Amanda nodded her head and looked over at me.

"Um, I'll just take the chef salad with ranch dressing," I said, closing the menu.

"Ok, I'll get those right out," smiled Amanda, before walking back toward the kitchen. I turned back to Esme and Garrett.

"Ok, now tell me what the hell is going on," I demanded.

"Bella, I'm looking for a new librarian for the elementary library and Esme suggested that you might be interested in the job," explained Garrett. I looked over at Esme with wide eyes.

"Now, Bella, don't be upset," said Esme, quickly. "Garrett and I were just talking when he told me about the old librarian quitting. He said he's been having a difficult time finding someone who knew anything about books and I thought about you. This would be a great chance for you to earn your own money and still be around books."

"Why didn't you ask me before you set this meeting up?" I asked, shortly.

"Because you would have told me to butt out and let you live your own life," she said, just as short. I rolled my eyes and looked away from her. "You know it's true."

"Probably," I muttered. I looked over at Garrett, who was leaning back in his chair with his arms folded across his chest. "Why did you agree to meet with me?"

"Well, when Esme explained that you received your BA from Duke University, I couldn't help but wonder why on earth you were here and not teaching at the college or at least the high school," said Garrett, honestly. "But then she told me that you were going through a difficult time and was trying to regain some control of your life."

"She did, huh?" I muttered, harshly, looking at Esme.

"All I said was that you were looking for a fresh start," said Esme. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Losing my temper with her was not going to be good and I knew it wouldn't help, anyway.

"Ok," I said, opening my eyes and looking back at Garrett. "So let's say I'm interested in this job. What would I do exactly?"

"Well, you would be responsible for managing the library, of course. We use a reading program called Accelerating Reading. It would be your job to run that and keep track of the kids' progress," explained Garrett. "There would be a few other responsiblitlties such as helping manage the lunch room at lunch time, helping out when we are short on subs, and running the book fair in December but I don't think you would have any trouble with any of that."

"What makes you think that?" I asked, crossing my arms in front of me.

"Anyone who can manage to get into Duke University and graduate can do that," snorted Garrett.

I wasn't as confident as he was but the job did sound interesting. At least this way, I would feel like I was contributing instead of letting Edward pay for everything. Plus, it was a job working with books, even if they were children's books. I didn't realize I had been so lost in my own inner ramblings until Amanda set my salad in front of me.

"Thank you," I said, softly.

"Can I get you anything else?" asked Amanda, setting Garrett's fried pig, or pork tenderloin, and Esme's sandwich in front of them.

"No, I think we are good, Amanda," smiled Esme.

"Let me know," said Amanda before she left. I poured my dressing onto my salad and stabbed my salad with my fork. I looked up at Garrett.

"Are you officially offering me the job?" I asked.

"Yes, I am," smiled Garrett. "Are you accepting?"

"Yes," I said, softly.

Garrett, Esme, and I talked about a few more of the details while we ate. I wouldn't be making much, barely more than ten thousand dollars a year but I would have full benefits and it would be my money that I was earning. Something that I could be proud of. Once we were done eating, we headed up to the cash register. Esme insisted on buying our lunch, even though both Garrett and I protested.

I thanked Garrett again for the job and told him I would be in the next day to fill out all my paper work. Esme and I climbed into my car and I drove us back to mine and Edward's house. His car was in the drive way when I pulled in. Esme and I climbed out of my car and I walked her over to her car.

"Are you mad at me?" she asked, softly.

"No," I said, smiling at her. "I don't like that you tricked me into this meeting but I think I am going to like that job."

"I think you will, too," smiled Esme, hugging me. "I'm proud of you, Bella. You are growing stronger every day."

"Thank you, Esme," I whispered.

She kissed my forehead before climbing into her car and driving away. I turned and headed into the house. Edward was laying on the couch, watching a re-run of CSI when I came in. He looked up and smiled his crooked smile. God, how I loved that crooked smile.

"Hey, where have you been?" he asked. I kicked off my shoes and went over and laid down on top of him. "I like this."

"I had lunch with your mom and Garrett Mitchell," I said, softly.

"Garrett?" he asked, cocking his eyebrow. "Do I need to talk to my mom about trying to set you up with happily married men?"

"No," I laughed. "He offered me a job."

"Really?" asked Edward, smiling. "Doing what?"

"You are looking at the new elementary librarian," I smiled.

"That's great, love," cheered Edward. "I think you will be a great elementary librarian."

"Thank you, Baby," I smiled, laying my head down on his chest. "I like the idea of making my own money, you know?"

"I do," said Edward. "I think it will be good for you to have your own money. Nobody telling you what to spend because it's yours."

"I want to help out with the bills," I said, softly as I looked up at him. He scowled. "Don't be like that."

"I don't want you to spend your money on bills," grumbled Edward. "I want you to spend your money on things that will make you happy."

I sat up so that I was straddling him. "Edward, it's important for me to be an equal partner in this relationship. For six years, I lived off someone else's money. He made sure I knew that he paid for our house, our food, our clothing. I need to feel like I am paying my part."

"Ok, as much as I don't like it," said Edward. "I understand. How about if we agree to letting me pay for the mortgage, the electric bill, and the cable. They are the most expensive. You can pay the gas, the water, and the house phone. We'll each pay for our own car insurance and split the groceries."

"Deal," I smiled. "Thank you for understanding."

"I would never deny you the privilege of having to pay bills, Bella," laughed Edward. "What kind of boyfriend would I be if I did that?"

"The annoying kind," I teased.

"I'll show you annoying," laughed Edward, ticking my sides.

I squealed as I jumped off of him and took off running into our bedroom. Edward was right behind me. He swept me into his arms and fell onto the bed with me. He rolled so that he was hovering over me, pinning me to the bed. He leaned down and kissed me, softly at first but then harder and more frantic.

Edward was pressing himself down on me and I could feel every bit of him through his shorts. I slid my hand down into his shorts and gripped him in my hand. Fuck, he wasn't wearing underwear. Edward moaned as he pulled his lips from mine all while shifting himself in my hand.

"Bella," he moaned. "Fuck, your hand feels so fucking good."

I pushed Edward over onto his back and tugged his shirt off, tossing it onto the floor. I sat up and pulled my tank top off, letting it join his. I slid my hands down his chest until I reached the top of his cotton shorts. I hooked my fingers inside and shimmed them down. I threw them onto the floor with our shirts and slid off the bed, leaving him laying naked in front of me.

I took a deep breath and pulled my jeans off, followed by my bra and panties. Edward's eyes raked over my naked body, causing me to blush and him to smile bigger. I climbed up on the bed and laid down next to him, wrapping my hand around his cock again.

"Can we try something?" I asked.

"Anything," he moaned.

"Well, I've always wanted to…" I trailed off, feeling incredibly embarrassed.

"What?" he asked, placing his hand on top of mine and stopping me as I stroked him. I looked down at our hands. "If you keep doing that I am going to cum really fast. Now, what were you wanting to try?"

"I've always wondered what it would be like to go down on a guy while he was doing that to me," I mumbled.

"Oh," smiled Edward. "We can do that, if you are sure you want to."

"I do," I said, eagerly.

"Ok, move over here and straddle my face. It'll be easier," said Edward, lying flat on his back.

I let go of his cock and moved so that my knees were on either side of his head. Edward gripped my thighs in his hands and pulled me down into his lips. Fuck, I would never get tired of feeling him on me like that. I leaned down and gripped his cock in my hand again. I stroked him a few times, letting my hand run over the head of his cock.

"Bella," moaned Edward, bucking his hips up. "Please baby."

I smiled inwardly as I leaned down and slid the head of his cock in between my lips and let him slide into my mouth. Edward's fingers tightened on my thighs as he moaned and thrust his tongue into me. I was resisting the urge to ground my hips down on him but he felt incredible between my legs, like he was made to be there.

I could feel my orgasm already starting to build. I increased my pace on Edward, wanting us to come together. He seemed to sense that as he slid a finger into me. I couldn't stop myself from bucking my hips down onto him. I slid one of my hands down and cupped his balls, tugging on them.

"Bella, fuck," growled Edward.

I moaned as I felt his throaty growl shot through me. Edward tightened his grip around me even more and plunged his face into me, sending me spiraling as my orgasm washed through me. I relaxed my throat and took him all the way in.

"Fuck, move," urged Edward but I ignored him and sucked in my cheek. Edward thrust his hips up as he shot his cum down my throat. "Bella, Bella, Bella."

"That was a-fucking-mazing," I panted, rolling onto the bed next to him.

"You didn't have to swallow," muttered Edward, turning do that he was laying next to me.

"I wanted to," I said, smiling. "Did you like it?"

"Fuck, yes," chuckled Edward, leaning in and kissing me. "I love you and everything about you."

"I love you, too."


	25. Chapter 25

Twenty-five

I woke up the next morning smelling a delicious floral smell wafting in mine and Edward's room. For a split second, I didn't think much about it but then I got to thinking about it. The house didn't have any flowers in it. I hadn't gotten around to turning it from being the classic bachelor pad and giving it a woman's touch yet. There were no open windows to bring the smell into the house, either. So how in the hell did the smell get in here?

I opened my eyes and found my answer. Sitting on the nightstand next to my side of our large bed, was at least two dozen lavender roses. I could feel the tears filling my eyes and spilling down onto my cheeks as I sat up and reached over, pulling out the card that sat in the middle of them.

**B**

**To the strongest, most beautiful woman**

**I've ever known. I love you more and **

**more everyday. **

**E**

I laid the card down on the table and pulled out one of the stemmed roses, bringing it up to my nose. Closing my eyes, I inhaled deeply and took in the sweet aroma. I was most definitely the luckiest woman in the world to have someone like Edward love me. I placed the rose back into the crystal vase and climbed out of the bed and headed into the office where I had left my cell phone the night before. Knowing that Edward was at work, I sent him a text message.

**E-Thank you for the beautiful roses. I love you-B**

**B-I love you more. Have a good first day at work ;)-E**

I smiled as I placed my cell phone back down on the desk. I was starting my first day at the school today. Well, officially anyway. I had gone in a couple days ago and filled out my W-2, insurance forms, and the rest of the mountain of paperwork that came with working. I grumbled about it but I really loved every minute of it.

Today, I was going to meet the rest of the faculty, staff, and try to get my library put together. School started in a week and I wanted my library to be perfect. It was mine, after all, and I wanted it reflect me and who I was now; a strong woman. At least that was what I was telling myself.

After taking a quick but relaxing shower and shoving down a couple of cherry pop tarts, I gathered my stuff up and headed out to my car. I was very nervous as I drove the ten blocks through town to the elementary school. I climbed out of my car and headed across the street and stepped into the school.

"_Mommy, I don't want to go to school," I cried, clinging onto my mother's leg. Renee pulled me off her leg and knelt down in front of me while Charlie stood behind her and smiled at the two of us. _

"_It's going to be ok, Sweetheart," smiled Renee, wiping the tears off my face. "I'm going to be right down the hall from you every single day."_

"_Why can't I be in your class again?" I asked, hiccupping as I cried. "First grade is stupid."_

"_Bella, you are going to love first grade," insisted Renee. "You get to play with Alice and I know that Mrs. Smith is going to love having you in her class."_

"_But won't you need me in your class, Mommy?" I asked, sniffing. _

"_Of course, I will," she said, softly. "But I'll be ok and so will you, Bellabug."_

"Bella?" I turned around and saw Lauren Mallory coming up behind me. She had a huge smile on her face. "Are you ok? You look like you just saw a ghost."

"I'm fine," I said, shaking my head. "What are you doing here?"

"I work here," smiled Lauren as we headed further into the school. "I teach third grade."

"I thought you worked at the grocery store?" I asked.

"I do but that's just so I can make some extra money," sighed Lauren, shaking her head. "I'm saving up to pay for my wedding and I need every cent I can get so I pull double duty."

"You're getting married?" I asked, pulling her to a stop. Lauren smiled as she held up her left hand and showed me the small princess cut diamond that rested on her ring finger.

"Yep, Tyler asked me three months ago," smiled Lauren. "Only nine more nine more months to go and I will officially be Lauren Crowley."

"You and Tyler?" I asked, smiling as I shook my head. "Who would have ever guessed that you two would be all in love with each other?"

"Not me," laughed Lauren, hooking her arm in with mine as we headed down the hallway to the cafeteria. "It's a long, really boring story but one night I was driving back from Amarillo when my car broke down. Tyler gave me a lift into town and asked me to dinner. The rest is history."

"Aw, that's so sweet," I smiled. "I am really happy for you, Lauren. Tyler always was a sweetheart."

"Thanks, Bella," said Lauren as we walked into the cafeteria.

Garrett was standing up in the front of the large group of teachers and teacher's aides. I went to sit with Lauren but Garrett motioned for me to come up to him. I smiled at Lauren before I made my way up to him, feeling every pair of eyes on me. It was very uncomfortable and I found myself fighting the urge to run out of the room, screaming like a maniac. That wasn't normal.

"Hey, Bella," smiled Garrett, placing his hand on my shoulder. Instinctively, I flinched back. He either didn't notice or pretended not to but his hand swiftly fell from shoulder as he looked back at everyone. "For those of you who haven't heard, Harriett retired at the end of last year. I know we will all miss her. This is Bella Swan and she has agreed to take over the library this year so when you get a chance, stop by and introduce yourselves to her, ok?" asked Garrett, looking around.

Everyone murmured their agreement and Garrett motioned for me to join them. I nearly ran as I rushed back and took the seat next to Lauren. She patted me on the back but didn't say anything as Garrett started talking about lunch time rotations, bus schedules, and just about everything else you can think of. It was amazing how much work goes into just getting ready for school to start, not to mention the work that goes on in actually educating the children.

After about an hour, Garrett dismissed everyone but asked me to stay behind. I stayed in my seat while the others slowly trickled out of the cafeteria until it was just me and Garrett. He came over and sat down in front of me and sighed.

"I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable by putting my hand on your shoulder," he said, quietly.

"It's ok," I muttered.

"No, it made you feel uncomfortable and I should have known better," said Garrett. I looked up at him. "I know that you are dealing with a lot, Bella, and I-"

"Damn it, I missed it," yelled a blond woman, rushing into the cafeteria. I narrowed my eyes at her as Garrett turned and smiled.

"It's ok, Baby," smiled Garrett. "Bella, this is my wife-"

"Katie?" I asked, standing up. The blond snapped her eyes over to me and threw her hands up to her mouth.

"Bella?" she gasped. I ran over and jumped into her arms, taking her to the ground with me. "OUCH!"

"I'm sorry, Katie," I laughed, rolling off of her. She sat up, laughing.

"Eh, it's ok, Bella," smiled Kate.

"I'm taking it you know Bella, Kate?" asked Garrett, walking over and offering us both a hand. We let him pull us back up to our feet and Kate threw her arm around my shoulder. I tried to hide my flinch but I wasn't able to.

"Of course I know Bella," snorted Kate, ignoring my flinch. "She's my girl. She and I went to school together."

"Ah, I see," chuckled Garret. "Well, I'll just let you two get caught up."

"Thanks, Babe," winked Kate. Garrett was still laughing as he walked out of the cafeteria. Kate turned and looked at me. "Well, it's been a while."

"Yeah, ten years," I sighed.

"What are you doing here?" asked Kate, leading me out of the cafeteria.

"I'm the new elementary librarian," I said. Kate smiled as she pulled me down a short of flight of stairs and stopped in front of a large wood door.

"Well, then this is yours," she said, pulling open the door and pushing me into the room.

I could feel my smile spreading as I slowly turned and took in my library. It wasn't very big. Maybe fifty feet by fifty feet but it was beautiful. There were at least fifteen bookshelves just crammed with every children's book you could think of and then some. I went over to one of the shelves and ran my hand over the spines of several of the books.

"Pretty nice, isn't it?" asked Kate. I turned and looked back at her, having forgotten that she was standing in the doorway.

"It's incredible," I smiled. "So you work here, too?"

"Yep," she said, stepping into the room. "I teach kindergarten."

"Oh," I murmured. "How long have you been back in Clarendon?"

"A couple of years," said Kate, shrugging her shoulders. "Garrett got the job as principal so I came on as an aide. Then last year an opening came up in kindergarten so I took it."

"That's nice," I said, softly.

"When did you come back?" she asked, quietly. "I thought you were never coming back here again."

"I wasn't planning on it," I sighed, moving over and sitting behind my counter. "I'm surprised you haven't heard the rumors."

"I've been gone all summer," smiled Kate. "I spent the summer up with my sister in Colorado helping her out with her new baby."

"Tanya?" I asked.

Kate nodded her head, "Yes, she has a three year old little boy and just gave birth to a little girl at the beginning of June. Her husband has been deployed over seas for six months so I thought I would go help her," explained Kate.

"That was really nice of you," I smiled. "I can't believe little Tanya has babies."

"You and me both," snorted Kate, leaning over on my desk. "So are you going to tell me why you are here? I though you and your husband were up in Chicago."

"Um, well," I said, taking a deep breath. "Long story, very, very short, I left him after he tried to kill me." Kate gasped. "Our marriage wasn't good…ever and, um, I couldn't stay anymore so I came back home to try to…I don't know, find myself, I guess."

"Oh, Bella," whispered Kate, reaching across the desk and grabbing my hand. "I could kill him for putting his hands on you."

"Too late," I muttered. "Someone already killed him while he was in jail."

"No," gasped Kate. I nodded my head. "Wow."

"I know," I said, standing up. "Part of me is relieved that I don't have to face him anymore but the other part of me, really wanted to make him suffer. Now, his crazy bitch of a mother is after me and…"

"This is shit from like a soap opera," murmured Kate, shaking her head.

"I know, right?" I laughed. "Anyway, I'm doing much better now that Edward and I are together."

"Oh my god, you and Eddie?" squealed Kate, jumping up and down as she clapped her hands.

"You know he hates being called Eddie," I laughed.

"I know," laughed Kate. "I can't believe you two are finally together."

"Yeah, we're living in sin together since Charlie's house got burned to the ground and all," I smiled.

"I am going to have to do some major ass kicking," grumbled Kate. "Nobody told me about you coming home or Charlie's house. When I get my hands on Alice…"

"Oh, don't take it out on the pixie," I laughed.

"I'll think about it," snorted Kate, looking down at her watch. "I had better actually get my ass down to my room and get some work done." Kate pulled me into her arms. "I've missed you, Bella."

"I've missed you, too, Katie," I whispered. "We'll hang out soon, ok?"

"Deal," smiled Kate.

Once Kate left, I started working on getting my library fixed up. I had a huge supply closest that held all sorts of decorations and things that I could use to really make my library stand out. Throughout the day, several of the other teachers stopped by and introduced themselves to me. I was never going to be able to remember all of their names. Each grade had two teachers and an aide. Plus there was pre-kindergarten and headstart as well as your typical kindergarten through fifth grade classes. It was all very overwhelming.

Just after four in the afternoon, I closed up my library and headed back out to my car. I climbed in and drove back to mine and Edward's house. My heart caught in my chest when I saw Charlie's sheriff truck parked in front of the house. I practically jumped out of my car, ran up the porch, and into the house. He and Charlie were sitting in the living room, silently. They both stood up when I came in and looked over at me.

"What's wrong?" I asked, looking between them both.

"Bella, David Newton was found in his home this morning," said Charlie. "He was dead."

"What?" I asked.

"So was Karen Newton," added Charlie.

I stumbled back a couple steps as I tried to process the words that had just came out of his mouth. I looked over at Edward, who stepped up to me and pulled me into his arms just moments before my knees buckled and the darkness took over.


	26. Chapter 26

Twenty-six

I felt something cold dripping onto my forehead. I wasn't sure what it was or why it was dripping on my forehead but it was. I was fixing to say something when the cold drops were replaced by an equally cold wet rag.

"When is she going to come to?" asked Edward. There was a sense of bitterness laced in each word.

"She will come to when she comes to, Edward," sighed Carlisle. I could picture him rolling his blue eyes at his son.

"It's been an hour," grumbled Edward.

"I know how long it's been," said Carlisle, heatedly.

I felt the cold rag get pulled from my forehead only to be replaced but an even colder rag. I reached up and grabbed the rag and threw it across the room, eliciting a hearty chuckle from both Edward and Carlisle. I slowly opened my eyes, squinting against the bright sunlight that was floating through the open window.

"You could have just asked me to stop, you know," whispered Edward.

"I know," I whispered, looking around.

I was laying on the couch in our living room with Edward kneeling down next to me. There was such sadness and worry etched in his eyes. I didn't say anything as I reached up and stroked his cheek in my shaking hand. He reached up and grabbed my hand, pulling it over and placing a gentle kiss on my palm.

I was vaguely aware of Charlie, Esme, Carlisle, Emmett, Rose, Jasper, and Alice, all of whom where situated behind him. They all had equal looks of worry and concern on their faces but I couldn't focus on them. All I could think about was that Edward was here and she was dead. I just wasn't sure if I could be happy or upset. Because while I wanted that crazy bitch dead, I didn't want David dead. He had suffered enough.

"She's really dead, right?" I asked, quietly, keeping my eyes locked on Edward.

"Yes," he whispered. "She's dead."

"She killed him, didn't she?" I asked, feeling the tears start building in my eyes.

"Looks like it he killed her first," whispered Edward, wiping a tear away as it felt. "And then himself."

"Why would he kill himself?" I cried. "He had finally gotten away from her."

"I don't know, love," said Edward, pulling me up against his chest. "I just don't know."

"He didn't deserve to die," I sobbed, softly as I clutched onto the front of his shirt. "He'd been through enough."

"He really had," murmured Edward, shifting back so that he was sitting on the floor with me in his lap with my legs were wrapped around his waist.

Edward held me in his lap until I managed to stop my tears from falling. I just couldn't wrap my head around the fact that she was gone. She couldn't hurt us anymore. Again, part of me was relieved but the other part of me, the angry side of me, was pissed that she got off so fucking easy. When was it her turn to hurt? When was it her turn to suffer the way David and I both had?

I turned my head and laid it against Edward's chest as I looked over at my father. He was standing in front of the large picture window, looking lost. Was he just as angry as I was about everything we had lost because of her? Because of Mike?

"Daddy," I whispered. Charlie turned and looked at me, tears swimming in his eyes. I climbed off Edwards lap and nearly fell into his waiting arms. "Oh, Daddy."

"I know, Honey," he whispered, crying with me.

"He shouldn't have died," I murmured. I felt Charlie stiffen around me and looked up. Apparently, Charlie didn't agree with me. "Dad, he shouldn't have died."

"Yes, he should have," he seethed, pulling back from me. I stared at him with wide eyes. How could he be so callus? "He could have stopped that son of a bitch from putting his hands on you, Bella."

"He was scared," I said, shortly.

"So what?" muttered Esme. I looked over at her. "He could have told you before you married him. He should have told you."

"Ok, so he should have told me," I said. "But do you think I would have listened to him anymore than I did to you, Esme?"

"Probably not," she whispered.

I looked around and noticed that everyone looked just as upset as Esme and Charlie did. Everyone but Edward and Rose. Were they the only ones who were ever going to ever understand me? Was Mike always going to be standing between me and the rest of them?

"Don't any of you understand?" I asked. "He was living in hell."

"He let her hurt him," said Emmett. Rose snapped her head over to him as she stood up and stepped away from him. "Rose-"

"He let it happen?" she asked, heatedly. Emmett stood up and reached for her but she stepped back. "You know nothing about living through hell, Emmett. You think it would have been easy for him to just walk away?"

"No, but-"

"There are no buts," she hissed, backing into the wall. "I thought you understood, Emmet."

"Rose, baby, I do understand," whispered Emmett, stepping to her but she moved away from him. "Rose."

"Did I let him hurt me, Emmett?" asked Rose, letting her tears fall down her face.

"No, of course not," insisted Emmett.

"He hit me and I stayed," cried Rose, dropping to her knees. Emmett moved toward her but I pushed him out of the way as I dropped to my own knees and pulled her into my arms. Everyone else was watching with wide eyes. "He told me it was never going to happen again. He told me that he loved me. I stayed with him until he robbed me of everything. Did I fucking deserve it, Emmett?"

"No," whispered Emmett, dropping down in front of us. He reached for her but she flinched back.

"Don't touch me," she cried.

"Rose-"

"Get out," I whispered. Emmett snapped his head up to me.

"Bella-"

"GET OUT!" I screamed at him. "YOU KNOW NOTHING!"

"Bella, calm down," said Charlie. However, I ignored him as I stood up, pulling Rose up to her feet. I looked back at all of them.

"You know…" I trailed off, shaking my head at them. "Just get out."

I turned and ushered Rose down the hallway to the guest room, kicking the door shut behind me. I heard Edward tell them all to leave, that we needed some time. I pulled Rose over onto the bed and held her as she cried herself to sleep. Tucking her into the bed, I closed the door behind me and headed back out to the living room. Edward was standing in front of the picture window. I went over and wrapped my arms around his waist.

"Is she ok?" he asked, placing his hands on top of mine.

"I don't know," I whispered, laying my head against his back. "Do you agree with them?"

"Yes and no," he murmured. Edward pulled my arms from around him as he turned and leaned against the window. He kept my hands in his as he looked into my eyes. "Do I blame him for part of what you went through? Honestly, I do but I can't imagine how scared he was. He must have felt so alone."

"He was," I whispered, leaning forward and laying my head on his chest. "I do blame him, Edward, but I wouldn't have believed him if he told me that Mike was going to abuse me. I would have laughed in his face and called him a liar."

"I know," murmured, Edward, bringing his arms up and wrapping them around me. "They know it, too, even if they are pissed at him."

"He had just gotten his life back," I whispered. "He was getting his second chance, like I have. Why couldn't she have just left him alone? Why couldn't she had just left us alone?"

"I don't," sighed Edward, leaning his cheek down on the top of my head. "I wish I had the answer for you, love, but I don't."

"I know," I murmured.

Edward and I fell into a comfortable silence, just being together. I knew he didn't understand why I felt the way I did about David Newton. I suppose I could understand his point, all their points, but they didn't live in his shoes. They don't understand just how hard it is to not believe them when they tell you that you are the one making them hurt you.

"Are you hungry?"

"No," I whispered, looking up at him. "I just want to go to bed."

"Ok," he murmured, leaning down and pressing his lips against mine. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I whispered.

Edward and I headed into our room and changed for bed. I brushed my teeth and washed my face before I climbed into the bed. Once Edward had brushed his teeth, he crawled into bed behind me, wrapping his body around mine. I felt him press his lips to the side of my head as I drifted off to sleep.

When I woke up the next morning, I reached for Edward but found myself completely alone. I crawled off the bed and headed out into the living room. Edward and Rose were sitting on opposite ends of the couch, facing each other, and talking.

"When Emmett was little, he used to carry this old stuffed monkey around," smiled Edward. I leaned against the doorframe and just listened. "His name was Super Bob. Emmett carried that thing around everywhere. It was kind of embarrassing. Anyway when I was seven, I had had to have my tonsils out. I was really scared but Emmett told me everything was going to be ok. I asked him how he knew that, he told me that Super Bob was going to protect me. When I woke up in the hospital after the procedure, Super Bob was sitting on the bottom of my bed," laughed Edward.

"Sounds like him," murmured Rose. "But how could he think that anyone deserved what happened to David Newton, Edward?"

"He doesn't," said Edward, reaching over and grabbing her hand. "He's not very good with his expressing himself. Rose, you are the first woman he has ever loved. I think it scares him."

"It scares me, too," cried Rose.

Edward pulled Rose over and held her as she cried. I turned back into our bedroom and quietly shut the door behind me. He was the most amazing man I had ever met. I went back over and laid back down on the bed, letting my tears fall down my face. I'm not sure how long I had laid there when I heard the door open and close. The bed dipped down and I felt as Edward wrapped his arms around me, pulling my into his body.

"You ok?" he asked.

"Yeah," I whispered. "I heard you and Rose talking."

"Oh," he said. "I'm sorry. She just needed someone to talk to and I guess I was there."

"I'm not mad, Edward," I smiled, rolling in his arms and facing him. "Quite the opposite, actually."

"But you've been crying," he frowned.

"Because you are an amazing man, Edward, who just surprises me everyday," I said, softly. "Rose needs us…a lot and watching you talk to her…you talk to her like she's Alice, like she's your sister."

"I guess I kind of think about her like a sister," muttered Edward. His ears turned a little pink. "She told me about…him."

"Oh," I whispered.

"I just…" he trailed off, shaking his head as he rolled onto his back. "I don't get men like that, or bitches like Karen Newton. What gives them the right to do that?"

"Nothing," I said, sitting up. "When I first came back here, I thought I had to have done something to deserve it. Maybe I lost my baby because I didn't want it," I cried, pulling my knees up. "Or at least I didn't think I did, Edward. I know now that I didn't ask for him hit me. I didn't do anything to deserve to be hit."

"No, you didn't," smiled Edward, sitting up and bringing his forehead down against mine. "I've been waiting for you to finally believe that."

"I couldn't have gotten here without you," I cried, softly as I brought my hands up and cupped his face. "I love you, Edward."

"I love you, too," he whispered, letting his own tear slip down his face.

I moved my finger over and swiped it away and pressed my lips to his. Just as his alarm went off, of course. Chuckling softly, he pulled his lips away from mine and leaned over and turned it off. He turned back to me and sighed.

"Are you and Rose going to be ok here for alone for a little while?" he asked. "I have a meeting with the dean."

"We'll be fine," I said, softly. "I'll miss you, though."

"I'll miss you, too," murmured Edward, kissing me again.

Edward quickly changed and headed out for his meeting with the dean. I changed into a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt and headed out into the living room. Rose was sitting on the couch with her knees pulled up to her chest and her arms wrapped around them. I didn't say anything as I went over and sat down in front of her, pulling my own knees up.

"I told him everything," whispered Rose.

"I know," I said, reaching out and grabbing her hand. "He told me."

"He's a really great guy, Bella," murmured Rose.

"Yes, he is," I said, agreeing with her. I looked over at her. "So is Emmett, Rose."

"I know," cried Rose. "I know that he didn't mean that I deserved to be…raped, Bella, but…"

"He loves you, Rose," I whispered.

"I love him," she murmured, looking up at me. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure," I smiled.

"Have you and Edward had sex yet?" she asked.

"Um, no," I muttered, blushing bright red. "We've done some stuff but not that."

"Oh," whispered Rose.

"Have you and Emmett?" I asked, quietly.

"No," she murmured. "I wanted to take this slow. You know, to make sure that I was ready."

"Me too," I said, looking out the window. "Sex with Mike was never enjoyable for me. I think I'm a little scared that I won't enjoy it with Edward."

"Bella, did Mike rape you?" asked Rose. I sighed and looked over at her.

"I don't know," I whispered. "When he started hurting me, I tried to refuse to sleep with him but that just made him madder. He never forced himself on me but I realized pretty quickly that he would beat me worse if I refused him. I just made it easier to give in to him, I guess."

Rose opened her mouth to say something but was interrupted when someone knocked on the front door. I climbed off the couch and headed over to the door and pulled it open. There standing in the doorway with an arm full off flowers was Emmett. I looked back at Rose, who had stood up.

"It's ok," she whispered. I stepped out of the way and let him in. I turned and picked up my purse and keys from the small table behind the door.

"I'll just leave you two alone," I said, quietly.

"Bella," mumbled Emmett.

"I know, Em," I whispered, placing my hand on his shoulder. "We'll talk later."

Emmett nodded his head and I left. I climbed into my car and headed out to the cemetery. It's been way too long since I visited my mother. I parked my car and headed over to where she laid to rest. I froze in my tracks when I saw my father sitting there. He looked back at me, tears streaming down his face.


	27. Chapter 27

Twenty-seven

**CHPOV**

After Bella kicked us all out, I headed back down to the station and tried to catch up on work but I couldn't. The look of disgust on my daughter's face was haunting me. Just as I didn't understand how she could be so forgiving, she didn't understand how I couldn't be. David Newton may not have put his hands on my daughter, but he didn't stop that bastard son of his from hurting her. Maybe Bella was right, I just didn't understand.

After a few hours of mindless paper work, I climbed back into my truck and headed back to Carlisle and Esme's house. I wasn't sure what I was going to do now that my house was gone. I couldn't stay here forever. I guess I was going to have to rebuild or something. I just didn't know what I was going to do right now.

I parked my truck in front of the house and made my way inside. Carlisle and Esme were sitting at the dining room table with plates of food in front of them but neither one of them were eating. They both looked up at me and smiled but neither one of their smiles reached their eyes. I went over and plopped down in one of the empty seats and sighed.

"Any word from them?" I asked.

"No," said Carlisle while Esme got up and headed into the kitchen. She came back a moment later with a plate of food.

"You need to eat," ordered Esme, placing the food in front of me.

"I'm really not very hungry," I murmured.

"I don't care if you are hungry or not, Charlie Swan," snapped Esme. My eyes flew open as each word slapped me in the face. Esme was pissed off. "You need to eat. Just let me take care of you."

"Esme," I whispered. She dropped back into her seat and started sobbing.

"I just want to make everything better and all I do with her is mess it up," she sobbed. Carlisle moved around the table and pulled his wife into his arms. I felt the pangs of jealous rip through me. How long had it been since I got to hold my wife in my arms? "Why won't she let me?"

"Esme, she's trying," whispered Carlisle, rubbing her back. "It's just hard for her."

I didn't say anything as I picked up my fork and started eating the meatloaf that Esme had made. Maybe I couldn't help Bella feel better but I'd be damned if I sat here and let Esme cry because I wasn't eating her food. It was the least I could do.

"You don't have to eat, Charlie," whispered Esme, leaning away from her husband and wiping the tears off her face. "I didn't mean to blow up at you."

"I know you didn't," I murmured. "I'm worried about her too, Esme."

"How can she be so…understanding?" she asked as Carlisle moved back to his seat.

"Because Bella knows what David Newton went through," said Carlisle. "It's easier for her to empathize with him because she knows what it's like to be in the receiving end of the abuse."

"Maybe," I muttered, standing up. I picked up my plate and took it into the kitchen, rinsed it off, and placed it in the dishwasher before I went back into the dining room. "But the fact is that he still stood there and let that little son of a bitch hit my daughter. That is just something I can't ever understand or forgive."

I walked out of the dining room without saying another word to Carlisle or Esme. I headed upstairs to the guest room and stripped out of my clothes and took a hot shower. My body was tense and rigid. I dried off and pulled on my pajamas before I climbed into bed. I looked over at the nightstand, wishing the there was a picture of Renee sitting there. If I had been back in my house, there would be.

Did I neglect Bella after her mother passed away? Was I not there enough for her? I know I wasn't the father I should have been but I was trying to make sure we didn't lose the ranch. Suddenly, I found myself having to be both her father and her mother. Did I push her away so far that she fell into the hands of the first asshole that told her he loved her? Did she just not know how much I love her?

As I laid in the bed, I kept questioning every decision I had made since Renee passed away. I thought I was doing what was best for her but maybe I wasn't. Maybe I didn't tell Bella enough that I loved her. Maybe I didn't hold her enough when she cried. Maybe it was my fault that he hurt her.

Just after six in the morning, I got tired of laying there and climbed out of the bed. I changed into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. I made my way through the dark house and outside to my truck. I started it up and headed out to the cemetery. I needed Renee right now. I parked my truck and headed over to her resting place. I fell to my knees in front of her headstone and let my tears fall freely as I traced each letter that had been carved into the black granite headstone.

"Ren," I sobbed, softly. "I don't know what to do. I feel like every time I think I'm finally getting her back that I do something or say something stupid. I don't want to lose her. Not now that she's back. What do I do? Please, Baby, tell me what to do?"

I'm not sure how long I sat there on the ground next to my wife, praying that somehow she would tell me what to do. My tears were falling freely down my face. I knew it wasn't considered manly to cry but I didn't give a shit right now. My daughter was hurting and I couldn't make it better for her. I heard someone coming up behind me and looked back. There stood Bella, worrying on her bottom lip, and fidgeting with the hem of her t-shirt.

**BPOV**

"Are you ok?" asked Charlie, standing up.

"I'm ok," I muttered, quietly. "You?"

"I'm…No, I'm not," he said, honestly. "I'm sorry, Bella. I don't know what to say or do to make this better between us. I just don't understand."

"Of course you don't," I sighed, shaking my head. "Dad, you don't understand because you've never been in my shoes. In David or Rose's shoes."

"You're right, I don't," he muttered, shaking his head. "Help me understand how you can be so forgiving after everything you went through."

"I'm not forgiving," I said, shortly. "I hate Mike for hurting me. For telling me that I was stupid and ugly. I hate him for putting his hands on me and hurting me. I hate Karen Newton because she taught him that was how you handle your spouse. A part of me hates David Newton for allowing it but I also know how scared he was. He didn't need my guilt, Dad, because he was killing himself with his own."

"He could have left," argued Charlie. "I'm not saying it would have been easy for him but he could have done it."

"You're right, he could have," I admitted. "But he didn't because part of him thought he deserved what he got."

"Is that how you feel?" asked Charlie. "Like you deserved what Mike did to you?"

"I did," I muttered, folding my arms around my torso.

"But why would you feel that way?" he asked.

"Because he told me everyday how I was stupid, lazy, fat, ugly." I frowned as I looked up at my father. "I didn't think anyone other than Mike would love me, Dad. I let him brainwash me into thinking that he was as good as I was ever going to get. I know that's not true now but when you are told how stupid you are for six years, you start to believe it. When you are told that you are the reason he is hitting you, you start to accept it."

"But you shouldn't have had to," argued Charlie.

"I know that now, Daddy," I cried. "But I didn't know that then."

"Did I just not tell you enough that I loved you?" he asked.

"Of course, you did, Dad," I gasped.

"Then how could you have believed him?" he asked.

"I don't know," I replied, angrily. "I've asked myself that question every day, Dad, but I still don't know how I believed that when he hurt me that he was doing it because I asked him to. It's fucked up and crazy but that's what I thought!"

"Do you still think that?" he asked.

"No, I don't," I said, quietly.

"Well, I guess that's…something," sighed Charlie, looking back at my mother's headstone. "She would know what to do."

"Maybe," I murmured, moving over and standing next to my father. I slipped my hand into his. "I miss her."

"I miss her, too," he whispered, tightening his grip on my hand.

"Dad, I'm sorry for getting so upset with you last night," I murmured. "I wasn't mad at you; just pissed off in general. Sometimes it feels like just when I am getting my life straight, something or someone has to come along and ruin it."

"This is just a minor set back, Honey," said Charlie, wrapping his arms around me. "I know that I don't tell you this enough but I do love you, Bella. I am so proud of how hard you've worked."

"Thank you," I smiled, looking up at him.

"I don't mean just lately, either," said Charlie, smiling as he looked down at me. "You've always been a hard worker. Not many kids around here get full rides to ivy league universities but you did. Maybe I didn't support you the way I should have when you left but I was proud of you."

"You were?" I asked.

"I still am and I always will be," whispered Charlie.

"Thank you, Daddy," I cried, softly, hugging him as tightly as I could. "I needed to hear that."

"I'll try to say it more," whispered Charlie.

"Dad?" I asked, sniffing as I looked up at him. "Mom would have said the same thing to me. You're doing a good job handling all of this."

"I needed to hear that," murmured Charlie, kissing the top of my head. "I'd better get to work."

"Ok," I said, softly.

Charlie walked me back to my car before heading back the other way to where his truck was parked. I started my car up and headed back into town. I pulled my car up into the driveway, parking next to Edward's Volvo. He was sitting on the front porch, book propped up in his lap. I climbed out of my car and headed up to him.

"Hey, when did you get home?" I asked.

"Ten minutes ago," smiled Edward, pulling me down into his lap. "Emmett and Rose are still talking so I thought I would read out here for a while. Give them some more time to work everything out. Where did you go?"

"I went to see my mom," I said, quietly. "Charlie was there."

"Oh, did you two talk?" he asked.

"Yeah, I don't think he really understands anymore than he did before hand but maybe that's ok," I said, nestling myself in his arms. "Maybe he doesn't need to understand why I feel the way I do but just accept it."

"Maybe," whispered Edward, pressing his lips against mine. "At least you talked and that's a step, right?"

"Right," I smiled, softly.

A moment later the front door to the house opened and Rose and Emmett came out, hands intertwined and smiles laying on their lips. They both had red eyes and tear strains on their cheeks but they had never looked better, or more in love with each other than they did in this moment. I knew that as long as they continued to talk openly with each other, they would be ok.

"Bella-"

"It's ok, Em," I said, smiling at him.

"No, it's not," he sighed, letting go of Rose's hand and moving over to me. He pulled me off of Edward's lap and hugged me. "I was angry and I let my anger speak for me. I just don't always know how to deal with this and I made a mistake. I need you to know I am so, so sorry and I will try not to be such an ass ever again."

"Aw, Emmett," I whispered, letting a tear slip down my face. "You can't help but be an ass. It's just who you are."

"Bella," cried Emmett, dropping his head onto my shoulders. "Please tell me that you forgive me."

"Of course I forgive you, Emmett," I murmured, rubbing his back. "But there really wasn't anything to forgive."

"I should have been more understanding," he murmured. "I should have-"

"I should have done a lot of things, too, Emmett, but I didn't and instead of fretting over them, I have to accept that I made some bad decisions and learn from them. So do you."

"When did you get so fucking smart?" he whispered, pulling back and looking down at me.

"I don't know that I have," I smiled. "I love you, Em, and no matter what, I will never stop needing my big brother, ok?"

"Ok," he whispered, kissing the top of my head. Emmett looked over at Edward, who had stood up. "Thanks, man."

"Anytime," said Edward. He looked over at Rose. "Remember what I told you."

"I will," smiled Rose. "We're going to head home. We'll see you guys later."

"Ok," I said, moving over and hugging her. "You know where I am if you need me, ok?"

"I know," she whispered. "Same for you."

"I know," I said, quietly.

Edward slipped his arm around my waist as we watched Emmett and Rose head down to Emmett's jeep and head back to their house. We headed inside and settled on the couch, just enjoying the quiet that surrounded us. Edward pulled me over so that I was laying on top of him. I yawned as he started running his fingers through my hair. I clutched on him tighter as I drifted to sleep in the arms of the man I loved. The man who loved me.


	28. Chapter 28

Twenty-eight

It's been two days since I was told that David Newton killed his estranged wife before turning the gun onto himself. Two days since I've talked or seen Esme. I knew she was still pissed with me, with life in general. I wasn't sure how to go about things with her. I had pushed her away so many times but every time I did, she tried harder to get me to talk to her. To open up to her. To accept the love she was offering me; a mother's love.

"What are you thinking about?" asked Edward.

He and I were laying in bed early Thursday morning. So early in fact that the sun as just starting to peek over the eastern horizon. He had his arm wrapped around my waist, holding my body into his. We had spent most of the night last night just talking about nothing and everything. Life, dreams, the future. I smiled at the thought of the future I would have with Edward.

"Esme," I said, softly. "I need to go talk to her."

"Yes, you do," murmured Edward. "She's just confused and doesn't want to hurt you. She loves you, Bella."

"I know she does," I whispered, feeling the tears building up in my eyes. I hated that I had hurt her again. All she has done is reach out to me. "I love her, too."

"I know you do," said Edward, pressing his lips to the side of my head. "It'll be ok, love."

"I hope so," I murmured, quietly.

Edward and I laid in bed together for a few more minutes before he climbed out and headed into the kitchen to start the coffee. I climbed off the bed and headed into the bathroom. I started the shower. I stripped off Edward's t-shirt and my panties. I had taken to wearing his shirt to sleep in. As silly as this sounds, I needed to feel closer to him, even though I slept in his arms every night. Silly, I know.

Once the water was the right temperature, I stepped in under the water. I closed my eyes as I let the water run down through my hair, down my back and shoulders. As good as the water felt, my muscles were still tense and rigid. I knew that they would be until I worked everything out with Esme.

I quickly finished showering and dried off. I wrapped my towel around my body and headed back out into mine and Edward's room. I quickly got dressed, pulling on a pair of jeans and an old t-shirt. I ran my brush through my long hand before pulling up into a messy bun and slipped on my flip-flops. I headed out to the kitchen and found Edward standing in front of the stove.

He was shaking his hips to the music pouring out of the radio. I leaned against the doorframe and watched him. Every once in a while I would hear him singing along to the song that was belting out of the speakers. He shook his ass again and spun around. Well, he halfway spun around because as soon as he saw me standing in the doorway, he froze and his eyes flew open. As if that wasn't enough, he blushed the deepest crimson color I had ever seen.

"How long have you been standing there?" he asked, a moment later.

"Long enough to see you shaking your money maker," I said, laughing. Edward rolled his eyes and turned back to the eggs he had been cooking. "Oh, don't be like that. It was good. I wouldn't mind seeing the whole show sometime."

"Yeah?" snorted Edward, pulling the eggs off the stove. "We'll have to see about that."

I giggled as I crossed the room and kissed him, causing him to smile against my lips. I knew I was forgiven for laughing at him. Edward dumped the eggs onto our plates and we ate at the kitchen table. After we were done, I insisted on cleaning the kitchen. Edward pretended to protest but I knew him. He hated doing the dishes but didn't want to seem like he was being a jerk about it. I finished washing everything up and headed out to the living room where Edward was. He was sitting on the couch tying his shoe.

"Where are you going?" I asked. Edward looked up at me and smiled.

"I have a few errands to run," he said, coyly.

"Like what?" I asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

"Like I am not telling you," he smirked, standing up. He came over and stood in front of me. "Just do me a favor."

"What?" I asked.

"Go talk to my mom," he said, seriously. "It's eating you alive and I think you really need to sit down with her."

"Ok," I murmured, laying my head on his chest. "I know you're right."

"Thank you," he sighed, clearing relieved that I wasn't going to argue with him. "I will be back by five."

"I love you," I smiled.

"I love you, too," he said, returning my smile.

Edward kissed me before he headed out of the house. I went over to the window and watched him pull his car out of the driveway and drive off down the street. Sighing, I turned from the window and walked over to where my purse and keys laid. After hesitating for just a moment, I picked them both up and headed out to my car.

I climbed in behind the wheel. I took a deep breath as I started my car up, pulled out of the driveway, and headed to Esme's house. I pulled up in front of the large white house a few minutes later. I took another deep breath as I climbed out of the car and headed up to the porch. My hand shook as I reached over and pressed the doorbell.

A moment later, the door was pulled open not by Esme but by Carlisle. He looked tired and worn out. Guilt seeped into me as I wondered if that was my fault or if I was still welcomed here. However, when he smiled and stepped back to let me into the house, I thought that I might be wrong.

"How are you holding up?" he asked, shutting the door behind me.

"I'm ok," I said, quietly.

"Well, that's good," murmured Carlisle, before clearing his throat. "I'm sorry for not…"

"Carlisle, do you remember that day in your office?" I asked. "When I first came back?"

"Of course, I do," said Carlisle.

"I was ashamed for you to see me like that," I whispered, eyes filling up with tears. "Seeing me broken and used. I didn't want to be a disappointment to you, too."

"I could never be disappointed in you, Bella," said Carlisle, wrapping his arms around me. I laid my head on his chest as I let my tears fall.

"I'm sorry I pushed you away when you only wanted to help," I murmured.

"Maybe I pushed too hard," whispered Carlisle. "I wanted to make you feel better like I did when you were little. I wanted to be able to just kiss the wound and put at bandage on it like I would when you were scrape your knee but I couldn't do that this time. The wounds were too deep and I felt so hopeless."

"I did too," I cried, wrapping my arms around his chest. "I wanted to die."

"What?" he gasped.

"I know what David Newton was feeling because I wanted to die, too," I whispered. "I hated myself for putting myself in his hands for six years. I hated myself for not wanting that baby, Carlisle," I sobbed.

"Oh, sweetheart," murmured Carlisle, tightening his hold on me.

"I hate him for making me think it was my fault," I whimpered. "It wasn't my fault. I didn't deserve it."

"It's about time you believed that," whispered Esme.

I pulled away from Carlisle and looked over at her. She was standing at the bottom of the stairs, hand placed over her heart. I ran across the room and threw myself into her arms. We crumbled to the ground as we both shook with violent sobs.

"I'm so sorry, Bella," she wept.

"No, I'm sorry, Esme," I cried. "I just don't want to lose you, too. You're the only mom I have left and I need you so much."

"Come with me," whispered Esme, standing up.

I let her pull me back into my feet and led me up the stairs. She held my hand as she led me down to her bedroom. Esme pushed the door open and motioned for me to go in. I was confused but I did it. The floor of her bedroom was covered with boxes and old photos. I looked back at Esme as she shut the door behind us.

She pulled on my hand, urging me to follow her over to the small amount of carpet that was clear. We sat down and she reached out and picked up a picture. She took a deep breath before she looked over at me and placed the picture in my hand. I looked from her down to the picture in my hand and gasped.

"Esme," I whispered.

Sitting in my hand was a picture of my mother and I. I couldn't have been more than a few days old. Renee had the biggest smile on her face as she snuggled me up to her chest. I could feel the tears pouring down my face as I looked up at the amazing woman sitting next to me.

"I took this the day she and Charlie brought you home from the hospital," explained Esme. "You were four days old and they were so happy, sweetheart."

"You have no idea…"I trailed off as I cried.

"I have more," said Esme, picking up another one. "This was your first Christmas…"

Esme explained that Charlie and Renee had brought me over to their house so we could all celebrate Christmas together. She said that Edward sat next to the playpen while I slept and kept shushing Emmett every time he came close to me. The picture was of Charlie and Renee sitting in front of the Cullen's Christmas tree. Charlie was holding me this time. The look of pure joy on his and Renee's faces made me smiled, even if I was crying at the same time.

Esme and I spent the afternoon going through all the pictures she had of me and my parents. Some of them were of just me and Renee, like the one of her holding me in the pool out at the country club. I was maybe two years old and I had on a little yellow bikini. There were arm floaties on my arms and a huge smile on my face. Renee's smile was radiant and beautiful.

Some of the pictures were of me and Charlie. My favorite one was of the two of us at Halloween when I was five. I was sick and couldn't go trick or treating with Edward, Emmett, and Alice. Charlie came in and had me put my costume on anyway. He scooped me out of bed and took me over the Cullen's house. He and I sat on the front porch and passed out candy to everyone who came up.

There were pictures of me, Charlie, and Renee for every birthday, Christmas, and Thanksgiving, that we had spent together. For every Fourth of July celebration we had attended together. Some of the pictures had just me and my parents while others had me and Alice or me and Edward with them. There were even a handful with me and Emmett together.

By the time, I made it through the stack of photos my tears had run dry. I placed the pictures on the floor and looked up at Esme, struggling to find the words to tell her just how much I needed to see these pictures. I brought my hand up and placed it on my chest and took a deep breath.

"Esme," I whispered. "Thank you so much for finding these. I…I really needed to see her. I miss her so much."

"I do too," said Esme, wiping a tear off her face. "Renee was my best friend, Bella. She was my sister, my partner in crime," cried Esme. I reached out and grabbed her hand. "There hasn't been a day that goes by that I don't miss her. That I don't think about her."

"Me either," I cried.

"You look so much like her," murmured Esme, bringing her free hand up and wiping my tears way. "Every time you smile, I think of her. I know it's hard right now, Bella, but she would be proud of how hard you have worked over the last few months to get your life back."

"You think so?" I asked, sniffing back my tears.

"Oh, yeah," smiled Esme. "I know I am proud of you. I may not understand how you feel or why you feel a certain way, but I will never stop loving you, sweetheart."

"I love you, too, Esme," I said, returning her smile. I looked over at the clock and noticed that it was almost five. "I had better get going."

"Ok," said Esme, picking up the stack of pictures. "These are yours."

"You should give them to my dad," I said, quietly.

"I have pictures for him too," smiled Esme. "These are yours."

"Thank you," I whispered, taking the pictures from her.

I hugged her once again before I made my way out to my car. I placed the photos on the seat next to me and headed back to mine and Edward's house. I can't believe that Esme had all of those pictures of my mom. I pulled my car into the driveway, next to Edward's car. I grabbed the photos and headed into the house.

I stopped in the doorway, however, when I saw two suitcases sitting next to the couch. I closed the door and looked around for Edward but he wasn't in the living room. I walked into the bedroom just as Edward walked out of the bathroom with an arm full of his toiletries. Panic filled me as I looked from him to the products in his hands and back to his face.

"Hey," he said, smiling. However, his smile dropped as I dropped the stack of pictures in my hand. "Bella, what's wrong?"

"I won't do it again," I whispered, frantically.

"Do what?" he asked, dropping the objects in his arms on the bed and rushing over to me. "Bella, talk to me."

"Don't leave me," I whispered.

"What?" he asked.

"Don't leave me," I cried, grabbing the front of his shirt. "Please don't leave me."

"I'm not leaving you," he said, quickly.

"Then why are you packing?" I asked.

"I thought we could take a trip," he said, slowly. "You know, before the semester starts and everything."

"A trip?" I asked.

"Yes," he whispered, bringing his hand up and stroking my cheek. "I thought you could use the break."

"You're not leaving me," I sighed, closing my eyes.

"I am not leaving you," murmured Edward. "Ever."

"I'm sorry," I muttered. "I just saw the suitcases and the stuff in your arms…"

"I just wanted to surprise you," said Edward, smiling at me. "Guess that wasn't very smart, huh?"

"No, I just…" I trailed off and shook my head. "So a trip, huh? Are you going to tell me where we are going?"

"No," smirked Edward, shaking his own head. I narrowed my eyes at him. "Don't look at me like that. I promise that you are going to enjoy every minute of it."

"Ok," I sighed, smiling at him. "When do we leave?"

"As soon as I finish packing," chuckled Edward, leaning in and kissing me. "And don't worry about your dad. I already talked to him and let him know we were going to be out of town for a few days."

"Thank you," I smiled. "Can I help at all?"

"Nope," he said, popping the p. "I've got it all under control."

"Ok."

Edward kissed me once more before he went back over and started packing up the toiletries he had dropped on the bed. I knelt down on the floor and picked up all the photos I had dropped. I placed them in the top drawer of my dresser. They would be safe there until I could get a photo album to put them in.

Edward finished packing everything and we headed out to my car. Edward placed both bags in the trunk and held his hand out of my keys. He was smirking as I rolled my eyes and dropped them in his hand. Good thing I love that man and trust him with my life. We climbed into the car and headed out of town to our weekend alone.


	29. Chapter 29

Twenty-nine

When I woke up the next morning nestled in Edward's strong arms, I couldn't stop the smile that crept up on my face. Not that I wanted to because I certainly didn't. I loved waking up in Edward's arms, feeling his breath on the back of my neck. However, that was not why I was smiling this morning.

After spending a few hours in the car, I figured out where Edward was taking me. We had just driven through Dalhart and were headed toward the New Mexico state line. I knew the only reason we would be going this way was to be on our way to the beautiful state of Colorado. One look at the smile on Edward's face confirmed it.

So after another five hours in the car, we pulled up in front of the small cabin that Edward had reserved for us in Manitou Springs, Colorado, a small town that is located at the base of Pikes Peak and just four miles from Colorado Springs. Even though I was dead tired and ready for bed, I was so excited that I squealed like Alice does when she goes shopping. I loved Colorado. Charlie and Renee used to bring me up here nearly every summer. It was our place and the fact that Edward understood that, well, that just makes him even more of a keeper.

"What time is it?" murmured Edward, pressing his lips to the back of my neck. I looked over at the clock.

"Half past eight," I murmured. I rolled in his arms so that I was facing him. "What are we doing today?"

"What do you want to do?" he asked, smiling at me. "We can go to the Garden of the Gods or Cave of the Winds. How about if we go up to The North Pole?"

"No," I laughed, shuddering at the memory of being taken there as a child. "I'm still not convinced that Santa isn't just a peeping tom."

"That's absurd," snorted Edward. "But ok, we won't go to see Santa."

"Can we go to the Seven Falls?" I asked, batting my lashes at him. "It was always my favorite place to go."

"Of course we can," smiled Edward. "How about if we grab some breakfast somewhere first?"

"Ok," I said, quietly.

Half an hour later, Edward and I had both showered and dressed. I was wearing a pair of jeans, a grey t-shirt, and a pair of tennis shoes. Edward was wearing jeans, a University of Texas t-shirt, and a pair of tennis shoes. I pulled my long hair up into a messy bun and followed him out to my car. Edward drove down to the closest Dunkin Donuts and I might have squealed again. I hadn't eaten at a Dunkin's in twenty years or so. Charlie, Renee, and I always stopped here at least one and got donuts on our trips here.

"What are you thinking about?" asked Edward. He and I were sitting in a booth in the back of the small donut shop, a donut and a cup of coffee in front of us.

"My mom," I said, softly. "We used to always come here when I was little. She and Charlie would argue over who had better donuts but it never mattered because Charlie always brought us here."

"I know. Charlie told me to bring you here," said Edward. I looked up at him. "I wanted to bring you somewhere that you had good memories of. Charlie told me to bring you here."

"Thank you for listening to him," I smiled. "I love you."

"I love you, too," he murmured, leaning in and pressing his lips to mine. "Now, are you ready for some fun?"

"Yep," I cheered. "Let's go to the Garden of Gods first and then to the Seven Falls later."

"Your wish is my command," said Edward, laughing as he slid out of the booth.

I laughed with him as I climbed out of the booth and followed him back out to my car. Edward drove us back the other direction and down to the Garden of Gods. I had always loved coming here when I was a kid. I thought the red rocks looked huge. Of course, some of them still did but when you are six years old, everything looks humongous.

"Did you bring a camera?" I asked, looking over at the man I loved.

"Yes, it's in the glove box," said Edward.

"Pull over," I instructed.

Edward cocked an eyebrow but didn't say anything as he pulled the car over onto the shoulder of the narrow road. I grabbed the camera out of the glove box and climbed out of the car. I led Edward across the road to the large formation of rocks. There was a large boulder laying on top of two smaller boulders, making a little bridge under the big one.

"Ok, stand under the rock," I said, gesturing to it. "I want to take your picture."

"I don't like having my picture taken," whined Edward. I just stared at him. "Fine, but the next one is of you."

"Yeah, yeah," I scoffed, waving him off.

Edward pretended to grumbled but moved up where I told him to go. Once he was in position, he smiled my favorite crooked smile and I snapped the picture. That man had no clue what he does to me. He ran back to me and pulled the camera out of my hands.

"Your turn, love," he said, innocently. However as soon a my back was turned he slapped my ass.

"Perv," I laughed, rubbing my ass as I moved up into position.

"You love me for it," he hollered, pulling the camera up to his eyes. I smiled and he took the picture. "Beautiful."

"Ok, let's on to the next one," I laughed.

Edward and I spent the next two hours in the Garden of the Gods. We took the silliest pictures of each other. My favorite one of Edward was him under this boulder, looking like he was pushing it up. He looked so sexy with his muscles straining as he tried to make it look believable. How did I get so lucky as to have such a sexy boyfriend?

He told me his favorite picture of me was of me sitting on the top of one of the large boulders. He said the way sunlight bounced off me was incredible. I wasn't sure I believed him but it was the sweetest, most romantic thing I had ever heard. The two of us ended up making out in the middle of the road for several minutes when I threw myself on him. It wasn't until a car came up to us and honked that we realized we were indeed making out in the middle of the road.

Other pictures were of us standing on the smaller boulders or just in front of the large sheet of red rock that stood in the middle of the national park.

"Can we stop by the gift shop?" I asked, climbing back into my car. "I want to get something for Charlie."

"Of course we can," smiled Edward, starting the car. "You don't have to ask me, Bella. Just tell me where you want to go."

"Habit, I guess," I muttered.

"I know, just a small reminder that I will not tell you what you can or cannot do," said Edward, quietly.

He started the car and headed back up the road to the gift shop. He pulled up into the parking lot and the two of us climbed out. Edward slipped his hand into mine as we headed inside. I couldn't stop the smile that slipped up on my face for the hundredth time today. It was exactly like I remembered it to be.

There were the typical things you would find at the places like these. Cheap costume jewelry that would turn your skin green, postcards, t-shirts, and calendars. There was a large collection of knifes and guns, dishes, and posters. Edward and I wandered over to the toy selection. I could remember spending what felt hours trying to pick something to buy. Usually I would pick one of the little Indian girl dolls. I must had at least ten of them at one point.

"What do you think Charlie would like?" asked Edward, slipping his arm around my waist.

"I don't know," I said, shrugging my shoulders. "Maybe a t-shirt."

"Ok, let's go look at them," smiled Edward, leading me over to the shirts.

There t-shirts in just about every color sitting on the shelves. Some of them were pretty plain, just the Garden of God's logo on them. Others were just plain silly. I picked up one for Charlie that had a bear on it with the end of a fishing line in it's mouth. The person on the other end of the pole looked freaked out. I couldn't resist that one. We picked one up like that for Carlisle, Emmett, and Jasper too. For Esme, Rose, and Alice we picked up pink t-shirts that had the logo on them. I knew that Alice would more than likely not wear hers but I still wanted to get it for her.

Once I paid for the shirts, ignoring Edward's scowl when I insisted on buying them all, he and I headed back out to my car. We stopped and grabbed a quick lunch at a small sandwich shop in Manitou Springs before heading up the mountain towards the Seven Falls. I had always enjoyed the drive up to the Seven Falls. It was like leaving the city behind and entering a world of make believe.

Edward parked the car and we headed up the small road until we reached the falls. There was a small bridge that crossed over the stream that lead away from the falls. If you looked up you could see the seven different falls that all mixed together to make the one large one.

"Do you want to go up to the observation deck?" he asked, looking down at me.

"Can we walk up the steps?" I asked, cocking an eyebrow at me. He scrunched up his face as he looked from me to the two hundred plus steps that led up the face of the mountain to Inspiration Point.

"Ok, but I am holding you responsible I hurt myself," said Edward, smiling at me.

"You'll be fine," I teased. "Just because you are thirty doesn't mean you are old…or does it?"

"Ouch, baby, that hurts," he said, pretending to pout. I laughed softly as I wrapped my arms around him. I leaned up and pressed my lips against his.

"I'm so sorry, honey," I whispered.

"Yeah, yeah," he chuckled, kissing me again. "Ok, let's get this done with."

"It won't be so bad," I giggled.

"Whatever you say, love," smiled Edward.

It took me and Edward nearly an hour to walk up the two hundred and twenty-four steps that led to the top. Mostly because Edward kept stopping after every twenty steps or so to regain his breath. I tried not to tease him too much about being so out of shape but I had to get a couple of jibes in there. He would pretend to be mad just to get me to kiss him. After the third time, I realized the only reason he was stopping was so that I would kiss him. He was such a little cheater.

We finally made it to the top and looked around. The view was breathtaking. We could see the entire city before us. The sun was starting to set leaving a soft orange glow hanging over the city. Edward moved up behind me and wrapped his arms around me. I leaned my head against the side of his as we watched the sun setting over the city.

"Beautiful," I whispered.

"Yes, you are," murmured Edward. I turned in his arms and looked at him. He brought his hand up to my cheek. "You are so beautiful."

"You make me feel beautiful, Edward," I said, leaning into his hand. I could feel the tears building in my eyes. "I love you so much."

"As I love you," smiled Edward, leaning in and pressing his lips down onto mine.

I slipped my arms around his body and pulled him closer to me. As close as I could, anyway. Edward's arms encircled me as he brought one hand up to the back of my head. My lips parted as Edward brushed his tongue along them, silently pleading with me to let him in. I fisted his t-shirt in my hands as we kissed.

"Ahem."

Edward and I both froze before we pulled our lips away from each other's and looked at the woman standing next to us. She was a tall, thin woman with dark brown hair that had just a few strains of grey hair running through it. Standing next to her was a man, who was a little taller than she was. He had salt and pepper hair and an amused smile on his face.

"We don't mean to interrupt but we would hate for you to…get carried away up here," she smiled, looking around. There were a couple of families on the other side, glaring at us. "They don't seem to find young love nearly as sweet as we do."

"Oh, we are so sorry," I muttered, feeling my face turn bright red.

"Don't be embarrassed, my dear," the man next to her said, laughing. "We were young and in love once too."

"We're still in love, you old coot!" exclaimed the woman, swatting him on the shoulder before turning and looking at us. "Let me guess. Newlyweds?"

"Not yet," said Edward, slipping his arm around my waist. "But soon, I hope."

"I like that attitude, young man," she smiled while I blushed.

"Well, we'll just leave the two of you alone," smiled the woman, looking from Edward to me. "Have a happy life together."

"We will," said Edward.

After the man and his wife left, Edward and I headed back down the staircase. It didn't take us nearly as long to make our way back down as it did to go up. OF course, I was also a little distracted. Edward said that he hopefully soon we would be married. Was I ready to someone's wife again?

After a quick stop in the gift shop, where Edward insisted on buying me a set of wind chimes that had little butterflies on them, we headed back down to my car. We climbed in and Edward headed back down the mountain.

"Are you mad at me?" he asked. I looked over at him.

"No," I said, shaking my head at him. "Why would I be mad at you?"

"I don't know," he said, "but you are acting like you are."

"I'm not. I just…" I said, trailing off. "Did you mean what you said?"

"About what?" he asked.

"About us being married soon," I whispered.

I heard Edward take a deep breath but he didn't say anything as he drove us back to the cabin. I was worried that I had upset him by questioning him but he was the one who always told me that I should feel free to call him on anything he said. Did I push it too far this time? Edward parked the car in front of the cabin but didn't say anything.

"Bella, I'm going to be completely honest with you," he said, after a moment. "I want to marry you. I want you to be my wife and to wake up every morning knowing that you are my wife. I want to slip a ring on your finger so that the whole world knows that you said yes to me. But I will not ask you until I know that you are ready to be my wife. I will not rush you into it or pressure you into it."

"Edward," I whispered, shaking my head.

"Talk to me, love," he said, quietly. I took a deep breath and looked up at him.

"I don't know how to be a good wife," I whispered, letting a tear slip down my face.

"Bella, the problem was never that you weren't a good wife," said Edward, reaching over and gently wiping the tear off my face. "The problem was he was never a good husband. He didn't cherish you the way you deserved to be cherished. I will not rush you. Even if that means we are never married. As long as I have you, I will be happy."

"You say that now," I muttered, looking down at my feet. "But what about in a year? Two years?"

"I'll still be waiting," murmured Edward, turning my face up to look at him. "I've loved you all my life, Bella. I will love you for the rest of my life as well."

"I love you, too," I whispered. "Edward?"

"Yes, love?" he asked.

"I want you to make love to me…now," I whispered, softly. So softly in fact that I wasn't sure he would actually hear me.

"Are you sure you are ready for that?" he asked.

"Yes," I said, louder. "I love you and I want to be yours completely."

Edward didn't say anything as he climbed out of the car. He came around and opened my door for me, offering me his hand. I placed my hand in his and let him help me out of the car. He kept my hand in his as we headed inside the cabin. He flicked on the lamp next to the bed and looked back at me. I could see the fear that he was pushing me too far but I knew we were ready for this.

I reached down and gripped the hem of my t-shirt. I kept my eyes locked on his as I pulled the shirt over my head and dropped it to the floor next to me. Edward pulled his shirt off, tossing it on the floor next to mine. He crossed the room so that he was standing in front of me.

"Are you sure?" he asked.

"I'm sure," I whispered. "Just go slow."

"If you want me to stop…" he trailed off.

"I trust you," I murmured.

Edward leaned down and captured my lips with his, wrapping his arms around me. His hands slid down to my ass. He lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist. Edward carried me over to the bed and laid me down, climbing on next to me. He pressed his lips against mine once more before moving them down my neck to my breast. He looked up as me as he reached for the front clasp of my bra.

I nodded my head for him to continue. Edward looked down as he pulled the clasp and released my breasts from their lacy confines. I pulled the bra off and threw it across the room. Edward leaned down and took my nipple in his mouth, like it was the first time he had ever seen it or tasted my skin. I moved my hands up to his hair, fisting it in-between my fingers. His mouth felt incredible on me.

Slowly, Edward kissed his way down my stomach until he reached the top of my jeans. He popped the button and lowered the zipper. I lifted my hips up so he could pull my pants off. He tossed them and my panties on the floor, leaving me completely naked in front of him. He raked his eyes over my body and I flushed bright red.

"So fucking beautiful," he murmured.

It was almost like he didn't even realize that I could hear him. Edward ran his hands up my legs to my thighs. He looked up at my face as he gently pushed my legs apart. Even though it wasn't the first time Edward had seen me naked or been between my legs like this, I still felt vulnerable with him. Edward kept his eyes locked on mine as he reached up and ran a finger along my wet lips.

"Edward," I moaned. "I need you now."

"Are you sure?" he asked.

"Yes," I whispered.

Edward nodded his head as he climbed off the bed and stripped off the rest of his clothes. He moved over to his suitcase and dug around inside of it. He turned back and held up the box of condoms he had brought with him. I cocked an eyebrow at him.

"Just wanted to be prepared," he muttered, blushing a light pink.

"I'm glad one of us was," I said, smiling at him.

Edward laughed nervously as he came back over to the bed. He ripped open the box, sending condoms flying everywhere. He muttered, "Fuck," under his breath as he tried to gather them all back up. I reached out and grabbed his arm, causing him to look up at me.

"It's ok," I said, softly.

"I just wanted this to be perfect," he muttered, climbing on the bed and laying down next to me.

"It is," I smiled. I pulled the condom out of his hand and moved so that I was straddling his legs. "I love you. You love me. That's what matters."

"You're right," he whispered.

I ripped open the condom and slowly rolled it down his cock. He moaned and pushed his head back into the mattress. I moved over and lined him up with my entrance. Edward's eyes flew down to his cock and he watched as I slowly slid down and took him inside of my body.

"So fucking tight," he moaned, moving his hands to my hips.

"You feel so fucking good inside of me," I murmured, moving up and sliding back down. He filled me in a way that I had never been filled before. "Oh, God, it's amazing."

Edward rolled us so that he was hovering over me He reached down and grabbed my thigh, pulling my leg over his hip as he deepened his thrusts into me. I hooked my other leg around his leg. With each thrust of his hips, I could feel him pushing into me deeper and deeper. Edward's eyes were locked on mine.

"Bella, oh, Bella," he moaned. "It's better than I had ever imagined it could be."

"For me too," I groaned. "I'm so close, Edward. Please don't stop."

Edward started thrusting into me harder and faster. I could feel my orgasm building, winding tightly deep in my gut. Edward slipped his hand in between us and pressed hid thumb down on my clit. I arched my back into him as I was overcome by my orgasm.

"FUCK!" I screamed, clutching onto him. Edward started thrusting frantically and I knew he was getting close to his own release.

"BELLA," he growled, slamming into me once more.

Edward rolled off of me, climbed off the bed, and headed into the bathroom. He came back a moment later and I realized he had disposed of the condom. He climbed back onto the bed next to me and pulled me into his arms. I smiled as I laid my head on his chest.

"That was incredible," I whispered.

"That's an understatement," he chuckled. I looked up at him.

"Thank you," I said, quietly.

"For what?" he asked.

"For everything," I said. "Thank you. You saved me from so much. I love you."

"I love you, too," he smiled. "I should be thanking you."

"For what?" I asked, thoroughly confused.

"Silly girl, for letting me love you," he said, softly. "You saved me just as much as I saved you."


	30. Chapter 30

Thirty

EPOV

Waking up on our second morning in the mountains with Bella's warm, naked body wrapped around mine, was perfect. When I decided that we needed to take a trip, I hadn't planned for us to take this step in our relationship. I mean, I wanted to. God, did I want to but I wasn't going to rush her. The only reason I brought the condoms in the first place was because I wanted to be prepare but after everything she had been through over the last week, I hadn't expected it. Feeling her take me into her body like that…there are no words to explain just how good it felt. It was like for the first time in my entire life, I was were I was supposed to be.

"Edward," murmured Bella, rolling from her stomach and onto her side. She leaned her body back into mine, rubbing her ass against me, and my cock was immediately at attention. "Oh, Edward."

God, she was going to kill me with the sleep talking. The first time I heard her say my name in her sleep was the night of the fire. She had spent the entire night asking for her father. I had spent the entire night holding her as close to me as I could. The sun had just started to rise when I heard it. She whispered my name and told me that she loved me. Even though she had just told me a handful of hours before, I felt my heart skip with joy. It still did every time I heard those three little words trickle through her lips.

"What time is it?" asked Bella, stretching out in the bed like a cat. I was distracted with the way the sheet pulled off of her breasts, leaving them uncovered for me to ogle. "Hey, perv, my eyes are up here."

"I know," I smirked, rolling over so that I was hovering over her. I leaned down and sucked one of her nipples into my mouth.

"Oh, fuck, Edward," moaned Bella. I released her nipple and looked up at her.

"I love your boobies, baby," I murmured. "They are perfect."

"You do, huh?" she asked, sliding her legs around the back of my legs and pulling me down onto her. The tip of my erection was pressing right against her wet sex. All it would take was a little move with my hips and I could be sheathed inside of her. "I love your cock, baby. Especially when you are inside of me."

"Fuck, Bella," I moaned, dropping my head into the crook of her neck. "Are you too sore?"

"No," she said, quickly. Lifting my head, I narrowed my eyes at her. "I promise."

I didn't say anything as I leaned down and kissed her once. I reached over the nightstand and picked up a condom. Sitting back on my heels, I rolled the condom on, stifling my moan. I was rock hard and throbbing. I leaned back up so that I was hovering over Bella. Keeping my eyes locked on hers, I slowly pushed into her. Closing my eyes, I paused as I felt her warmth wrap around, bringing me home.

"It's like I was meant to be inside of you," I whispered.

"You were," murmured Bella, hooking her legs around the back of my legs. She pulled me down so that the weight of my body was completely on her. "Can't you feel how our bodies fit perfectly together? We were made for each other. It just took us awhile to figure it out."

I crushed my lips down on hers as I started moving my hips back and forth. Our lips moved together in perfect unison with the movements of our bodies. We weren't having sex. We weren't even really making love. It was more than that, deeper than that. It was like every time our bodies moved, we were dancing together, breathing together, loving together.

"Oh, Edward," cried Bella, breaking her lips away from mine as she was overcome by her orgasm.

"Bella," I grunted, letting go of mine and releasing into the latex that was coving me.

I pulled out of her and slipped the condom off. I headed into the bathroom and deposited it in the trash can, after wrapping it in toilet paper. Bella followed me in, placing a kiss on the middle of my back before she reached over and started the shower. She stepped in and called out to me.

"Aren't you joining me?" she asked.

"Hell yes," I mumbled.

Half an hour later, Bella and I had successfully showered, dried off, and gotten dressed. She had decided wear a blue cotton dress that fell to her knees and her favorite black flip-flops. She left her hair down so that it was flowing down her back. God, she looked incredible. I couldn't seem to take my eyes off of her.

"What are you looking at?" she asked, smoothing down the front of her dress. "Is there something on my dress?"

"No, you look beautiful," I said, smiling. "Incredible, actually."

"Thank you," she said, blushing. That was blush was going to be the death of me. "You look very handsome."

"Thanks," I snorted. I looked horrible compared to her. I was just wearing a pair of khaki shorts, a white t-shirt and my running shoes. "Are you ready to go grab some breakfast?"

"Yep," she smiled, picking up her purse. "For some reason, I am starving today. Do you know why that might be?"

"You have gotten quite a lot of exercise over the last couple of days," I smirked.

"That's true," laughed Bella, pulling the door open. "Amazing exercise at that."

Bella walked out of our small little cabin and I went to follow her. I stopped and went back over to my suitcase and pulled out a condom. I tucked it into my wallet and followed her out to her car. Better be prepared, right?

Bella insisted on driving today. Even though her driving still scared me a little, I didn't object. It was her car after all. She drove us into historic Colorado Springs and down to a small diner that was hidden away. We headed inside and sat down at a small table in the back. I reached across the table and pulled Bella's hand up to my lips, laying a soft kiss on her knuckles.

"Well, wasn't that just sweet," smiled our waitress as she came over to our table. She was young woman, maybe a few years older than me. She had long jet black hair and the prettiest russet colored skin I had ever seen. "What can I get you two young love birds to drink?"

"I'll take a cup of coffee," said Bella, smiling. The woman nodded her head and looked over at me.

"I'll take the same," I said.

"Ok, well, I'll give you a few minutes to look at the menu," she said before walking away.

"What are you going to get?" I asked, picking up the laminated menu.

"The Belgium waffle with strawberries and whipped cream," said Bella. I looked up at her. She wasn't even looking at the menu. "When I would come up here with my parents, on the morning we left we would always stop here for breakfast. Charlie would order two eggs, bacon, sausage, and three pancakes. Renee would get two pancakes and eat half of Charlie's order. I would always get the Belgium waffle with strawberries and whipped cream. Charlie would try to steal my whip cream but Renee would swat his hand away and tell him that I was a growing girl and needed it more than he did," explained Bella. She had a small smile playing on her lips.

"You smile a lot when you talk about your mom," I commented. Bella wiped a tear off her face as she looked at me.

"I miss her but when I am here, places like this that she loved so much, it's almost like I can feel her with me. Does that make any sense at all?" asked Bella.

"Perfect sense," I murmured, pressing the palm of her hand of my lips.

"You two are just so damn cute together," gushed our waitress, setting our cups of coffee in front of us. "It's sweet to see two people who love each other so much, be so open about how they feel."

"Oh, well, thank you," said Bella, blushing a soft pink.

"I didn't mean to embarrass you, honey," the woman fretted.

"Emily, table six is up," hollered the cook.

"Ok, Sam, keep your panties on," yelled Emily, looking back at the kitchen. She sighed and looked back at us. "Sorry about that. My husband is a little impatient sometimes."

"Don't worry about it," I said, smiling at her.

"Well, what can I get you guys?" asked Emily, pulling out her order form.

"I would like the Belgium waffle with strawberries and whip cream," said Bella with a huge smile on her face.

"That is my favorite," said Emily, winking at Bella.

"Mine too," laughed Bella. Emily laughed and looked over at me.

"I'll take two scrambled eggs, a side of bacon, and some wheat toast, please," I said, smiling at her.

"Emily," hollered Sam.

"I'm coming, Sam. I've only got one pair of legs and two arms," snapped Emily, shaking her head. "I'll have this right out."

"Ok, thanks," chuckled Bella. Emily walked away over to the small counter that separated the front from the back. She yelled for him to get a move on our order before picking up the two plates that were sitting there. Bella laughed as she looked over at me. "They seem fun."

"Yeah, they do," I snorted.

Bella and I enjoyed our breakfast very much. Between Emily and Sam yelling back and forth at each other and the delicious food, it had proven to be quite entertaining. The thing was that while Sam and Emily were bickering back and forth between each other, it was clear that they loved each other very much. He would wink at her when she was picking up an order or she would blow him a kiss. They had a unique love.

Once Bella and I paid our bill, we climbed back into her car. Bella decided that she wanted to go to the zoo. So we drove back up the mountain to the Cheyenne Mountain Zoo. Bella parked her car and we headed up to the entrance. She insisted on paying for us to get in since I had bought us breakfast. I knew better than to argue with her about this. So I stepped aside and let her buy our tickets.

"Ok, where to first?" I asked, taking her hand into mine. Bella smiled and looked at me.

"Let's go feed the giraffes," she squealed.

"Ok," I laughed.

Who was I to argue with her when she was this excited? Bella and I headed over to the enclosure where the giraffes lived. We each bought a handful of crackers and stepped up to the railing. The largest of the giraffes came right over to us. Bella held out one of the crackers for him. He snaked out his tongue and wrapped it around her entire hand before pulling the cracker into his mouth.

"Ew," laughed Bella. "That is so gross. He slobbered on me."

"I think he was getting fresh with you," I muttered, holding out one of my crackers. The giraffe ignored mine and looked over at Bella. "She's mine, big fella. You can't have her."

I swear the giraffe snorted. Bella stuck out another cracker for him. Once again, he wrapped his entire tongue around her hand before pulling the cracker into his mouth. Bella laughed again and pulled her hand back. It was nice to hear her laughing so much, even if it was because of a giraffe.

"He is kind of cute, isn't he?" she asked, smirking as she held another cracker at her.

"Oh, yeah," I scoffed. "He's adorable."

"Aw, don't be jealous," laughed Bella, slipping her arm around my waist and leaning up to my ear. "His tongue has nothing on yours."

"Did you hear that, Geoffrey?" I smirked. "I'm better than you are."

"Geoffrey?" asked Bella, cocking an eyebrow at me.

"Yeah, you know from Toys-R-Us," I explained.

"Oh, ok," giggled Bella.

"It's not weird that I know the name of the giraffe from there, Bella," I said, defending myself.

"Of course, it's not," said Bella, patting my arm.

"I don't think you believe me," I sighed, feeding the last of my crackers to a smaller, much nicer giraffe.

"I don't," laughed Bella.

"Ok, that's enough picking on the overgrown child," I muttered. "Where to now?"

"You lead, I'll follow," smiled Bella.

"Anywhere?" I asked.

"Anywhere," she said, softly.

I wrapped my arms around her as I lead her over to the Aquatics area. We spent at least ten minutes watching the hippos, penguins, beavers, Komodo dragons, and just about every type of snake you can think of. We didn't stay very long in the reptile house because Bella was scared of the snakes.

From there we headed up the mountain to the Asian Highlands. They had Amur tigers and leopards. Pallas' cats and the largest snow leopards I had ever seen. They were all beautiful. We went over to see the bears next. They had Asiatic black bears, spectacled bears, and grizzly bears. We went and saw the elephants next.

"The elephants were always Charlie's favorite part of the zoo," said Bella, leaning over the edge. "He said they were the toughest animals in here because they outweighed them all."

"What did Renee like the most?" I asked, slipping my arms around her waist.

"She loved the giraffes," murmured Bella, laying her head back on my shoulder. "Do you think she would be proud of who I am?"

"Yes, I do," I whispered, pressing my lips to the side of her neck. "Did you know that she was my kindergarten teacher?"

"No," said Bella.

"I remember one day that I had fallen on the playground because one of the boys in Emmett's class pushed me off the monkey bars," I explained. "I busted my lip open. She and I were waiting in the nurses office for my dad to come and get me. I was really upset, crying about everything. She held me in her lap and told me that I was going to be ok. I asked her how she could know that. She smiled and told me that my daddy would make sure I was ok. He did. Bella, your daddy is going to make sure you are ok," I said, quietly.

Bella turned in my arms and slipped hers around me. She laid her head on my chest and let her tears fall. We stood there next to the elephants for several minutes, just holding onto each other. A few people stopped and looked at the two of us but seemed to just go on and mind their own business.

"I pushed him away for so long, Edward," whispered Bella, laying her head on my chest. "Even though I pushed him away, he's still there for me."

"It's because he loves you," I murmured. "We all do."

"I know," she whispered. Bella took a deep breath and wiped her tears off her face. "Where to next?"

"You lead, I'll follow," I said, smiling.

"Forever?" she asked, biting her bottom lip.

"Forever," I promised.

Bella and I hung out at the zoo for another hour or so. After a stop at the gift shop where we picked up a stuffed elephant for Charlie, we headed back out to the car. We drove back to the cabin and spent the rest of the afternoon, window shopping through Manitou Springs. They had at least a hundred little novelty shops that sold everything from wind chimes to jewelry to Christmas ornaments.

Bella and I picked up Christmas ornaments for everyone with their names on them. Bella told me how when she was little that Charlie and Renee would always get her one and she wanted to share the tradition with the rest of our family. Hearing her referring to Emmett, Alice, Rose, Jasper, Carlisle, and Esme as a part of our family, made me happy.

By the time we climbed into the bed in our cabin that night, we were both exhausted. We had stopped and had dinner at a small Italian place a few blocks from our cabin. It was a quant little place with violins playing in the background and candles lighting the table. It was romantic, even if the food wasn't very good. We came back to the cabin and crawled into bed together. Bella laid her head on my chest and wrapped her arms around my waist, holding onto me as tightly as she could.

"Edward," she whispered.

"What?" I asked, running my fingers through her hair.

"I'll be ready soon," she whispered.

"Good to know," I murmured.

As Bella drifted off to sleep, I smiled to myself. One day soon, I would ask her to be my wife.


	31. Chapter 31

Thirty-one

BPOV

Beep…beep…beep…beep

"Ugh, fucking turn it off," I groaned, pulling my pillow over my head.

I felt the bed shift as Edward reached over and slammed his hand on to the alarm clock while muttering a series of four letters words under his breath. The bed shifted again and I felt Edward roll back over and press his body against mine. All of his body, including his amazingly hard cock that was pressing into my back. I moaned as I snaked a hand under my blanket and wrapped it around his rock hard shaft, which was currently covered by his tight ass boxers briefs.

"Baby," he murmured, shifting his hips toward me. "As much as I don't want you to stop, you need to get into the shower or you are going to be late for your first day of school."

"I have time," I whispered, rolling from my side to my back and looking up at him.

"No, you don't," he groaned, placing his hand on top of mine. "And if you don't stop, I'm going to be forced to tie you to the bed and keep you here all day, making sweet love to you."

"Promise?" I asked, smirking.

"Bella," he whined, falling back onto the bed. "You are such a little minx."

"Me?" I asked, moving so that I was straddling him. "I'm a minx?"

"Yes, you," laughed Edward, sliding his hand up to my hips. "You know you are."

"I do," I smiled. I leaned down and kissed him softly. "I'll make it up to you later. I promise."

"I'm holding you to that," he growled, playfully.

"I'm counting on it," I smirked.

Edward groaned as I climbed off his lap and the bed. I laughed to myself as I headed into the bathroom and started the shower. I stripped off my pajamas and climbed in under the hot water and sighed, letting the sizzling water wash over my tired, sore muscles.

We left the mountain late yesterday morning and made the long eight hour drive back to Clarendon. Part of me wanted to stay there in our own private bubble, just enjoying having Edward all to myself but the other part of me was ready to be home. I smiled to myself. My home was here with Edward. It had been a long time since I felt like I was truly home anywhere.

Even after I left Chicago, Clarendon wasn't my home but now it is.

"Bella, I'm putting your coffee on top of the dresser," hollered Edward, through the bathroom door. "Can I make you some eggs?"

"Yes, please," I yelled. "And thank you."

"You're welcome," he laughed.

I quickly finished my shower and dried off. I headed back out into our bedroom and smiled when I saw the cup of steaming hot coffee sitting on top of our oak dresser. That wonderful, sexy man really did love me. I took a sip, savoring the taste before I set the cup back on top of my dresser. I hurried as I got ready for my first day of school, pulling on a knee length black skirt, a white blouse, and a pair of black flats.

I was excited and scared to death. I was ready but at the same time, I felt unprepared and inadequate. I took a deep breath as I looked at myself one last time in the mirror. I had pulled my long hair up into a ponytail and added a light layer of make-up. Sighing, I looked away from the mirror and headed into the kitchen.

"Wow," said Edward, placing two plates of scrambled eggs on the table and looking up at me. "You look…amazing. Good thing you are working in the elementary school. All those high school boys would be making all kinds of excuses to visit the library."

"Whatever," I snorted, taking my seat.

"I'm serious, Bella," said Edward, sitting next to me. "You look beautiful."

"Thank you," I murmured, blushing. "I'm nervous as hell, though."

"I know," smiled Edward, bringing my hand up to his lips. "This is a huge day for you, love. You've worked so hard and you deserve this job. I'm proud of you."

"I needed to hear that," I whispered, leaning over and pressing my lips to his. "Thank you again for taking such great care of me."

"You're welcome, I guess," laughed Edward. "Now eat before you are late."

"Ok, ok," I giggled. "What time is your class?"

"Not until eleven," said Edward, taking a bit of his eggs. "Then I have office hours from one to four."

"I think I'm going to go see Alice after school," I said.

"Sounds good," smiled Edward.

Edward and I finished our breakfast but he refused to let me help with the clean up. He told me I had stalled long enough and it was time to go. I sighed and let him walk me to the front door. He pulled me into his arms and kissed me. My heart fluttered against my chest and I was sure he could feel it. I took a deep breath as I pulled my lips from his. The man had no clue what he really did to me.

I grabbed my purse and keys before heading out to my car. Edward watched from the doorway as I climbed into my car, started it up, and headed away from the home we shared. I drove through town and parked my car in the facility parking lot. Taking another deep breath, I climbed out of my car and headed into the school.

I made my way down the hallway to my library. The moment I walked into the room, I felt my body relax. I was surrounded by books. This was my world. My little sanctuary in the world that I was in complete control of. It felt amazing.

"Are you just going to stand there smiling like a little girl on Christmas morning?" asked Kate. I laughed as I looked over my shoulder at her.

"I might," I said, smiling. I went behind my desk and put my purse up while Kate came over and leaned against the counter, smirking at me. "Can I help you with something, Kate?"

"No," giggled Kate. "I'm just enjoying watching you smile. You must be thinking about Edward."

"Maybe," I mumbled, feeling my face turn bright red, which just caused Kate to laugh harder. "Leave me alone!"

"Ok, ok," she said, smiling. "I had better get down to my class before all the parents get all irate with me. I'll see you later, ok?"

"Ok," I smiled. Kate headed down to her classroom and I sat down on my chair and took one more deep breath. _Here's to my first day, _I thought.

As the morning wore on, I found myself relaxing more and more. One by one the teachers would bring their classes in and introduce them to me. I explained how everything would work, even though I knew I would have to remind them all at least a dozen more times. Each time, I explained the rules of the library, I felt my confidence building.

"How's it going?"

I turned and saw Garrett standing in the doorway to my library. I was sitting on the floor with my legs tucked behind me and a pile of books around me as I worked on organizing a few of the shelves.

"It's going good," I said, looking back at my shelves. "I'm just trying to organize these books better. I kept getting distracted though."

"By people coming in?" he asked, coming over and squatting down next to my pile.

"No, by the books," I laughed. "I keep getting lost in reading character descriptions and summaries."

"Ah," smiled Garrett, picking up a copy of 'Where the Wild Things Are.' "This was my favorite book when I was kid."

"Really?" I asked. "I always thought it was sad. I mean the boy was so lost and found refuge in a world of make-believe."

"Lost?" asked Garrett, settling down on the floor. "He ran away after he got into trouble and didn't want to obey the rules."

"True," I agreed, nodding my head. "But maybe he felt so lost inside of himself that he didn't know what to do. His sister was too busy with her friends to take five minutes to spend with him. His mother was wrapped up in her own love life. Who was taking care of Max?"

"Hmm," snorted Garrett, flipping through the book. "I never thought about it like that. You make a good point but you forgot about one thing."

"What's that?" I asked, looking over at him.

"In the end Max does came home," said Garrett.

"That he does," I murmured. "But coming home is not always as easy as it is in a child's book, Garrett."

"I know it's not," he said, placing the book back on the pile before he stood up. "Let me know if you need anything, Bella."

"I will," I said, looking up at him.

Garrett left and I went back to putting the books on the shelves. Just before the third grade class was schedule to the cafeteria for lunch, I closed up my library and headed down to watch over them while they ate. They came in five minutes later with Lauren leading them. She smiled as she directed the kids which two rows of tables to sit at.

"How's your first day going?" asked Lauren as a little girl with blond hair tried to skip a seat.. "Macy, take the next seat please."

"It's been good," I said, smiling. "How's yours?"

"Long," laughed Lauren. "It'll get easier. It's just hard to get used to new kids, new schedules. We'll have to feel each other out and see what best works for us as a class."

"You sound like my mom did when she was teaching," I murmured.

"Where do you think I got that from?" asked Lauren. "She was the one who made me want to become a teacher, Bella."

"She did?" I asked, blinking back the tears that filled my eyes.

"Yes," smiled Lauren. "I only hope that I have the same effect on my kids that she had on hers."

"Me too," I whispered.

Lauren left a few minutes later to eat her own lunch and get a few minutes of peaceful silence. The kids mostly talked amongst each other. There were a couple of kids who were going to need to learn to keep their hands, and plastic forks, to themselves but as Lauren said, we'd figure it out. If we didn't, we'd be having a long school year.

After I walked the kids out onto the playground and left them with the recess monitors, I headed back into my library and went back to work. By the end of the day, my feet were killing me but I had managed to get a lot of work done. I locked up my library and headed back out to my car. I drove through town and parked outside of Alice's small dress shop. I headed inside and found her sitting at the counter, filling out a mountain of paperwork.

"Hey, Ali," I said, closing the door behind me. She looked up and smiled but there was something off about it.

"Hey, Bella," she said, adverting her eyes from mine. "How was your first day at school?"

"It was good," I said, quietly. "How's the shop doing?"

"Great," she said, standing up. "I'm placing my order for my fall line. That's always fun."

"Got a lot of cute stuff coming?" I asked, leaning on the counter. "You know, I'm going to need some new fall clothes."

"I'm ordering some cute stuff," she said, looking up at me. "I'll let you know when they come in."

"Alice, are you mad at me?" I whispered. I could feel the tears building up in my eyes.

"Why would I be mad at you?" she asked, shortly. "Just because you don't need me anymore."

"Alice, I do need you," I said, reaching for her. She pulled her hand away. "Alice."

"You don't need me," she whispered, letting a tear fall down her face as she looked up at me.

"How can you think that?" I asked.

"Because you have her," cried Alice.

"Who?" I asked.

"Rosalie," she snapped. "You have Rosalie and don't need me now."

"Alice, I do need you," I gasped. "You're my best friend, my sister."

"You don't talk to me like you do her," muttered Alice. "Do you just not trust me, Bella?"

"Of course, I trust you, Alice," I said. "Rose just understands-"

"I don't have to understand, Bella," snapped Alice, slamming her tiny hand on the counter. I was so surprised that I flinched back. "I don't have to have been through the same shit that the two of you have been through to be there for you. I've tried. Lord knows, I've tried. I don't know what to do anymore. So I give up."

"Alice," I cried.

"I've tried not to push you, Bella," sobbed Alice. "I didn't want to be like him. I didn't want to make you feel like I was controlling you but you don't need me. You don't want me. It hurts because I've been without my best friend for six years and I missed you so much, Bella."

"Alice, I missed you, too," I cried. "I'm sorry. I'll be a better friend. Just don't give up on me. I'll let you take me shopping or to get our nails done. I'll do whatever you want."

"I just want to you to talk to me, Bella," said Alice, shaking her head. "You used to tell me everything but you don't now. You have Edward and Rose and you don't need me. I'm just your throw away friend."

"That is not true," I said, grabbing her hand. She tried to pull it away from me but I held on it. "Alice, you are not my throw away friend. I just… I don't like that you know how weak I was."

"You were not weak, Bella," cried Alice, looking up at me. "You were strong enough to get the fuck out of this town. I wasn't. That's ok, because I don't hate it but I wish I had been strong enough to save you."

"Alice," I whispered, letting my tears fall freely. "Please don't give up on me. I need my sister."

"I need you, too, Bella," whispered Alice. "I'm sorry. I'm just so tired. I haven't been sleeping much and…"

"No, I didn't realize that I was pulling away from you so much," I murmured, hugging her. "I don't like it when we fight, Alice."

"Me either, Bella," cried Alice, wrapping her arms around me. "Let's never fight again."

"Deal," I whispered. "I love you, Alice."

"I love you, too, Bella," she whispered. She pulled back and wiped the tears off her face. "I'm going to have such a headache from crying."

"Me too," I laughed, wiping my own tears off my face. "Are we okay now?"

"Yeah, we're okay now," she said, quietly. "So how was your weekend away with my brother?"

"It was…pretty incredible," I said, blushing. Alice's eyes widen and her mouth fell open.

"Did you two have sex?" she asked, lowering her voice. I bit my lip as I nodded my head. "Oh my god, Bella. That was such a huge step!"

"He said he wants to marry me, Alice," I said, smiling at her. She gasped so loudly that I was sure that she had sucked all the oxygen out of the air.

"You and Edward are getting married?" she asked.

"No, he didn't propose," I said. "He said when I was ready that he was going to propose because he wants the world to know that I said yes to him."

"Oh, Bella," whispered Alice, placing her hands over her mouth. "That's so romantic."

"I know," I smiled. "I love him, Alice. I think I've always loved him."

"Of course you have," she laughed before turning serious. She reached over and grabbed my hand. "He's always love you, too, Bella. I'm so happy for the both of you."

"Thanks," I whispered, though my tears. "Great, I'm crying again."

"Me too," giggled Alice, wiping her tears away. "Tears of happiness, though."

"Definitely," I smiled.

I stayed down at Alice's shop for another hour or so. She showed me everything that she was ordering for her fall collection. She had fantastic taste. I hugged her and promised to call her the next day before I headed back out to my car. I didn't realize that I had been pushing Alice away but I had. I would have to make sure she always knew just how much she means to me.


	32. Chapter 32

Thirty-two

Over the next few weeks, Edward and I fell into a pretty constant routine. We worked, came home and had dinner, watched television, and went to bed. Well, really he would watch television while I worked on my novel but we were in the living room together, cuddling with my laptop in my lap and the remote to the television in his hand.

To most people, it would seem boring, and maybe it was, but for me, it was the most normal I had felt in so long. I was loving every minute of it. We alternated who cooked dinner, did the dishes, cleaned the house. Edward usually whine a lot about having to clean the house but he still did it. I took care of the laundry because while I love Edward, the man doesn't understand why it is important to separate whites from darks. It was just better for me to handle that part. In exchange, Edward took out the trash. It seemed fair to me. We were equal partners in our relationship.

Alice and I had hung out a couple more times. We went to Amarillo and watched movies, went shopping, got our nails done. Maybe it wasn't my first choice of what to do but Alice was my best friend and I would do just about anything to make sure she never felt like I didn't need her again. Once she even called Rose and Kate and asked them to come with us. I was grateful that she realized how much Rose needed us, all of us.

Everything was great until two days ago when I started running a fever. Edward panicked, convincing himself that I was dying of the Spanish influenza or something, and dragged me down to Carlisle's office. Carlisle examined me and found that both of my ears were infected and my throat was raw.

"Bella, I've got to go," said Edward, coming back into our room. I was still laying in bed with the covers pulled up under my chin. He came over and sat down on the edge of my bed. "Are you sure you are going to be okay here alone?"

"I'll be fine," I said, smiling weakly. "I'm just going to sleep most of the day, anyway."

"Ok, well, I'll have my cell on me if you need me," said Edward, cupping my face. "God, you're still burning up. I should stay."

"Edward, you have to go teach," I frowned. "I just took some Tylenol and the antibiotics that Carlisle prescribed to me. I have my juice, a book, and my laptop. Please don't worry about me."

"I can't help it," he said, matching my frown. I brought my hand up to his face. "Ok, I'll be home in a few hours."

"I love you," I whispered.

"I love you, too," he murmured, kissing my forehead. "Rest."

"Ok, ok," I grumbled.

Edward sighed as he stood up and left our room. A couple of minutes later, I heard him shut the door as he left. I curled up in the bed, pulling his pillow up to my chest, and drifted back into a peaceful, relaxing sleep.

I'm not sure how long I was sleeping when I felt a cold hand being placed on my forehead. I snapped my eyes open, startled by the unexpected coldness, and found Esme sitting next to me.

"Esme?" I asked, attempting to sit up but feeling really weak. "What are you doing here?"

"Edward told me you were still running a fever so I came by to take care of you," she explained. "Now, sip on some water. I don't want you to get dehydrated."

"I'm trying to," I grumbled, sipping the water out of the straw she stuck into my mouth. "Shouldn't you be working?"

"I'm sick today, too," she said, smiling. I narrowed my eyes at her.

"You don't look sick," I pointed out. Esme fake coughed a couple times. "Esme."

"Don't be like this, sweetheart," she sighed. "I just want to take care of you."

"Ok, ok," I sighed, shaking my head. "Who am I to deny you your motherly ways."

"Well, are you hungry?" she asked. "I brought you some of my homemade chicken noodle soup."

"I'm a little hungry," I said.

"Ok, well, I'm just going to heat it up and bring it to you," said Esme, standing up. She headed over to the door but stopped and turned around. "Oh, I almost forgot. Charlie said this letter came for you."

"Who's it from?" I asked, sitting up a little more.

"He didn't know," she said, handing it to me. "I'll be right back."

"Ok," I whispered, ripping open the back of the envelope. I pulled out the letter and gasped. It was from David Newton.

**Bella,**

**I know I said I would never bother you again, and I'm truly sorry that I am not keeping my word to you, but there are a few things I needed you to know. First, I'm terribly sorry that Karen came after you and Charlie like she did. When I heard that she had burned down your house, well, I was shocked and pissed the hell off. I wish I could have protected the two of you from her but I guess that was one more way that I was a coward. Again, I'm sorry.**

**Second, I would like to apologize for doing what I am fixing to do. I know I told you that I was going to get a new start but…I'm not as strong as you are, I guess. I hope that you find your happiness and I hope that you find true love again because you deserve it all, Bella. You are so much better than I am. Please forgive me for being weak.**

**When I was a young man, I had big dreams. I'm too old to follow them now and, honestly, I'm tired. Everyday I wake up and think to myself, what am I going to do and I just don't have an answer. I hope you that you have that answer for yourself.**

**Again, I'm sorry I wasn't a stronger man, Bella.**

**David**

"Bella, sweetheart, what's wrong?" asked Esme. I looked up as she came rushing into the room. It was then that I realized I had been sobbing. "Talk to me."

"It's from David Newton," I cried, shoving the letter into her hands. Esme held me tight into her chest while she read the letter he had sent to me.

"Oh, my word," she whispered, pressing her lips to the top of my head. "That poor man."

"He was all alone," I cried.

"I know," murmured Esme.

Esme dropped the letter onto the floor and wrapped both her arms around me. She laid me back down on the bed and held me as I continued to cry until I cried myself to sleep.

I was shaken awake sometime later when I heard people talking in the living room. My head hurt and I wasn't sure if it was from the fever that ravaged my body or all the crying I had done. Perhaps it was both. I crawled out of bed, ignoring the ache that filled my body, and stumbled over to the door that was cracked halfway open.

"If I had known it was from him, Edward, I wouldn't have given to her while she was sick," sighed Esme.

"I know, Mom, but she was already feeling crappy enough and now…" Edward trailed off. I pushed the door open the rest of the way. He and Esme looked over at me and smiled. "Baby, you should be in bed."

"Don't blame Esme for giving me his letter," I muttered. My throat was dry and scratchy. "She didn't know."

"I don't blame her, Bella," said Edward, crossing the room and wrapping his arms around me. He pressed his lips to my forehead. "You are still running a fever."

"I'm going to head home," said Esme. She came over and wrapped her arms around the two of us. "The soup is in the fridge, Edward. Make sure she eats some."

"I will, Mom," murmured Edward.

"Esme, thank you," I whispered, laying my head on Edward's chest. "I love you."

"I love you, too," she smiled, kissing my cheek. "If you need me, just call."

"We will," said Edward.

After Esme left, Edward lifted me into his arms and carried me back into our bedroom. He laid me down on the bed and climbed on next to me. I rolled over so that I could lay my head on his chest. Edward chuckled and wrapped his arms around me.

"How was class?" I asked.

"Boring as hell," he murmured. "I was worried about you the whole time."

"Edward," I sighed, looking up at him. "I'm fine."

"You are not fine," he argued. "You have been running a fever for two days."

"Yes, and your father examined me and said it was just an ear infection. I'm fine," I said, smiling at him.

"Are you hungry?" he asked, changing the subject.

"A little," I admitted.

"Ok, I'm going to go heat you up some of the soup Esme left," said Edward, climbing out of the bed. "Don't go anywhere."

"Where would I go?" I asked. "I'm sick, remember?"

"Smartass," he muttered, walking out of the room.

I laughed softly as I pushed myself up in the bed so that I was sitting up. I knew he had been worried about me over the last couple days but I was fine. Or I would be fine, at least. Edward came back in a few minutes later, holding a bowl of hot soup in his hands. He settled down on the side of bed next to me. I reached for the bowl but he pulled it back.

"Isn't it going to be kind of hard for me to eat if you don't give it to me?" I asked.

"Not when I'm going to feed you," he smirked, holding up a soup full of the creamy broth. "Open wide."

"Edward, I can feed myself," I giggled.

"I know you can but I really want to feed you," he said, winking at me. "It's kind of sexy."

"You are really kind of strange, my love," I said, snorting. "But I guess I can let you feed me. Just this once, though."

Edward's smile grew as he carefully brought the spoon to my mouth. I kept my eyes locked on his as I wrapped my lips around the spoon and sucked the soup in. Edward's eyes darkened and he started breathing heavily. I licked my lips as he put the spoon back into the bowl. He offered me another spoonful and I, once again, wrapped my lips around the spoon and took the soup he was offering me.

Over and over again we played our little game. Edward's eyes grew darker and his breathing was coming out in short pants. I was burning, whether from the fever that ravaged me or the sheer lust that I knew was rolling off of me, I wasn't sure. All I knew was that I wanted him and I wanted him now.

Edward must have been thinking the same thing because once he had fed me the last spoonful of soup, he practically threw the bowl onto the floor and pushed me back onto the bed as his lips crashed down onto mine. I moaned a throaty, porn star quality moan as I gripped his hair in my fingers and thrust my tongue into his mouth. In what could only be defined as a frenzy, Edward and I tore each other's clothes off. He pushed my legs apart and dove into me in one quick thrust.

"Oh, fuck, Edward," I growled, wrapping my legs around his waist as he started thrusting into me like a mad man. He was raw and rough and I was so fucking turned on. "Don't fucking stop."

"Never going to stop," he grunted, pumping into me harder and faster. "Fuck, you're so fucking tight, baby."

I had never had Edward like this. He wasn't making love to me. He was fucking me hard and fast. His hand slid down to my thigh and he pulled my leg further up on his hip, deepening his penetration. I could already feel my orgasm rushing through my body like a freight train. Edward slammed his hips into me once more before releasing deep inside of me, pulling me over the edge with him.

Edward was gasping as he rolled off of me and onto the bed next to me. He looked over at me and smiled.

"Wow," was all he said.

"Wow," I smiled, agreeing with him. "I need a shower. Will you help?"

"Fuck yes," he muttered.

I laughed as Edward crawled off the bed. He lifted my sticky body in his arms and carried me into the bathroom. We showered, washing off all the evidence of our afternoon escapade, and dried off. Edward kept his arm around my still feverish body as we headed back into our bedroom. I pulled on one of his t-shirts and a pair of sweatpants before I climbed back onto the bed. Edward cleaned up the bowl off the floor and climbed onto the bed with me. I laid my head on his chest and sighed as I drifted off to sleep. Mind blowing sex is certainly one way to fight a fever.


	33. Chapter 33

Thirty-three

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. _Shit, shit, shit_, I thought as I flipped back through the calendar and started counting days again. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. I threw the calendar across my library and glared at it as it fell to the floor, mocking me.

"Ms. Swan," said a sweet little voice. I looked down to see a little girl named Savannah, with bright red hair, standing in front of my desk, nervously. She had unshed tears in her eyes and my heart broke. "I tore your book. It was an accident. I'm sorry."

"It's ok, sweetie," I said, moving around the desk with my roll of tape. "I bet we can fix it."

"I didn't mean to do it but I was turning the page and it just ripped," she said, sniffing as we moved to one of the small tables.

"It's ok, Savannah," I said, taping the page back together. "You're not in trouble."

"Thank you, Ms. Swan," she said, smiling.

She took the book and headed back to her first grade classroom. I stood up and looked over where my calendar still laid on the floor. Moving across the room, I picked up the calendar and took it back to my desk. I sat back down and started counting days again. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. My period was now officially ten days late.

As I locked up my library and headed out to my car, I thought about the fact that I was more than likely pregnant. When I was sick, and Edward turned into 'Mr. Horny and can't wait five seconds to wrap it up before sexing me up,' we had neglected to use a condom. Even though I had just started on my birth control, I hadn't been on them long enough to protect myself. Plus with the antibiotics I was taking, it's no wonder I am now ten days late.

I parked my car in the driveway and sat there for a few minutes. I wasn't sure what to tell Edward. We were just getting started and now… I shook my head as I climbed out of my car. I wouldn't say anything to him until I knew for sure. I wouldn't even think about it.

"Hey, love," he smiled as I walked into the house.

"Hey," I said, putting my purse and keys down. I kicked off my shoes and went over and joined him on the couch. "How was class?"

"Incredibly boring," he sighed. "I nearly put myself to sleep. How was the library?"

"Great," I smiled, cuddling up next to him. "There was a little girl nearly in tears over ripping one of my books. I felt so bad for her."

"Did you make her feel better?" asked Edward.

"Of course, I did," I laughed, sitting up. "What's for dinner? It's your turn to cook."

"Hmm," he murmured, thinking. "How about fish?"

"Again?" I asked, laughing. "How much more fish do we have in the freezer, anyway?"

"A few," he said, smiling at me. "We can have something else if you want."

"Fish is fine," I sighed. I leaned down and kissed him. "I'm going to go take a shower while you cook."

"Bella," whined Edward as I climbed off his lap. "You can't tell me that you are going to be naked and not let me shower with you."

"Sorry, lover, but I'm starving," I laughed, pulling off my shirt and throwing it at him. "So chop chop."

Edward muttered something along the lines of me being a tease as I walked into our bedroom. I walked into our bathroom and turned on the water. I stripped off my clothes and stepped in under the water. I let my hand drift down to my abdomen. Would Edward still want me if I was pregnant right now? Would he think I was trapping him?

By the next morning, I was a nervous wreck. I had spent nearly the entire night, laying wide awake next to Edward while he slept, and thinking about the possibility of having his baby. I knew that regardless if he was happy or not about it, I was keeping the baby. I just couldn't do that to an innocent child, especially our child.

I snuck out of bed before Edward woke. Quietly dressing, I left him a note and headed out to my car. I had to go get a test and I knew I couldn't get one here at the drugstore. Rumors would be flying all over town before I drove the three blocks back home. So instead, I climbed into my car and drove to Amarillo.

It took me just under an hour to make the drive. I pulled my car up in a parking space at Walmart and headed inside, making a beeline for the pharmacy. I felt like everyone was staring at me as I stood there, trying to decide which test to pick. There were at least six different brands sitting on the shelf. How was I suppose to know which brand to get?

"What the fuck kind of test am I supposed to get?" I muttered to myself. I heard a loud huff and looked over to see a woman pulling her son, who was about three, away from me. "Yeah, nobody asked you to stand by me anyway, lady!"

I turned back to the tests and stared at them for a few more minutes before just grabbing one each of the three most expensive tests. I mean, more money meant the better quality of the result, right? Sighing, I clutched the tests to my chest and walked away. I spent the next hour walking around Walmart, trying to build the courage to take the tests in my hands.

I was standing in the middle of the men's clothes when my cell phone rang. I dug it out of my purse and answered it without looking at the caller ID.

"Hello?"

"Bella, where the hell are you?" asked Edward.

"Shit," I muttered, dropping the pregnancy tests on the floor. "Goddamn it!"

"Um, Bella, are you ok?" asked Edward.

"Yeah," I grumbled, squatting down and picking up the blasted tests.

"Ok, well, where are you?" he asked.

"Huh?" I asked.

"Where are you?" he asked, speaking slowly.

"You don't have to talk to me like I am stupid," I muttered, harshly.

"I wasn't," he sighed. "But you haven't answered my question."

"What question?" I asked, standing back up.

"Where are you?" he asked, laughing.

"Oh, I'm at Walmart," I said, shrugging my shoulders. Of course, then I realized that he couldn't actually see me. "Did you need something?"

"Why are you at Walmart?" he asked, ignoring my question.

"I, um, I…." I trailed off as I looked around. "I needed to get you socks."

"Socks?" he snorted.

"Yes, yours were getting really thin and it's going to be cold soon and I don't want you to get sick so I came to buy you…socks," I said, grabbing a package of white crew socks.

"Ok," he laughed. "Well, when are you going to be home? We were supposed to go to my parents for dinner tonight, remember? Everyone was going to be there."

"Oh, shit, I forgot," I muttered.

"Such language," huffed a woman. I turned and saw the same woman from the pharmacy.

"Stop stalking me, lady, before I have to kick your ass!" I snapped. She turned and scurried away. "That's what I thought. All talk and no action!"

"Bella," laughed Edward. "Stop threatening people at Walmart."

"I'm not," I sighed. "She's following me around. I think she's a spy."

"A spy?" snorted Edward. "Ok, well, I'll leave you to your spy games. When are you going to be home?"

"Oh, in an hour or so," I said. "I just have to pay for your…socks and get gas in my car. Then I will be on my way."

"Well, be careful," he said, still laughing at me. "I love you."

"I love you, too, Edward," I said, softly. "So much."

"Are you ok?" he asked. "You're acting funny."

"I'm fine," I whispered, feeling my eyes fill up with tears. "Just great."

"Ok," he said, softly. "I'll see you when you get home."

"Ok," I cried, closing my cell phone.

I dropped my phone back into my purse and clutched the socks and the three pregnancy tests to my chest. I hurried over and got into line. The woman in front of me was being exceptionally slow and really started to piss me off. I moved out of that line just to get into one that was closing after they helped the person in front of me. I grumbled under my breath, calling them every four letter word I could think of, and went in search for a new lane.

It pissed me off that there were twenty-three check out lanes at Walmart and only four of them were open. I mean, it's Saturday morning, for fuck sake! People like to come here on Saturday mornings. I finally managed to pay for my purchases, ignoring the smirk from the eighteen year old boy working the register, and headed back out to my car. I placed my Walmart bag in the front seat of the car and headed down to Petro, our favorite gas station in Amarillo, to get gas.

That damn bag called to me, mocked me, as I drove. It was sitting there in the seat, begging me to take those tests and find out if I was in fact having Edward's baby or if I was just really, really, really late. I pulled my car up to the pump and climbed out only to realize that the gas cap was on the other side of the car.

"Goddamn, son of a bitch," I muttered, climbing back into the car.

I pulled my car around to the other side and climbed back out, still muttering four letter words under my breath. I pumped my gas, tapping my foot on the ground and tried to ignore the bag that was still mocking me from inside my car. Once the nozzle had clicked, I replaced it and tore my credit card receipt off and pulled my car door open. The bag still sat there mocking me.

"FINE!" I yelled, reaching in and grabbing the bag.

I threw Edward's socks into the backseat and locked my car before heading inside, clutching the bag to my chest. I stalked into the bathroom and locked the door behind me. I set the bag on the shelf above the sink and looked at it for several minutes. I took a deep breath and pulled out the boxes, ripped them open, and pulled out the tests. Two of them had sticks I could pee on while the third one had a little mini cup. _How thoughtful of them_, I thought, sarcastically.

I set all three tests on the shelf and the cup on the top of the toilet paper holder. I pulled my jeans and panties down, sat on the toilet, and proceeded to pee in the cup. Being extremely careful, I placed the full cup on the shelf and wiped before stood up, pulled my clothes back up, and flushed. I took my time while washing my hands, making sure they were extra clean and dry.

Not able to put it off any longer, I picked up the first of the three sticks, took the cap off, and dipped it into the cup of pee. Repeating the process with the other two sticks, I laid them down on the paper towel, dumped the cup, and waited. And waited and waited and waited. It felt like forever for the three minutes to go by. Finally, it was time to check the results.

"Here goes nothing," I whispered.

I moved over and picked up the first stick. Plus sign. I set that one down and picked up the second stick. Two lines. With shaking hands, I put that one back down and picked up the next test. Big, fat, PREGNANT!

"Oh, wow," I muttered.

I tossed all three tests into the bag and headed back out to my car. I climbed in, pulled my seatbelt on, started the car, and just sat there. It wasn't until I felt the wetness drip off my chin that I realized I had tears pouring down my face. I moved my hands to my belly and cried even harder. I was pregnant. Edward and I were going to have a baby.

It took several minutes for me to calm down enough to actually drive. While I had expected to be upset, or something, I found myself actually smiling. I was happy to be pregnant and I knew that I had to tell Edward as soon as I got back to the house. I just hoped that he would be as happy as I was.

An hour later, I pulled my car up into the drive way of our little house. I climbed out of the car and grabbed my bag from Walmart. I headed into the house with a smile on my face. Edward was laying on the couch when I came in. He looked up at me and smiled.

"Hey, beautiful," he said, sitting up. "How was Walmart?"

"Fun," I said, moving over and sitting down next to him.

"Why didn't you wake me up?" he asked. "I would have gone with you. I mean, I was the one needing socks, right?"

"Oh, yeah," I muttered.

"Where are my socks?" he asked, looking down at the blue bag in my hand.

"Oh, I left them in the car," I said, waving my hand in the air. "Listen-"

"What's in the bag then?" he asked, looking from the bag up to me.

"Look for yourself," I whispered, shoving the bag into his hands.

"Ok," he snorted. He opened the back and looked inside. "Um, Bella?"

"Yeah," I whispered as he looked up at me.

"Why are there three positive pregnancy tests in here?" he asked.

"Um," I said, taking a deep breath. "Because I'm pregnant."


	34. Chapter 34

Thirty-four

EPOV

I tossed the phone onto the coffee table and flopped down on the couch. I wasn't sure what the hell was going on with Bella but something was up. She wasn't the kind of woman who would just leave me a note and drive an hour just to buy me a package of socks when we had a perfectly good dollar store here in town. I just couldn't figure out what was going on through her beautiful mind. I laid down on the couch and flipped on the television. Bella would tell me eventually what was going on. I could trust her.

A little over an hour later, I heard Bella pull her car up into the driveway. Relief filled me. I stayed so that I was laying on the couch. I didn't want to seem too eager to see her, even if I had missed her like crazy while she was gone. A minute later, Bella came into the house, looking extremely beautiful. I mean, she was always beautiful but there was something different about her.

"Hey, beautiful," I said, sitting up "How was Walmart?"

"Fun," said Bella, moving over and sitting down next to me. .

"Why didn't you wake me up?" I asked "I would have gone with you. I mean, I was the one needing socks, right?"

"Oh, yeah," Bella muttered, looking down at her hands.

"Where are my socks?" I asked, looking down at the blue bag in her hands. It looked like it was empty.

"Oh, I left them in the car." Bella waved her hand in the air, like it was no big deal. "Listen-"

"What's in the bag then?" I asked, looking from the bag up to her. She seemed very nervous.

"Look for yourself," she whispered, shoving the bag into my hands.

"Ok," I snorted.

I opened the back and looked inside. I wasn't sure if I was seeing what I thought I was seeing. I mean, maybe I was delirious but it looked like there were three pregnancy tests inside. Not only that but, and I may be wrong, but they looked like they were positive. Did that mean that she was pregnant? Were we going to have a baby?

"Um, Bella?" I asked.

"Yeah," she whispered. I looked up at her. I could feel the tears building in my eyes.

"Why are there three positive pregnancy tests in here?" I asked.

"Um," she said, taking a deep breath. "Because I'm pregnant."

I dropped the bag, letting it fall to the floor as I stood up. I walked over to the window as I felt my tears pouring down my face. I was going to be a dad. Bella and I were going to have a baby together. I turned and looked at her. She was sitting on the couch, watching me with a frown on her face. I went over to her and grabbed her hands, pulling her to her feet. I brought my hands up to her face, cupping her gently as I leaned my forehead down onto hers.

"We're having a baby," I whispered. Bella simply nodded her head. "Wow."

"Wow as in good or wow as in get the hell out of my house?" she asked. Her lip was trembling as she fought to stop herself from crying.

"Wow as in I've never been this happy in my whole fucking life and I love you more now than I did five minutes ago," I murmured, smiling at her. Bella let her tears fall as she wrapped her arms around me and laid her head on my chest.

"I was so nervous, Edward," she cried, holding onto me.

"Why were you nervous?" I asked.

"I didn't…we didn't plan on having a baby, Edward," she said, quietly. "I thought you might think that I was trying to trap you or… I don't know."

"Bella," I murmured. "I didn't plan on falling in love with you but I did. We may not have planned on having a baby right now but we are. I couldn't be happier that you and I having this little boy or girl together."

"Really?" she asked, looking up at me and smiling.

"Yes, really," I said, smiling in return. I stroked her check with my thumb. "I love you, Bella."

"I love you, too," she whispered.

I leaned down and captured her lips with mine. Bella moaned and tightened her arms around me, letting her hand roam over my back. I slipped my tongue into her mouth, deepening the kiss. Bella moaned again and I could feel my cock hardening. Her little noises were driving me crazy. I reached down and grabbed her ass in my hands, lifting her up. Bella automatically wrapped her legs around my waist.

I turned and carried her into our bedroom and laid her on the bed. I pulled my lips from hers and smiled as I started removing her clothes, one piece at a time until she was laying before me completely naked. I ran my hands down her body, letting my hands run over her breasts, until I reached her abdomen. I leaned down and placed a gently kiss right in the middle.

"Hello, baby, I'm your daddy," I whispered, peppering her belly with kisses. Bella started giggling and I looked up at her. "What's so funny?"

"He or she can't actually hear you yet," she smiled. "Plus, your whiskers are tickling me."

"Really?" I asked, smirking as I looked down at her wet pussy. "I wonder if it would tickle you here."

"Edward," moaned Bella as I cupped her. "Please!"

I didn't say anything as I moved down and settled myself between her legs. I pulled Bella's legs up onto my shoulders, leaving her wide open for me. Not wanting to waste anymore time, I leaned down and licked her from top to bottom, savoring her delicious taste. Bella moaned and bucked her hips up to me.

"More," she begged. "Please, move."

I couldn't handle hearing her beg anymore so I leaned down and buried my face into her. Bella cried out as I thrust my tongue into her as deep as I could. Fuck, she tasted fantastic. How did I ever get so lucky as to get to taste her like this. Over and over, I thrust my tongue into her, memorizing every inch of her. Every drop of her sweet essence was like tasting the best wine.

"Oh, Edward," she cried, arching her back as she came.

I lapped up every drop that she gave me before I sat up in my knees and stripping off my clothes, tossing them around the room carelessly. I shoved my pants down, kicking them off. My cock was so hard that I could cut glass and it aching, begging to be buried deep in her. I lined myself up to her opening and pushed into Bella quickly.

"Yes," I hissed, feeling her walls encasing me.

"Fuck, Edward," muttered Bella, arching her back again. "You're so fucking big."

"Bella," I moaned, pulling back out just to fill her once again. "So fucking tight."

Bella was wriggling around underneath me, pulling me into her warm heaven deeper than I had ever been. I leaned forward as I started thrusting in and out of her, hard and fast. I knew I wasn't going to last very long. I had already been in the edge when I entered her and I needed her to cum for me first. I needed it. I snaked my hand between us and started rubbing on her clit.

"Oh, fuck, Edward," cried Bella, grabbing onto my arms and pulling my body down onto hers. Her walls clenched down, milking me as I came deep inside of her. "YES!"

"BELLA," I grunted, burying my head in her neck. As I rode out my orgasm, I pressed my lips to the side of her neck and said, "I fucking love you."

"I fucking love you, too," she laughed.

Bella and I spent the rest of the afternoon in bed, talking about everything from why she was afraid to tell me to whether our baby was a boy or girl. She told me that she wanted to wait a little while longer before we told anyone else. When I asked her why, she explained that after losing her baby back at the beginning of the summer that she just wanted to wait until she was further along. I agreed, even though I was dying to tell everyone that I was going to be a dad. God, I loved that I was going to be a dad.

Eventually, however, we had to get out of bed and take a shower. We were going to my parents for dinner and I knew that we couldn't get out of it. We climbed into the shower together and washed each other's bodies, taking our time. Who cared if we were a few minutes late. Once we were done, we dried each other off and got dressed.

Bella pulled on a pair of jeans and an ivory sweater. She had a huge smile on her face. I loved seeing it plastered there. I pulled on a pair of jeans and a white dress shirt. Once Bella was ready, we grabbed our keys and headed over to my parents house. I parked my car out front and cut the engine. Bella reached for the door handle but I grabbed her hand. She looked over at me.

"What?" she asked.

"Nothing," I smiled. "Just wanted to keep you to myself for a few more minutes."

"Ok," she said, matching my smile. She sat back, placing her free hand in her lap. "It's quiet in here."

As I watched Bella sitting there with the moonlight shining in on her, I knew that I wanted her to be my wife as soon as possible. Before I could stop myself, I heard myself asking, "Will you marry me, Bella?"

"What?" she asked, smiling faltering slightly. She slipped her hand out of mine, placing it by her other hand as she looked out the window. "Edward, a baby isn't a reason to get married."

"I know that," I said, quietly as I reached over and grabbed her hand back. "But I love you and I already told you that I wanted to marry you."

"I know," she whispered, looking over at me. "I just didn't think you would ask me in the front seat of your car like a horny seventeen year old boy trying to get to home base."

"I guess I see that," I muttered, embarrassedly. I shook my head as I looked out the window. "Just forget I said anything."

"I don't want to forget," she said. I looked over at her. "I just want…no, I need to know that you aren't asking me now, right now, because I am pregnant. I need to know that you want to marry me right now, because you know that I am ready to be your wife. Because I'm not so sure I am."

"I wouldn't be asking you if I didn't think that you would be the perfect wife for me," I said, smile. Her smile dropped.

"Edward, I will never be the perfect wife," she muttered, darkly.

"Oh, Bella," I smiled, shaking my head as I brought our joined hands to my lips. "You already are. You don't take my shit. You fight for what you want. You make me clean the bathroom and take out the trash. You are perfect for me."

"That might be the sweetest thing I have ever heard," she whispered, letting her tears fall down her face.

"I certainly hope not," I said, laughing softly. "I'll propose better if you want me to but…I really do want to marry you."

"I don't want you to propose again," she murmured, leaning across the consol and pressed her lips against mine. "Yes."

"Yes, you'll marry me?" I asked, smiling against her lips. Bella laughed as she leaned back.

"Yes, I'll marry you, Edward," she smiled. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I murmured, kissing her again. Bella kissed me back for a moment before she giggling. I pulled back from her. "Should you giggle when I kiss you?"

"No," she laughed, shaking her head. "But your mom has been standing in front of the window for five minutes. I think she thinks we are fighting."

"Hmm," I snorted, looking over at the house. Sure, enough their was Esme standing in front of the front window. "We had better get inside before she comes out and kicks my ass."

"I'd protect you," smirked Bella.

"Sure you would," I laughed, climbing out of the car. Bella met me in front of my car. I pulled her against me and kissed her once more. "Are you ready to face them?"

"Yes," she smiled. "Do we tell them about us getting married?"

"Not until I get a ring on this finger," I laughed, bringing her hand up to my lips. "My mother would kill me and so would Alice."

"And Emmett," added Bella.

"And Charlie," I said, smiling.

"And Carlisle," we said together.

"Ok, we don't tell anyone, anything," I laughed.

Bella slipped her arm around my waist as we headed up the front walk. Esme disappeared from the window only to reappear a few minutes later when she swung the front door open. There was an irritated look on her face and I had to bite my tongue to stop myself from laughing out loud. My mother worried about the silliest little things.

"You two are fighting, aren't you?" asked Esme, looking from me to Bella once before turning her glare onto me. "Edward, what did you do?"

"I didn't do anything," I said, defending myself. I could feel Bella laughing silently as she turned into my chest. "We are not fighting. We were talking."

"Talking," snorted Emmett, walking past us. "Is that what the kids are calling it nowadays, Eddie?"

"Yes, Emmie," smirked Bella, pulling away from me. She went over and placed her hand on his shoulder, pulling him down to ear level. "He's amazingly talented with his fingers. You should have him give you some tips to keep Rose satisfied."

As Jasper, Alice, Rose, and I laughed over Emmett's red checks, Esme gasped and threw her hand over her mouth, trying desperately to stop the laughter that I knew was bubbling out of her mouth. She turned and ran into the kitchen. A moment later, we heard her start laughing hysterically. Charlie and Carlisle came rushing out of the kitchen and looked over at us.

"What the hell is going on here?" asked Carlisle, looking around at all of us.

"Nothing," we all muttered. They both rolled their eyes and looked at each other.

"Yeah right," they both said, snorting.

"We'll let it go for now," said Charlie. He went over and hugged Bella. "How's my favorite girl tonight?"

"I'm good," smiled Bella, looking right at me as she laid her head on her father's chest. "I've never been better."


	35. Chapter 35

Thirty-five

BPOV

"I am never moving again," I groaned from my place on the bathroom floor. I was currently curled up on the floor in front of the toilet for at least the fifth time this morning.

"It's going to be kind of hard to head to the doctors if you are staying here," commented Edward, squatted down next to me. I held up my hand and flipped him the bird. "That was rude."

"I don't care," I muttered. "Every time I move, I get sick again."

"But that's a good thing, right?" he asked, pushing my hair out of my face. "More morning sickness means the baby is doing good."

"So they say," I muttered, sitting up. I placed my hand on my stomach. "But it's not morning sickness. It's all day sickness and it sucks ass."

"I'm sorry, love," murmured Edward, placing his hand over mine. "But we have to leave now if we are going to make it to the doctors in time for your appointment."

"Fine, but we are taking your car," I grumbled. "I would rather not puke in my nice new car."

"Deal," snorted Edward, helping me to my feet.

I managed to slip on my shoes and make it to the car without throwing up again. Edward helped me into the passenger side. I pulled on my seatbelt and curled up as much as I could. Edward climbed into the drivers seat and headed out of the driveway and towards Amarillo for my first appointment with my new doctor.

It has been three weeks since I found out I was pregnant. When I called to make an appointment, I was told that they would see me when I was eight weeks along. Based on the first day of my last period, I hit eight weeks yesterday and I had been miserable. I started throwing up every morning a few days after my trip to Walmart. Of course, at the time it was a relief because morning sickness was suppose to mean that the baby was growing. Something about the hormones and chemicals. I don't really know but Edward said that everything he looked up said that morning sickness was a good thing.

I looked over at my fiancé. My sweet, handsome, loving fiancé who has been with me every morning while I was puking my guts up. How lucky I was to have him right now. Edward's reaction to the baby was surprising. I don't really know why, but it was. He was so happy. How could I ever have thought that he wouldn't want me or our baby?

"What are you looking at?" he asked, looking over at me.

"You," I said, shrugging my shoulders.

"Why?" he asked.

"Cause you are so handsome," I said, smiling. Edward snorted and looked back at the road.

"You don't see me very clearly," he chuckled.

"Yes, I do," I murmured. "You are handsome, Edward."

"I have chicken pox scars on my forehead," he said.

"Adorable," I smiled.

"I still have freckles," he said.

"Beautiful," I whispered, reaching up and cupping his face. "My mom used to call them angel kisses."

"I remember her saying that," he said, quietly. "I hated it."

"That's why she said it," I giggled. "She loved to get you all riled up."

"I knew it," he grumbled. I laughed harder as he scowled. "It's not funny, Bella."

"Oh, it's completely funny," I said, smiling. "She loved you, Edward. She used to tell Esme that she picked on you because you weren't afraid to fight back."

"She did?" he asked, looking over at me.

"Yeah," I murmured, looking out the window. "You teased her back. Emmett and Alice would get all upset when she tried with them. She said it was like you were fighting for a place in our family. I think she was right."

Edward reached over and grabbed my hand but didn't say anything else. Half an hour later, he pulled his car up in front of the Women's Health Center in Amarillo. We climbed out of his car and headed inside. My doctor, Dr. Charlotte Davis, was located on the fifth floor. It only took us a few minutes to reach her floor. Edward and I walked over and stood in front of the receptionist.

"Hi," smiled the small blond woman as she looked from me to Edward. "I'm Jane. How can I help you today?"

"I have an appointment with Dr. Davis," I murmured.

"What's your name, honey?" she asked, smiling even bigger.

"Isabella Swan," I said, quietly.

"I have your file right here," she murmured, pulling my file out of her stack. She placed at least ten different forms on a clipboard and handed it to me, along with a pen. "I need you to fill out all of these, front and back. I also need a copy of your insurance card."

"Um, ok," I muttered, fishing my wallet out of my purse. I handed her my card.

"I'll get this right back to you," she smiled.

I turned and headed over to a small sofa next to the window. Edward sat down next to me and stated flipping through a copy of Women's health while I started filling out my paper work. They asked everything from my medical history to my sexual history. I was surprised that they didn't ask me what my favorite position was.

Once I had filled out every page, I took the clipboard back up to Jane. She handed me my insurance card back and told me they would call me back in a few minutes. I thanked her before going back over and sitting down next to Edward. I was starting to freak out. I was so worried about the baby. What if there was something wrong with him or her? What if they were dead and I didn't know it? I took a deep breath as I shook my head, trying to push those thoughts out of my head.

"You ok?" asked Edward. I looked over at him and opened my mouth.

"Isabella Swan?" I looked over and saw a tall dark haired woman standing to the door that lead to the back. "Is there an Isabella Swan here?"

"That's me," I said, clearing my throat as I stood up. She looked over at me and smiled.

"It's nice to meet you, Isabella," she said, holding the door open with her foot as Edward and I headed over to her. "I'm Heidi, Dr. Davis' nurse."

"Please call me Bella," I muttered. "This is Edward, my fiancé."

"Bella it is," she smiled. "It's nice to meet you, Edward. If you both will follow me back, we'll get this party started."

I laughed nervously as I followed Heidi into the back. I was so thankful that Edward could come back with me. I was already so nervous and I knew I was going to need him to get through this. Heidi took my vitals, weighed me, and took about four vials of blood before she had me go into the bathroom and pee in a plastic cup. Once I had done that, I followed her into a small examination room.

"Dr. Davis will be with you in just a moment," said Heidi. "I need you to strip out of everything and put on a gown."

"Ok," I muttered, blushing.

Heidi shut the door behind her and I pulled the curtain shut behind me. I stripped off everything and pulled on the pink gown that sat on the shelf for me. I held it closed around me as I stepped out of the dressing area and climbed onto the table. Edward was immediately at my side, slipping his arm around my waist.

"Are you ok?" he asked. "You're shaking."

"Knock, knock." I turned back and looked at the door was pushed open by a tall, thin woman with dark black hair and bright blue eyes. She couldn't have been much older than me. "Can I come in?"

"Of course," I said, quietly. She shut the door behind her and moved over so that she was standing in front of me, offering me her hand.

"I'm Charlotte Davis," she said, smiling.

"Bella Swan," I murmured, shaking her hand.

"Why are you so nervous?" she asked, holding onto my hand. "Your hand is shaking."

"Oh," I muttered, pulling my hand out of her. "Just…anxious, I guess."

"Ok," she said, slowly. She sat back on her stool and started looking over my folder. "I see here that you had a miscarriage back in May."

"Yes, I was ten weeks along," I explained. "The ER doctor told me it was a blighted ovum."

"Did you follow up with your ob/gyn?" she asked, looking up at me.

"No, I left Chicago a couple days later," I muttered.

"I see," she murmured, looking back down at my chart. "Did you see a doctor before your tenth week?"

"No," I said. "I was supposed to but I couldn't keep the appointment."

"Why?" asked Charlotte, looking up at me. I ducked my head. "Bella, it's important that I know everything."

"I couldn't keep the appointment," I muttered, "because my husband had beaten me the night before my appointment. He told me that I couldn't go to the doctor until the bruises faded."

"I see," she said, harshly. I looked up at her and saw that she was glaring at Edward. "Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to wait out in the waiting room."

"Wait, he isn't my husband," I said, quickly. Charlotte looked over at me. "This is Edward Cullen, my fiancé."

"Ok," she said, slowly.

"I left my husband after the miscarriage. He was killed while in jail," I explained.

"I see," she murmured, looking back over at Edward. "I apologize, Mr. Cullen."

"Don't worry about it," said Edward. "Call me Edward."

"Ok, Edward," she said, smiling as she looked back over at me. "I apologize, Bella. I don't tolerate abusive men."

"It's fine," I muttered, softly. Charlotte looked back down at my chart.

"Well, the urine test came back fine. You are indeed pregnant," she said, looking up at me and smiling. "According to this, you are due around May fifteenth, give or take a week or two. How have you been feeling?"

"Like crap," I chuckled, smiling softly. She laughed with me. "I've had some pretty serious morning sickness."

"That should go away in a handful of weeks," she smiled. "Try eating several small meals and keep some crackers on the table next to the bed. It might help."

"Certainly can't hurt," I said.

"Any cramps or bleeding?" she asked, closing my chart and setting it on the counter.

"No," I muttered.

"Ok, well, I'd like to do a full exam and then we will do an ultrasound, just to check on the baby," she said, patting my knee.

"Ok," I murmured as I looked over at Edward. "Edward doesn't have to leave, does he?"

"No," said Charlotte. "Not if you don't want him to."

"I don't," I whispered.

I laid back on the table and placed my feet in the stirrups. Edward moved over and grabbed my hand, keeping his eyes locked on mine. Charlotte was quick as she performed her internal exam. It was just an odd feeling to feel someone shoving their fingers into your vagina. After she got done with that part of the exam, she moved up and performed a breast exam.

It may have been my imagination but I could have sworn that I heard Edward moan when Charlotte started feeling my breast. I looked up at him but he looked away. Charlotte laughed under her breath as she pulled the sides of my gown shut and moved to the end of the table. She sat back down and pulled her ultrasound machine over.

"Hit the lights for me, Edward," she said.

As Edward moved over and turned off the lights, Charlotte started her machine. He moved back over to the other side of the table and grabbed my hand. She squirted some gel on my abdomen. She pulled her wand out and started moving it over my abdomen. After several minutes, she looked up at us and smiled, turning the screen towards us.

"Meet your baby," she said, quietly.

I could feel my tears slipping down my face when I looked over and saw our baby on the screen. He or she wasn't more than a little blob right now but he or she was ours. Right in the middle, was the most beautiful sight I had ever seen; his or her heart beating.

I let out the breath I had been holding and looked over at Edward. He was staring at the screen with a look of complete and utter awe on his face. I raised my hand up to his cheek, wiping off his tears. He looked down at me and smiled.

"That's us," he whispered as a tear fell down his face. "That's our love right there."

"He or she is beautiful," I murmured.

"Yes, he or she is," he smiled.

"Ok, well, everything looks fantastic," said Charlotte, breaking us out of our little bubble. We looked over at her. "I want to see you in four weeks. If you feel any cramping at all, call me. If you see one drop of blood on your panties, call me. Understand?"

"I will," I smiled as she cleaned the gel off my stomach.

"Good," she said, helping me sit back up. "I am going to leave a prescription for some vitamins along with some photos of your wee baby. Take them everyday and congratulations to the two of you."

"Thank you, Dr. Davis," I said, smiling.

"Call me Charlotte," she said, picking up my chart. "Have a nice day."

"We will," said Edward, smiling at her.

Charlotte left us alone and I quickly changed back into my clothes. Edward and I headed back out front and set up my next appointment before we left. I couldn't seem to stop smiling as we loaded into the car. I looked over at Edward and saw him smiling as well. He started the car and looked over at me.

"Would you mind going someplace with me?" he asked.

"Where?" I asked.

"It's a surprise," he chuckled.

"Ok," I said, smiling at him.

Edward's smile grew as he shifted his car into reverse and pulled out of the parking lot. He drove us around the health center to the large park that sat about a hundred yards away. I thought we were going to stop there but he didn't. Instead, he pulled up in front of the Botanical Garden. He cut the engine and climbed out of the car. He came around and offered me his hand, which I gladly gave.

We headed inside the small garden and started walking through the flowers. My mother would have loved this place. Renee always had fresh flowers in our house. We had been walking for several minutes when Edward stopped and turned to me. He smiled as he brought his hands up to my face.

"I can't tell you how much I love you, Bella," he said, quietly. There were tears swimming in his eyes. "Seeing our baby on that screen, knowing that we made him or her, reconfirms that you and I are perfect for each other."

"Edward," I whispered. Edward dropped down to one knee in front of me and pulled out a black, velvet box. I gasped as he pulled my left hand toward him. "Oh, Edward."

"Isabella Marie Swan, will you marry me?" he asked.

"Yes," I cried. Edward opened the box and I gasped again. Nested inside the black velvet was a solitaire, princess cut diamond ring. My mother's engagement ring. "How'd you get my mom's ring?"

"From your father," he said, sliding the ring onto my finger. He stood up and brought our hands up to his chest. "I had to ask his permission."

"But when?" I asked.

"Before we went to Colorado," he smirked. My mouth fell open. "I was just waiting for the right moment. It was today."

"Thank you, Edward," I cried, softly. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too," he murmured, kissing me. "And our son or daughter."


	36. Chapter 36

Thirty-six

I woke up the next morning when I felt my stomach tighten. I scrambled out of mine and Edward's bed and rushed into the bathroom. I made it just in time and bent over the bowl and tossed up everything I had managed to eat last night. Not even three seconds later, I felt Edward kneeling behind me and pulling my hair out of my face. He was a good man.

"Better, love?" he asked, a minute later.

"For now," I muttered, flushing the toilet and sitting on my ass. I grabbed the washcloth from the counter and started wiping my face off. "I really detest throwing up. I can handle anything else but I hate throwing up with a passion."

"I know you do," murmured Edward, sitting down next to me. I leaned my head over into his shoulder and sighed. "It can't last forever, though, right?"

"God, I hope not," I giggled, softly.

I hooked my arm in with his and looked down. Seeing my mother's engagement ring sitting on my left hand was surreal. I kept replaying the moment when Edward asked me to be his wife. Who knew that when I ran from my abusive husband a handful of months ago that I would have found the man I was meant to be with. The man who loved me for me and didn't expect me to change who I was just to please him. I found myself falling in love with him more and more everyday.

"Did you fall asleep?" he asked.

"No, I was just thinking," I murmured.

"About what?" he asked. I looked up at him.

"Us getting married," I said, smiling. "I don't want to wait. I want to get married as soon as we can."

"Ok," he said, returning my smile. "I guess we have a few things to discuss but can we go back into our room? This floor is killing my ass."

"Sure," I laughed.

Edward stood up and pulled me to my feet. He kept my hand in his as we walked back into our room and climbed onto our bed. He grabbed the bottle of water sitting on my nightstand and handed it to me with a look that clearly said drink this or I am calling Esme. I stifled the urge to roll my eyes and took a hearty swig. He was worried about me and the baby. Just one more way that he was completely amazing.

"Ok, so when do you want to get married?" he asked, pulling me back so that we were laying against our pillows.

"Tonight in Vegas?" I asked, hopefully. Edward cocked an eyebrow at me. "Yeah, I didn't think so but I had to at least try."

"It's not that I would mind but we both know our family would kill us," he smiled.

"I know. How about next weekend?" I said, rolling onto my side and looking at him. "I know that only gives us a week to get everything arranged but I don't want to wait."

"Hmm, a week," he mused, nodding his head. "You do realize that Alice and Esme aren't going to be happy with trying to put together a wedding in a handful of days."

"I do but it's not about what they want," I said, quietly. "I've had the big, flashy wedding, Edward, and I don't want that again. Do you? Because I won't take that away from you if that is something that you want."

"All I want is to be able to slide that ring on your finger and let everyone know that you picked me," he smiled. "I just want you to be happy."

I smiled as laid my head on his shoulder. "As long as I have you, then I am happy."

"Ok, then next weekend it is," he murmured, slipping his arm under me and pulling me against his chest. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I whispered.

I must have drifted off to sleep while laying in Edward's arms. I woke up when I heard Edward talking in the living room. I climbed out of bed and stumbled out of the room, trying very hard to push back the nauseous feeling that I was still feeling. Edward looked up at me and smiled but held his hand up to stop me from speaking. I moved over and climbed onto the couch next to him, curling my body up against the cushions.

"Ok, Mom, we'll be there," said Edward. "Yes, I'll bring the ice…love you, too….bye."

"What did Esme want?" I asked.

"Well, I thought we should let them know that we were going to be planning a wedding for next weekend," smiled Edward, pulling me into his lap. "But before I could invite them to dinner here, she invited us to dinner at their house."

"Good, cause I don't feel like cooking," I murmured, nestling my head into his neck.

"I didn't think you would be," he said, quietly. "Are you still feeling sick?"

"Yes," I frowned.

"Would you like to take a bath?" he asked. I pulled back and looked at him.

"Will you take one with me?" I asked.

"Of course, I will," he smiled.

Edward stood up with me in his arms. I giggled as I wrapped my arms around his shoulders. He carried me into the bathroom and set me on the ground before he reached down and started the water in to tub. I stripped off my clothes and climbed in. The water was warm but not too hot. Edward stripped off his clothes and climbed in behind me, pulling me up against him.

"Hmm," I murmured, closing my eyes. "This is nice."

"It is quite nice," whispered Edward, wrapping his arms around me. "I think I could stay like this forever."

"You would get awfully wrinkled," I said, laughing.

"But you would still love," he chuckled.

"I really would," I giggled, running my hand over my flat stomach. "Are you still going to love me when I get fat?"

"Every inch of you," murmured Edward, kissing the top of my head.

Edward and I stayed in the tub until the water turned cold. We climbed out, dried off, and headed back into our room. We spent the rest of the day in bed, watching television and just enjoying the feeling of being in each other's arms. It was in the small moments like this that I felt the happiest. When Edward held me and we didn't have any worries in the world.

But like all good times, eventually we had to climb out of our bed. We changed out of our ratty pajamas and into real clothes, as Alice was sure to call them. Edward and I both slipped on a pair of jeans and t-shirts; his was black and mine was purple. Once we had our shoes on, we climbed into my car and headed over to his parents house for dinner.

I would be lying if I said that I wasn't a little nervous about how they would react to the news of our upcoming wedding. It wasn't so much that we were getting married but the fact that we wanted to do it so quickly, that I knew they would be upset about. In my heart, I knew that this was right for us and it was time to start listening to my heart and not what my head was telling me. It was time for me to move onto the next stage in my life and that stage included having Edward as my husband.

"Are you ready?" he asked, parking behind Alice's Porsche.

"Yes," I smiled, looking over at him. "Let's get this shit over with."

Edward laughed as he climbed out of the car. I followed him and met him on the sidewalk. He wrapped his arm around my waist as we headed up the front walk. We had just stepped out into the front porch when the door was thrown open. I expected it to be Esme but it wasn't. It was Charlie. He stepped out and shut the door behind him before I could say anything.

"Dad, what-"

"Look, I've got to warn you," he said, hurriedly. "Alice has already forced me into this but you have time to save yourselves. She's going to ask you to help with the haunted house down at the fire station. Don't do it. Just trust me on this."

"Dad-"

I was interrupted when the door opened once again. Charlie spun around and saw Alice standing there with her arms folded across her chest and a smirk sitting on her lips. Clearly, she had heard every word that he had said. Edward was laughing silently next to me. Like we didn't know just how demanding the pixie could be.

"Charlie Swan, all I asked you to do was let us use your truck to get everything out of storage," said Alice, shaking her head. "It's not like I've asked you to cut off your right arm."

"Alice-"

"No, I heard you warning them not to help with the haunted house," laughed Alice, bringing her hands down onto her hips. "Just for that, I'm going to put you in charge of the clean up committee."

"Who else is on it?" asked Charlie, warily.

"Just you," smirked Alice.

Charlie groaned and dropped his head into his chest in defeat. He really should learn to just keep his mouth shut when it comes to Alice. He would have saved himself so much aggravation. Edward and I followed him into the house and Alice shut the door behind us. Jasper, Emmett, and Rose were setting the table and laughing at my father. He muttered something about us always picking on him as he walked into the kitchen. _Poor Charlie_.

"Everyone, come sit," cheered Esme, walked out of the kitchen with her hands wrapped around a large plate of fried chicken.

As soon as the smell hit me, my stomach lurched and I felt the crackers I had nibbled on coming back up. I slammed my hand over my mouth, ripped myself out of Edward's arms, and ran down the hall to the guest bathroom. I dropped to my knees in front of the toilet and threw up several times.

"It's ok, baby," murmured Edward, pulling my hair out of face for me. I felt it as he placed a wet cloth on the back of my neck.

"Sorry," I croaked. My throat was raw from throwing up and my sides and stomach muscles were sore.

"Don't be sorry, you haven't done anything wrong," he said as I pulled back and sat down on the cold floor. "Better?"

"Yeah," I said, taking a deep breath. "Well, I guess we should get back out there."

"When you're ready," smiled Edward.

"I'm ready," I murmured.

Edward helped me stand up and we headed back out into the living room. Everyone was standing around, waiting for us. As soon as they saw the two of us, they all relaxed and took a deep breath. They had clearly been worried about me being sick but I think they were overreacting. It's not it's the first time I have ever been sick.

"Bella, sweetheart, are you ok?" asked Esme, moving over and placing her hands on my forehead. "You don't feel warm. Carlisle, come look at her," said Esme, before I could say anything.

"Esme, I'm fine," I insisted, pulling my face out of her hands.

"Are you sure, Bella?" asked Charlie. He and Carlisle came over and each placed a hand on my face; Charlie's on my cheek while Carlisle put his on my forehead. "You're clammy."

"God, get the hell off of me," I snapped, pushing both of their hands off of me. "I'm fine."

"Bella-"

"Guys, give her some breathing room," sighed Edward, pulling me away from them. "She's fine."

"Ok," said Esme, slowly. "I guess we should start dinner."

Edward and I followed everyone over to the dining room table. Carlisle sat on one end of the table with Esme next to him. Charlie sat on the other end of the table. He had a very worried look on his face. He looked from me to Edward a couple times and shook his head. Emmett and Rose sat next to Esme while Alice and Jasper sat on the same side of the table as Edward and I did.

Everyone started fixing their plates and it was taking every bit of my control not to lose it again. I loved fried chicken but right now it was smelling disgusting. I grabbed a spoon full of mashed potatoes and some green beans but left the chicken alone. Edward placed his hand on the back of my chair and cleared his throat to get everyone's attention, not that he needed to do that. They were all being eerily quiet as it was.

"Bella and I have something we would like to tell you," said Edward, smiling as he looked around at everyone. "We are getting married."

For a split second, everyone was deathly quiet. Then they all erupted in cheers and squeals. The squeaks mostly came from Alice and Esme. They pulled me into their arms, squishing me between them. I guess it was safe to say that they were happy for us.

"Oh, Bella, this is so exciting!" squealed Alice, pulling back. She brought her hands up to my face. "You're finally going to be my sister!"

"I guess I am," I giggled.

"Congratulations, sweetheart," smiled Esme, kissing my forehead. She turned and brought Edward into her arms. "You too, Edward."

"Thanks, Mom," he laughed, hugging her.

"Bella, honey, I'm happy for you," said Charlie, pulling me into his arms. I laid my head on his chest and wrapped my arms around him.

"Thank you, Daddy," I murmured, feeling my tears spring up. Stupid ass hormones.

I pulled back and looked over at Emmett and Rose, who were cuddled together, but smiling at us. It was clear to me how much they loved each other. Emmett stood up and opened his arms up to me. I smiled as I walked around the table and hugged my surrogate big brother. Emmett wrapped his arms around me and lifted me off my feet.

"Em, need to breathe," I laughed, holding onto him.

"Oops," he chuckled, setting me back down onto my feet. "I'm happy for you, Bella. You and Eddie-"

"Edward," sighed my handsome fiancé. "The name is Edward, not Eddie."

"You and Eddie," said Emmett, again, "deserve to be happy."

"Thank you, Emmett," I said, smiling. I looked over at Rose, who looked like she was on the verge of tears. "So do you and Rose."

"I know," he smiled, winking at me. "All in due time."

"What he means is that one day, I might say yes when he asks," smirked Rose, hugging me. She brought her lips down to my ear. "I'm proud of you, Bella."

"Thank you, Rose," I whispered.

I pulled back and was fixing to head over to my seat when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked back and saw Carlisle standing there, smiling at me and Edward. I turned and slipped my arms around him, hugging him as tightly as I could.

"Congratulations," he whispered.

"Thank you, Carlisle," I murmured. I pulled back from him and turned back to Edward. He smiled and slipped his arm around my waist as we headed back around the table and took our seats. That was the easy part.

"I can't believe you two are going to get married," sighed Alice, smiling. "I think you should have a June wedding. It would be beautiful."

"We are getting married next weekend," I murmured.

Everyone at the table, except for Edward, looked over at me. I could see the looks of disappointment on Esme and Alice's face. Jasper looked neutral but he was watching his wife closely, waiting for her to let me have it with both barrels. I opened my mouth to speak but was cut off before I had the chance to.

"No," said Alice, shaking her head. "You have to give us time to plan the perfect wedding for you both."

"We have invitations, flowers, locations, dresses," said Esme, listing off items. "There is way too much to plan to be able to get it all done in a week. I mean, we haven't announced your engagement yet. We need to have pictures done and then there is the engagement party…"

As she and Alice rambled on about caterers, floral arraignments, and wedding colors, Edward and I leaned back in our seats and just listened to them. I looked up at him and frowned, knowing that this wasn't going to be easy at all for them to understand. Edward slipped his hand into mine and brought our hands up to his lips, placing a gentle kiss on the ring that sat on my finger.

"Everyone, shut up!" snapped Charlie, slamming his hand on the table as he stood up. Esme and Alice both gasped but stopped talking. Charlie took a deep breath and looked over at me and Edward. "Now, are you sure that the two of you want to get married next weekend?"

"Yes," we said together.

"I don't want another big wedding," I explained. "All I want is to marry Edward."

"Same for me," smiled Edward. "I just want her to be my wife."

"Ok," said Charlie, nodding his head. He looked over at Esme and Alice. "They've made their decision and we should accept it."

"But-"

"There are no buts, Alice," I said, turning to my best friend. I grabbed her hand in my free hand. "I love you, Alice, but I won't let you bully me into a big wedding. Please, just accept this as it is."

"Bella," she whispered, shaking her head. "Fine."

"Bella, sweetheart," started Esme. I nearly rolled my eyes at her. She was using her mom voice on me. I smiled inwardly as I thought about the fact that one day I would be using that same voice on mine and Edward's child. "Please, think about this," she said, pulling me out of my inner ramblings. "Just give us until Christmas. We can plan something nice for then."

"No," I said, firmly. "I won't wait and I won't let you or anyone try to talk me into doing something that Edward and I don't want. We have made our decision and we are going to get married next weekend, whether you like it or not."

Esme sighed and leaned back in her seat. "Since you are leaving me so many options," she snorted. "I guess we have a lot of work to do this week."

"Yes, we do," I said, smiling at her. As we started discussing plans, I looked up at Edward. Now that that was done with, we would have to decide when to tell them about the baby.


	37. Chapter 37

Thirty-seven

Monday morning started off just splendidly. Just splendidly, indeed. I woke up, ran into the bathroom and threw up. Took a shower, threw up again. Got dressed, threw up once more. Walked into the kitchen and, after the first hint of toast hit my nose, took off running into the bathroom and threw up once again. It was a vicious, vicious cycle that I really wanted to stop.

Eventually, I managed to get some control over my stomach and headed off to work, leaving a very worried Edward behind. He had been at my side each and every time and I knew he was worried that I was too sick. Honestly, so was I. That's why I called Charlotte as soon as I got into my library. She wasn't in yet so I left a message for her to call me back. Maybe she could give me something to help because I was tired of spending my days folded over the toilet.

I had just dropped my cell phone onto my desk when the door to my library was thrown open and a very pissed off looking Kate came storming into the room, followed by Garrett, who looked both amused and scared of his wife. I knew that Kate was all bark and no bite, though.

"Isabella Swan, why wasn't I informed of the fact that you and Eddie are getting hitched this weekend?" demanded Kate. I opened my mouth to answer her but I got a whiff of either her perfume or Garrett's cologne and my stomach started turning. I dropped to my knees and bent over my trashcan and proceeded to dry heave. "Bella!"

Kate and Garrett came rushing around the desk. She pulled my hair out of my face while Garrett started patting me on the back, awkwardly. "Are you ok, Bella?" he asked.

"I'm fine," I muttered, taking a deep breath. "Sorry, I…"

"Hey, don't worry about it," he said, helping me stand back up. Kate released my hair but brought her hands up to my forehead.

"You don't feel warm," she fretted.

"I'm fine," I said, pulling away from them both. "And I'm sorry for not calling you yesterday but Edward and I only just decided to have the wedding next weekend and I've been kind of busy dealing with the Alice and Esme, who are trying to plan the wedding of the year in just a few short days."

"Hmm," she hummed, helping me sit down behind my desk. "Ok, well, I guess I can forgive you then. You should be home and in bed if you are sick."

"I am not sick," I muttered, running my hands through my hair.

"Bella, you just wretched in the trash," said Kate as the first bell rang. "Crap, I've gotta go. Garrett, send her home."

"Kate," I said but she was already out of the library and probably halfway down to her classroom.

"Come on, Bella," sighed Garrett, pulling me to my feet. "I'll help you out to your car."

"I'm fine," I said, pulling my arm out of his hand. "I can stay and work."

"Bella-"

"No, I am not going home," I snapped. "I am not sick."

"You are going home," he said, forcefully. "I can't have you in here upchucking in the trashcan with all the kids around and that is the end of it."

"Fine," I muttered, picking my purse, keys, and cell phone up. I pushed past him and headed over to the door.

"Bella," he sighed. I stopped and looked back at him. "Congratulations on your engagement."

"Thanks," I said, quietly. "If my library is a mess when I come back tomorrow, then I am going to be very upset."

"I know," he laughed.

Edward had already gone to teach his class when I got back to the house. I changed into a pair of sweats and one of his t-shirts and settled down on the couch, willing the ache in my tummy to stop hurting. I had never considered myself to be a wuss but I never took to being nauseous very well. Renee always made me a bed on the couch. She would pull my Strawberry Shortcake blanket off my bed and the two of us would cuddle on the couch together, watching movies. God, I missed her terribly.

I must have fallen asleep on the couch because the next thing I knew I was being shaken awake when I heard someone banging on the front door. I was getting tired of everyone coming over and banging on our front door all the time. Groaning to myself, I threw the blanket off of me and stumbled over to the door. I pulled the door open and found Charlie standing there with a white plastic bag that had two white styrofoam containers in them. He smiled and started to speak but whatever food he was carrying, wafted up at me and my stomach turned…again.

"UGH," I cried, slamming my hand over my mouth and taking off toward the bathroom.

Charlie didn't say anything as he followed me into the bathroom. I fell to my knees as soon as I hit the door and crawled over to the toilet. My father pulled back my hair. "You're ok, honey."

"Daddy," I cried suddenly feeling like a little girl. Charlie grabbed a washcloth from the vanity and wet it. He started sponging off the back of my neck, still holding my hair back out of my face. "Thanks."

"You're welcome," he said, quietly. "Do you think you can head back into the living room?"

"Depends," I muttered.

"On?"

"Where you left that shit you were holding?" I asked, smiling at him.

"I left our lunch on the porch," he laughed, standing up.

Charlie pulled me to my feet and led me back into the living room. He gently pushed me back down on the couch before heading into the kitchen. He came back out a moment later with a sleeve of saltine crackers and a glass of what looked like cream soda. He placed them both on the coffee table and covered my legs with the blanket that I had thrown on the floor.

"Here," he said, handing me the glass. "Cream soda always helped your mom when she was having bouts of morning sickness."

"Thanks," I said. I lifted the glass to my lips but froze before I actually took a drink. "Wait…what?"

"Don't look at me like that, Bella," he laughed. "I knew you were pregnant as soon as you ran from fried chicken. You love fried chicken."

"Oh," I muttered, sipping on the soda. "Are you mad?"

"Why would I be mad?" he asked, smiling. "I'm getting me a grandchild to spoil rotten."

"You will, too," I chuckled.

"How far along are you?" he asked.

"Almost ten weeks," I smiled.

"Only a few more weeks of morning sickness left," he chuckled. "Renee was really sick with you, too. She always said you were worth it, though. I think she was right."

"You only think she was right?" I asked, cocking an eyebrow at him.

"I'm still deciding," he said, winking at me. I rolled my eyes at my father.

"I'm telling myself that this little one is worth it, too, but I got sent home from work today because I got sick at school," I explained. "I can't keep missing work or I am going to lose my job."

"Have you called your doctor?" he asked, sitting back on the couch.

"Yeah, waiting for her to call me back," I said.

"When are you due?" he asked.

"Middle of May," I smiled. "Around Mom's birthday."

"Good time of the year," he laughed. "It won't be too hot."

"Thank god," I murmured, setting my glass back onto the table.

"And everything looks ok with the baby, right?" he asked.

"Yeah," I smiled. "We had an ultrasound done a couple of weeks ago. Do you want to see the pictures?"

"Yes," he said, eagerly. I started to get up but he pushed me back. "Tell me where they are and I'll get them."

"They are in my purse," I said. Charlie stood up and grabbed my purse for me. I dug the photos out and handed them to him.

"Wow," he murmured.

As Charlie gazed over the pictures of mine and Edward's unborn child, I saw his eyes fill up with tears and his bottom lip started to tremble. I hadn't seen my father cry very much in my lifetime and to see him becoming this emotional over my child, his grandchild, brought tears to my own eyes.

"He or she is beautiful," he whispered, looking up at me. "Looks like you."

"It's a blob," I laughed, through my tears.

"A beautiful blob," he chuckled, laying the pictures on the table. He reached out and grabbed my hand. "Are you happy, honey?"

"I've never been happier, Daddy," I cried, "but I'm scared that I'm going to lose this baby. That's why we haven't told anyone yet. I love Edward so much and I love this baby so much, Daddy. I don't think I could live without either of them."

"You won't have to," he said, pulling me into his lap and holding me in his arms. "Edward loves you too much to let you go and this baby is your second chance to having the family you were meant to have, with the man you were meant to have it with."

"Thank you for giving him Mom's ring," I whispered. "I feel like she's here with me."

"She is," he murmured. "I can feel her too. I miss her."

"I miss her, too."

The last thing I remember before I drifted off to sleep was feeling Charlie kiss the top of my head and the sound of the front door being closed behind him. I dreamed that Renee was sitting on the end of the couch, rubbing my feet while we watched The Parent Trap and recited every line together. It wasn't until I felt a soft hand pushing a strand of hair out of my face that I realized I wasn't alone. I slowly opened my eyes and found myself face to face with Edward. He was kneeling down next to me, smiling his sexy crooked smile. I raised my hand up and stroked his cheek, causing his smile to grow and his eyes to flitter to a close.

"You were talking in your sleep," he whispered. "To your mom."

"I was dreaming of her," I murmured. "Are you home for the day?"

"No, I have another class this afternoon but Charlie called and told me that you were home sick, so I came by to check on you," explained Edward. "Why didn't you call me?"

"You were trying to teach those kids math," I said, smiling at him. "Besides, I'm not sick. Just pregnant."

"You've been really sick, though," he frowned. "You're losing weight."

"I called Charlotte," I murmured. "She hasn't called back yet."

"Ok, I'm going to call her again," sighed Edward, standing up.

I watched as Edward headed into the kitchen and grabbed the house phone. He came back in and settled down on the couch, pulling my feet into his lap while he called her. However, she was in the middle of a delivery so he had to leave another message for her to call back. Edward refilled my cream soda and brought me another blanket, in case I got cold, before he left for his other class.

I spent the afternoon sitting on the couch with my laptop propped up on my lap and worked on my novel. There was nothing on television worth watching during the daytime but re-runs of Law and Order: SVU. My stomach was starting to settle a little just as the phone rang. I picked it up and answered it without even looking at the caller ID.

"Hello," I said.

"Bella, this is Charlotte Davis." I sighed in relief that she was finally calling back. "Sorry it took me while to get back to you. Today has been a very busy day."

"It's fine," I said. "I'm a little concerned about how sick I've been."

"Still around the clock?" she asked.

"Pretty much," I admitted. "I've started losing some weight as well and I'm worried that it's hurting the baby."

"Ok, I can call you in something that will help take the edge off the nausea if you would like," she said. "I would feel better about seeing you next week, though, just to make sure that everything is ok."

"Ok, I can do that," I said, quickly.

"Any headaches, cramps, anything else?" she asked.

"No, I just can't seem to stop throwing up which means I can't eat anything, either."

"I'm going to call something into your pharmacy on file and I will see you next week. Call if you need anything, ok?" she said.

"Ok, thank you, Charlotte," I said, quietly.

"You're welcome," she said, before hanging up.

I sent Edward a text asking him to go by and pick up my prescription from the pharmacy on his way home. The rest of the afternoon was spent working on my book and sipping on my cream soda. It helped but I couldn't live on cream soda alone. Just after four in the afternoon, Edward came into the house, looking tired and glad to be home. He tossed my meds onto the table and sat down next to me on the couch, pulling my feet back onto his lap.

"Rough afternoon?" I asked.

"Yes," he sighed, looking over at me. "One word: Alice."

"Ah," I said, completely understanding. "What'd she do this time?"

"She was waiting for me outside of my classroom with a notebook that contained at least forty different floral arraignments for the wedding. But seeing as my class was fixing to start, I told her that I couldn't do that right now. You would have thought she would have left, right?" he asked.

"If it was anyone other than Alice," I smiled.

"She took a seat in the back of my class and while I was trying to teach the idiots in my class basic factoring, she would hold up a picture for me to look at. I tried to ignore her but you know what she did?" he asked.

"She huffed and puffed until you looked," I said. "Then when you started ignoring that, she started answering your questions that were directed to your students so the class would go faster, didn't she?"

"Yes," he muttered.

"She used the same crap on me when we were seniors to get me to let her pick out my homecoming dress," I explained. "I wanted to go with something simple and neutral but she thought I needed something flamboyant so she picked out this neon orange dress that made me look twice as pale as I already am. Then when I won, she took credit for the win because of the so called amazing dress she picked out for me."

"It did look good on you, though," smirked Edward, giving me the once over. "Hugged you in all the right places."

"Tits and ass," I sighed, laying back on the couch. "All you see are tits and ass."

"That's not all I see," he laughed, placing my laptop on the table. He crawled over so that he was on top of me. "I like your legs, too."

"Yeah?" I asked.

"Yep," he murmured, pulling my legs up and wrapping them around his waist. "I really like them like this."

"Me too," I whispered, pulling on my bottom lip.

Edward moaned and brought his lips down to capture mine. He sucked my lip into his mouth and pressed himself down onto me. I could feel his erection through his pants and I wanted him. I reached down between us and popped the button and lowered his zipper down. Edward moaned against my lips. Just as I was reaching into his pants, someone started banging on the front door.

"Son of a bitch," I muttered.

"Ignore them and feel free to continue what you were doing," he mumbled, assaulting my neck with his lips and tongue. I went to do as he said when we heard it.

"Edward, Bella, we know you are in there," snapped Alice, banging on the door. "Don't make us break the door down."

"Fucking, annoying pixie," grumbled Edward, climbing off of me. He was fixing his pants as he walked over to the door. He pulled the door open and glared at his sister and Esme, who both looked like they were fixing to laugh. "What do you want now, Alice?"

"We need to discuss the menu," said Alice, pushing her way into the house past Edward. Esme sighed and gave her son a small smile as she followed Alice in. Alice plopped down on the couch next to me and thrust a notebook at me. "Ok, so here is what I was thinking. We will do some small finger foods as an appetizer…"

As Alice continues to go on and on about what we should serve at the wedding, I looked over at Edward. The last thing I felt like hearing was about food, seeing as I could barely keep anything down and the mere mention of the items made me want to be sick. He closed his eyes as he came over, ripped the notebook out of Alice's hands and shut it.

"That's enough," he said, firmly.

"Edward-"

"Alice, Bella doesn't need this right now. She doesn't feel good and the last thing she needs is you shoving food in her face," said Edward. "I'm sure that whatever you two decide to serve will be fine."

"But this is your wedding day and it should be your choice," whined Alice.

"Then make sure you have cream soda," I said, picking up my glass and taking a sip.

"Cream soda?" asked Alice.

"Yes," I smiled. "It's so good."

"Ok," she sighed. "Are you sure you don't want more input on the food?"

"I'm sure," I muttered, pushing back the nausea. "Just no chicken."

"Ok," she said, shaking her head. "I will have several dresses at my shop for you to pick from on Wednesday so I need you there right after school."

"Yes, Alice," I said. "Anything else?"

"No, I guess that's it for now," muttered Alice, standing up. "I'm just trying to help, you know."

"And you are," I smiled. "I just don't care about all the details, Ali. All I need to know it when to be at the alter."

"But it's your wedding," she said.

"I know it is," I said, reaching out and grabbing her hand. "I trust you to make it about me and Edward and not about you."

"I'll try," she muttered. "But it's hard."

"You can do it, Ali," I smiled. "I have faith in you."

"Yeah, yeah," she muttered, walking over to the door.

"I tried to get her to calm down but you know she is," sighed Esme, following her daughter out. "Love you both."

"Love you, Esme," I said.

"Yeah, love you, Mom," said Edward. He shut the door behind his mother and sister and looked back at me. "Now where were we?"


	38. Chapter 38

Thirty-eight

Wednesday morning, I was shaken awake when I felt Edward slipping his hand under the hem of my t-shirt. He slowly slid his hand up the side of my body, leaving tingles in his wake, until he reached my breasts. Just as he was sliding his hand across my nipple, he lowered his lips to my ear. His breath tickled my skin, sending a shiver through me and my nipple tightened under his hand.

"Bella," he whispered, kissing the spot behind my ear. "Are you awake, love?"

"I am now," I moaned, arching my body into his. "I love waking up to you touching me, baby."

"I love touching you," he murmured, kneading my breast in his hand.

My boobs were sensitive and the feeling of his hands were causing me to ache with need for more; so much more. Like he could read my mind, Edward slid his hand off my breast and down my belly. He slipped his fingers into the top of my black panties and down to where I wanted him the most. My legs parted on their own like they were begging him to be there. His fingers brushed against my wet core and I bucked my hips into his hand, still needing more. Always needing more.

"More," I begged. "Please, I need more, Edward."

Edward moved so that he was hovering over me but still kept his hand in my panties, rubbing my tender folds. He grabbed the hem of my shirt with his other hand and pulled, silently asking me to take it off. I ripped it off and threw it across the room, not caring that I knocked a bottle of perfume off the dresser. Edward moaned and lowered his lips down to my nipple just as he pushed a single finger into me.

"Oh, fuck!" I moaned, arching my chest toward him. "Your mouth…so…fucking warm!"

"I love your boobies, baby," he groaned, barely letting my nipple out of his mouth as he spoke. "They are so big and firm. I could suck on them all fucking day."

"Oh, God," I cried. Hearing Edward talk dirty was a huge fucking turn on. Hearing Edward talk dirty while he was fucking me with his finger was an even bigger turn on. "More, baby, more."

Edward nudged my legs further apart as he slipped his finger out of me. He pushed up onto his knees and ripped off his sleeping pants and boxers. His cock sprang out and slapped against his stomach as he tossed his clothes onto the floor. Edward lifted my legs up and pushed them back, effectively opening me up even more for him. He watched as he slowly, too slowly, pressed his erection into me.

"Oh, fuck," he hissed. "A-fucking-mazing."

I wanted to agree with him, and I did, but it was like the moment his cock touched the outside of my pussy, I lost the ability to speak. Edward wrapped his arms around my thighs and started pounding into me. There was nothing sweet or gentle about our lovemaking this morning. This morning was about him fucking me, hard and fast. It was about the need we both had to feel each other, to be joined together.

"Baby, you feel so fucking good wrapped around me," he murmured. "Like fucking heaven or some shit."

"Harder," I begged. "Please, fuck me harder."

"Ride me, love," he ordered, slipping his cock out of me.

Edward fell back on the bed and I quickly scrambled over and straddled his waist. I pushed up in my knees and slowly took him into my body. Edward's hands went straight to my hips, guiding me as I shifted myself along his shaft. There was nothing like the feeling of him being inside of me, filling me completely.

Edward slid one of his hands from my hips up and cupped my breast as I rode him as hard as I could, letting him slid in and out of me. My head fell back as he rolled my already sensitive nipple between his fingers. He knew just how to manipulate my body and I fucking loved it. Edward moved his other hand down to my swollen nub, pressing down as he pinched my nipple. Pleasure shot through me as I came harder than I ever had.

"OH FUCK, EDWARD!" I screamed, riding out my orgasm. Edward brought his hands back down to my hips, grabbing them as he thrust up once more. I felt the warm tingle as he released his seed into me, grunting.

"Goddamn, Bella," he groaned as I fell forward, covering his body with mine. I was too weak to move, though. "That was…"

"Yeah, I know," I laughed. "I can't move. I'm too tired."

"I don't want you to move," he chuckled, wrapping his arms around me. "I like you right here."

"I love you," I smiled, looking up at him.

"I love you, too," he murmured, leaning forward and kissing me.

For several minutes, I laid on top of Edward, slowly kissing him. Letting my lips say what my body had, my heart screamed, what my mind couldn't find the right words to express just how much I loved him. How much I needed him. He would never understand how much he had helped me over the past few months. It went past the abuse he helped me deal with but to the strength he gave me to tell him when I didn't want something. To stand up for myself, to believe that I was worthy to be loved by someone like him and I finally did believe that. I was worthy of Edward and he was worthy of me.

"Baby, as much as I want to stay like this all day," murmured Edward, moving his lips to my throat. "We have to get ready for work."

"Don't want to," I muttered.

"I don't either but we have to," he whispered, sending a shiver through me again.

"Fine," I sighed, rolling off of him. I sat up on the side of the bed and looked back at him. He was staring at me like a man possessed. "Shower with me, love?"

Edward's eyes darkened the way they always did when I returned his term of endearment. "Yes," he growled.

Twenty minutes later, Edward and I emerged from the bathroom, physically cleaner but that was about the only way that we were clean. Neither of us had been able to keep our hands to ourselves and it was a wonder that we didn't end up having to take a cold shower but we didn't. Edward slipping on a pair of pajama pants and said that he was going to make me breakfast while I got ready for work. He was a wonderful man.

As I got ready for work, I thought about how much better I was feeling today than I did just two days ago. The medication that Charlotte had prescribed for me had helped me so much with the nausea that I almost felt normal again. At least, I might be able to enjoy my wedding that was now only three days away. I couldn't stop the smile that sprang up on my face as I slipped on my khaki pants. I had been so scared to take the chance and marry him but I knew now that I was ready. It had nothing to do with our baby, either. He or she was just an added bonus to our lives. I was ready to marry Edward and be able to tell the world that he was mine and only mine.

Once I was dressed and ready for work, I headed into the kitchen. Edward was just setting our bowls of oatmeal on the table when I came in. He looked up at me, giving me my favorite crooked smile and I started sobbing.

"Baby, what's wrong?" he asked, frantically as he rushed over and pulled me into his arms. I opened my mouth several times to speak but I couldn't seem to get any words out. "You're fucking scaring me, Bella. Are you hurt?"

I shook my head but still couldn't say anything. Edward pulled me over to one of the chair and sat down with me in his lap. I ducked my head into his neck and let my tears fall, freely. Honestly, I wasn't even sure why I was crying, just that I was. It took me several minutes but I managed to dry up my tears and I sat up, wiping the remains off my face.

"Baby, why were you crying?" he asked, placing his hand on my cheek.

"I don't know," I said, sniffing. "You were cooking for me… and…it was…so…sweet."

"Shh, love, don't start crying again," he said, soothingly as my eyes filled up with tears. "You knew I was making breakfast."

"I know," I muttered, sniffing again. "You take such good care of me, Edward. I love you so much."

"I love you, too," he whispered, smiling against the side of my head. "Now, eat."

"Ok," I smiled as I started to climb off his lap. He pulled me back down.

"Stay," he said, quickly.

I sat on Edward's lap and ate my oatmeal, all while he was caressing my lower back. It was perfect and I loved having him all to myself, even if it was only for a short time. Edward walked me out to my car and kissed me. He didn't seem to care that the mom from across the street was standing at her front window, ogling him. I can't say I blame her, though. He wasn't wearing a shirt after all.

"You had better get inside before Tessa," I gestured to the neighbor, "comes over and starts attacking you. I won't be able to save you."

"Ok, ok," he sighed, leaning into me again. "I'll see you later."

"Later," I murmured.

Edward kissed me once more before opening my car door for me. My face was ten shades of red as I climbed in. He muttered something about me teasing him as he shut the door behind me. I wasn't sure what in the hell he was talking about. If anyone was the tease, it was him. He was the one standing in the front yard, half naked and looking utterly delicious. My face heated up even more as I started my car, pulled on my seatbelt, and headed to the school. I had to stop thinking of him like that or it was going to be a long ass day.

A few minutes later, I pulled my car into my usual parking spot and headed into the school. I walked into my library and found Angela Weber sitting at one of the small tables. She was looking around at all my books with a smile on her face. I just didn't understand why she was here in my library in the middle of the week.

"Angela?" I asked. She looked over at me and smiled bigger.

"Hey, Bella," she said, standing up. "I love what you have done with the library."

"Um, thanks," I muttered, moving behind my counter and placing my purse in my desk. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to talk to you," she said, still smiling. She moved over and leaned against the counter. "How's everything going?"

"Good," I said, slowly. "Edward and I are getting married this weekend."

"Oh, I heard," she laughed. "Ben told me to tell you both congratulations."

"Thanks," I said, smiling. "Did you come all the way from Dallas just to congratulate me on my upcoming wedding?"

"No," she said, shaking her head. "It was just a coincidence really."

"Ah," I said, nodding my head. "Well, are you going to tell me why you are here?"

"Can't a woman just come visit her one of her oldest and dearest friends without having an ulterior motive?" she asked.

"Not you," I said, dryly. "Out with it, Angela."

"Ok, ok," she sighed, putting her hands up. "I want to publish you."

"Excuse me?" I asked. "What in the world are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about me taking your book and publishing it so the whole country can see how amazing you are." Angela stood there in front of me, smiling.

"What?" I asked.

"You know, for someone who got a degree from Duke University you are incredibly dense," she scoffed.

"Angela, what in the hell are you talking about?" I demanded. "How'd you know about my book? You don't even know if it is any good."

"Yes, I do," sang Angela. "Edward sent me a piece." I clenched my jaw together as rage surged through me and Angela's eyes went wide. "Bella-"

"AHH!" I screamed, slamming my fist down on the table.

Angela took a couple of steps back as her mouth fell wide open, matching her dark eyes. I dug through my purse and pulled out my cell phone. How dare he send her or anyone any part of my book? I wasn't ready for anyone but him to see it, to know about it. It was still too fresh, too personal to me. I trusted him with so much and he had betrayed that. I felt ashamed and humiliated. I quickly dialed the house, knowing that he would still be there. The phone only rang twice before he picked it up.

"Hello, love," he said. "Did-"

"You have some nerve, Edward Cullen." I was so mad that I was shaking.

"Bella, what-"

"How dare you send Angela a part of my book?" I snapped. "I wasn't ready for that to happen and you had no right to betray me like that."

"I'm sorry, I was just trying to help," he muttered.

"Help?" I yelled, gripping the phone. "You humiliated me, Edward!"

"Bella," he whispered. "I…"

"Yeah, I know," I snarled. "Just don't bother helping me anymore."

I closed my phone and threw it on the table. I looked over at Angela, who looked like she wasn't sure she should even breathe, much less move. "Get out of my library!"

"Bella-"

"NOW!" I screamed. "GET OUT!"

Angela scrambled out of my library and I slid to the floor behind my desk, sobbing uncontrollably. Why wouldn't he ask me before he sent something off to her? He knew how hard it was for me write about everything that Mike had done to me. There were times that I was so overcome by my feelings that he had to hold to me for hours, reassuring me that everything was ok. How could he think it was ok for him to share that with anyone?

"Bella, do you…" Garrett trailed off as he spotted me on the floor. He rushed over and knelt down next to me. "Bella, are you ok?"

"I'm fine," I muttered, darkly as I pushed him away from me. "Just leave me alone."

"I was just trying to help," he mumbled, standing up.

"I didn't ask for your help," I snapped as I stood in front of him.

"Well, maybe help comes to you, regardless on if you want it to or not," he said, heatedly. "You know, I get that you have a lot of crap in your past but, Bella, you are letting it dictate who you are instead of deciding for yourself."

"Tell me, Garrett, what's it like to never have to be afraid of making the wrong decision?" I asked, shortly.

"I wouldn't know," he snapped, running his hand through his hair. "You think you're the only one who has ever suffered, Bella? You're not. Plenty of the rest of us have, too."

"I'm so sure," I muttered. Garrett chuckled, darkly.

"You have a whole lot of people that love you, Bella," he said. "Stop throwing yourself a pity party and let them love you."

"It's that easy?" I asked.

"No," he muttered, shaking his head. "It took me years to move on."

"You?" I asked. He nodded his head, quickly.

"Let's just say that I didn't have a dad like Charlie, or from what Kate tells me, a wonderful mom like you had," said Garrett.

"Garrett," I whispered.

"I know," he said. "I don't need your pity either."

I was fixing to tell him that I didn't pity him when the door to my library opened. I looked back and saw Edward standing there, looking pissed off. Garrett cleared his throat and walked out of my library. Edward reached behind him and pulled the door shut. For a moment, we just stood there staring at each other. I wasn't sure what to say to him. Honestly, I was so angry with him for sending Angela anything without talking to me but I didn't want to lose him over it, either.

"Bella," he sighed, shaking his head. It was then that I realized he wasn't angry with me, but with himself. He was just as scared of losing me as I was of losing him. "I'm so sorry that I did that. I just wanted to help but I guess I screwed everything up."

"I just wished you would have talked to me before you sent her anything from my book," I said, wrapping my arms around my torso. "Edward, you betrayed my trust."

"I know and I am so sorry," he whispered, thickly. "Baby, you are an amazing writer and I want you to have everything you ever dreamed of having."

"But you have to let me do this at my pace, Edward," I said. "I wasn't ready for anyone else to know."

"I didn't send her anything about…him," said Edward. "I sent her a part about your mom."

"Thank you for that but you still should have talked to me about it before you sent her anything," I murmured, moving over and slipping my arms around him. "Baby, I love you and that will never change but you have to let me decide when I am ready to share my writing with anyone, ok?"

"I promise to never do it again," he whispered, pressing his lips down on mine. "I really am sorry."

"I'm sorry I yelled at you on the phone," I said. "It's just that Angela was here and…"

"What did she want?" he asked.

"She said she wants to publish my book," I muttered, leaning my forehead down onto his chest. "Edward, the thought of people rejecting my book…"I trailed off as I shook my head. "I don't know if I could handle that."

"We could handle it together," he said. "I really am sorry."

"I know," I sighed, looking up at him. "Me too."

"I've got to get to class," he frowned. "Are we ok?"

"Yeah, we're ok," I smiled. "I'll see you later. Don't forget I have to go to Alice's shop and talk wedding dresses."

"Yay, you," he cheered, quietly. "I love you."

"I love you, too."


	39. Chapter 39

Thirty-nine

The rest of the day flew by and before I knew it, the final bell of the day was ringing. I'm not entirely sure how I managed to get through the day at all, though. All day, I thought about Angela's offer to publish my book. Was it really good enough to publish? Would people really be interested in my life story? Was I ready for everyone to know everything I had been through? I wasn't so sure. It was one thing to get my story out on paper, so to speak, because I needed to get it out and it something completely different to put myself out there for everyone to see. How would I know when the time was right to make such a difficult decision?

My head was killing me as I shut the door to my library and locked it behind me. Kids were rushing around me as I made my way through the halls. The smaller of the kids, mostly kindergarteners and first graders, would stop and hug me on their way out to the buses or to where their moms or dads were waiting for them. Garrett was standing outside his office, biding the students heading out of the front of the school a good day as they walked by. He looked up at me as I came up to him.

"Garrett," I murmured, shaking my head.

"I know," he said, quietly. "Just know, Bella, that you aren't alone. It's hard to let it all go, I get that, but you can't live in the past anymore. Whatever you went through, made you the strong, beautiful woman that you are now."

"You really think so?" I asked, looking up at him.

"Yes, I do," he smiled. "Look at how much more confidence you have now, compared to who you were just a couple of months ago. Bella, you are not weak."

"Thank you," I murmured. "Sometimes, I need to be reminded of that, I guess."

"That's what I am here for," he chuckled. I rolled my eyes and looked over at the doors.

"I have to go. Alice is waiting," I sighed. "It's dress day."

"Have fun," he smirked.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," I muttered.

As I walked through the front doors of the school, I could still hear Garrett laughing at me. If we weren't surrounded by young impressionable children I would have flipped him off and probably called him a horses ass, or something similar, but I didn't. Instead, I climbed into my car and headed down to Alice's shop to find me the perfect wedding dress. I honestly would have preferred to wear a pair of jeans and a t-shirt but I knew there were just some things that you do not argue with Alice about, ever, and this wedding dress was one of them.

When I walked into Alice's shop, I was surprised to see Angela standing with Alice and Esme. She was laughing as she looked over at me. She stopped laughing and frowned. Guilt washed over me as I thought about how I treated her this morning. She didn't ask for me to be raging, hormonal bitch but I had been. Alice and Esme were looking between the two of us, like they weren't sure why Angela had suddenly stopped laughing or why she was so rigid that if she fell backwards, she would fall like a surf board.

"I should probably go," muttered Angela, looking back at Alice and Esme. "It was nice seeing you both."

Angela turned and bustled past me, leaving both Alice and Esme standing there with their mouths open. I closed my eyes as I turned and followed her out. "Angela, wait," I said. She stopped and turned back to me. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have reacted like I did."

"You know, most people are thrilled when I tell them that I want to publish their books," she murmured, shaking her head. "This is the first time I've had someone scream at me to get out."

"I'm sorry," I said, again. "You don't understand, though. There are things in the book that I am not sure I wanted anyone to know yet."

"That's all you had to say," she said, softly. "I would never push you to do anything you weren't ready for, Bella, but I'm going to be honest with you. Your book is too good to be sitting on your computer because you are scared to let anyone in."

"It's not that easy," I sighed.

"I know it's not," she said. "I know what he did to you, Bella."

I looked away from her. "Who told you?" I asked.

"No one, we could just tell," she sighed. I closed my eyes and looked at the ground. "After the way you reacted when Ben and I saw you at the square in July, both Ben and I knew something was wrong. Ben works with…well, people in situations like you were in, Bella. He recognized the signs."

"I might as well have had it written on my fucking forehead," I muttered.

"He knew what to look for, Bella, that's all," she said, quickly. I took a deep breath as I looked up at her. "We never said anything to anyone, if that is what you are afraid of."

"I'm sure most people in this town know by now anyway." I folded my arms in front of me. "It's not something I talk about, though. My book is…well, it's kind of like my therapy."

"Bella, I am not asking you to decide now," smiled Angela, stepping up to me and placing her hand on my shoulder. "I'm asking you to think about it. Bella, honey, you are too good of a writer to let your talent go to waste because you are scared. Your mom wouldn't want to you to hide behind your writing."

"That's not fair bringing my mom into this," I muttered. Angela smiled.

"I know, I cheat," she smirked. I rolled my eyes and looked up at her. "Just think about it, ok? I'll be there whenever you are ready."

"If I'm never ready?" I asked.

"You will be," she said, smiling. "One day, you will be ready to share your story with the world and I will be there ready to help you do so. Don't be too pissed with Edward, either. That boy is so head over heels in love with you."

"I know he is," I blushed, causing Angela to laugh. "Shut up."

"God, I've missed you, Bells," she sighed. "I'm so happy for you and Edward. Ben and I wish we could be here for you this weekend, but we can't."

"Thank you, Ang," I murmured, blinking back my tears. "Tell Ben I said hello, ok?"

"I will," she promised, wrapping her arms around me. "You look beautiful, honey. You look happy."

"I am happy," I wept, softly.

"Good," she whispered, pulling back. "I've gotta go. My flight from Amarillo leaves in an a couple of hours."

"Be careful."

I watched as Angela climbed into her rental car and pulled away from Alice's shop. In all the years that I was gone, I had missed her so much. Angela and I bonded over our love of books and literature. Where Alice was my go to girl when it came to make-up, clothes, and nearly everything else, Angela was the one who understood what it felt like to get so lost in a book that before you realized it, the entire day was gone and you had done nothing but live in a world of make believe. Maybe that is why I was having trouble with the thought of publishing my book, it wasn't a world of make believe to me. It was very real and still very painful. Would I ever really be able to let it go? Was it always going to haunt me?

"Bella, sweetheart, are you ok?"

I turned back and saw Esme standing in the doorway to Alice's small shop. She had a frown on her face and her eyes were full of worry. "I'm fine," I said, wiping the drying tears off my face as I headed over to her. "Just tired."

"Oh," she murmured, sliding her arm around my shoulder and leaning down to my ear. "It's get better as you get further along."

I looked up at her, fear etched on my face. Did she know that Edward and I were having a baby? Could she know? She just smiled and looked back over at Alice, who looked confused on Angela's sudden and dramatic retreat from her shop.

"What the hell was that about?" huffed Alice, placing her hands on her hips. I wanted to roll my eyes and tell her to stop being a drama queen but this was Alice we were talking about.

"Alice, stop being a drama queen," sighed Esme. I bit my lip and looked away as she spoke my thoughts for me. However, Alice just waved her mother off as she came around her counter.

"Whatever," she said, locking the door and looping her arm in with mine and started pulling me to the back of the shop. "I have six dresses for you to try on."

"Six?" I whined, dragging my feet. "That's going to take forever."

"No, it won't," scoffed Alice.

I didn't say anything else as Alice manhandled me into the back with Esme following us. Even she knew better than to try to get between her daughter and a wedding dress. There are just something you don't do, and that is one. We all knew it and respected it. Alice let go of my arm and pulled the cover off of the rack of dresses.

"No way in hell am I wearing that one," I screeched, gesturing to a white dress with feathers all over it. Alice turned and looked at me.

"It would look good on you," she said, pointedly. I narrowed my eyes at her as I crossed my arms in front of me.

"No," I said, firmly. "I will not be wearing a dress with fucking feathers on it, Mary Alice Whitlock. That is final."

"Fine," she muttered, turning back to the rack. She pulled off the second dress and shoved it into my arms. "Try this one on."

I took the dress from her and headed into the dressing room, locking the door behind me. I hung the dress up on the hook behind the door and just stared at it. There was no way I was going to be able to pull off this dress. It was a A-line, ivory dress that was going to make my hips look huge and my breasts look like they were pouring out of the dress. I really didn't want to flash anyone on my wedding day.

"Alice-"

"Bella, try it on," she ordered.

I started stripping off my clothes, taking my time to fold them and place them on the small stool in the corner, and pull on the wedding dress. Just as I knew it would, it was too tight around my hips and too small around my bust line. Of course, the later might have to do with the fact that my boobs have gotten enormous since I got pregnant, much to Edward's delight. A blush crept up on my cheeks as I thought about the way he worshiped my body just this morning. He always made me feel so good.

"Bella, what is taking so long?" whined Alice. I muttered a few four letters words under my breath as I pushed open the door to the dressing room. Alice's face twisted into one of utter disgust. "Ew, no. Try this one."

"I told you," I muttered, ripping the next dress out of her hands.

"Yeah, yeah," she said, waving me off.

The next dress wasn't as bad as the first one. This one was a strapless dress that actually made my boobs look really good. The only problem was it was several inches too long and we didn't have time to get it altered before the wedding. I could see the gears in Alice's head turning as she thought that this might be the thing that convinced me to push the wedding back and let her throw me the wedding she felt Edward and I needed, but I put a stop to that thinking right away.

"Alice, I know what is going through that pretty little head of yours and you might as well give up now." I placed my hands in my hips and stared at her. "Edward and I are getting married on Saturday, end of fucking story."

"Fine," she muttered, plopping down on the small leather sofa. "Go try on the next dress."

I headed into the dressing room again and stripped off the dress I was wearing. It really was a beautiful wedding dress but I'm not sure I would have picked it for myself even if Edward and I weren't getting married so soon. It just didn't feel like the right dress to me. Neither did the next two, as well.

The next one I tried on was just plain awful. It had huge, puffy sleeves and a stiff collar. The bodice of the dress was covered in hundreds of little beads and I wasn't sure why in the hell Alice thought this would be one that I would actually like to wear. I think the pixie had gone a little insane. The one after that was better but not by much. It didn't have the puffy sleeves or the collar but it still had all the beads. This one was tapered in the waist and flowed out, making my hips look even worse than the first one I tried on did.

"Alice, this one isn't right, either," I whined, pushing the door to the dressing room open again. She and Esme looked over at me and cringed. "Gee, that's comforting."

"Sorry but that's just plain awful," grimaced Esme, standing up. She pulled off the last dress on the rack and brought it over to me. "Try this one."

"What if this one is wrong too?" I asked, sniffing back the tears I felt building.

"Then we will have to go in search of something tomorrow, won't we," she smiled, patting my face in a motherly way. "Go try it on, dear."

"Ok," I whispered.

I turned and headed back into the dressing room for the fifth time. The headache that I had had all day long was raging through my head and all I really wanted to do was curl up in bed and go to sleep. I carefully pulled off the horrible dress and hung it back up in the hanger and added to the rest of the dresses that just weren't right. I turned to the next dress and unzipped the plastic dress bag. My breath caught in my chest when I saw the dress that was hanging on the padded hanger.

It was a simple ivory strapless dress that flared out from under my bust line and hit just above my knees. I gently pulled the dress of the hanger and slipped it on. The sift satin grazed my skin, making me feel so beautiful. I pushed open the door to the dressing room as my eyes filled with tears once again today. I was really turning into quite the hormonal mess.

Both Alice and Esme gasped as they stood up bringing their hands up to their mouths in a way that was eerily similar to each other. They walked around me, neither of them uttering a sound. I was starting to feel like a bit of a freak as they circled me. Maybe I was wrong about this dress but it felt right. I was fixing to say something when Alice smiled.

"It's perfect," she murmured, eyes filling up with tears. "Just absolutely perfect."

I let out the breath I had been holding. "Oh, thank god," I sighed, contently. I looked over at Esme, who was blinking furiously. "Esme?"

"Oh, Bella, Renee would have loved to see you in that dress right now," she whimpered.

"You think so?" I asked.

Esme nodded as she wiped the tears away. "Yes, sweetheart, she would be so proud of you."

As I turned and looked at myself in the large mirror, I could feel the tears building gin my eyes again. I really hoped that Esme was right about my mother. Even with her being gone for twenty years, I still felt the need to make her proud of me. I'm sure that feeling would always be with me. I turned back and looked at Alice, who was smiling from behind her hands.

"Thanks, Ali," I whispered.

"Anything for my sister," she cried.

I headed back into the dressing room and changed out of my wedding dress. I pulled on my pants and shirt. I carefully hung my dress back on the hanger and zipped it up inside of the dress bag. Alice took it from me as soon as I had the door to the dressing room open. She assured me that she would take care of it for me until it was time for me to put it on Saturday evening. I hugged her and thanked her again for everything before I headed back out to my car.

When I got back home, I found Edward standing in the kitchen. He was making us dinner and shaking his hips to the music pouring out of the small radio that sat on the corner. I went over and wrapped my arms around his waist, feeling him sigh.

"Did she run you ragged?" he asked. I laid my head on his back, closing my eyes.

"No," I murmured. "How was school?"

"Boring," he said. "How was your school?"

"Long," I smiled. "I talked to Angela."

Edward tensed up a little. "And?"

"I'm going to think about publishing my book," I whispered. "I'm scared to death but I don't know. Maybe I need to do this in order to really be free. Does that make sense?"

"Yes," he murmured, turning in my arms. He wrapped his arms around my body, pulling me close. "You are free, Bella."

"Have I told you that I love you?" I asked.

"A few times," he chuckled. "Have I told you that I am the luckiest man in the world because I get to love you?"

"A few hundred times," I smiled as I looked up at him. "Only three more days."

"Three more days," he murmured, leaning down and capturing my lips with his.


	40. Chapter 40

Forty

Early Saturday morning, I climbed out of the bed in Edward's old bedroom at Carlisle and Esme's house. Alice had insisted that I had to spend the night at their house, with her and Rose. She said it was our last slumber party. I would have rather stayed at mine and Edward's house, with him, but two things stopped me. First, Alice had that look. The look that clearly said she wasn't going to let me out of it and I knew better than to fight her. Second, Rose looked scared to death to spend the night with Alice alone. They were getting along much better now but it was still tense with Alice, who was struggling to control her jealousy over mine and Rose's friendship. She would never say anything to me or Rose but it still bothered Alice that I could talk to Rose about everything. We were a work in progress, I suppose you would say.

However, I couldn't sleep in Alice's old room with her and Rose. I missed Edward and needed to be closer to him. So I went down to his old bedroom and tried to sleep in his old bed but I couldn't even sleep in that bed without him. I needed him next to me, holding me, loving me all night long. He was my rock, my life and I would never stop needing his arms around me.

I quietly made my way downstairs and pulled the blanket off the back of the couch before I settled on the small window seat in front of the picture window in the living room. I pulled my knees up to my chest, wrapped the blanket around myself, and looked out the window. The sun was just starting to rise over the eastern plains, turning the sky orange. It had always been Renee's favorite part of the day. She told me once that daybreak was like getting a second chance to live life to the fullest.

"Hey, you're up early," said Charlie. I looked over at him as he stepped off the bottom stair. "Everything ok?"

"Yeah," I said, quietly. "I couldn't sleep so I thought I might as well get up."

"Nervous or excited?" he asked, moving over and sitting down across from me. He reached out and pulled my feet into his lap, rubbing them.

"Both," I murmured, feeling my eyes fill up with tears. "God, I am so tired of crying all the time."

"Your mom was really emotional when she was pregnant with you, too," he said, softly. "She would cry at commercials on TV or we would be at the store and they would be out of whatever brand of ice cream she wanted and she would burst into tears," he chuckled, blinking several times. Charlie took a deep, ragged breath. "I haven't thought about that in a long time."

"What would you do for her?" I asked.

Charlie smiled. "I would load her up in the car and drive to Amarillo and stop at Baskin Robins and buy her the biggest, messiest ice cream sundae they had," he laughed. I smiled and shook my head. "Always made her feel better."

"When you and Mom got married, were you nervous?" I asked. Charlie sighed as he looked out the window.

"Not nervous about marrying her, Bella. Renee…Shit, that woman owned me from the moment I saw her sitting in that library," he said, laughing softly. "I was more nervous about not being a good enough husband to her. She deserved the best and I don't think I lived up to it."

"You did," I said, quietly. Charlie looked over at me. "You were a good husband, Dad. Mom loved…you…so…much," I cried. I took a deep breath. "What if I'm not a good wife to Edward?"

"You will be," he said, simply. "Edward doesn't expect perfection, Bella. All that man wants is you. Just you."

"Daddy, I love him so much," I sobbed. "It's so overwhelming sometimes and I get so scared that I am going to lose him like I lost Mommy."

"Honey, I wish I could promise you that nothing would ever happen to Edward," said Charlie, reaching over and grabbing my hand, "but I can't. I've been there and I pray that you never feel that pain. You have to make sure that you tell him everyday that you love him. You tell him everyday that you are thankful for him."

"I do," I whimpered.

"That's all you can do, Honey," he said, sadly.

"Do you think Mom is here with us?" I asked.

Charlie nodded his head as he let a tear travel down his face. "I know she is," he whispered. "I can feel her."

"Dad, thank you for letting me come home," I murmured. "I know I made things hard when I came back but I…I love you so much, Daddy."

"I love you, too, Honey," he cried, softly. "You are always welcome at my house, ok? Anytime."

"I know that now," I whispered.

"Alice is going to kill me," chuckled Charlie, wiping his tears off his face.

"Why?" I asked.

"Cause I made you cry on your wedding day," he smiled. I laughed as I moved over and hugged him.

"I'll protect you from the pixie's wrath, Dad," I giggled.

"Oh, thank god!" he sighed, clearly relieved. Charlie stood up, pulling me up with him. "Come on, I'll let you make me some breakfast."

"Gee, Dad, you are so kind," I snorted following him into the kitchen.

"I know," he said, nodding his head. "That's what dad's are for, though."

I couldn't argue with the man so I pushed him onto one of the bar stools and moved over to the refrigerator to figure out what to make my father for breakfast. I ultimately decided on French toast so I pulled out everything I was going to need and started making him some breakfast. I had just pulled the last piece off the stove when Alice, Rose, and Esme came into the kitchen. All three of them were wearing their pajamas and robes, but had already been in the shower, based on how wet their hair was.

"Charlie, are you making her cook for you on her wedding day?" scolded Alice, placing her hands on her hips.

"Yep," smirked Charlie as I placed his plate in front of him. He looked up and winked at me. "Thanks, honey."

"You're welcome, Daddy," I smiled, taking the seat next to him with my own plate of French toast. However, before I could take my first bite, the plate and fork were pulled from me. I snapped my head up and saw Alice holding them back. I stood up, causing both Esme and Charlie to suck in a deep breath.

"Now, Bella-"

"Give me back my food," I hissed, reaching for it. Alice, however, thought it would be a good idea to pull the plate away from me.

"Alice, you don't want to-"

"Bella, the last thing you need is a big breakfast today," said Alice, interrupting her mother.

"Stupid move," muttered Esme, under her breath. I balled my hands into fists as I tried not to hit her.

"Alice, give me back my fucking breakfast," I snapped.

"Bella-"

"NOW!" I screamed. Alice nearly threw the plate of French toast back onto the counter next to Charlie. "Fork, too." She placed the fork next to the plate and I turned and sat back down. I picked up the fork and took my first bite, moaning at how good it tasted. "This is damn good," I muttered, mouth full of food.

"Wow," murmured Alice. I looked back over at her as I swallowed the food in my mouth. "If I didn't know better, I would swear you were knocked up, Bella." I just sat there staring at her as the color left my face. She threw her hands up to her mouth as she gasped. "Are you?" she whispered. "Are you pregnant?"

"Yes," I whispered, setting my fork down. Charlie placed his hand on my back, rubbing gently as if to tell me that everything was ok. "Alice-"

"Why didn't you tell us?" she demanded, even though she was smiling.

"Edward and I wanted to wait until I was further along, in case I lost the baby," I murmured, looking down at my hands. "I'm sorry-"

I was cut off when I felt her throw her tiny arms around me, pulling me off the stool as we both fell to the floor. Her tiny body was shaking as she cried, which of course set off my own tears. Honestly, I wasn't sure why we were crying, just that we were. Alice pulled back and she brought her tiny hands up to my face, cupping my cheeks. Her lip was trembling and she still had tears pouring from her eyes.

"Bella, I'm so…fucking happy…for you and Edward," she cried, hiccupping.

"You're not mad at me?" I asked, sniffing back my tears.

"No," she sobbed. "I wish you had told me but I understand why you didn't. Oh, Bella, you're going to be a mommy."

"What?" asked Carlisle.

I slowly turned back and looked at my soon to be father-in-law. He was standing in the doorway to the kitchen with a look of pure shock on his face. I stood up and opened my mouth to say something but couldn't get anything out. He stepped over to me, slowly raising his hand to my cheek.

"Sweetheart, you're pregnant?" he asked.

"Yes," I whispered, looking down at the ground. Carlisle lifted my chin up so he could look in my eyes. He had tears swimming in his blue eyes. He blinked quickly, causing one of them to float down his face. "Carlisle."

"No, it's Grandpa," he whispered, pulling me in for a hug. "I'm so happy for you and Edward, Bella."

"Thank you," I cried. He pulled back and wiped the tears off both of our faces.

"Well, you should probably finish eating so you can go marry that boy of mine," chuckled Carlisle.

I nodded my head as I turned back to my food. It was then that I realized that Rose had left the room. Looking over at Charlie, who seemed to just noticed the same time, I shuffled out of the room. Rose wasn't in the living room but the front door was open. I went out and found her sitting on the porch swing, knees pulled up to her chest and tears pouring down her face.

"Rose?" I asked. She looked over at me, frowning. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she said, quickly, turning away. "I just thought you might need some time with your family."

"You're part of my family, too, Rose," I said, moving over and sitting down next to her. I reached out and placed my hand on top of hers. "You're my sister."

"I am?" she asked.

"Of course you are," I smiled. "When you marry Emmett, it will be official. You, me, and Ali."

"Alice doesn't like me," she frowned.

"Yes, I do," said Alice. Rose and I looked over and saw her standing in the doorway. "I'm jealous as hell of your connection to each other, Rose, but I like you."

"I wish that Bella and I weren't connected like that, Alice," frowned Rose, shaking her head.

"Me too," murmured Alice, moving over and sitting on my lap.

"Ugh," I groaned, swatting her ass but she ignored me.

"Rose, you make Emmett happy," smiled Alice. "He's been alone for a long time, and even though I gave him a lot of shit about not settling down, I loved that he wasn't willing to settle for just anyone. He's been waiting for you for so long."

"I love him, Alice," cried Rose. "He makes me feel…"

"Like you're his everything," Alice whispered. Rose nodded her head, softly. "Jasper makes me feel like that."

"So does Edward," I murmured, laying my head on Alice's shoulder. Alice reached out and placed her hand on top of mine and Rose's.

"Aren't we lucky?" she giggled. "Three amazing men who love us."

"Even when we are hormonal and pregnant," I snickered.

"Or PMSing," laughed Rose.

"Exactly," smiled Alice. "What would we do without them?"

"I hope we never find out," I murmured.

Alice, Rose, and I headed inside the house and to the kitchen. Esme pulled my cold French toast away and set a plate with hot French toast there instead. I smiled as I took my first bit, savoring the deliciousness. Carlisle and Charlie both hugged me before they headed upstairs to get their showers out of the way and head over to the Methodist church for the wedding. I finished eating and headed upstairs to take my own shower.

As I stood under the hot water, letting it wash away the nerves that were already building, on top of the nerves that were already there, I thought about how much my life had changed since I came here in May. I had been lost and angry. My life had been falling apart for years and I didn't know what I wanted, who I was, or what I was supposed to do now. But in a single moment, out by the lake, I found just who I needed. Edward was the one person who never pushed me to do more than I was able to. He believed that I was worth it, even when I didn't, and he loved me, even when I didn't love myself. I was the luckiest woman in the world for getting to spend the rest of my life with him, my lover and my soul mate.

I finished my shower and dried off. Slipping on the pink, silk robe that Alice had given me, I stepped out of the bathroom. Alice, Rose, and Esme spent the rest of morning, and most of the afternoon, pampering me. Normally, I would be bothered by them touching me so much but today, I was going to let them because they needed to this for me just as much as I needed them to pamper me.

We giggled and told stories about our men. Esme made us all blush when she talked about how Carlisle had taken her on a hayride to proposed to her. She said they ended up making love that night. Alice pretended to gag but I could tell that she loved how much her parents loved each other. Rose was very quiet but I knew it was just because she wasn't used to having women around her that loved her like this. We would have to make sure she knew that we did love her.

After they had painted my nails, fixed my hair, and applied my make-up, they headed off to their rooms to get their dresses on. I slipped off my robe and pulling on the white lace hipsters and matching strapless bra that Alice had bought for me. I was thankful that she hadn't bought me a thong. The last thing I wanted was a pair of underwear up my ass while I was marrying Edward.

I was just unzipping my dress when the door opened behind me. I looked back to see Esme coming in, wearing a pale yellow dress that reached her knees. It was Renee's favorite color and I had a feeling that she was wearing it in honor of my mother. She smiled as she came over and placed her hands on my bare shoulders.

"Ready to put your dress on?" she asked.

"More than ready," I murmured.

Esme reached past me and pulled the zipper on my dress bag the rest of the way down. She slipped my dress off the hanger and handed it over to me. I carefully slipped the dress on, trying my hardest not to rip it or something. I turned and Esme zipped up the dress. I slipped on the matching heels and looked back at Esme. She placed her hands on my shoulders as we turned and looked in the floor length mirror that hung on the back of the bathroom door.

My breath caught as I looked at the woman who was standing in the mirror with Esme. She looked happy, healthy. Her cheeks were rosy and her skin was creamy looking. She had bright eyes and soft pink lips that glistened under the lip-gloss she wore. Her hair had been pulled up on the back of her head in an elegant French twist but there were a few pieces handing loose, framing her face. The biggest change in the woman I saw in the mirror today and the woman I had seen in the mirror four months ago, was that this woman smiled.

Esme held up a gold locket that hung on a gold chain. She opened the locket and showed me the pictures inside of it. On the right side of the locket was a picture of me and Renee. I was newborn and she was holding me up to her chest, kissing the top of my bald little head. On the other side of the locket was a picture of me and Edward from when we were little. I was around four and he had to have been around six. We were laying on the couch in her living room, fast asleep. Edward had his arm around my waist and I was laying my head under his chin.

"Renee took this picture one day after she took all of you to the park. Alice and Emmett had ran out into the backyard to play but you and Edward climbed onto the couch and fell asleep. When Renee walked in, she found you like this. She took the picture and said that one day, you would see it," murmured Esme, hanging the locket around my neck. "She was right."

"She always was," I whispered, bringing my fingers up and placing them on top of the locket. "Esme, thank you."

"You're welcome," smiled Esme, kissing my shoulder. "It's what Mom's do."

"Oh, Bella," gasped Rose, coming in with Alice. "You look beautiful."

"Thank you," I smiled. "You two look…amazing."

Rose was wearing a orchard colored wrap dress that hugged her curves. Matched with a pair of black pumps, which made her legs look twice as long, she looked like she could have just stepped off the cover of Vanity Fair. Her blond hair had been straightened so that it hung down her back. Emmett was going to have a difficult time keeping his hands off of her. Alice was wearing a silver silk dress that clung to her tiny body. She had on a pair of matching silver strappy heels. Her dark hair had been pulled up into a messy twist, causing her to look five years younger.

"We'll do," shrugged Alice, coming over to me. She placed her hand on my shoulder. "Are you ready?"

"More than ready," I whispered.

Taking a deep breath, I followed Rose, Alice, and Esme downstairs and out to Esme's car. I climbed into the front seat while Rose and Alice climbed into the back. Esme started her car, pulled out of the driveway, and headed down to the church. She pulled up in front of the old building a few minutes later. The Methodist church was the oldest church in the Texas Panhandle. The four of us climbed out of the car and headed inside the side door, where Charlie was waiting for us in a black suit.

"Oh, wow," he said, smiling when he saw me. "Honey, you look…beautiful."

"Thank you," I murmured.

"Well, we had better get inside and take our seats," smiled Esme. She leaned in and kissed my cheek. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

Rose and Alice followed Esme inside the sanctuary. Charlie wrapped my arm around his, gripping my hand tightly in my hand as he handed me my bouquet that consisted of three sunflowers. Charlie and I headed into the back of the sanctuary as the music started playing. The moment I stepped out of the shadows, I could feel Edward's eyes on me. I looked up and found myself lost in his brilliant green eyes. He smiled and I felt my entire body, flush red.

"You ready?" asked Charlie, looking down at me.

"I've never been more ready for anything in my entire life," I murmured, keeping my eyes locked on Edward's.

Charlie tightened his grip on my hand as we made our way down the aisle to Edward. Carlisle was standing next to Esme, arm wrapped around her waist. Emmett had both his arms around Rose, who was already wiping the tears from her eyes. Jasper and Alice were sitting on my side of the aisle, hands woven together and smiled on both of their faces. Behind them were Garrett and Kate, Lauren and Tyler. It touched my heart that they would be here for us today.

Charlie leaned in and kissed my cheek as he placed my hand in Edward's. He reached out and shook Edward's hand before moving over and standing next Alice. Edward and I turned to face Reverend Weber, Angela's fathers. Just as he was fixing to speak the door to the back of the church flew open. We looked back and saw a short woman, dark curly hair, came running in. She was gasping for air as she looked down at me and Edward.

"Edward, don't!" she yelled. "You can't marry her."

I looked back at Edward, who looked furious. "Who is that?" I asked.

"Jessica."


	41. Chapter 41

Forty-one

**EPOV**

I was so fucking nervous. I had no idea why I was so fucking nervous but I sure as hell was. Here I was in the groom's room in the back of the fucking church. I mean, the church, pacing back and forth and waiting to marry the woman I had been in love with for longer than I even realized I had been in love with her. Emmett and Jasper were sitting next to the wall, balancing their chairs on the hind legs, and watching as I paced back and forth. What if she didn't show up?

"She's going to show," laughed Emmett. I stopped pacing and looked back over at him.

"Did I ask that out loud?" Jasper and Emmett both laughed, falling forward so that their chairs had all four legs back on the ground.

"Yes, you did, Edward," chuckled Jasper. "Dude, there is no way in hell Bella is not coming tonight. She's so in love with you. Plus, Ali would probably kill her."

"True," I muttered, turning back to my pacing again.

The door to the room opened and Carlisle and Charlie came in, laughing to each other. My father came over and hugged me, hard. I slowly brought my arms up as I looked over at Emmett. He shrugged his shoulders and motioned that maybe Carlisle had been drinking. Of course, Charlie saw him and burst out laughing. Carlisle pulled away from me and looked over at him.

"Care to share what is so funny, Charlie?" asked Carlisle.

"Emmett thinks you're drunk off your ass cause you are hugging your boy," laughed Charlie, leaning against the wall behind him. "Oh, shit, that's funny."

"I am not drunk, Emmett Cullen," snorted my father, shaking his head. He looked back at me. "Bella shared some rather incredible news with us this morning."

"She did?" I asked, smiling.

"Yeah, there was a thing with Alice taking her food," said Carlisle. I winced.

"She didn't hurt Alice, did she?" I asked.

"Why would Bella hurt Alice?" asked Jasper, standing up. Emmett's brow was creased as he looked between us all.

"Well, normally, it's not a good idea to get between a pregnant woman and her food," I murmured. Emmett's mouth dropped open and Jasper's eyes flew wide. "Guys-"

"Bella's with child?" asked Emmett, standing up.

"Yes," I said, smiling. "We wanted to wait until she was further along before we told you, just in case something happened."

"You got Bella pregnant and now you are marrying her?" asked Jasper, nodding his head.

"Yes," I said.

"Please tell me that is not the only reason you are marrying her," he gritted out, teeth clenched tight. "Cause, goddamn it, Edward, she deserve better than that shit."

"Man, how can you even ask me that?" I snapped. "I fucking love her and I've wanted to marry her for months!"

"Ok, ok, I was just asking," muttered Jasper, putting his hands up.

"Sorry," I said, quietly. "I had to wait until she was ready. She's been through the asshole who forced her into too much and I am not about to do that to her. She was really freaked out about the baby, thinking I was going to hate her. I could never hate her, I love her so fucking much."

"Good," said Charlie. I looked over at him. "Because my baby girl, deserves that, Edward. She's terrified of somehow failing you and I know, in my heart I know, that you are going to take care of my daughter. You are going to treat her like princess, a queen, or I will kick your scrawny ass all over this town. Do you hear me?" he asked.

"You have my word, Charlie," I said, sincerely. "Bella and our baby are my life and I will not mistreat either of them."

"I believe you," he smiled. "Prove it to her."

Charlie turned and walked out of the room, leaving me with just my father, brother, and best friend. Emmett came over and placed his hand on my shoulder, clearing his throat as he said, "Congratulations, little Bro." He smiled and shook his head. "Hurt her and I'll help Charlie."

Emmett clapped me on the back and walked out, followed by Jasper who was laughing heartedly. Carlisle whistled and looked back at me. "I sure would hate to get on either of their bad sides," he chuckled.

"Me too," I muttered, raising my hands up to my hair. Carlisle grabbed my arms and stopped me before I ruined my hair.

"Alice will kill you if you mess your hair up," he said. "I don't really want to lose my son, and I'm pretty sure Bella doesn't want to lose you, either."

"Only pretty sure?" I asked.

"Eh, I'm just guessing," he said, shrugging his shoulders.

"Are you mad that we didn't tell you about the baby?" I asked. Carlisle laughed and shook his head.

"No, I'm more mad that I didn't figure it out," he sighed. "I'm a goddamn doctor. Here she's been sick as a dog, moody as hell, and I didn't think she could have been pregnant."

"It's been rough for her," I murmured.

"It'll get better," he smiled. "How far along is she?"

"Almost eleven weeks," I said, smiling. "It's been so damn crazy, Dad, but I am already in love with that baby."

"It doesn't take long," he chuckled. He placed his hand on my shoulder. "Edward, I'm not one for sentimental shit at all, but I wanted to tell you that I am so proud of you. You're a good man. I know that whatever happened before you came back was hard, but Bella saved you, too. I just want you to be happy, son," said Carlisle, blinking back his tears.

I took a deep breath. "Dad, I love her so much," I murmured. "She thinks I've done so much for her but, it was all her. All her. I just…"

"I know," whispered Carlisle. "I feel the same way about your mom, Edward. The same way."

Carlisle and I didn't say anything else as we headed out to the sanctuary. My nerves were running in full speed but I was also so excited. Emmett was sitting in the front pew with Rose. It was clear that they loved each other, and after what she told me about that asshole she used to be with, I knew he would be good to her. Rose deserved someone like Emmett. Carlisle moved over and slipped his arm around my mother, leaning in and kissing her cheek.

Jasper was sitting next Alice, who was beaming. As annoying as my little sister was, I loved her. She had a good heart and loved her family, all of her family, so much. She literally hurt when we hurt. Garrett and Kate were sitting behind them, next to Tyler and Lauren. They had all proven to be good friends to Bella and to me.

I moved over and stood in front of Reverend Weber, smiling at him. He merely nodded his head as the music started playing. Instinctively, I looked back at the back of the church. There she was, arm wrapped around her father's. My Isabella. She looked amazing and she had the most breathtaking smile on her face. My nerves disappeared as Charlie walked her down the aisle to me, placing her hand in mine.

He reached out and shook my head, silently telling me that he was happy for us, and that he would kill me if I ever hurt her. I shook his hand back, acknowledging both the threat and his approval. He moved over and stood next to my mother. Bella smiled at me as we turned and faced Reverend Weber.

However, before he could say anything, the back door to the church opened. We all looked back and I felt the bile rise up in my throat. The only person I had hoped I would never see again, was barging into my wedding. I could feel my face turning bright red, not from embarrassment or even humiliation but from pure anger.

"Edward, don't!" yelled Jessica. "You can't marry her."

I could feel Bella's eyes boring into me as she looked from Jessica and up to me. "Who is that?" she asked.

"Jessica," I gritted. Bella inhaled deeply as she looked over at her. I pulled Bella behind as I turned and looked at Jessica. "Get out of here."

"Edward, look, I know-"

"You know nothing, Jessica," I spat. "You come barging in here on my wedding day, and tell me not to marry the woman I am in love with."

"You love me," insisted Jessica, stepping forward. Alice sprang out of the pews, like a fucking ninja, and blocked her way.

"Get the fuck away from my brother, bitch," she sneered. Alice looked over her shoulder at Reverend Weber. "Sorry, Rev, but someone needs to tell this bitch how it is."

"I'm not here," Reverend Weber muttered, sitting back in one the seats behind him. "Carry on."

"Edward, we need to talk," said Jessica, putting her hands up. "I know I made some mistakes-"

"Mistakes," I laughed, harshly. "Mistakes is kind of an understatement, Jessica. I found you in our apartment, riding some fucking kid on our fucking couch," I hissed. Jessica flinched and I could feel everyone looking back at me. I hadn't told anyone other than Bella what had happened between me and Jessica. My eyes fluttered to a close with I felt Bella slip her hand into mine. "I want you to leave now, Jessica. Don't ever come back here, again. Don't come near me, or my wife, or my family, ever again."

"Edward-" She started.

"He said to leave, you stupid bitch," snapped Bella, stepping out from behind me. Jessica glared at her. "You've done enough fucking damage to him. I am really not in the mood to listen to your shit so get the fuck out of here before I kick your fake ass!"

"Who the hell do you think you are?" snapped Jessica.

"Jessica-"

"I'm his life," snapped Bella, interrupting me.

"I was once, too," she muttered.

"No, you weren't," I said. Jessica snapped her eyes over to me, gasping. "You were nothing more than someone I was settling for. I almost made the biggest mistake of my life by marrying you, Jessica. The fact that you could so easily throw me away like that…Bella would never do that to me."

"You don't know that," grumbled Jessica.

"I do," I said, slipping my arm around Bella's waist. "She saved me. I was nothing when she came to me, because of you. You have no idea how hurt I was that you could throw away all our time together. She doesn't care that I didn't want to go to medical school. She loves that I loved teaching, that I love standing in front of my classroom and teaching those kids. She loves me for me, and not who you think I should have been. Quite honestly, I give a fucking shit what you want anymore. I have the woman I was supposed to be with. You can go to hell."

I pulled Bella into my chest and headed to one of the side rooms off the sanctuary, leaving Jessica standing there gaping at me. Bella slipped her arms around me. I shut the door behind us, pulling her into my chest and closing my eyes. Our perfect moment had been ruined by that crazy ass bitch. Story of our fucking lives, I guess.

"Baby, I am so fucking sorry," I whispered. Bella pulled back and looked up at me.

"Why are you sorry?" she asked. "You didn't tell that bitch to come here, did you?"

"No, but-"

"There are no buts, Edward," smiled Bella. "She got jealous because she realized that you had moved on and she was alone. She thought she could come in and try to get you back but, Baby, your ass is mine and nobody is taking you from me."

"My ass is totally yours," I chuckled, leaning my forehead down on hers. "You look beautiful."

"Thank you," she whispered. "I really want to fuck you against the wall. Is that wrong?"

"Yes, only because we are in the church," I murmured. "I fully intend of fucking against the wall we when we get home."

"I suppose that will work," she sighed.

I leaned down, capturing her lips with mine and it was like time stood still. As our mouths moved against each others, there was just Edward and Bella. No crazy ex-girlfriends, no psychos except for the people we called our family. It was just us and were going to get through this little obstacle and every other thing thrown at us. This was nothing.

"Whoa," said Emmett. I pulled my lips from Bella's and looked over to see my brother standing in the doorway, trying his hardest to advert his eyes from us. "We got rid of the trash and we were wondering if we were going to have a wedding or…"

"Yes, we are having a wedding," smiled Bella. Emmett sighed in relief as he looked up at her.

"Good, cause Alice and Esme threatened to go find that little bitch and beat her ass if you two decided not to get married," he chuckled.

"As tempting as that is," giggled Bella, grabbing my hands. "Let's not keep them waiting."

I laughed with her as we followed Emmett back out to the sanctuary. Charlie and Carlisle were talking to Reverend Weber, while Rose had her arms around both Esme and Alice. It think she was trying to keep them from running after Jessica and beating her ass. Part of me, wanted to let them. Garrett, Kate, Tyler, and Lauren were just sitting there, clearly unsure of what to say or do. Emmett cleared his throat as Jasper came back into the sanctuary, nodding his head over at my brother. I thought about asking what that was about, but opted not to. There were just some things that weren't worth asking. Everyone looked over at me and Bella, with caution written on all their faces.

"Is everything ok?" asked Charlie, stepping away from Reverend Weber. "Bella?"

"Everything is fine, Dad," she said, leaning into me. "It's not perfect like we wanted but it's still great."

"Are we still having a wedding?" asked Esme, fretfully.

"Bella and I are still getting married," I said. I looked over at Reverend Weber. "As long as you are still willing to marry us."

"Of course I will," he smiled. "Let's get started."

As everyone moved back to their seats, smiles on their faces, Bella and I moved back so that we were standing in front of Reverend Weber. I brought Bella's hand up to my lips, placing a gentle kiss on her knuckles. Reverend Weber cleared his throat and we looked up at him.

"We are gathered here today…."

-)&(-

"Oh my god, then Bella came running out of the school, screaming her head off about how the numbers were trying to eat her," laughed Kate, leaning back in her seat. We were all laughing, even Bella, who had her head buried in my chest. "I didn't think we were ever going to get her back into the school."

"I don't care what you say, they were after me," smiled Bella, looking back at Kate. "Besides, I blame you, Katie, for giving me way too much coffee."

"You were the one who said you had to study all night for the SAT's," she smirked. I laughed and shook my head.

"I don't know why you are laughing, Edward," said Esme, giving me a look. "Do I need to tell everyone about the phone I got after your first midterm at UT?"

"No," I groaned, ducking me head.

"YES!" screamed Bella, Alice, Rose, Kate, and Lauren.

I rolled my eyes at everyone as I picked up my glass of water, taking a small sip. We were sitting in the dining room at Carlisle and Esme's house, enjoying the delicious meal that Alice had arranged for us. My wife was nestled up next to me, arm looped through mine and a smile on her face. We had officially been married for three whole, blissful hours. She looked up at me, blushing a rosy pink.

"Ok, so it was at the first part of November, and I was in the middle of class when my cell phone went off," started Esme. I closed my head, ducking my head.

"Mother," I muttered.

"Now, I normally wouldn't have my phone on but the weather had been bad and I was worried about Bella and Alice, who had gone to Wellington to play basketball. So I dug my phone out of my purse and there was my baby boy," smiled Esme.

"Mother," I said, again while everyone laughed at her calling me baby boy. She, however, just waved me off.

"I answered the phone and heard this sniffling," she continued. "I asked him what was wrong but he wouldn't say anything. After trying four times, I told him to just tell me already. He said that he had taken a midterm in his biology class and only made a ninety-three percent."

"It was a not a ninety-three," I said, defending myself as everyone looked over at me. "It was ninety-one."

"Cause those two points make all the difference, Eddie," laughed Kate.

"Kate, don't call me Eddie," I muttered.

Bella laughed and looked up at me, smiling widely. "You really freaked out over a getting an A minus on your midterm?" she asked.

"I did," I admitted. "I was young and stupid then."

"Compared to being the old and stupid man you are now," piped up Alice. She was leaning against Jasper, smiling as she held her wine glass in her hands.

"Exactly," I smirked.

"Ok, enough embarrassing stories." Charlie chuckled as he stood up, holding his beer up to us. "I would like to propose a toast." We all picked up our glasses, me and Bella holding sparkling white cider. "To Bella and Edward, who alone today proved that not even the skankiest of bitches can tear you apart."

"Dad," laughed Bella, shaking her head. "I can't believe you just said skankiest and bitch in my wedding toast."

Charlie waved her off and continued you on. "The two of you have shown us all how to fight for each other, how to let go of the pain that often holds us down, and to love each other," said Charlie. His lip trembled as he took a deep breath. "I'm proud to have you both as my children and, I call dibs on spoiling the grandchild."

"No way, Charlie Swan," laughed Esme, standing up. She looped her arm through his. "We get to share in spoiling duty."

"Ok, I can do that," smiled Charlie. "To Bella and Edward."

"To Bella and Edward," murmured everyone, raising their glasses to us. Bella and I turned to each other.

"To us," I whispered.

"To us," she whispered, back. I leaned in and captured her lips with mine, sighing at the contact. Bella smiled against my lips before pulling back. "I'm ready to go home."

"Me too," I whispered. Looking back at everyone, I found them all discretely looking away, even if they were all smiling to themselves. "Bella and I are heading home. Thank you all for coming today. For sticking with us through all the crap and, mostly, just being you."

"Aw, I'm going to cry," chuckled Emmett. I rolled my eyes as I stood up, bringing Bella up with me.

"Except for you, you ass," I smirked.

Emmett feigned hurt but Rose leaned over and whispered something in his ear. Based on the glazed over look on his face, it wasn't anything we wanted to hear. Everyone followed me and Bella out into the living room. Bella started hugging everyone, starting with Garrett and Kate, followed by Tyler and Lauren. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked over to see Emmett, smiling at my wife.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here for you more after you came back," he said, looking over at me. "If I had known…"

"I didn't want anyone to know," I murmured. "None of you liked her and I didn't want to be told that you were right."

"We would have," admitted Emmett, smiling. He looked back over at Bella, who was cuddled up with Alice and Rose. "She's been good for you, Edward. You've done amazing things for her, but I think she's done more for you."

"She has," I whispered. "Just like Rose has for you."

"I love her," murmured Emmett, looking at me. "I'm going to marry her and have babies with her. I am never letting her go."

"Good," I said, placing my hand on his shoulder. "Cause that woman deserves it all, Em."

"I know," he said, quietly.

As Bella made her way over to her father, Emmett headed over to Rose. He pulled her into his arms, bringing her as close he could. Rose melted into his arms and I knew they were going to have a long and happy life together. My attention shifted over to Bella, who was being hugged by Charlie. She had her head on his chest and they were laughing. It was nice to see them getting even closer than they already were.

"My darling boy, have I told you that I am proud of you?" asked Esme, sliding her arm in with mine.

"A few times over the years," I said, looking over at my mother.

"Good grades, academic and sport accomplishments are nothing compared to the pride I feel for you right now," she smiled. "Edward, not every man would do what you have done for that girl."

"I know that," I said, looking over at Bella. "But I needed her, Mom. Way more than she needed me."

"Perhaps," murmured Esme. She leaned in and kissed my check. "I love you, Edward. You are good man. You are going to be good husband to Bella. You are going to be an amazing father."

"Thank you, Mom," I whispered, feeling the tears building in my eyes.

"Are you ready?" asked Bella, sliding back into my arms.

"Yes," I murmured. "More than ready."

Bella smiled as she leaned up and kissed me, quickly, before we headed out to my car. I shook my head at the cheesy decorations that covered my car; the streamers, tin cans tied to the bumper, and the shoe polish on the windows that announced to the world that Bella and I were married. Somehow, I knew this was Emmett and Jasper's doing and I couldn't find it in myself to be mad at them.

I helped Bella into the front seat of the car and ran around to my side. Climbing in, I noticed all our family and friends on the porch, watching us as we headed home for our first night together as man and wife. Bella looked over and waved at them all, before turned back to me. She had tears swimming in her eyes but I knew they were tears of joy and happiness.

I reached over and grabbed her hand, bringing it up to my lips. She smiled as I shifted the car into drive and we headed home. I pulled into our driveway a few minutes later, feeling happy and nervous for some reason. Trying to shake off those nerves, I climbed out of the car and headed around to help my wife out. Bella placed her hand into my, and helped her out.

We made our way into the house, locking the front door behind us. Without saying anything, we headed into the bedroom, kicking off our shoes and turning to face one another. I suddenly felt like a virgin, planning on making love for the first time. Bella reached up to take off the gold locket from around her neck but I reached out and stopped her.

"Let me," I murmured.

She merely smiled and turned around. I ran my hands over her shoulders and grasped the clasp in between my fingers. Bella shivered but I knew it had nothing to do with being cold. I removed the locket, laying on top of the dresser and lowered my lips down onto her neck, slowly moving them up until I reached her ear.

"You look so fucking amazing," I whispered.

"Edward," she moaned, letting her head fall back on my shoulder.

I ran my hands down her arms, lifting them up and wrapping them around my neck. Her fingers automatically wove themselves in my hair and it was my turn to shiver. I turned my lips back to her neck as I brought my hands down her side and back of her dress. Slowly lowering the zipper, I let the dress pool at her feet. Looking at her through the mirror that stood in the corner of our room, my breath caught in my chest. She looked beautiful. Her eyes met mine and she smiled, wickedly.

"I believe, Mr. Cullen, that you promised to do something to me that consisted of me against a wall, didn't you?" she asked, seductively. My cock twitched against the front of my pants.

"I did," I murmured, reaching up and released the clasp on her bra, letting it fall to the floor at her feet. Her nipples were peaked and hard. I brought my hands around, rubbing her sensitive nipples under my fingers.

"Edward," she moaned, pushing her breasts into my hands. "Please."

"Please, what, Baby?" I asked, nipping on her skin. "Tell me what you want."

"You," she cried. "Just you."

"You have me," I whispered, spinning her around.

In what can only be explained as a flurry, I tore off my suit, tossing it carelessly around the room, until I was standing in front of her butt naked. I pressed Bella into the wall behind her and gripped the side of her panties, pulling them down slowly. I dropped them on the floor and looked up at her. She was watching me with hooded eyes, lust and love shining out of her. I pulled her leg up, placing it on my shoulder and brought my mouth down onto her pussy.

Bella moaned, grinding herself down on my tongue. She was wet, dripping for me and I was lapping up as much as I could of her. She reached down and gripped my hair in her hands, pulling hard. That only egged me on, knowing that I was pushing her over the edge. Bella began whimpering and I could tell she was getting close. I sucked her clit into my mouth, and bit down just enough to bring her pleasure.

"OH FUCK," she screamed, releasing my hair only to hit the wall behind her as she came hard.

I savored everything she gave me, letting her pour into mouth before I stood up and pressed myself against her. Bella moaned as she leaned in and kissed me, tasting herself on me. I gripped her hips in my hands, lifting her off the ground. She wrapped her legs around my waist. My cock was nestles just outside of her wet sex, begging to be let in. I pulled my lips from hers.

"I love you, Mrs. Cullen," I murmured, sliding into her.

"Oh, God, I love you, too!" she cried out.

As always, she was warm around me, tight and just perfect. Our bodies moved with each others, making the other moan or whimper with need. Our hearts were connected, even if they sat in separate chests. I grabbed Bella's hand, lacing my fingers in with hers and holding it above her head as I moved in and out of her, loving her. As our bodies shook, with our mutual releases, we slid to the floor with our bodies still wrapped around each other. I was wrapped in the arms of my wife, my soul mate, my everything.


	42. Chapter 42

Forty-two

BPOV

Edward and I had spent all day Sunday in bed, making love and talking. Mostly making love. Every time I looked at the rings sitting on my left hand, I smiled. I couldn't believe that Edward and I were actually, officially married. When I came driving back into Clarendon almost five months ago, I never thought I would get married again. I never thought anyone would love me, or want me, the way Edward did. Somehow, he made me feel like I was worth it all; love and happiness. He made me feel like I was most precious thing in the world to him. I knew I was. At least until our baby was born and then I would happily share that title.

Of course, Monday morning came all too quickly and we had to leave our bed and go to work. It was much harder than I expected it to be. We showered, dressed for work, made breakfast. All the things that married people do. All the things we had been doing for the last few months but it felt different now that we were married. Normal for us, at least. None of the things that I did with Mike. Well, maybe I did but it never felt the way it did with Edward. He made me feel loved and appreciated. He made me feel beautiful.

"What are you thinking about?" murmured Edward, pressing his naked body against mine early Wednesday morning. I smiled as I leaned into his embrace.

"You," I said, simply.

"Me?" he asked, moving his soft lips to crest of my ear. "Why are you thinking about me?"

"I was thinking about how much I love you," I whispered, looking over my shoulder at him. I felt so vulnerable, like I had just shared the darkest of all secrets with him. Edward smiled as he leaned in and pressed his lips down onto mine.

"I love you, too, my love," he whispered, peppering my lips with his. "More and more everyday."

"Make love to me," I begged, shakily. "Please."

Edward didn't say anything as he rolled so that he was hovering over me, nestling himself in between my legs. I could feel his manhood pressing against me, and I wanted him now. I wrapped my legs around the back of his and pulled him into my body. We both moaned, enjoying the feeling of being as one again. Edward nestled his head into the crook of my neck as he slowly started moving in and out of me.

There really wasn't anything like feeling him inside of me, or on top of me, loving me with every inch of his body. Edward grunted as he slid his hand down the side of my body, reaching my thigh. He pulled my leg up and over his hip, deepening his thrust inside of me. I had no idea how he could manage to go deeper than he already was but he did. My hands slid up Edward's back, gripping his hair between my fingers. He shivered as his skin erupted in goose bumps.

"Oh, Bella," he murmured, pressing his lips down onto my over heated skin. "You feel so fucking amazing, baby. Fucking amazing."

"Edward," I gasped, tightening my grip on his hair. I could feel my orgasm coming, building as my walls started to clench around him. "Edward, please!"

"Oh, baby," he growled, thrusting harder.

Moments later, our bodies shook as we came together, whispering each other's names and pressing our lips together. It was perfect. After several minutes of laying in each other's arms, letting our lips and hands speak for us, we climbed out of our bed and headed into the bathroom to get ready for our very busy day.

This afternoon, Edward and I were going back to Amarillo to my doctor's appointment with Charlotte. I couldn't help but worry that there was something wrong with the baby. Every book I've read and every website that I have looked at, talked about only seeing your doctor every month until you were much further along. However, Charlotte seemed to want me to come in every couple of weeks and I was worried that there was a reason, something she wasn't telling us, that she wanted us to come in so much.

Edward and I finished our shower, dried off, and headed back out to our bedroom. I could feel his eyes on me as I got ready for work, opting to wear a pair of black pants and a white sweater. Every time I looked over at him, he would smile and look down at his feet, causing me to blush. It was intense and highly sexual, even if we weren't actually having sex. I slipped on my black flats and headed into the kitchen, leaving him to get ready for work. I needed to take a breath without him causing me to blush, if that was at all possible.

I made us both some oatmeal and toast, skipping the coffee we both loved and opting for juice instead. I missed coffee but I would do whatever it took to make sure our baby, our son or daughter, had every chance for a healthy start in life. Even if that meant going without the hot, steaming beverage that I craved so much.

"Baby, what are you thinking about now?" asked Edward, slipping his arms around my waist.

"Coffee," I sighed, laying my head back on his shoulder. "I miss it."

"I miss it, too, but one day you will get to have it again," he chuckled, kissing my cheek. "Until then, you can either drink decaf or juice, I guess."

"Decaf sucks," I muttered, turning in his arms.

"It really does," agreed Edward, nodding his head. He leaned in and pressed his lips to mine. "Hmmm, your lips taste good."

"So do yours," I murmured against his lips.

Edward kissed me again before pulling me over and sitting me in his lap. I laughed at my silly, loving, adorable husband and started eating the breakfast I had made the two of us. Edward had a smile on his face the entire time, one that I couldn't help but match. Everything seemed perfect right now, and deep inside of me, that scared the crap out of me.

"Ok, so, I'll pick you up from school at lunch," said Edward, bringing his hand down onto my abdomen. "Does that sound ok?"

"Perfect," I smiled, leaning my forehead down onto his. "My appointment is at two so that gives us plenty of time."

"Do you want to drive your car or mine?" asked Edward, rubbing small circles on my tummy. It tickled but I didn't stop him. I loved his hands on me like this.

"Mine, of course," I laughed.

"Of course, what was I thinking?" he asked, laughing with me. He leaned up and kissed me again. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I murmured, bringing my hand up and cradling his face. "So much."

After a few more minutes of kissing, I reluctantly headed out to my car and left Edward in the kitchen. It was the hardest thing to do, leave him sitting there like that. You would have thought that I wasn't going to see him in just a handful of hours or something. I sighed as I climbed into my car and drove to the school, preparing for my day with the kids.

I parked my car in the parking lot and headed inside, smiling at all the little faces that passed me in the hallway. The greatest thing about working in the school was seeing all the kids. They made it worth it all. I headed down to my library and found Kate and Lauren waiting for me next to my door. Based on the looks on their faces, they were up to something. I just wasn't sure what that was.

"Good morning," I said, unlocking my door.

"Morning," they nearly sang together as they followed me in.

I went around my desk and put my purse up before sitting down and starting my computer. They both leaned against the counter, neither of them saying a word but both of them smiling like a couple of fools. I sighed as I leaned back in my chair and looked at them.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"What makes you think we want something?" asked Lauren, throwing me her best smile. I just stared at her. "Ok, we want a girls night out and you have to come."

"When?" I asked.

"Friday," smiled Kate. "If you can leave that hubby of yours for five minutes."

I rolled my eyes as I stood up and started clearing out the book return cart. "I am not that bad," I scoffed.

Both Kate and Lauren burst out laughing, which irritated the crap out of me. "Yeah, like you and Eddie aren't attached at the lips or something," snorted Kate.

"Whatever," I said. "Who's all going to girls night?"

"Us, Alice, and Rose," smiled Lauren. I smiled about them inviting Rose.

"Hmm, I'm in, as long as Edward hasn't already made plans for us," I said, quietly. "Thanks for inviting Rose."

"She's cool," smiled Lauren. "Anyone who can keep Emmett in line has to be pretty awesome."

"Very true," I murmured.

The bell rang and Kate and Lauren headed down to their classrooms, leaving me alone. I spent all morning shelving books and helping the little ones in Kindergarten find books in their book level. They were all so sweet and looked like they were scared to death about being given the responsibility of taking care of one of my books. It made me smile to think that one day, mine and Edward's child would be here and I might be doing this for him or her.

Once I had finished my lunch duty with my kids, I grabbed myself a chicken sandwich and headed out to meet Edward. He was leaning against my car, smirk planted on his face, and a large strawberry limeade in his left hand. I nearly broke out into a full run as I crossed the street. He opened his right arm and caught me, pulling me right against his chest. He slowly leaned down and pressed his lips onto mine.

"Break it up, kids," teased Garrett. I pulled back and looked over at him as he was crossing the parking lot toward the school. "You two are so cute, it's sickening."

I ignored him as I turned back to Edward, eyeing the drink in his hand. "Is that for me?" I asked, sweetly.

"This?" he asked, holding up the drink. I nodded my head, softly. "It's for my beautiful and sexy wife."

"Oh," I sighed, dramatically as I stepped away. "Guess you had better go find her, then."

"Come here, you," he growled, pulling me back into his arms. He lowered his lips down to my ear, causing me to shiver. "You know I was talking about you."

"Do I?" I asked, coyly.

"Don't you?" he murmured, running his nose up to my ear. "There will never be anyone else for me but you, love."

"Me either," I whispered, turning my head and capturing his lips with mine.

Our lips moved slowly, cautiously against each others. It was almost like time stood still, waiting for us to have our private moment before starting to click again. Of course, it didn't and we were reminded of that fact when a car drove by the school and honked. Edward and I looked back to see Charlie's police truck driving by. I shook my head at my silly father and turned to face my husband of four days.

"Are you ready?" I asked.

"Yes," he smiled, handing me my drink.

I slid into the drivers seat while Edward ran around to the passenger seat. He was gracious enough to not make it a big deal that I preferred to drive my car, seeing at in a handful of months I would be lucky if I can even fit behind the wheel any longer. I took a deep draw of my strawberry limeade and placed my cup in the cup holder. Once I had my seat belt on, I started my car and headed toward Amarillo.

An hour later, I parked my car in the parking lot of Charlotte's office building. I would be lying if I said that I wasn't nervous and scared to death about this appointment. Logically, I knew I was overreacting and needed to calm down but the other part of me, the less rational part of me, was freaking out. Would it ever get easier?

Edward and I climbed out of the car and headed inside, taking the elevator to the fifth floor. When the doors chimed, I jumped a little. Edward didn't say anything as he tightened his arm around my waist and lead me over to the check in desk. Jane looked up and smiled at me, a real smile like she was genuinely happy to see me here.

"Hello, Bella," she said.

"You remembered my name?" I asked, before I could stop myself.

"Of course I did," she said, laughing a small tinkling laugh. "How are you feeling?"

"Um, pretty good," I murmured.

"Good, well, Dr. Davis will be with you very soon," smiled Jane.

I returned her smile and followed Edward over to the group of chairs, sitting down next to him. He automatically took my hand in his, bringing it up to his lips. Of course, I blushed. Edward and I only had to wait a few minutes before Heidi was calling us back. She, too, was smiling. It felt like everyone was smiling around here. Edward placed his hand on my back as we followed her back.

"So how's everything going?" she asked, pointing to the scale. I handed Edward my purse and stepped up on the scale.

"Good," I replied. Heidi marked my weight; I had lost three pounds since my first visit.

"Based on that sparkling diamond on your left hand, I would say things are better than just good," she smirked, looking from me to Edward. "And the wedding ring on his finger. Are congratulations in order?"

"Yes," I murmured, blushing. "We were married on Saturday."

"Aw, how sweet," she sighed, dreamily. For a moment, she seemed to get lost in her own little memory. She smiled as she shook her head. "Sorry, I was just imagining your wedding."

"It's fine," I murmured. She motioned for me to follow her down the hallway to one of the small rooms.

"Any concerns today?" she asked, patting the table for me to climb up.

"Um, no, not really," I muttered.

Heidi nodded her head as she started checking my blood pressure, temperature, and other vitals. Once she had everything written down, she told us Charlotte would be in shortly and left. Edward stood next to me, one hand laying on my back and the other resting on my knee. I could feel my body relax as I leaned on him, letting my head rest on his chest. It was amazing how just feeling his touch made me feel so comfortable.

"Knock, knock," sang Charlotte, pushing the door open and sticking her head in. "Can I come in? I hear there are newly weds in here and I don't take to seeing the baby making in progress."

"Well, since there is already a baby, I guess you can," laughed Edward.

Charlotte laughed with him as she came in, shutting the door behind her. She went over and washed her hands, pulling a couple of paper towels down to dry them. She tossed them in the trash and looked back at us, smiling as she looked between us.

"Well, you look great," she said, finally. "Much better than the first time I saw you. Are the meds helping with the nausea?"

"Yes," I said, nodding my head. "I feel so much better."

"Good, good," she murmured, picking up my chart. "You've lost a few pounds but that is not unusual in the early stages of a pregnancy." Charlotte placed my chart down and crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Any questions? Any concerns?"

"Um, no," I muttered, looking down at my feet.

"Bella," she said, lifting my chin up to look at her. "Talk to me, honey. I can't help you if you don't talk to me."

"Well," I started but hesitated.

"Yes?" she prompted.

"Is there something wrong with the baby?" I blurted out.

"What?" she asked.

"Everything I've read says that you shouldn't be seeing me this much unless you are concerned about my health or the baby's," I explained. "Is there something wrong with me? The baby?"

"You both are perfectly fine," she smiled, grabbing my hand. "I wanted to keep a close eye on you because I know that you are scared and nervous, Bella. When a woman goes through a loss like you did back in the spring, it can be difficult for them to believe that everything is going smoothly. It's something I know all too well."

"You do?" I asked, quietly. Charlotte smiled and nodded her head.

"I was a little further along than you were when you lost your baby but I don't think it makes the pain go away. Although, I was and am very lucky to have such a supportive husband. Something you clearly have in Edward, here," smiled Charlotte.

"Can I ask you something?" I whispered, pulling on the inside of my lip.

"Anything," she murmured.

"Does it ever get easier?" I asked. Edward slipped his arm tighter around my waist but I couldn't look at him. "I thought I didn't want that baby, until they were gone." I shook my head as I batted back my tears. "I realize now it's not the baby I didn't want, it was that life, that hell, I was trapped in."

"I…I can't honestly say that it gets easier, just more tolerable," smiled Charlotte. "It's been almost two years for me and my husband, Peter, and there isn't a day go by that I don't think of our son. But at the same time, I know that life can't stop because he isn't here or because it hurts to think about who he would have been right now. One day, maybe we'll give it another try."

"Oh," I murmured, unsure of what to say.

"Ok, let's check you out so that we can get you on your way back home," she said, pushing off the counter. "This is the last place two newly weds want to be."

Edward and I both laughed softly as I laid back on the examination table. Charlotte lifted my shirt up and pressed down on my belly for a moment. Maybe she could sense that I needed to see that our baby was really ok with my own two eyes because she hit the lights and started the ultrasound machine. There sitting in the middle of the little black screen was our baby, little arms and legs flailing around like crazy. Tears filled my eyes as I wanted him or her. They were ok, and I did feel better seeing for myself.

Once Charlotte printed off a couple of pictures, she helped me clean the gel off my tummy and told me she would see me in a few weeks and not to be afraid to call her if I needed anything, emphasizing anything. Somehow, I knew that she would be on the other end of the phone anytime I needed someone to talk to, share my fears with. It was nice to know.

Edward and I headed out to the front desk and made my next appointment for three weeks from now. I slipped my hand into his as we rode the elevator down to the first floor and headed out to my car. We climbed in and I drove us around the park that sat around the small lake behind the hospital. I was in the mood to walk for a little bit. Edward and I climbed out of the car and headed down to the sidewalk and started walking, slowly as we weren't in a hurry. The air was cool but not cold. It was perfect.

"Bella, why didn't you tell me that you were feeling sad about your other baby?" asked Edward, several minutes later. I laid my head on his shoulder as we started walking.

"I didn't want you to think that I wanted Mike," I muttered.

"I know you don't, love," he sighed, slipping his arm around my waist. "I just want you to know that I am here for you anytime you need someone to talk to."

"I know that," I said, looking up at him. "Honestly, Edward, I don't even know what I am feeling. I hate thinking about that part of my life. I disgusts me that I spent so long letting him hurt me, that I almost brought a child into that world. I wouldn't have been any better than David Newton was by exposing that baby to Mike. I never thought I wanted that baby and I feel guilty for that."

"Baby, you shouldn't feel guilty for not wanting to have a child with him," said Edward. "In a lot of ways, that baby set you free. He or she gave you the strength to fight back and leave him."

"Maybe," I muttered, looking out over the water.

Edward and I walked around the lake for a little while longer before we headed back up to the car. We climbed in, stopped and got a drink, and headed back to Clarendon. Back to our small house, our loving home. Back to where it was just me and Edward, for at least a few more months.


	43. Chapter 43

Forty-three

"Baby, my feet are cold," I whined, rolling onto my back and looking over at Edward. He groaned and lifted his shirt up. "Thank you," I sighed, slipping my feet into his shirt.

"Jesus Christ, Bella," he yelped the moment my feet touched him. "Why aren't you wearing socks?"

"I hate socks," I said, shrugging my shoulders. "Besides, that's why I have you."

"Gee, so glad I could be here for you," he said, sarcastically.

"Hmm, I could stay home tonight and make it up to you," I purred.

"No," he said, simply. I groaned, digging my feet into him. "Stop!"

"Fine," I sighed, pulling my feet out from under his shirt and rolling on the bed so that I was back onto my stomach. "If you don't want me here."

The bed shifted as Edward moved so that he was hovering over me, pressing his delicious body down onto mine. Like that was going to help me not call the girls and cancel on them tonight. Edward slid his hand down the side of my body to the hem of my blue t-shirt. Slipping his hand under, he slid it back up my body, leaving a fiery wake in it's path. My body shivered against him and it had nothing to do with how cold it was.

"Baby, you know that I want you here," he murmured, caressing my skin. I lifted my ass, pressing into his growing erection. "Beeellllaaaaa."

"Yes, love," I whispered, looking over my shoulder at him.

"You need to start getting ready," he groaned, falling onto the bed next to me. "Alice and Rose will be here soon and if you aren't ready… Well, I don't think I want to think about what she will do to you."

We both knew he was referring to his sister and the fit she would throw. "I don't want to go," I muttered.

"Yes, you do," he smiled, rolling so that he was facing me. "You'll have fun."

"But I'm going to miss you," I mumbled, feeling my face turn bright red.

"I'll miss you, too, Baby, but you need girl time," he murmured, pushing a strand of hair out of my face. "Have fun, please? For me?"

"You're a cheater," I grumbled.

"I know," he smirked, leaning over and kissing me. "Now, go shower."

I didn't argue with him as I climbed off the bed. However, I did strip off my shirt and throw it at him. He growled, causing my panties to dampen. The man had no clue how much him growling turned me on. I walked into the bathroom and stripped off the rest of my clothes, tossing them into the hamper before I started the shower. I turned back to the mirror, letting my eyes drop to my flat abdomen. I wonder how long it would be before I started showing.

I couldn't wait for my belly to start growing, to feel my baby moving inside of me. To know that he or she was really in there and really doing ok. I shook my head, trying to push all negative thoughts out of my head and stepped into the shower. Worrying that something was wrong with me or the baby wasn't going to help anything but cause me undo stress and lots of sleepless nights. Lord knows, I don't need either of those.

I quickly showered and dried off. Alice and Rose would be here in less than an hour to pick me up for our girls night out with Kate and Lauren. I wasn't sure why I agreed to go out with them and leave my very sexy and very loving husband at home but I did. Now, none of them would let me out of going with them. I suppose I saw their points about needing to have girl time and whatever but I was going to miss him. Fuck, I sounded so sappy right now.

When I walked back into mine and Edward's bedroom, I expected to see him laying on the bed but he wasn't. I walked over to the closet and tried to decide what to wear. If Alice was here, she would insist that I wear a dress or at least a skirt but since she wasn't here, I decided to go with a pair of nice jeans. It was cool tonight and I was already a little cold. Slipping on a pair of panties and a bra, I pulled the jeans on, buttoning them. They were very tight and I wouldn't be able to wear them for much longer. Now came the hard part, trying to decide what shirt to wear.

If I didn't know that Alice would have the big one, I would wear a t-shirt but I knew my little pixie friend and she would literally fall over and have the big one if I dared. That really left me a couple of sweaters and a handful of blouses. The problem was, I really didn't want to wear any of them but didn't have much else to wear. Sighing to myself, I reached in and grabbed the first shirt my hand touched. It was a chocolate brown silk top that hung loosely off one shoulder and clung to my boobs. I pulled on a pair of matching brown boots and pulled my hair up into a messy twist on the back of my head. I had just finished with my make-up when the doorbell rang.

"Where's my Bella?" squealed Alice. I rolled my eyes as I walked out of the bathroom just as she was barging into the bedroom. "OH BELLA! You look beautiful."

"Thanks," I muttered, pulling a cream sweater out of the closet. "Are we ready to go?"

"Yep," she smiled. I followed Alice back out to the living room.

Rose was standing next to Edward, looking nervous but excited. I knew all too well how unnerving Alice could be when she got like this. The great part was that I wasn't the only one wearing jeans. Rose was wearing a pair of dark wash jeans and a vibrant red top with a pair of red heels. Alice, on the other hand, was wearing a shirt black leather skirt, a silver halter top and a pair of knee high, black boots with a three inch heel. I thought about reminding her that it was October and that it was cold out but decided not to. Picking your battles and everything.

I moved over to Edward, wrapping my arms around him. "I'll call you," I murmured.

"No, she won't," sighed Alice, pulling on my arm. I turned and glared at her, yanking my arm out of her hand. Her eyes flew open and she realized that she had done wrong. "I mean, of course she will call."

"Have fun," chuckled Edward, turning my face to his. "Please."

"I'll try," I whispered. "Don't miss me too much."

"I will," he murmured, pressing his lips down onto mine. "Every second."

"Oh, for fuck sake," griped Alice, storming out of the house. Rose laughed as she followed her out, letting the screen door shut behind her.

"Go before she does something to your car," smiled Edward.

I kissed him again, grabbed my coat off the back of the couch, and ran out of the house, leaving him standing there laughing at me. Alice was standing next to my car, scowling at me as I damn near skipped down the driveway. She could be such a drama queen sometimes.

"You know, Bella," she started, folding her arms in front of her, "I'm happy that you and Edward are all in lustful love with each other but not all of us want to see you sucking face all the time. He is my brother, after all."

"Nobody asked you to watch, Mary Alice," I smiled, unlocking the car. I placed my hand on the top as I looked up at her. "Besides, how many times did I have to sit there while you and Jas made out or damn near fucked in front of me while we were high school."

"Don't know what you are talking about, Isabella Marie," she muttered, coyly.

"Of course, you don't," I scoffed. "Let's go so we can get this night started!"

The three of us climbed into my car and headed over to meet up with Kate and Lauren at Kate's house. They climbed into Lauren's car and followed us onto highway 287 and on toward Amarillo.

An hour later, I pulled my car into a parking space in front of Chili's. We climbed out of our cars and headed inside. The hostess lead the five of us to our table and we took our seats. I sat between Rose and Alice, while Kate and Lauren sat across from us. Our waiter came over and took our drink order, water, before heading to the back. Of course, not before giving Lauren the once over. She rolled her eyes as he left.

"Just like high school," I giggled, giving Lauren a pointed look.

"Don't bring that shit up," she smiled.

"What shit?" asked Rose. I turned from Lauren and looked at Rose.

"When we were all juniors we had come up one day during the summer and spent the day shopping. Before we left to go back home, we stopped here to eat. Well, our waiter flirted with Lauren the whole time. He was like really creepy looking and had to be at least a good fifteen years older than us," I explained, looking back at Lauren. "We had just started eating when he came over with the biggest Margarita I have ever seen and placed it right in front of her."

"I looked up at him and asked him what the fuck this was," laughed Lauren. "He started stammering that he thought I would like one. I stood up, placed my hands on the table and said 'I am sixteen fucking years old, asshole. Not only that but her father is the goddamn sheriff and would hand my ass over to my parents if I came back with one sip of tequila in my body.'"

"Of course, she said this as loud as she possibly could," smirked Alice.

"I had to make sure he got the point," laughed Lauren. Kate was doubled over, laughing so hard that she was drawing the attention of those around us.

"Well, he did," I snorted. "When the restaurant manager heard Lauren's rampage, he came over to see what was going on. Once he heard the whole story, he fired our waiter and gave us our food for free if we would keep this all on the down low."

"Did you?" asked Rose.

"Hell yes!" we said, together.

"Carlisle and Esme would have taken my car away," muttered Alice.

"Charlie would have made me go shopping with Alice," I smiled.

"Hey," whined Alice, huffing.

"Love you, pixie," I smiled.

Alice rolled her eyes. "Whatever."

"See, Rose, technically, we weren't allowed to come to Amarillo and we did not want our parents to find out," said Kate.

"Why did you then?" asked Rose.

"You live in Clarendon," snorted Alice. "There is nothing to do there."

"I don't mind it," smiled Rose, looking down at her hands. "It's nice to be someplace where I don't feel rushed all the time."

"Did you grow up in Chicago?" asked Kate, sipping on her water. Rose shifted in her seat, clearly uncomfortable talking about her past. Alice knew everything but Kate and Lauren didn't.

"No," murmured Rose. "I lived in New York until I was sixteen."

"Do you miss it?" asked Lauren.

"No," smiled Rose. "That wasn't my home anymore. It hadn't been in a long time."

"But don't you miss your job at all?" asked Kate.

"Trying to get asshole rapist and child molesters tossed in jail?" asked Rose, bitterly. "Why would I miss that?"

"I…" Kate looked away, awkwardly.

"Chicago wasn't Rose's home anymore than it was mine," I said, reaching out and grabbing her hand. "We both came home."

"I didn't mean…" Kate looked back at us. "I didn't mean it like that."

"We know," I said, quietly.

"Yeah, besides, Clarendon needs a good lawyer," said Rose, smiling softly. "Who knows what kind of trouble Emmett will get into."

We all laughed with her, knowing that she was right. Our waiter came back and we ordered our meals. After he left, we broke out into small talk, mostly about Lauren and Tyler's wedding, which would be held next June. She wanted all of us, including Rose, to be in her wedding. I wasn't sure if I would be up to since our baby was due in May but I couldn't turn her down. Not after all the support she gave us with our wedding. As we talked, I noticed that Rose relaxed a little at a time. This was something completely different for her. I squeezed her hand once more before I let it go and we joined in the conversation going on around us.

Once dinner was over, we paid our bill and headed back out to our cars. I wasn't sure where Kate and Lauren were leading us and Rose and Alice wouldn't tell me. I begrudgingly followed through Amarillo until we pulled up in front of Midnight Rodeo, a small bar. I groaned inwardly as I climbed out of the car and followed Rose and Alice up to the front doors where Kate and Lauren were waiting for us. Why in the hell would we come to a fucking country bar?

"I can't believe you guys want to come here," I muttered, following them inside.

The inside was crawling with drunks and women throwing themselves at said drunks. I worried my bottom lip as I followed Kate, Lauren, Rose, and Alice to a large table in the back. We took our seats as a server came around, asking what we wanted to drink. She rolled her eyes when all five of us ordered water. I wanted to tell her to fuck off but I didn't. Some people just weren't worth it.

"Why are we here?" I asked, leaning forward.

"Cause we can," smirked Kate, looping her arm in with mine. "Remember how we always said we were going to come here when we were old enough."

"That was when we were young and stupid enough to think this place was actually cool," I smiled.

"I know, right?" asked Lauren. "Ty and I came here once right after we started seeing each other. He nearly got into a fight when this motherfucker started sending drinks over to me. It took me while to calm him down."

"By that she means, that they fucked in the bathroom," laughed Alice. Lauren turned bright red as we all busted out laughing.

"Yeah, well, it worked, didn't it?" she shot back. "It was amazing."

"Ew, I do not want to hear about any of your sex lives," I giggled.

"Fine, let's talk about yours," smirked Kate.

"Gross," whined Alice. "That's my brother. I don't want to hear about him having s-e-x."

"Alice, did you just spell out sex?" I asked, laughing at her.

"Maybe," she said, blushing. Kate and Lauren were trying their hardest to stifle their laughter but they were unable to.

"Hey, Alice, you know what?" asked Rose, placing her hand under her chin as she leaned up.

"What?" asked Alice.

"Emmett is an animal in the sack," smirked Rose, winking at her. Alice grimaced. "He does this thing with his tongue-"

"Ugh," grumbled Alice, standing up. "That's it, I'm going to go dance."

Lauren and Kate chased after Alice and the three of them started to dance to some country song that I had never heard of before. Rose slid over into the seat next to me, laying her chin on my shoulder as we watched the three of them dancing.

"Is that true about Emmett?" I asked.

"Yes," murmured Rose. I turned and looked at her.

"When?" I asked.

"Your wedding night," she said, blushing. "It was the right time."

"Are you ok?" I asked, taking her hand in mine.

"I'm more than ok, Bella," she smiled. "I was scared at first but he was sweet and caring. Bella, I know now that he will never hurt me."

"No, he won't," I said, returning her smile. "But it's still scary, isn't it?"

"Yeah," she murmured. "Does it ever get easier? Emmett's the first guy I've been with since…"

"It get easier, I suppose," I said. "But I still find myself thinking about Edward's reaction before I do something or say something. Then I have to remind myself that Edward is never going to hurt me. That he loves me and our baby. For now, that's how I get through the panic when I feel it coming on."

"Me too," smiled Rose. "I am going to marry him, Bella."

"Has he asked you?" I asked.

"Not yet but we've talked about it. He understands that I need time to get my barring before we take that step but I will marry him. I will never let him go. He's it for me."

"Good," I smiled, taking her hand. "Because Charlie would probably kill him and I don't really want him to go to jail."

"Me either," laughed Rose, standing up. "Let's go dance."

"Ok," I giggled. Rose and I ran out to the dance floor and joined Kate, Lauren, and Alice.

By the time we climbed back into our cars, we were hot and sweaty but had had a great time. Several guys asked us to dance but we all smiled and said no, choosing to just dance with each other. Once we got back home, Rose and Alice headed back to their homes and I headed inside of mine and Edward's. The house was dark with the exception of a small lamp next to the door. I turned it off before heading into mine and Edward's room. He was sitting up in bed, reading. As I came in, he smiled.

"Have fun?" he asked.

"Yes," I replied. I stripped off my clothes and pulled on my pajamas. "What did you do?"

"Nothing," he said, shrugging his shoulders. "I watched TV for awhile but nothing was on so I decided to read. I missed you."

"I missed you, too," I said, quietly as I laid my head on his shoulder.

Edward wrapped his arm around my shoulder, pulling me right next to him as he went back to his books. I slipped my arm around his waist and drifted off to sleep in the arms of the man that I loved.


	44. Chapter 44

Forty-four

EPOV

"Cecil," I smirked. Bella rolled her eyes. "What is wrong with the name Cecil?"

"Nothing if you are a seventy-five year old, bald man with a walker," she snorted. "How about Aiden?"

"Aren't there already like seven Aiden's in your school?" I asked.

Bella sighed. "Yes," she admitted. "How about Trojan?"

"Like as in the condoms?" I snickered. Bella tried not to laugh but only managed to hold out for about two seconds.

"Ok, that's one is out," laughed Bella.

"How about Simon?"

"Simon Cullen," mused Bella. "It can go on the list of boy names."

"So what all names are on the list now?" I asked, rubbing her feet as she wrote on her notepad. She was leaning up against the pillow, small smile playing on her lips. I was laying on the end of the bed, watching her.

"Simon, Andrew, Bryson, Cooper, Hudson, and Lucas," said Bella, reading off our list. "Although, I still don't like Hudson."

"We agreed to put it on the list," I smiled, moving over and laying down next to her. "You still think we are having a boy?"

"I do," she said, tossing her notebook on to the floor and rolling onto her side. I smiled as I brought my hand over, laying it on the side of her small baby bump.

"I think we are having a girl," I said, bringing my forehead down onto hers.

"You're wrong," she whispered, bringing her hand up to my face.

"No, I'm not," I murmured, brushing my lips along hers.

"Edward," gasped Bella, as my hand brushed over her sensitive nipples.

Her cotton nightgown was doing nothing to hide her hardened nipples, which only grew harder under my palm. Bella brought her hand up, slipping her fingers into my hair and deepening our kiss. Her body was pressed up against mine, and my cock was begging to be inside her. Always to be inside of her. I slid my hand down her body, feeling her shiver under me, until my hand rested on her bare thigh. Bella moaned as I slid my hand up her leg, dipping under her nightgown and sliding my hand up her leg. Bella shifted under me, spreading her legs and silently asking me to touch her. Who was I to refuse my beautiful wife?

I slipped my fingers into her little white panties, feeling her wet lips. Bella moaned into my mouth as I slipped my fingers into her, slowly. She was always so warm, so wet. For me. Just for me. My beautiful, sexy wife. My Bella.

"Edward," she gasped, breaking her lips off of mine. "In me…NOW!"

I needed her, only her, so I pulled my fingers out of her panties and slipped the white cotton fabric down her legs, tossing them to the side. Bella took off her nightgown, slowly teasing me with each inch of skin she was showing. Her full, luscious breasts were on display, begging me to touch her, love her. I would always touch her, love her.

Quickly making do with my own clothing, I ran my hands up her legs, parting them for me. Bella's breath hitched as I leaned forward, letting the head of my throbbing erection press just inside of her. Keeping my eyes locked on hers, I slowly slid into her, filling her inch by inch. Her walls hugged me, caressed me inside of her. I brought my hand down, gripping her thigh as I started thrusting in and out of her, slowly and patiently. We weren't rushed. Today, we could take our time, truly enjoy the feeling of our bodies together.

"Edward," she cried out, gripping my hair tightly in her hands.

I leaned back on my heels, bringing Bella up so that she was straddling my legs with her feet planted onto the bed. She wrapped her arms around my neck, burying her head into the side of my neck. As she sunk down on me, I felt myself sliding deeper into her, filling her completely and making her mine once again. She would always be mine and I would be hers. Forever.

"Baby, I need you to come now," I gasped, feeling my orgasm burning deep. "Please!"

"So…close," she moaned, sliding her hands into my hair.

Bella pulled my head back, crushing her lips down onto mine as her body shook against me. I moaned into her mouth, letting go of my own orgasm and stilling my hips against her. Bella sighed as she pulled her lips from mine, resting her forehead down onto mine. The room was completely silent except for the sounds of our heavy breathing. I closed my eyes as I leaned in and kissed her once more.

"I love you," I murmured..

"I love you, too," she whispered. "More than you love me."

"Not possible," I laughed.

"It is," she said, seriously.

"Not," I murmured.

"Is," she smiled.

"Let's call it a tie," I whispered.

"Ok," she sighed, laying her head on my shoulder. "Guess, I have to get ready for work."

"Me too," I murmured.

Reluctantly, Bella and I headed into the bathroom and took a shower. The last thing I wanted was to leave her but I no choice. She had work and so did I. Once we were done in the shower, we dried off and got dressed for work, both opting to dress casually. My semester was over and hers was very close to being done. After making sure that she had breakfast, and ignoring her huffing about being able to take care of herself, I headed out to my car and off to work.

I parked my car in my usual parking space and headed inside the college. My office was on the second floor, above the library. Clarendon College was a very small junior college that offered students the chance the earn credit for their basic classes without costing mom or dad an arm and a leg. I unlocked my office and dumped the pile of algebra finals on my desk. I had three days to get all three hundred and fifty-seven of them graded and submitted. Then I would have a nice six week long break and I could nothing but be with my wife. I was looking forward to it more than anyone knew. Except for Bella.

Now that she was in her seventeenth week, Bella was finally getting some of her energy and strength back. She was able to eat normally and she had never looked so beautiful. Her skin glowed, her eyes sparkled, she smiled all the time, and her tummy poked out. That was my favorite part of her change. Seeing her baby bump, our baby, growing inside of her. I'm sure I sounded like the biggest pussy around but I loved watching her carry our baby. The proof of our love.

I had been in my office, grading finals for about an hour when someone knocked on my door. Without even thinking about it, I hollered for them to come in. As the door opened, I saw Jessica walking into my office. Just fucking great, I thought.

"What are you doing here?" I snapped, heatedly. Jessica rolled her eyes as she shut the door.

"I just wanted to talk to you," she sighed. She moved over and sat in front of my desk.

"I don't have anything to say to you," I said, shortly. "Get the fuck out."

"Edward, stop being so dramatic," she said, rolling her eyes.

"I am not being dramatic," I hissed, standing up. "I want you out of my office and out of my fucking life!"

"You were never this angry when we were together," she smiled.

"I wasn't this happy, either," I spat. Jessica pursed her lips together as she looked around my office. "What are you really doing here?"

"I don't really know," she sighed, looking back at me. "You're different."

"It's called being in love," I said.

"You were in love with me once," she murmured.

"No, I wasn't," I sighed, leaning back in my chair. "I loved you, Jess, but I wasn't in love with you."

"And you're in love with this woman?" she asked, quietly.

"Deeply," I said. Jessica nodded her head. "Why did you come back?"

"I heard you were getting married," she said, shaking her head. "I was fool for letting you go."

"It would have never of worked between us," I replied. "You wanted more than I could give you."

"How can you be happy here?" she asked. "This town is suffocatingly too small."

"It's not," I said.

"You will never go anywhere in this town," she said, snidely. "You will end up wasting your life away here at this school when you could have been great."

"By being a doctor?" I asked. "I told you a million fucking times that I didn't want to be a goddamn doctor."

"You used to never speak like this either," she pointed out. "In all the time we were together, I never heard you curse."

"Of course, you didn't," I snorted. "I barely got a word in with you around."

"Wow, you were never this mean, either," she muttered.

"What did you expect, Jessica?" I asked. "You fucking cheated on me, in our apartment, with some…kid."

"He was twenty," she said, defending herself.

"You were twenty-four and a grad student. He was barely a sophomore," I snapped. Jessica looked away. "How could you do that to me?"

"I don't know," she muttered. "I…I felt like you were pulling away and…You were going to leave me behind and live a life of mediocrity."

"I wasn't going to leave you," I said. Jessica looked over at me.

"You already had," she said. "I was wrong, Edward. I wish I could go back and change it but I can't."

"No, you can't," I muttered.

"You're really happy now?" she asked. "Teaching math to a bunch of kids who can barely count and being the dutiful little husband to that woman."

"That woman is my wife, Jessica," I said, testily. "She's the love of my life, my best friend."

"You said I was once," she sighed, wistfully.

"I never said that," I argued.

"Not in so many words but the intent was implied," said Jessica.

"Only to you," I murmured.

"You aren't the same Edward I knew and loved," she muttered, shaking her head.

"You're right, I'm not." I sighed as I leaned back in my chair. "Jessica, I'm happy with Bella. She's amazing and I need her."

"Bella," she murmured. "I remember you talking about her. You always said she was like your sister."

"I was lying to myself," I said. "And to you, too, I guess. I never saw how much I loved her until she came back to me."

"She's a lucky woman," said Jessica.

"I'm the lucky one," I said, smiling. Jessica moved over to the door and looked back.

"You are really happy here in this town with her, aren't you?"

"Yes, I am," I said. Jessica shook her head.

"I don't get it but I guess that doesn't really matter," she muttered. "Take care of yourself, Edward."

"You, too, Jessica," I said, sincerely.

Jessica turned and walked out of my office, shutting the door behind her. I leaned back in my chair once again and took a deep breath. I certainly had never wanted to see her again but it felt good to finally say what I needed to say to her. It felt like a boulder had been lifted off of my shoulders. Perhaps there had been.

By the time I packed everything up for the night, all I could think of was getting back to Bella. I loaded the last half of finals into my bag and headed back out to my car. The sun was just starting to set and the air was chilly. It was the beginning of December and as I drove through town, I noticed that more and more people had started putting Christmas lights up on their houses. I parked my car in the driveway, next to Bella's, and headed inside.

Bella was sitting on the floor, leaning against the couch. She had an electric throw over her legs and her laptop wide open on the coffee table, typing away. She looked up at me as I shut the door and smiled. A beautiful, sensual smile that she didn't even realize she had. I set my bag down behind the door and shrugged off my jacket, hanging it up and going over to Bella. I laid down on the couch behind her, leaning around her for a kiss.

"How was school?" I asked. "Book fair go ok?"

"It was…" Bella trailed off as she smiled, "…chaotic but incredible. To see all those kids get excited about books, it made me smile."

"I bet," I said, quietly.

"How was your day?" she asked, twisting around and looking at me. "Did you get your finals graded?"

"Almost half," I chuckled. "Part of me felt like I had really taught these kids something and then the other part wanted to smack them for the dump answers they gave."

"Don't go smacking them," giggled Bella, smiling widely. As much as I hated to, I knew I had to tell her about Jessica. Honestly was too important to both of us.

"Jessica came to see me," I said. Just as I knew it would, Bella's smile dropped. "Bella-"

"What did she want?" asked Bella, fear creping up in her voice.

"You know what she wanted," I said, quietly. Bella nodded her head and turned away from me. "You know that I am never leaving you."

"I do," she murmured, quietly.

"You know that I love you and only you, right?" I asked, desperate for her to confirm that I loved her.

"Of course, I do, Edward," sighed Bella, looking back at me. "But I hate that bitch and I don't want her fake tits anywhere near you. She's clearly not over you."

"But I am so over her," I smiled. "Bella, you are all the woman I want or need."

"I know," she murmured again. "I'm telling myself that you really mean it, too."

"I do," I said, quietly.

"What sounds good for dinner?" asked Bella, pushing the blanket off of her legs and standing up.

"Baby, talk to me," I begged, scrambling off the couch.

"I just…" Bella trailed off. "I don't like her being near you. She hurt you and I don't want her to do it again."

"She won't," I murmured, leaning in and pressing my lips to hers. "All I want is you and our baby. All I need is you and our baby."

"Tell me again," she whimpered.

"All I need is you and our baby," I whispered.

"Again," she cried, throwing her arms around my neck.

"Just you and our baby," I murmured. "You both are my life, Bella. You are me."

"I love you," she cried, pressing her face into my chest.

"I love you," I said, meaning every it more than I ever had.

"Show me," whimpered Bella, looking up at me. Tears swam in her eyes and I could see the need for reassurance that she was my life, that I only loved her. "Please, show me."

I didn't say anything as I swept my wife in my arms and carried her into our bedroom. Taking my time to remove our clothing, I let my hands tell her how much I needed to touch her. Laying her on the bed, I let my lips tell her how much I needed to kiss her, taste her. Making love to my wife slowly, I let my body show her how much I need to always be with her, loving her.


	45. Chapter 45

Forty-five

BPOV

I always thought that when you were pregnant, you were supposed to feel overheated all the time but, right now, I felt nothing but the freezing cold wind burling it's way though me. It was three days before Christmas and Texas had turned unseasonably cold. Of course, here in this part of Texas it wasn't usual for us to go from warm to freezing cold in the span of about an hour. I detested the cold. It was one more reminder of the hell that I left behind me in Chicago.

"Bella, love, you have to get out of bed," said Edward, sitting on the side and trying to pull the nice, warm blankets off of me.

"Too cold," I muttered, ducking under them.

"Baby, I know you're cold but we have to leave in the next twenty minutes if we are going to get to your doctor's appointment in time." I rolled my eyes, even though he couldn't see them. "Come on, love, the car is going to be nice and warm. I promise."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," I muttered.

Knowing that I had to climb out of the bed, I reluctantly threw the blankets off of me, shivering as I was hit by a blast of cold air. Edward rolled his eyes this time, muttering under his breath about it not being cold in here but I ignored him. I was so cold that my nipples could cut glass, now that was cold. I shuffled past Edward and headed into the bathroom, shutting the door behind me and trying to keep as much of the warm air inside as I could. I turned on the hot water, letting the steam fill the bathroom.

I was reluctant to take off my clothes but I couldn't very well shower with them on and there was no way in hell I could leave the house without a shower. As I took off my long sleeve t-shirt and sweatpants, I looked at my body in the mirror. Today, I was officially nineteen weeks along and I was definitely showing. Running my hands over my belly, I smiled. I loved feeling the roundness of my tummy, the bump that housed mine and Edward's baby. Just as I was running my hand over my belly, I felt it. Our baby kicked against my hand.

"Edward," I cried out.

The door to the bathroom was thrown open and my husband rushed in. "What?" he asked, frantically.

"The baby moved," I sobbed, falling into his arms.

"What?" he asked, quietly.

"The baby moved and I felt it," I cried.

"What did it feel like?" he asked, moving his hand down to my belly.

"Like little flutters," I whispered, smiling against his chest. "It was amazing."

"I bet," he murmured.

For several minutes, Edward and I stood there, waiting for our baby to move again. I wanted Edward to feel it, to know just what it felt like, but our baby was being stubborn and didn't kick again. After a few minutes, Edward leaned down and kissed my forehead, whispering that he loved me and left me alone. I could tell it bothered him that he didn't get to feel our baby move. I turned and climbed into the shower, letting the warm water wash over me.

By the time I got out of the shower and got dressed, I wasn't nearly as cold as I had been. I smiled to myself as I pulled on the dark maternity jeans that Alice had insisted that I needed last week, and a coral sweater that clung to my body, showing off my belly. I loved it. Once I had my shoes on, I made my way out to the living room. Edward as standing in front of the window, one hand on his hip and one hand on the window, watching at the bitter cold wind shook the trees.

The last couple of weeks have been amazing. I felt like a silly, love sick girl but I was so in love with Edward. Every morning I woke up, thankful that he was the one holding me, holding our baby. I'll admit to letting my imagination getting the best of me and expecting Jessica to come back after Edward. There was no way that he wanted her, I knew this, but every night I found myself laying in our bed, watching Edward sleep and praying that I would never lose him. I would never be able to handle losing him.

Pushing all those thoughts out of my head, I moved over, wrapping my arms around him and laying my head on his back. Rather than hearing him, I felt Edward sigh as he moved his hand from his hip and laid it on top of mine.

"Warm?" he asked, quietly.

"For now," I giggled, weaving my fingers with his. "Are you ok?"

"I've never been better," he murmured turning in my arms and bringing my hand up to his lips. "We had better go."

"Ok," I sighed.

Edward and I pulled on our jackets and ran out to the car. Well, I ran as much as I could with a protruding belly. Edward had already come out and started the car so when I climbed in, it was already toasty warm. Just one more reason why I was so in love with him. Once Edward was in the car, we headed out onto the highway and started our trip to Amarillo.

"I was thinking we could have lunch at that little diner down on Western," said Edward. He was smiling as he looked over at me. "They have great cheesecake."

"I could handle that," I smiled, rubbing my belly. "Do this this little fella would?"

"I think she would," smirked Edward. I shook my head.

"Boy."

"Girl," he laughed.

"Boy," I insisted.

"Girl," he repeated. "Want to bet on it?"

"What are the terms?" I asked. Edward pursed his lips as he looked back at the road.

"How about whoever wins, gets to pick the baby's middle name?" he asked, shifting his eyes back over at me.

"Ok, but no Cecil," I smirked.

"Ha, then no Courtney," snorted Edward.

"What's wrong with Courtney?" I asked.

"Nothing if you were born back in eighty-eight," said Edward. "I was thinking Ursula."

"What?" I nearly screeched. "We are not naming our daughter Ursula."

"Why not?" he asked.

"Um, because it was the name of the sea witch in The Little Mermaid." I rolled my eyes. "Honestly, Edward, how could you want to name a little girl after her?"

"What was I thinking," he muttered, dryly. "How about Giselle?"

"I kind of like that one," I murmured. "How about Melanie?"

"Be serious," he laughed.

"I was serious," I frowned. "I like that name."

"It's nice but I want our baby to have a name that stands out, makes her special," explained Edward. I couldn't help but smile as he talked dreamily of our baby.

"What about Miranda?" I asked. "That's pretty special."

"I like that," smiled Edward.

By the time Edward pulled up in front of my doctor's office, we had a very long list of possible girls names. Everything from Laney, Grace, Kendall, and Olivia, to Amelia, Claire, Meaghan, Allison, and Mari. It was going to be nearly impossible to pick a name, if were having a girl. I was still convinced that our little one was going to be a boy; a boy with Edward's eyes.

Edward slipped his arm around my waist, trying to shield me from the freezing wind as we rushed across the parking lot and headed into the building. We took the elevator up to the fifth floor and went over to Jane, who was sitting at the receptionist's desk. She had a huge smile on her face, as she always did. I couldn't help but wonder why she was always so happy.

"Hello, Bella," smiled Jane. "Aren't you just loving the cold?"

"Oh, yeah, can't get enough of it," I said, dryly. Jane laughed, throwing her head back.

"I grew up in California and everyone keeps telling me that you get used to it," said Jane, shaking her head, "but I'm not. Does it ever get easier?"

"No," admitted Edward, smiling. "You just learn to deal with it."

"If you say so," snorted Jane. "Dr. Davis will be with you in a little bit, Bella."

"Thanks, Jane," I smiled.

Edward and I settled on one of the sofas. He picked up a parenting magazine and lost himself in an article over the benefits of breastfeeding versus bottle-feeding. Lately, Edward had taken to reading as many parenting books and magazines as he could. I even found him online the other day, talking to some people in a parenting message board. It was sweet how excited he was about our baby.

I had been spending the last two weeks finishing my book and trying to get the nerve to send it to Angela, who had emailed me a couple of times and pushed for me to let her publish it. It's not that I didn't want to do it, I did, but giving her my book would be like giving up a piece of my soul, a part of who I was now. There were so many personal details that I needed to get out through my writing and I wasn't sure if I could handle for people to read them, even if they never knew it was me.

"Bella," called Heidi. I smiled as Edward and I stood up and met her at the door leading to the back. "How are you feeling?"

"Great," I said, following her back. "Besides cold, of course, but really, I've never felt better."

"The cold has been horrible," sighed Heidi, motioning for me to get on the scale, which I did. "You've gained five more pounds, giving you a total weight gain of….seventeen pounds so far."

"Ugh, thanks for the reminder," I muttered, moving my hand to my belly as I stepped off the scale.

"You're supposed to gain weight," said Heidi, gently.

"I know," I murmured, feeling embarrassed.

Edward placed his hand on my back as we followed Heidi down to one of the exam rooms. She made small talk with us while she took my temperature, and checked my blood pressure. Heidi told us Charlotte would be a few minutes before she shut the door, leaving us alone. As soon as the door was shut, Edward came around the table and slipped his arm around my waist, letting his fingers rest along my growing baby bump.

"I love feeling your tummy getting round like this," he whispered, bringing his lips down to my ear. "You are so sexy, it's taking all my control not to lock that door and have my way with you."

"Just turn off the lights," I muttered, bringing my hands up to rest on my stomach.

"Never," murmured Edward, moving his hands up and laying them on my belly. "I want to see all of you, every beautiful inch."

As we as sat there, hands laying on our child, he or she, kicked again. Once again it brought tears to my eyes and looked up at Edward. "Did you feel that?" I asked.

"No," he murmured, disappointedly.

"Oh," I said, quietly.

Before Edward could say anything the door to my exam room opened and we both looked back to see Charlotte coming in. As she always did, she had a beautiful smile on her face and a bounce in her step. It was both sweet and disgusting that she was always so happy. Edward leaned back but kept his hand on my belly as Charlotte closed the door behind her, moving over to the sink and washing her hands.

"How are we feeling?" she asked, looking back at me.

"Great," I said, smiling. "I have so much more energy now."

"Good," she laughed. "Give it about ten weeks and you will be feeling exhausted again."

"Hooray," I muttered.

Charlotte laughed again as she came over to me, laying her and on my shoulder. "Might as well get used to it now, the next twenty years of your life are going to be spent worrying about this little one."

"I know, I know," I smiled.

"Ok, let's see how this little one is doing and then we will do an ultrasound and see if he or she wants to tell us who he is."

Edward helped me lay back on the table and I pulled my shirt up, exposing my growing belly. Charlotte measured my belly, stating that I was measuring a couple of weeks ahead. She must have seen the concern on my face because she reassured me that it was, normal even, for women to be bigger when they were pregnant. Edward, of course, had my hand tightly in his and was silently reassuring me with every graze of his finger and every squeeze of his hand. Would there ever be a time when I didn't think the worst about everything?

"Ready to see your wee little one?" asked Charlotte, settling down on her stool next to me.

"Yes," I said, breathlessly.

Charlotte squirted the gel on my stomach and started our ultrasound. She spent several minutes measuring the baby and the fluids around him or her. As she was looking at the screen, her eyebrows raised and she bit back her laughter. Of course, all this did was elevate the level of my concern. Like I wasn't already worried enough, without adding that bit.

"Is he or she ok?" I asked, barely able to keep my voice from trembling. Charlotte smiled as she looked over at us.

"They're fine," she said reassuringly.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"One hundred percent," she smile. I nodded my head, even though I wasn't as confident as she was. "Are you sure that you want to know the sex of your baby?" asked Charlotte.

Edward brought our entwined hands up to his lips ands smiled. "Yes," we answered together.

"Ok." Charlotte smiled as she turned the screen so that we could see. "You're having a…"

She trailed off, smirking as she teased us. "Tell us!" I whined, loudly.

"A girl." She stopped and smiled. "And a boy."

"What?" I asked, nearly springing off the table. "How can the baby be both a boy and a girl?"

"You're having twins," laughed Charlotte, motioning toward the screen. "Baby B, the boy, has been a little shy, I think. He was hiding behind his sister."

"Oh wow," I breathed, looking up at Edward. He looked completely shocked, like he wasn't sure what to think. "Edward."

He looked down at me, smiling through his tears and letting his chin tremble. "Two babies."

"Two babies," I whispered, lifting my hand up and grazing his cheek. "Guess we both won the bet."


	46. Chapter 46

Forty-six

Today was Christmas. Edward and I were laying lazily on our bed, listening to the snow fall onto the roof, splattering against the windows. He was resting one of his hands on the left side of my belly while mine was on the right. The baby, I mean babies, had been moving since the grey light started spilling into our bedroom. Edward was desperately trying to feel them.

I'm pretty sure I was still in shock. There really was no other word that described the feeling that was inside of me as I reached down and rubbed my swollen belly. Yep, pure fucking shock.

"Anything?" I asked, quietly.

"No," he whispered, laying his head on my shoulder. "I guess the baby, I mean babies, don't want me to feel them."

"You will," I murmured, placing my hand over his. "We still awhile before they will be here."

"I know," he said, laughing softly. "I still can't believe we are having two babies."

"Me either," I said, nervously. "We need so much."

"Two of everything," he added. I nodded my head, even though he wasn't watching me. "Do we have them share a room?"

"What?" I asked. Edward leaned up on his elbow as he looked at me.

"Well, we are having a boy and a girl. Should they share a room? Or have their own?" he asked, seriously.

"I would say that since they are going to be tiny, that having them share would be a good idea," I smiled, rubbing my belly. "Besides, they're playing pretty nicely in here right now."

"You're right," sighed Edward. I gasped, mockingly and brought my hands up to my lips.

"Did you just admit that I was right?" I asked. "Did it hurt? Do you need an aspirin?"

"Hardy har har," he said, dryly, flopping onto his back. I smiled as I moved over, straddling him. Edward's hands automatically slid up my legs, under my nightgown, finally resting on my hips. "Bella."

"I love you, my darling husband," I murmured, placing my hands on his bare chest. Edward with no shirt on was like heaven on earth. "You are going to be an amazing father."

"You really think so?" he asked, quietly.

"I know so," I whispered. "They are going to love you." I smiled. "And have you wrapped around both of their fingers."

"No doubt," he laughed. "I love you, too, my beautiful wife. You are going to be the best mom. Just like Renee."

Tears filled my eyes. "Do you think she would have been excited about the babies?" I asked, sniffing them back. I did not want to cry on Christmas.

"Oh, yeah," replied Edward. "She would love them so much." I nodded my head, knowing he was right. "Come on, love. Let's go shower so we can head over to the see the family."

Edward slid off the bed, and held his hand out to me. Blushing, I placed my hand in his, letting him pull me off the bed. We made our way into the bathroom. Edward leaned over and turned on the water, letting it warm up as we stripped off our clothes. While it was a seemingly innocent act, we were saying so much.

He once again offered me his hand and helped me into the shower, sliding his arm around me as he climbed in behind me. As the warm water washed over me, Edward let his hands roam over my body, like he was memorizing every inch of me. He cupped my breasts, rolling my nipples between his fingers. I moaned, laying my head back on Edward's shoulder.

"Edward," I gasped, breathlessly.

"I love how full your boobs are," he murmured, letting his lips slide across my shoulder. "Your skin tastes fan-fucking-tastic."

"You're driving me insane," I moaned, pressing my ass into him.

I could feel his cock pressing into my ass, begging for my worship it. I wasn't about to say no. Turning in Edward's arms, I dropped to my knees in front of him and gripped his cock in my hand. Edward moaned, slamming his hand onto the wall, cursing under his breath. I looked up at him through my lashes as I leaned forward, sucking just the head of his delicious cock into my mouth.

"Baby, please," he begged. "Don't tease me." I smiled as I slid him into my mouth, letting him hit the back of my throat. Edward's head fell back as he groaned. "Jesus fucking christ."

Edward's cock was fucking amazing. Having in any part of my body, whether it be my mouth or my warm pussy, was astounding, stupendous, and every other adjective that I could think of. Edward was panting, shifting his hips slowly as he pushed himself into my mouth. He was clenching and unclenching his fists over and over, trying to put off his release but I wanted him to come. I slipped my hand in between his legs, fondling his balls.

"Bella," groaned Edward, pulling me off his cock and onto my feet.

I almost complained but the look in Edward's eyes stopped me; wild and completely turned on. He spun me around, pulled my back into his chest. Placing his hand on the base of my spine, he pushed gently, silently ordering me to bend over. I was more than willing to follow his silent command. Gripping my hips in his hands, Edward filled me, quickly.

"FUCK!" I cried, or screamed. I wasn't sure which as I was too absorbed in the filling of Edward's cock inside of me.

"Are you ok?" he asked, pulling back until he was almost out of me completely.

"Don't stop," I begged, slamming my hand on the wall in front of me. "Please, don't stop."

Edward pushed back into me, hissing from the angle in which he filled me. Words completely failed me and all I could do was moan like fucking porn star as Edward took my body, fucking me hard and fast. It felt amazing. Edward slid his hands from my hips around the my breasts, tugging on my nipples. I cried out again. My nipples were extra sensitive thanks to the pregnancy and Edward seemed to be loving that little detail.

My orgasm was fast approaching as Edward continued to take me hard. I slipped my hand down between my legs, finding my clit and rubbing it. He hissed as my fingers grazed him, causing him thrust harder, go deeper, and grunt out my name. Total turn on.

"Baby, let go," he urged, pinching my nipples.

"FUCK!" I screamed, slamming my hand on the shower wall as my walls clenched down and I came hard. "Oh, motherfucker."

"Bella," grunted Edward, stilling his hips as he found his release. "Merry Fucking Christmas, Baby."

"Merry Christmas, indeed," I murmured.

An hour later, Edward and I somehow managed to get out of the shower and get ready for Christmas with our family. I would have been just as content on staying home and spending all day in our bed, naked with him inside of me. My cheeks burned as I thought about Edward and I making love all day.

"What are you thinking about?" asked Edward, slipping his arms around my waist. "You're face is bright red."

"I was just thinking about staying home," I admitted as I turned in his arms. "With you, and our bed."

"Tempting," he murmured, leaning down and kissing me. "But Alice would be beating down our front door and I don't want to deal with the pixie's wrath."

"You're right," I grumbled.

Edward gasped and brought one of his hands to his mouth. "You just admitted I was right," he teased. "What has the world come to?"

"Such a smart-ass," I snorted, shaking my head. "Ok, let's go."

Edward laughed as he picked up the bag of presents we were taking over to his parents' house and led me out to my car. He put the gifts in the trunk while I climbed in behind the wheel, muttering as I had to scoot the seat back a little. Before long, I wouldn't be able to fit behind the wheel at all. As Edward climbed into the passenger seat, he had smirk on his face. The bastard knew this as well and was counting on getting to drive my car. I cursed him under my breath.

A few minutes later, and one fishtail on an icy road, I pulled my car up in front of Carlisle and Esme's house. Edward climbed out of the car and came around to help me out, holding on extra tight seeing at the road was very slick. Edward slid his arm around my waist and kept his other one on my arm as we headed up the front walkway. I wanted to tell him that I could walk on my own but I knew he was just being overly cautious because of our babies. Just one more reason I loved him.

When we walked into the house, we could hear everyone in the kitchen, talking together. Edward and I shrugged off our coats, gloves, and hats, and headed in there. Alice was the first to look up at us. She took one look a the black yoga pants and grey t-shirt I was wearing and scowled, just as I knew she would when I decided to go for comfort over style this morning.

"Don't Alice," I said, stopping her before she got started. "I'm comfortable."

"Fine," she said, dismissively. "I don't care anyway."

"Yeah, yeah," I snorted, rolling my eyes as I looked over at everyone. "Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas, Sweetheart," gushed Esme, making a beeline for me. Instead of hugging me, she placed her hands on my belly, leaning over so that she could kiss it. It was awkward. "Hello, Baby. Tell your mommy and daddy to tell us if you are a boy or a girl."

"Mom," sighed Edward.

"Don't mom me, Edward," she scolded, standing up and glaring at her son. "You and Bella have been keeping this information to yourselves for three days and I want to know."

"Three whole days, Mom?" asked Edward, teasing her. "How could we be so cruel as to make you wait three whole days?"

"I don't know," she said, shaking her head. "Clearly, I failed you as a mother."

"Oh, Esme," I laughed, hugging her. "You will find out soon enough."

"But I want to know now," she whined. Everyone else was laughing with us. Even Esme, who was trying very hard not to.

"Ok, ok, time for presents!" squealed Alice, jumping up.

"Wait!" I said, putting my hand up. "I want to give my dad his present in private. Please," I added.

"Oh, ok," she said, giving a look. I merely smiled at her. "I guess we can wait a few more minutes.

"Thank you," I beamed.

Alice sat back down next to Jasper, who slipped his arm around her shoulder. Charlie gave me a look, like he was scared I was going to share some porn with him or something. Edward ran back out to the car and grabbed out gifts, setting them under the tree. He handed me Charlie's gift before kissing me and going back into the kitchen. When we decided to wait until today to share our news about the babies, Edward and I agreed to tell each set of parents on our own, in our own special way.

I moved over, kneeling on the floor in front of my father and placed his gift in his hand. "Merry Christmas, Daddy."

"Merry Christmas, Honey," smiled Charlie. He ripped off the silver and red Christmas paper and dropped it on the floor. Pulling the lid off the box, he gasped and pulled out what was inside. Charlie sat there, staring at the small silver picture frame in his hands. As he looked up at me, his chin trembled and a tear fell from his eye. "Is this what I think it is?" he asked.

I smiled as I shifted over and leaned up to him, leaning my head on my father's shoulder. "Yes, these are your grandbabies, Daddy," I murmured. "Aren't they beautiful? A girl and a boy."

"Of course they are," he said, gruffly. "They look like you."

"Are you saying that I look like an out of focus blob?" I asked, raising my eyebrow at my father. His eyes grew wide, like he just realized what he said.

"No," he gasped. "I meant that you are beautiful, Honey."

"I believe you, Daddy," I laughed, sitting back on my feet. Charlie smiled as he looked back down at the picture in his hands.

"Twins." He shook his head. "You mom would have been thrilled to be getting two babies."

"You think so?" I asked. Charlie snorted, and pulled me up onto the couch next to him.

"Oh, yeah," he chuckled. "She wanted a house full of babies."

"She told me," I murmured, laying my head back on his shoulder. My father slipped his arm around my waist, holding me as tight as he could. "I'm kind of scared."

"What are you scared of?" asked Charlie.

"That I won't be a good mom," I mumbled. "That I'll forget to feed them, or change their diapers. What if they never learn to walk or read? What if I hurt them? Dad, I can't do this!"

I was panicking.

"Calm down, Honey," he said, leaning back on the couch, pulling me back with him. "Now, it's normal for you to be scared and worried, but none of that is going to happen."

"How can you be so sure?" I asked.

"Because I know you, Bella," he laughed. "Do you remember when you were around six and we got that baby lamb?"

"Cotton ball," I smiled.

"Yeah, Cotton ball," laughed Charlie, shaking his head. "From the moment we brought that little lamb into the house, you momma'd that little fella until he was bigger than you."

"But we are talking about two babies, Daddy, not a little lamb," I sighed.

"I know," he said, quickly. "But you will be the best mom around. I'll go as far as saying that you'll be even better than your own mom."

"I don't think that's possible," I murmured. "Mom was pretty amazing."

"She really was," agreed Charlie.

My father and I were distracted by Rose's very loud squeal from the kitchen. Charlie was on his feet immediately. I tried to be but I wasn't moving as quickly as I normally did. He reached down, grabbing my hand and pulling me up, smiling but not making fun of me. We rushed into the kitchen and found Rose sobbing in Emmett's arms, who had fallen to his knees and was holding her.

For a moment I was scared that he had said something or inadvertently done something to upset Rose but the smiles and tears from Esme and Alice made me think other wise. Carlisle had his arms around his wife, holding her into his body as they smiled down at their son and Rose. Alice was facing Jasper, smiling through her own tears. Edward was standing behind Emmett, watching them. He, too, had a huge smile on his face.

"What the hell is going on here?" I half-way yelled, looking from the two people on the floor and up to my father. Charlie had his hand covering his mouth, clearly trying to hide his own smile. The jerk knew what was going on and hadn't told me.

"He asked me to marry him," cried Rose, standing up. She thrust her left hand in my face, showing off the large, diamond solitaire engagement ring resting on her ring finger. I grabbed her hand, looking from the ring over to Emmett, who had stood up and was beaming. Emmett Cullen was actually getting married.

"Well, fuck me raw, hell must of froze over," I muttered, causing everyone to burst out laughing. I pulled Rose into my arms, hugging her as tightly as I could. "I'm so happy for you, Rose."

"Thank you, Bella," she cried. "I never would have gotten here without you."

"Oh, Rose," I murmured, shaking my head. "If you hadn't told me to get my head out of my ass and see that I wasn't…" I trailed off, not wanting to think about that night. "I'm just really happy for you."

"Thanks, Bella," she whispered.

I went over to Emmett, who was still smiling like a fool. "Wow, Em, such a big step." I commented.

"I love her, Bella," he said, seriously. "I knew the moment I saw her at the square that I was going to marry her. I've been waiting for her all my life."

Emmett was so sincere that he brought my to tears. There was so much that I wanted to say to him, but all I could do in this moment was fall into his arms, holding onto him. "What the hell?" he asked.

"So…sweet," I cried, hiccupping. "Never…knew…you…you were so…s….sw….sweet."

"Yeah, I'm a big marshmallow," He said with uncertainty.

"She's just a little emotional," whispered Edward, pulling me away from Emmett and into his own arms.

As he lead me out of the room, I heard Charlie tell Emmett that he had better take care of his daughter or else. Edward led me over to the couch, sitting down with me in his lap. I laid my head on his shoulder, letting my tears dry up as I brought my hand up to his face, needing to be close to him, but unable to get close enough.

"When I found myself in the hospital that night," I whispered. "I wanted to die. I hated myself for losing the baby and letting him get the best of me. I hated myself for fighting back and not just letting him kill me."

"I'm glad you fought back," he murmured, running his fingers through my hair.

"Me too," I said, softly. "Em's going to be a good husband to her."

"She'll be a good wife for him," added Edward, sliding his hand up to my tummy. As Edward and I were sitting on his parents' couch, holding onto each other, the babies in my tummy started pushing against his hand. Edward gasped as he looked right into my eyes and smiled. "I felt them."

"It's amazing, isn't it?" I asked, laying my hand over his. "This is our family, Edward."

"Our family," he murmured, ducking his head into my neck. "Our perfect little family."


	47. Chapter 47

Forty-seven

EPOV

Walking back into the kitchen, after getting our gifts from her car, I couldn't help but smile. After we found out that we were having two babies, and not one, Bella and I had gone to eat lunch at The Plaza, knowing that it was her favorite restaurant in Amarillo. It was too much to absorb and I don't think either of us was sure on how to react to the news. I mean, there were two babies inside of Bella's stomach. It was just…wow.

"You're hiding something," said Esme, looping her arm in with mine. "Besides the sex of my grandbaby, that is."

"Don't know what you are talking about, Mother," I said, not meeting her eyes. If I did, I would blurt out everything and that is not how I wanted my mother to find out about the babies. "Is there any juice?"

"Yes, apple, grape, and orange juice, as there always is," she said. "I'll get you some if you tell me if we are getting a boy or a girl."

"Mother," I sighed, shaking my head. "I'll get it myself."

"You're not being very nice, Edward Anthony," she pouted, walking over and sitting at the table. Carlisle, who was trying very hard not to laugh at her, took her hand in his.

"Esme, darling, we will find out soon enough," he said, smiling at her. "Have some patience, my dear."

"Don't want to," she muttered.

Jasper, Alice, and Rose were laughing as they watched my mother pout. I can't tell you how many times as a child I had begged her to tell me what she got me for Christmas or my birthday but she never told me. Ever. This seemed like the perfect payback, maker her sweat it out a bit. Besides, I knew it was important to Bella that she told Charlie first. The two of them had been working so hard on rebuilding their relationship.

Emmett seemed to be the only one who wasn't laughing with my mother, or at her for that matter. He was sitting in his seat, nervously tapping his fingers on the table. I had never seem my brother so jittery before. Before I could ask him what was wrong, he stood up and started pacing, causing everyone else to look over at him, too.

"Emmett, what's wrong?" asked Rose, standing up. Emmett stopped and looked over at her. Just staring at her. "Emmett."

"I love you," he said, seriously. Rose smiled and blushed, something that was not like her at all.

"I love you, too," she murmured

"I've been waiting for you for so long, Rosie," he said, emotionally. Rose smiled as she came over to him, bringing her hand up to his face. Emmett's eyes closed as he leaned into her hand. We were all watching, even though they seemed to be oblivious to that fact that we were here. "I never thought that I would meet someone who makes me feel the way you do, Baby."

"Me either," whispered Rose. "I didn't even realize I was looking for you."

Emmett opened his eyes and smiled as he dropped down to his knee. Rose gasped as he took her left hand in his and pulled out a small, black box. The room was a quiet as it could be as we all waited for Emmett to do what he was planning. Who knew Emmett would ever make this leap?

"Baby, I want to spend the rest of my life holding you in my arms. I want to wake up every morning knowing that you are mine. I want to have babies, lots of babies," he said, letting a tear travel down his face. Rose brought her free hand up to her lips, trying to stop herself from sobbing. "You're the only woman I have ever loved, Rose. I will only ever love you. Will you marry me?"

"YES!" squealed Rose, falling into Emmet's arms and letting him slide the ring onto her finger.

As Rose and Emmett held each other, Charlie and Bella came rushing into the kitchen, demanding to know what had happened. I stood back and watched as Rose showed Bella her ring. Bella, being the amazingly, sarcastic woman that she was, made the comment about hell freezing over. While we all laughed with her, I knew that she was extremely happy for Rose and Emmett.

Bella got emotional with Emmett, who clearly wasn't sure how to deal with it. I smiled as I led Bella into the living room, settling her on my lap and holding her. Hearing her talk about wanting to give up, about being pissed that she fought back, was hard to listen to and hurt but I was glad that she fought for her life, and I told her so. It was while I was holding her on my lap, my hand resting on her baby bump, when I felt it. The small, fluttering as the babies moved inside of her. I gasped as I looked up at Bella, smiling bigger than I ever had.

"I felt them," I murmured.

"It's amazing, isn't it?" she asked, covering my hand with hers. "This is our family, Edward."

"Our family," I murmured, tucking my head into her neck as I felt myself getting emotional. "Our perfect little family."

"Oh, Edward," cried Bella, wrapping her arms around me.

Bella and I sat there, wrapped in each other's arms, until we heard someone clear their throat behind us. Pulling away from each other, we saw Emmett standing there, nervously. I could tell this was new terrain for him.

"I don't mean to interrupt, but everyone else is about ready to come in here and demand some answers," he said, shifting from one foot to the other. "I'm trying to hold them off but you know how they are."

"It's fine," smiled Bella. She looked down at me. "Want me to send them in?"

"Yes, please," I said, softly.

Bella was still smiling as she walked over and hooked her arm in with Emmett's, pulling him back into the kitchen. I stood up and walked over to our pile of gifts that were sitting next to the tree, pulling out the gifts to my parents. I turned as they came into the room, looking both excited and nervous about why I wanted to give them our gifts in private. Just as Bella had needed that time with her father, I needed that time with my parents.

"Here," I said, handing them each a box. Esme took hers and settled on the couch with Carlisle, next to her.

"What is it?" she asked, shaking the box. Like that was going to tell her.

"The answer," I smiled.

Esme tore the paper off the box and tossed it onto the ground. Pulling off the top of the box, she lifted the small item inside, smiling as she did. "A girl," she smiled, lifting the pink t-shirt that said 'Grandma's little angel.' "You and Bella are having a girl."

"Yes," I confirmed. Looking over at my father, I said, "Open yours."

"Ok," he said, looking a little confused on why he was getting a gift, too. Carlisle carefully pulled the wrapping paper off the box, driving my mother insane as he did so. He laid the paper on the couch next him and pulled the top off his box. He shot his eyes up to me as he saw the small blue t-shirt that said 'Grandpa loves me more.' "A boy?" he asked. "You and Bella are having a boy."

"Yes." I smiled as they looked at each other, trying to put the pieces together.

"How can the baby be a girl and a boy?" asked Esme. "Does it have both parts?"

"No," I laughed, settling on the edge of the coffee table. "Bella and I are having a baby girl and a baby boy."

"You mean…" Esme trailed off as she smiled.

"Twins," finished Carlisle, grinning like a fool. "My boy is having twins."

"Yes, we are," I said, smiling.

"Oh, Edward," whimpered Esme. "Two babies."

"I know," I murmured. "We're still in shock."

"Congratulations, son," said Carlisle, hugging me. "This is just…amazing."

"Thanks, Dad," I said, quietly. "For…well, for everything."

"What else?" he asked, pulling back.

I shook my head and took a deep breath. "When I came back from Austin, I wasn't in a good place. I know that I didn't make it easy on you both. I just… I needed some time to deal with the fact that you were right about her," I explained. "Neither of you pushed for details. You gave me what I needed and I can't thank you enough."

"Oh, my sweet boy," murmured Esme, bringing her hand up to my face. "We were so worried about you."

"I know," I said.

"We didn't know how to help you," she added.

"I didn't know either." And I didn't. It wasn't until I found Bella sitting in the sand out at the lake that I felt anything. "It was Bella."

"What was Bella?" asked Carlisle.

"She was all I needed," I said, getting choked up. "She thinks I was the one who saved her or whatever but it was all her. She's my everything,"

"Oh, Edward," murmured Esme, wiping the tears off as they fell.

"I thought I knew what love was until I found her again." I closed my eyes. "She was lost and scared, but so was I. She fought so hard. She gave me the strength to help her and I love her so much."

"I love you, too," murmured Bella. I opened my eyes and saw her standing in the doorway to the kitchen with everyone behind her. I crossed the room, pulling her into my arms, kissing her softly on the lips, and just loving her. "Oh, Edward, if you hadn't been there for me…"

"Me too," I whispered, knowing exactly what she was saying. "But we're together and having babies. And-"

"Wait, babies?" squealed Alice. Bella and I smiled as we looked over at my little sister. "What do you mean babies?"

"Edward and I are having twins," smiled Bella. Rose's mouth fell open. Emmett and Jasper both looked down at Bella's tummy, like they were trying to figure out how she was holding two babies in there. Behind them all, stood Charlie, huge smile on his face.

"A beautiful baby girl, just like Bella," I added.

"And a handsome baby boy, just like Edward."

Alice's eyes glazed over and I knew just what she was thinking. "Ali, no going crazy," I said, snapping my fingers at her. She opened her mouth to respond but I held my hand up, stopping her. "No, Alice. I'm serious. You can buy for them but remember that they aren't going to need ten shirts that are exactly the same but just different colors."

"Fine, but I want to throw the baby shower," she said, crossing her arms in front of her. "Deal?"

"Nothing too big," warned Bella. Alice rolled her eyes. "I'm serious, Alice. Please, nothing insane."

"Ok, ok," she sighed, moving over to the couches. "Gees, try to do something nice and everyone thinks you are going to go crazy."

"Oh, Alice, we don't think, we know," I laughed.

"Whatever," muttered Alice.

Rose crossed the room, pulling Bella over with her. They sat on the couch next to Alice, giggling about babies, and clothes, and engagements. It was great to see Bella laughing so freely now. Every once in awhile I would see a shadow of doubt creep up on her face but I was doing everything I could to make it better for her, just as she was doing for me. Jasper and Emmett came over and stood next to me, watching as our women bonded.

"Two babies, huh?" asked Emmett.

"Yep," I said, nodding my head.

"Wow," snorted Emmett. I looked up at him. "You're going to be pretty busy."

"I can't wait," I admitted.

"Congratulations, Edward," he said, placing his hand on my shoulder. "If anyone deserves to be happy, it's you and Bella."

"And you and Rose," I added. "You're getting married, Man."

"Figured we were ready." Emmett shrugged his shoulders. "Rosie deserves everything, Edward. I am going to make sure she gets it."

Emmett walked over and settled down on the hearth to the fireplace, watching as his fiancée giggled with my wife. "Who would have thought that Emmett would ever settle down," mused Jasper.

"Not me," I admitted. "But I guess when you find the one, you do what nobody expected."

"True," said Jasper. "You know Alice already has about a years worth of clothes bought, don't you?"

"I figured as much." Looking over at him, I smiled. "It's what Alice does."

"It's cause she loves you all so much," he said, seriously. "She's trying in her own little way to help make everything easier for you. Just like after the fire."

"I know," I said, nodding my head. "I wouldn't have her any other way, Jasper."

"Me either," he snorted, looking over at them. "She was really worried about you."

"I know," I said, again.

"She thought you didn't need her," added Jasper. "That Bella didn't need her, that nobody needed her. That's why she pushes herself on you all like she does. She's afraid that if she doesn't show you that she loves you, that you won't know."

"How could we not?" I muttered, shaking my head. "Alice is so selfless."

"She is," smiled Jasper, placing his hand on my shoulder. "It's just one of the things I love the most about her."

Jasper moved over and lifted Alice off the couch, causing her to squeal and throw her arms around him. He leaned in and discretely kissed her. Alice sighed and melted into his embrace. I had always known that Jasper and Alice loved each other but it wasn't until this moment that I really saw how much they were in love with each other. Every gesture, touch, murmured word. They were like me and Bella, always telling each other how they felt, even if they weren't saying anything.

"Time for presents!" squealed Alice, jumping out of Jasper's arms.

We all laughed with her and settled on the couches, while she started passing out presents. As much as Alice loved receiving gifts, she really did enjoy giving them more. Bella sat next to me on the couch, hands resting on her belly, as we watched out family opening their gifts. She reached over and grabbed my hand, placing it on her belly. Our babies pressed against my hand, and I smiled. Our perfect little family.

"Aren't you two going to open your gifts?" asked Esme.

"Of course we are," smiled Bella.

"Yeah, just watching everyone else first," I added.

By the time we were ready to head home, both Bella and I were exhausted. We had received so much that it took me three trips out to the car to load everything up. Once I had the car running, hoping it would be warm before Bella got in, I headed back into the house. Bella was wrapped in my mother's arms, while Esme whispered into her ear. It was beautiful to see how close my mother and my wife were.

"You got everything?" asked Charlie.

"Just waiting for her," I smiled, gesturing to Bella.

Charlie chuckled. "You might be waiting a while. Your mother has been talking to the babies. Something along the lines of a drum set and some make-up."

"Oh lord, help us all," I groaned. Bella laughed as Esme leaned down and kissed her belly. To anyone else, that would be weird but not to my mother.

"Be careful," he said, patting me on the back. "The roads are icy and you have precious cargo."

"I know," I said, heeding more than his warning about the roads. Bella came up to me. I leaned in and kissed her cheek. "Are you ready, love?"

"Hmm," she murmured, laying her head on my chest. "More than ready." Bella leaned over and kissed Charlie's cheek. "Night, Daddy."

"Night, Honey," he said, quietly. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

I kept my arm around Bella's waist as we made our way down to the car. The air was cold and the walkway slippery. The last thing we needed was for Bella to fall. She slipped her keys into my hand, murmured something about being too cold to drive. I helped her into the passenger seat and carefully made my way around the car to the drivers seat. Bella snuggled into her seat, pulling her seatbelt on, and smiling.

"Let's got home," she whispered. I picked up her hand and brought it up to my lips.

"Home sounds perfect."


	48. Chapter 48

Forty-eight

BPOV

I sat at a small table in Starbucks, nervously tapping my nails on the table and eyeing one of the chocolate cupcakes sitting in the deli window. Bringing my hand up to my swollen belly, I sighed. I really did not need the cupcake but it was calling out to me, begging my to devour it. Shifting my eyes away from the temptation, I looked down at the manuscript that was sitting in front of me. All 456 pages of it, bound and ready for me to hand off to Angela, if I could get the balls to give it up.

It was now the middle of February and I was currently in my twenty-sixth week of my pregnancy, even though I looked closer to thirty. My belly was no longer hideable. Was hideable a word? I didn't think so but at this point I didn't care. The point was, I had officially bloomed, popped, blossomed, whatever word you wanted to use. I could no longer wear my normal clothes, or any of Edward's. I had been reduced to wearing maternity clothes and, while that wasn't necessarily a bad thing, the fact that Alice had purchased all of my maternity clothes, kind of was. They weren't nearly as comfortable as I wanted but I knew she needed to do this and, for now anyway, I would let her win this battle, for I would win the war.

"Great, now even my thoughts are loony," I muttered.

"Are you talking to yourself?" asked Angela, from behind me. "I heard only the crazies do that."

I turned in my seat and tried to get up but she held up her hand. "Don't, that looks painful," she laughed. She stepped up and hugged me, ignoring the large mass that was poking her in the boobs. She pulled away, smiling. "Wow, look at you all happy and preggy."

"I know," I agreed. She set her messenger bag down on the table and started rummaging through it.

"I need coffee, like really bad," she said, pulling out her wallet. "Can I get you anything?"

I bit my lip as I looked over at the cupcake. "You see that big, fluffy chocolate cupcake?" I asked.

"Yes," she said, nodding her head as she followed my eyes.

"I really don't need it," I sighed, placing my hand back on my belly.

"But you want it bad, don't you?" she asked, cocking an eyebrow at me.

"So bad," I sighed, looking back at her.

"I won't tell," she whispered, smiling wickedly.

"You're the best friend a prego could have," I laughed.

Angela laughed as she headed up to the counter. She ordered her coffee and pointed to the biggest cupcake. I nearly burst into tears when she placed it on the table in front of me. Taking my time to peel off the paper, I took a big bite, moaning as my taste buds exploded with chocolaty goodness. Angela just sat across from me, sipping on her Venti Caramel Macchiato and trying very hard not to laugh as I practically make love to my food. Oh, Edward with chocolate all over him, now that sounded good.

"I don't think I want to know what you are thinking," giggled Angela. I blushed as I licked my fingers clean.

"No, you don't," I admitted. Angela laughed again, setting her cup on the table. She looked over at my manuscript.

"Is that it?" she asked. I nodded my head, placing my hand on it. "You could have just emailed it to me."

"I know," I muttered, completely embarrassed.

Angela leaned back in her seat. "Are you sure you want to give me that?" she asked, nodding toward my life's work.

"No, not at all," I said, breathlessly. Angela just sat there. "You know that this is more than just a book, right?"

"I do," she said, quietly.

I nodded. "It's my story." I brought my hands up to my face as I felt the tears start to build. "Sorry, my hormones are all out of whack."

"It's fine." Angela slid a napkin across the table.

"Thank you," I whispered, picking it up and wiping my eyes. Looking back at my book, I said, "There are things in here that I had a very hard time with sharing with anyone."

"Except for Edward." It was the true. A simple truth.

"Except for Edward," I admitted. "But it was hard to tell him everything my ex had done to me, Angela. Everything I let him do to me."

"Bella, if you aren't ready, you don't have to give it to me," she said, quietly.

"I do, though," I murmured. Sliding my hand off the book and down to my bursting belly. "My babies will be here before we know it. I have to let go of all the… I don't know, worry and fear that this is all just a dream."

"Honey, you know that Edward loves you, right?" asked Angela, leaning forward.

"Of course I do, Angela," I smiled. "But I thought Mike loved me. It was foolish to think that what he called love was really love."

"Edward isn't like Mike," she said, quietly.

"No, he's not," I agreed. "And that's why I have to let you take my book."

"I don't understand."

"As long as I hold on to this," I explained, placing my hand back on my manuscript, "then I am never going to be completely free of the hell that I went through. It's always going to sit there, mocking me, betraying me, pulling pieces of me away from those I love. By letting it go, by letting you publish it, I'm making the choice that he can't hurt me ever again."

Angela smiled as she leaned back in her seat. "That's a huge step, Bella."

"It's a small step," I said, disagreeing with her. Placing my hands on my belly. "This is a huge step. Letting go of all of it, just to be a good mom, is a huge step."

"I can't believe you are going to have two babies," she said, smiling. "Any names yet?"

"Yes," I giggled. "But we aren't telling."

"That is so mean," she whined, falling back in her seat again.

"I know, but Edward and I want something to be a surprise when they come," I laughed.

"You really love him, don't you?" asked Angela.

"Remember when we were little and we would watch all those silly Disney movies?" I asked.

"Yeah, like Cinderella," she said, nodding her head.

"Yeah," I murmured. "Edward's my prince charming. He would deny it, tell you that I saved him and all this bullshit but the truth is, if he hadn't loved me, Angela…" I trailed off as I shook my head. "He's my everything. Our babies are going to have the most amazing daddy." Angela's smile grew and I realized just how silly I sounded. "I sound like a crazy person, don't I?"

"A little," she admitted. "Or someone in love."

I rolled my eyes as I blushed. "So when are you and Ben going to tie the knot?" I asked, changing the subject.

"Um, never," she said, shaking her head.

"Oh, come on, Angela, don't you want to get married?" I asked.

"No," she said, cringing. "I mean, it's just not for me and Ben. Besides, we don't need a piece of paper to tell us that we will be spending the rest of our lives together."

"Yeah, you've been together what, twelve years now?" I asked. "What's a silly piece of paper or shiny diamond ring going to prove?"

"I know it sounds pretty strange, Bella," smiled Angela, "but it's what's works for me and Ben."

"I'm not judging you," I said, shifting in my seat. "If you are happy, then I am happy."

"By the looks of that belly, you are very happy," she teased.

"Ugh, don't make fat jokes," I whined.

"I'm not. I think you look adorable," she laughed. "And I'm very happy for you and Edward, Bella. You both deserve all the happiness in the world."

"That was so…mushy," I giggled, standing up. I picked up my manuscript and handed it to her. "Angela, thank you for everything."

"Thank me when I make you a best seller," she smiled, pulling it out of my hand. She came around the table and hugged me. "I'm proud of you for taking this gigantic step."

"Baby step," I murmured.

She shook her head as she turned and picked up her messenger bag, slinging it up on her shoulder. "No such steps when making a decision like this, Honey. I'll be in touch, ok?"

"Ok," I said, quietly.

I watched as Angela walked out to her rental car and drove off with my manuscript in her arms. It was surreal and bittersweet to watch her taking a part of me with her. My book had been my therapist, my voice in the darkness, my sanctuary for so long, that it felt odd to not have it with me anymore. As I stood there, however, my babies kicked, reminding me that they were worth letting go and moving forward.

A little over an hour later, I pulled my car up into the driveway of mine and Edward's house. When I walked inside, I found him, Emmett, and Jasper sitting on the floor of the living room, surrounded by the parts to the two baby cribs we had ordered. Rose and Alice were sitting on the couch behind them, laughing while they argued about which piece went next.

"Um, what's going on?" I asked. Edward looked up at me, clearly annoyed.

"We are trying to put together these fucking cribs," he said, shortly. "But they are fucking impossible!"

"Why in the hell did you pick cribs that were this hard?" spat Emmett. I looked over at Edward, raising an eyebrow. He, however, refused to meet my eye.

"Did you tell him that I picked these out, Edward?" I asked, kicking my shoes off, sighing with relief. I hated shoes.

"No," he muttered.

"You fucking liar," belted Emmett, pointing at him. "You said you wanted to get one of those easy ones that comes all together but that Bella here insisted on these."

"Edward Anthony," I gasped, walking over and sitting next to Alice and Rose, with a loud groan. "God, I love this couch."

"Why don't you marry it," snickered Emmett.

"How fucking old are you, Emmett?" I laughed, shaking my head.

"Old enough to know better, young enough not to care," he said, winking at me. I shook my head and looked over at Rose.

"Are you sure you want to marry him?" I asked.

"Yeah, for some reason I find his idiocy sexy," she said, fondly.

"That's right, baby," he smirked, leaning back and winking at her.

"Ugh, that's just wrong," grumbled Edward, throwing a bar from the crib at him, smacking Emmett right in the head..

"Ouch, you fucker," whined Emmett, rubbing his head. "Bella, Edward hit me."

"And?" I asked, leaning back. "Am I supposed to care?"

"Nobody loves me," muttered Emmett, throwing the bar back at Edward. However, my husband was quicker than Emmett and caught it before it hit him.

"Good catch, Baby," I cheered.

"Thanks, Love," winked Edward.

"Ok, ok, enough," said Jasper. "Let's get these cribs put together already."

"It would help if we had instructions that weren't in Japanese or Korean," snipped Edward. I bit my lip as I gestured to the paper sitting behind him.

"You mean like those instructions?" I asked. Edward followed my finger and narrowed his eyes, picking them up.

"Yes," he muttered, embarrassedly.

"You mean they were right behind you the whole time!" groused Jasper, falling back onto this back. "Fuck my life."

By the time Edward, Emmett, and Jasper got both cribs put together, they had cursed everything and anything. Alice, Rose, and I tried to be supportive but after about an hour of us laughing every time they smacked one of their thumbs or pinched themselves, they ordered us to get out of the living room. So we did the next best thing. The three of us climbed on to mine and Edward's bed and watched a movie while they worked on the cribs.

Emmett and Jasper helped Edward get them into what used to be our guest room and left with Alice and Rose, making them promise to kiss their injuries. I didn't want to think about what that really meant. I climbed off the bed and headed down the hallway to our new nursery. Edward had spent three days painting the room beige with white trim. He told me that since we were having one of each it was a nice neutral color for them. I didn't disagree. Sitting against two of the walls were the dark oak cribs they had been working on. Edward was placing the two new mattresses inside of them.

"They look great," I commented.

Edward turned and looked at me. "Thanks," he chuckled. "Can you believe that in around ten weeks we will have babies in here?" I shook my head, bringing my hand up to my belly. "Are you ok? After your meeting with Angela?"

"I guess," I said, moving over and standing behind him, slipping my arms around his waist and laying my head on his back. "I'm scared."

"What are you scared of?" he asked, turning and slipping his arms under mine.

"That people will judge me," I whispered. "That they will blame me for staying so long."

"Screw them if they do," he said, leaning down and kissing the side of my neck.

"That easy, huh?" I asked, tilting my head to give him more access. "Fuck, Edward," I gasped.

"That easy, Baby," he murmured, letting his lips brush across my ear.

"It was hard to let her take it," I whispered.

"But you did, and that was huge," he murmured.

"So I've heard," I giggled, kissing him. "I'm going to go take a hot shower."

"Ok, I'll be in there in a minute."

I left Edward standing in the middle of the babies room and headed down the hallway to our bedroom, stripping my clothes off as I walked into the bathroom. Bending over, I turned the water on and felt a gush as fluid poured out of me. Springing back up, I brought my hand down between my legs.

"EDWARD!" I screamed, leaning against the wall. A loud crash came as Edward came running in to the bathroom panic spreading on his face.

"What?" he asked, looking all around.

"My water broke."


	49. Chapter 49

Forty-nine

In a heart beat, Edward had me in his arms and was carrying me out to the car, after I reminded him that I was naked, of course. He threw one of my shirts on me and a pair of sweats but had my ass in the passenger seat of his car, with his cell phone up to his ear two minutes later.

"Charlie," he said, urgently. "Bella's water broke...I know she's only twenty-six weeks...yes...ok."

Edward hung up the phone, but had it open before I could question him. Honestly, I was too freaked out to ask him anything. It was too soon for the babies to come, and we both knew it. The odds that both babies would survive right now weren't high. Pain soared through me. I couldn't lose my babies, not now that everything in my life was good.

"I don't care, get me her goddamn home number but I need to talk to Dr. Davis now!" snarled Edward.

I reached over and touched his arm, partly because I needed him to calm down and partly because, I needed to touch him. He had always been my comfort when I was scared or angry. He still was and right now, he needed me to be that for him. As we pulled up to the city limits of Clarendon, my father's sheriff's truck pulled in front of us, blue and red lights flashing. Bringing my hand up to my lips, I blinked back my tears. My father was leading the way to the hospital.

"Charlotte, oh thank god," sighed Edward and I looked over at him. "Bella's water broke...yes, I'm sure...I didn't smell it. I'm not a sicko...Oh, well, there was a lot. I mean, a lot...we are on our way right now. We're almost to Ashtola so we should be there in like forty minutes...I know... I'm trying," he said, voice cracking. I took a ragged breath, trying to keep my composure. "Ok, hang on." Holding the phone out to me, he said, "She wants to talk to you."

My hand shook as I reached up and took the phone from him, bringing it up to my ear. "Charlotte," I whimpered.

"Bella, sweetie, I know you are scared," she said, calmly. "But I need you to be strong. We're going to be okay."

"It's too early," I wept.

"It is, you're right, but your babies are strong, and they are fighters," she said, encouragingly.

"You can't know that," I murmured.

"They have you for their mother," she said, quickly. "I'll be waiting for you and Edward in the ER."

Charlotte hung up before I could say anything else. I closed Edward's phone, dropping it into the middle console and placed my hands on my belly. I sure as hell hoped that my babies were fighters, because, right now, I needed them to be. Edward reached over and took my hand, bringing it to his lips and placed a gentle kiss on my knuckle, silently praying with me that everything was going to be okay and letting his tears fall.

Thirty-eight minutes later, and five phone calls from Charlie asking if I was ok, Edward pulled his car up outside the emergency room doors at Baptist St. Anthony's hospital in Amarillo. He was out of the car and over to me before I could undo my seat belt. Slipping his arms under my legs, and around my back, he gently lifted me out of the car. I slipped my arms around his neck, holding onto him as he carried me inside.

Just as she said she would be, Charlotte stood waiting for us just inside the doors with a wheelchair. Edward placed me in the seat as my father came rushing in with Carlisle and Esme after him. Behind Charlotte, stood a tall, very handsome man with kind blue eyes and a soft blond hair. He watched us, concern etched into every feature.

"Edward, follow me," ordered Charlotte.

Edward didn't say anything as he pushed me into the back of the ER, bypassing triage and the waiting room. Carlisle walked next to Charlotte, grilling her about how she was going to handle this. Charlotte smiled as she placed her hand on his shoulder, reassuring him that she was going do everything and anything she could to keep all three of us safe, which seemed to satisfy him. At least for now.

Charlotte ordered Edward to help me put on a gown while she waited outside the room. His hands shook as he helped me strip off my clothes, pulling on the cotton hospital gown. Leaning down and kissing my forehead, he helped me lay back on the bed and went to the door to let her know I was ready. I wasn't ready for this. I should have had at least eight to ten more weeks before meeting my son and daughter. Tears welled up once again.

"Ok, let's see what's going on," said Charlotte, pulling in an ultrasound machine.

I laid there, silently while she got everything ready, washing her hands and pulling on some gloves. Edward was sitting in a chair next to me, holding my hand up to his lips, trying to be the strong one. But these were his babies, too. He needed them just as much as I did. Maybe even more than I did.

"Ok," sighed Charlotte, setting at the edge of my bed. Gently pushing my legs back and raising my gown, she slipped two fingers into me, causing me to wince. "I'm sorry," she murmured.

I didn't respond, knowing that if I did, I would break down. She sighed, pulling her fingers out. "Your water did break." I inhaled raggedly. "Stay strong for me, Bella."

"It's too early," I choked out, shaking my head.

"I know, but that doesn't mean the babies have to come today. Just calm down," she said, soothing me.

I tried but the thought of losing either one of my babies, tore at my heart. Edward moved his arm up and around me, as much as he could, and held me. Charlotte flicked off the lights, turning on the ultrasound machine and started looking at our son and daughter. She had her eyes glued to the monitor, taking measurements of fluids, the size of the babies, even though I had just seen her last week and she had done an ultrasound then. My eyes were focused on their tiny hearts, beating away, their arms and legs moving and the way they curled up next to each other. They were beautiful.

"Ok, so Baby A's water broke, but it's just a small break," explained Charlotte, showing us on the monitor. "Baby B's is still intact."

"So what do we do?" I asked, taking a deep, cleansing breath.

"Well, you will be staying here until the babies come, and hopefully that won't be for another few weeks at least," Charlotte told us.

"But the babies will be ok, right?" I asked, needing more from her.

"They are still going to be early, Bella," she said, softly. "I am going to give you some medicine that will help strengthen their lungs, and I want you on an IV to get fluids in you."

I nodded my head, frowning. "Sweetheart, you have to stay strong," she said, grabbing my free hand. "I know it's scary, but we will get through this together."

I opened my mouth to speak, but the tears stopped me. However, Edward spoke for both of us. "Charlotte, these babies...they're," he paused, "they are everything to us."

"I know," she said, sincerely. "I can't promise you that everything is going to be a barrel of roses, but I can promise you that I will be here, doing everything I can to make sure that your son and your daughter get the best start in life. You have my word."

"Thank you," I wept. "Let's just hope they are ok."

Charlotte left us alone while she went to get my hospital stay all worked out and to let my father and Edward's parents know that, for now at least, everything was ok. Edward leaned his head on the side of my bed, moving his hand over to my belly, rubbing gently. The babies pushed against his hand, reminding us both that they were still there.

As a nurse came in and started my IV, giving me my first dose of steroids and starting my first of many bags of fluids, Edward kept his hand on my tummy, his head on my bed, and his hold on my heart. My hand rested on top of his, letting my fingers blend with his. The nurse walked over to the door, pulling it open.

"Oh, can I help you?" she asked. Edward and I both looked over, finding Charlie standing there, pain and fear waring over him.

"He's with us," I said, quietly. The nurse nodded her head and walked past him. Charlie held the door open, unsure if he should come in or not. "Come in, Dad."

"Everything ok?" he asked, letting the door shut behind him. I shook my head, knowing that nothing was ok right now. "Stupid question, I guess."

"It wasn't," I murmured, shifting slightly in the bed. Charlie, of course, noticed.

"What is it?" he asked, frantically coming over and waving his hands over me.

"Nothing," I chuckled. "I'm just a little uncomfortable."

"You sure?" he asked.

"Yeah, pretty sure," I muttered, feeling irritated.

"Sorry," grumbled Charlie.

"No, I'm sorry, Dad," I whispered. "I'm just...tired and scared."

"Me too, Honey," he sighed, sitting down on the side of my bed, but stood up quickly.

"You can sit there," I said, smiling.

"I don't want to hurt you." He fidgeted, shifting from one foot to the other.

"You won't, Charlie," snorted Edward, shaking his head.

My father sat down cautiously, but sprang up a second later when the door to my room opened. Charlotte came in, followed by the blond man from the waiting room. Charlie scooted out of the way, pressing himself against the wall like he was afraid that she was going to scold him for being too close to me. She smiled and looked over at me.

"You about ready to head up to your room?" she asked.

"No," I replied, honestly. The man with her laughed, trying to sober up as we all looked at him.

"Sorry, but she told me you were sassy," he smiled. I cocked an eyebrow over at Charlotte.

"Bella, Edward, Charlie-this is my husband, Peter," she said, placing her hand on his arm. "Peter and I were on our way to dinner when Edward called. He insisted on staying, I hope that's ok."

"It's just as much as she talks about you two, I wanted to be here any way I could," added Peter. I looked from him to her, shocked that she would talk about us to anyone.

"Oh, Bella, just about how much I like you both," she clarified, sensing my anguish.

"Oh," I murmured, shifting my gaze back over to him.

"I can leave, if you'd like," he offered, gesturing to the door.

"It's fine," I said. "She's told us about you, too."

"Oh, great," he groaned, shaking his head while Charlotte laughed. "Everything she told you was a lie, all of it."

"Really?" asked Edward, smirking. "Because she told us you were funny."

"And smart," I included. "Oh, and there was something about you being handsome but since she lies..."

Peter smiled as I let my words go. "Well, maybe she does tell the truth sometimes."

"Only sometimes?" she asked, watching him closely.

"All the time," he amended. "I should just stop talking before I get myself into trouble."

"Probably smart," chuckled Edward.

"There is nothing funny right now!" exclaimed Charlie, throwing his hands up. Everyone looked over at him, surprised by the outburst. "My daughter is laying here, twenty-six weeks pregnant with twins, and you all are acting like you're standing in Walmart or something."

Before I could say anything, Charlotte started apologizing. Peter added that he was just trying to make us all feet at ease but Charlie kept arguing with them about how they weren't taking this serious and that he expected more; how if Charlotte couldn't do her job, he would find me a new doctor. Meanwhile, Edward rolled his eyes at my father and picked my hand back up, going back to feeling our babies move. All their talking made my head hurt.

"Everyone just stop." Charlie, Charlotte, and Peter looked over at me. "I'm tired, and I'm scared, and, goddamn it, if I want to laugh at something I will. It might be the only fucking thing I can do right now and I won't let you all start acting like I'm all fragile and shit."

As I spoke, my eyes filled with tears that spilled over, running down my cheeks. Edward was on his feet, wiping them off as fast as he could, but they just poured down my face, falling heavily. He looked over at the three of them. "Stop arguing," he muttered. "She's doing the best she can and if she wants to laugh at some stupid crap, then she can." Turning back to me, he said, "Man, they just make my head hurt."

I laughed, even though there were tears in my eyes still. "Mine, too," I giggled, sniffing.

"Ok, well, we should get you up to your room," murmured Charlotte.

Charlotte had a couple of orderlies come in and push my bed out of the trauma room, while she, Peter, and Edward followed. Charlie muttered something about letting Carlisle and Esme know what room we were going to be in. I think he was just embarrassed with how he behaved and needed a few minutes to let it pass. Charlie and I were a lot alike.

Charlotte led us up to the labor and delivery floor, and into a large, private birthing suite. In that moment, reality came crushing down on me. One day, in the near future, I would leave this room with or without my babies. I was praying for leaving with them.


	50. Chapter 50

Fifty

"Are you sure?" I asked, shifting in my hospital bed for the umpteenth over the last seven weeks. This bed and my back did not like each other and made their dislike painfully clear.

"Yes," said Charlie, sitting on the end. "It was Colonel Mustard, in the garden, with the hammer."

I shook my head as I looked over at Edward, who was sitting next to my bed, feet propped up, and laughing silently. "Tell the man he's wrong."

"Am not," grumbled Charlie.

"You are, too," I smirked. "It's Miss Scarlet, in the conservatory, with the revolver."

Charlie scoffed and turned back to Edward. "Well, tell us who's right."

Edward pulled the three cards our of the small brown envelope and smiled. "Miss Scarlet, in the conservatory, with the revolver."

"Ha!" I exclaimed, tossing my paper on the small, rolling hospital tray. "I won!"

"You cheated," he grumbled, standing up and gathering up the game board, tossing it all back into the box.

"How'd I cheat?" I asked, snickering. "I've been laying here in this stupid bed, like I have been for the last seven weeks."

"The boy was giving you signals or something," muttered Charlie, causing me to laugh. "It's not funny."

"Oh, it's entirely funny," I giggled. "You always were the worst loser when we played games. Mom would always have to get on you to stop being such a baby."

"You always cheated," he laughed, siting back down on the bed. I smiled, leaning back on the bed, and stretching as much as I could. "You ok, Kid?"

"Super duper," I murmured. "Kind of getting tired of this bed."

"You've already made it longer than Charlotte ever expected you to." Edward stood up, and stretched as he came over to my bed. Leaning down and kissing my forehead, he said, "I'm going to take a walk. Be back soon, ok?"

"Don't go far," I whispered, bringing my hand up to his face.

"I won't," he promised.

As Edward left, he clapped my father on the shoulder, silently telling him what he did every time he left in order to give us a few minutes alone; don't make me cry. It was futile effort, seeing as everything made me cry these days. Most of the tears were tears of happiness or joy but sometimes, my insecurities got the better of me and my tears reflected those moments. Charlie smiled as he turned back to me, placing his hand on the tray between us.

"So, how's he doing?" asked Charlie, gesturing toward the door.

"He's doing as good as can be expected since he hasn't left the hospital in seven weeks, either."

"School giving him any shit about taking this semester off?"

"Not since Esme went in and talked to Tex Selvidge," I laughed, placing my hand on my belly. Any little movement was uncomfortable, and jarred the babies around. They didn't much like it, as they usually started kicking the crud out of me. "She set him pretty straight."

"I bet she did," grimaced Charlie. "I wouldn't want to get on that woman's bad side."

"Me either," I murmured. Shifting again, I groaned. "Help me roll onto my side."

"Um, ok," muttered Charlie, standing up.

I lowered my hospital bed a little so that I was laying a little flatter, but not too much, or I wouldn't be able to breathe as easily. My babies took up every inch of extra space inside of me, but at least they were still in there, for now at least. Charlie took my hand and gently pulled so that I rolled and laid on my left side, sighing in relief.

"Better?" he asked, patting me awkwardly on the arm.

"Yeah, thanks," I said. "My back is killing me today."

"Oh," he murmured, sitting back down next to me.

"So how's everything back in Clarendon?" I asked. "Miss anything big?"

"Um, let's see," he smiled. "Reverend Matthews out at Calvary Baptist caught his wife cheating on him with Coach Jack."

"No," I gasped, giggling.

"Yes, in the sanctuary," chuckled Charlie. "We got the call about a disturbance and found the good, old reverend beating the snot out of the coach. Course, he refused to press charges considering his pants were still down around his ankles and Martha had her panties in her hand."

"Ew," I shuddered. "That's so gross."

"I know," laughed Charlie, as the door to my room was opened. He stood up quickly as I looked over my shoulder. Only one person made him fidget like a little boy with his hand in the cookie jar. "Hello, Mary."

"Hello, Charlie," smiled Mary Jacobson, pulling her equipment behind her.

The older woman had long dark brown hair, pulled up into a bun, and bright blue eyes. She was thin, with soft ivory skin and a beautiful smile. She had been with me nearly everyday over the last seven weeks and had become a trusted friend. She was a widow and didn't have any children. Mary and Charlie had hit it off since the first day they met, even if they never said more than a few kind words to each other.

"You're looking very handsome today."

"Oh, well, thank you," muttered Charlie, blushing like a love-sick fool. Clearing my throat, I looked at Charlie, before shifting my eyes back over to Mary. "You look beautiful today. Your Scooby Doo scrubs are really nice."

I stifled my laughter as I rolled over onto my back. Men could be so cute when they were trying not to be too obvious with their flirting. I winced, sucking in a deep breath, as I felt a sharp pain in my side. Mary looked down at me, forehead scrunched up.

"You ok, Sweetheart?" she asked, sitting on the side of my bed, putting her hand on my stomach.

"No," I gasped, clenching my fist as tightly as I could. "Pain."

"Where?" she asked, as Charlie tensed up and nearly ran out of the room.

"Here," I cried, gesturing to the right side of my stomach. Just as the pain was starting to lesson, I felt a gush of fluid from between my legs. "I'm wet," I nearly screamed.

Mary stood up, and pulled the blanket off my legs. My shorts were soaked, as was the bed under me. She picked up my room phone and called a number. Waiting just a moment, she entered a different number and hung up. She reached over to the baby monitors that had been monitoring their heartbeats and started reading the strips following out of them. Less than a minute later, the phone in my room rang. Mary reached out and grabbed it, pulling it up to her ear.

"Dr. Davis, Bella Cullen's second sack has burst, I believe, and she's been contracting for at least two hours...yes...yes, Dr. Davis, I'll tell her," said Mary, before hanging up the phone. She smiled as she looked down at me. "Dr. Davis is on her way. You're having your babies today."

"It's too soon," I cried, shaking my head violently. Mary smiled as she placed her hand on my cheek.

"Sweetheart, they're coming so you had better start accepting it," she said, calmly. "You made it to thirty-three weeks, Bella. Your babies are ready, and you are ready."

"I'm not," I whimpered. The door to my room opened and Edward came rushing in, followed closely by Charlie, who was out of breath and very red in the face. Edward was at my side in a heartbeat, wiping the tears off my face as they fell. With a trembling chin, I cried, "Thanks, Daddy."

"Anything for you," he muttered, uncomfortably. Mary smiled as she looked from me to my father.

"You're a good man, Charlie," she smiled. "Now, why don't you do us a favor and step out in the hall so I can get your daughter changed into a gown."

"Oh, yeah, ok," mumbled Charlie, stepping away from the door.

"Daddy!" I called. He pushed the door open and looked back at me. "Stay close, ok? I'm gonna need ya."

"I'll be right here," he promised.

"Ok," I murmured.

Charlie let the door shut behind him and Edward stood up, helping me peel my t-shirt off. If I hadn't spent seven weeks in this room, in the bed, I would have been terribly uncomfortable with Mary seeing me nearly naked. As it was, she had seen me with nothing on and all I could really focus on right now, were my babies. Edward leaned over and kissed me before helping me slip on my pink hospital gown, and pulling off the shorts and panties that were now ruined. He lifted me out of the bed so that Mary could change my sheet and place a cover on it, that way I wouldn't mess the sheet again. Edward held me in his arms, forehead leaned down against mine and a smile on his face.

"We're having babies," he whispered.

"I know," I murmured. "It's early, though."

"They're ready."

Meaning every word that I spoke, I said, "I love you."

"I love you, too," he whispered, leaning in and kissing me.

"Ok, lover-boy, put her back down," laughed Mary. Edward blushed as he set me back on the bed. She reattached the fetal monitors around my enormous belly. I smiled, taking a deep breath. "Are you better now? Calmer?"

"No," I laughed, nervously. "I'm scared to death."

"I know you are, Sweetheart," she smiled, pulling the blanket back over my legs. "We're in this together, though. Ok?"

"Ok," I murmured.

"Good girl," she giggled. "Now, are you ready for Charlie to come in?"

"Mary, my dad is a really good guy," I said, quietly. She smiled and sat on the side of my bed.

"I know he is," she murmured.

"He deserves to be happy," I added.

"He does," agreed Mary. "But he has to see that for himself. I can't make him see it."

"I know," I said. "I just worry about him."

"Of course, you do." Standing back up, she smiled. "I do, too, Bella."

Mary brought her hand up to my face once more before walking over to the door, and telling Charlie that it was ok to come in. He walked in awkwardly, clearly unsure on what to do. I reached out for him as I was hit by another contraction. Charlie took my hand as Edward held my other, keeping it pressed against his lips. After a minute, the pain started to subside and I took a deep breath.

"Are you ok?" asked Charlie. I cocked my eyebrow at him. "Stupid question, I know."

"Did you call Carlisle and Esme, everyone else?" I asked.

"I did," confirmed Charlie, pulling a chair up to the side of my bed. "Well, I called Carlisle. He told Esme while on the phone with me and she was already calling Alice. I'm sure the news will be all over town in the next ten minutes."

"And they will be here in forty," laughed Edward, placing his free hand on my belly. "I think they are almost as excited to meet the babies as we are."

"Almost," I said, quietly. "But not quite."

Over the next half an hour, I had two more contractions, and managed to squeeze my father's hand so hard that he winced, but he never let go. I was laying on my side, while Edward rubbed on my lower back when the door to my room opened once again. Mary came in, smiling at Charlie, with Charlotte right behind her, already wearing a pair of hot pink scrubs. Charlotte noticed the look between my father and Mary, too, smirking to herself as she came over to me.

"How are you feeling, Sweetheart?" she asked, taking a look at the long strips coming out of the machines.

"I'm hanging in there," I murmured. "They hurt like a bitch."

"They're supposed to," smiled Charlotte. She settled down on the side of the bed. "I know you are still scared but the babies have been doing so great. You made it longer than I thought you would be able to and it's ok now."

"How can you be sure?" I asked.. "They are still seven weeks early."

"True, but most twin pregnancies don't make it past about thirty-five, thirty-six weeks. You already beat the odds by lasting seven weeks after your water broke with Baby A."

"You really...oh crap," I cried, grabbing Edward's hand.

Charlie nearly bowled Charlotte over as she moved and he grabbed my other hand, holding it as tightly as he could. If I hadn't been in pain, I would have laughed but I was, so I didn't. After a moment, the pain began to ease up and I went to let go of my father's hand but he refused to let me. Smiling weakly at him, I shifted on the bed.

"Better now?" asked Charlotte.

"Yeah," I murmured.

"Good, I would like to do a quick exam," she explained, looking at Charlie, whose eyes sprang open and quickly let go of my hand.

"I'll be outside," he muttered, uncomfortably walking over to the door.

"Daddy," I murmured. He stopped and smiled, looking back at me.

"I'll be just outside the door."

I nodded and he walked out, Mary following him out. Looking back at Charlotte, I noticed her watching Mary and Charlie, too. "How long before he tells her that he likes her?" she asked.

"I don't know," I replied, honestly. "He's kind of stubborn."

"Hmm, so is he the one you get it from?" she asked, standing up and grabbing some gloves.

"Yeah," I admitted, placing my free hand on my belly. Edward was still holding my other one. "Being stubborn got me through a lot, though."

"Yes, it did, and it's getting your babies through a lot, too," murmured Charlotte, pulling the blanket off my legs and sitting back down on the side of my bed. "Now, I want to check and see how much you are dilated."

"Ok," I whispered.

Edward brought my hand back up to his lips as I put my ankles together and let my knees fall to the side. Charlotte gently pushed her fingers into me, or tried to be gentle at least, but if I was honest, it hurt like a bitch. After a moment, she pulled her fingers out and ripped off her gloves, tossing them into the trash.

"Five centimeters down," she smiled. "Five to go."

"Wow," I murmured.

"When you get closer to delivery, I want to move you to the OR," she said, quietly. My eyes bugged out of my head. "It's just a precaution, Bella. I just want to be prepared for anything and everything with your babies."

"Ok, if you're sure," I whispered.

Before Charlotte could say anything else, I was hit by another contraction. My father was back in the room and at my side in a heartbeat, holding my hand firmly in his. Charlotte said something about getting an ultrasound machine, just to check on the position of the babies, and left the room. Mary sat at the end of my bed, rubbing my foot as the contraction started to ease up a little. Taking a deep breath, I laughed softly.

"What's so funny?" asked Edward.

"Nothing," I giggled, tears filling my eyes. "It's just...we're having babies."

"We are," he murmured, smiling. "Two of them."

I nodded as the tears sprinkled down my face. Edward smiled, leaning up and kissing me. His eyes were filled with tears that he was struggling to hold back. Pulling my hand out of my father's, I wrapped my arm around my husband and we cried together. Cried for the last forty-nine days that we had lived in this tiny room, hoping and praying for our babies to be born healthy.

"Why is she crying?" asked Charlotte, pushing the door to my room open and pulling an ultrasound machine in. "Did someone upset her?"

"No," said Mary, Charlie, and Edward. I laughed, leaning back on the bed.

"I'm just excited about the babies," I admitted, feeling silly.

Charlotte smiled. "Oh, good, cause I really didn't want to have to yell at anyone today," she said, sighing in relief. "Let's take a look at your babies."

"Ok," I murmured, swallowing thickly.

Charlie made to leave the side of my bed, but I reached out and grabbed his hand, silently asking him to stay. He smiled as he sat back down, slipping his hand over mine and squeezing gently. Mary flipped off the lights as Charlotte lifted my gown over my belly and started the scan. She turned the screen so that we could all see it. Tears filled my eyes as I looked at my babies again.

"Oh my god," gasped Charlie. I looked up at him as he brought his free hand up, covering his mouth. He blinked several times, trying to stop the tears from falling.

"Aren't they beautiful, Daddy?" I cried.

"Yeah, Honey, they are," he murmured, nodding his head and looking down at me. "Thank you for letting me be here."

"I need you here, Daddy," I whispered. "I'll always need you."

"The babies look great," said Charlotte, breaking through the moment my father and I were having, causing us to turn back to her. "Baby A, your little girl, is head first and ready to meet the world. Baby B, your little fella, is still snuggling behind his sister. He's breach right now, but that may change when his sister is born."

"And if he doesn't?" asked Edward.

"Then we can try to turn him or we can try to deliver him breach," she explained. "This is why I want to move you into the OR to deliver."

"I trust you, Charlotte," I said, honestly. "I don't trust a lot of people, but I trust you."

"Good, because, Sweetheart, I am not going to let anything happen to your babies," she promised.

All I could do right now was believe her, and I did. I was in the middle of another contraction when Carlisle, Esme, Alice, Jasper, Rose, and Emmett came in. Rose, Emmett, and Jasper stayed next to the wall, like they were afraid I was going to rip their arms off or something. Of course, it may have been the series of four letter words I was grunting under my breath. Alice and Esme were immediately at my side, trying to take over for Charlie.

"I've got her," he told them harshly.

Alice began to protest but Esme placed her hand on her shoulder and smiled at my father, understanding that right now, he needed to do this for me, as much as I needed to him to be here. Carlisle, being the man of medicine that he was, started looking over my strips.

"You're contracting nicely," he said, smiling at me.

"So glad you think so," I muttered, taking a deep breath as the pain started to ease up. Carlisle's smile fell. "Sorry."

"Don't be," he said, softly as he sat on the edge of my bed. "I should have known better."

"True," I agreed. Closing my eyes, I felt Edward start rubbing my lower back, trying to make me feel better.

"Dude, get your fucking hands off of her. She's in labor," snapped Emmett. My eyes sprang open and I saw him glaring at his little brother. "Don't you think you've done enough."

I burst out laughing, causing everyone to look over at me. "What's so funny?" huffed Emmett, crossing his arms in front of him.

"You would think you were the one going through labor with the way you are acting," I snickered. Edward chuckled and started rubbing my back again. Before anyone could say anything, I was hit by a new contraction, a particularly bitchy one. "Oh, sweet motherfucker," I cried, digging my nails into the hands I was holding.

"Breathe, Baby," murmured Edward, putting more pressure on my back. "In and out, slowly."

"Edward," I cried, pulling his arm up around my torso.

"I'm here," he whispered, leaning down to my ear. "I'm always right here."

As the contraction started to lose power, Alice, Rose, Jasper, and Emmett took off out of my room, muttering something about too many people and that they would wait out in the waiting room. Charlie, Carlisle, and Esme all laughed at them but Edward kept his arm around me, holding me as I rested between contractions. Always holding me.

Over the next few hours, I continued to labor. Charlie and Edward sat on either side of my bed, holding my hands and whispering words of encouragement as I cried my way through one contraction to another, and another. Carlisle and Esme kept me in wet wash cloths and ice chips. I was glad they were there, and that they understood what I needed. They always understood what I had needed. Even when I wasn't sure that I needed them or deserved them, they were there.

"How are we doing in here?" asked Charlotte, as she and Mary came in for the fifth time in the last three hour.

"It hurts," I cried, hiccuping. "I can't do this. I'm not strong enough."

"You are," murmured Charlotte. "Let's check your progress."

"Charlotte," I sobbed.

"They're worth it," she said, thickly.

I nodded my head and let Edward help me roll on to my back. Instead of leaving the room like Carlisle and Esme did, Charlie simply brought his hand up to my head, brushing the hair out of my face and keeping his eyes locked on mine. I needed him to stay.

"You are just shy of nine centimeters," said Charlotte, slipping her fingers out of me. I looked over at her. "It's time to change rooms."

I nodded my head, unable to say anything more. Charlotte and Mary started getting everything ready for my move from the room I had been living in for weeks, and down to the OR where, I would finally meet my babies. Edward and Charlie held my hands as I had another contraction. Once I was able to get through that one, Charlotte and Mary pulled my bed out of the room and out into the hall. Carlisle and Esme were standing just outside the door, arms wrapped around each other.

"Stop," I said, shakily. Charlotte and Mary didn't question me. I reached out for Carlisle and Esme, taking their hands in mine. "Thank you...for everything," I cried.

"No, Sweetheart," smiled Esme, tears filling her eyes. "Thank you of coming home."

"We love you, Bella," murmured Carlisle, leaning down and kissing the top of my head. "We are so proud of you."

Unable to stop the sobs that rocketed through my body, I let go of their hands. Carlisle wrapped his arms around Esme as Charlotte and Mary pulled me down the hallway, past the amazing nurses and aides who had been there for me over the last seven weeks. All of them were smiling, anxiously awaiting the birth of my babies. Emmett, Rose, Alice, and Jasper stood at the entrance to the waiting room, arms wrapped around each other and smiles on their faces. Charlotte pulled my bed into the OR where three more nurses and another doctor were waiting for us. It wasn't until he turned around that I realized it was Peter.

"Hey, Bella, you ok?" he asked, coming over to the side of my bed. He had been a pretty permanent fixture here at the hospital over the last seven weeks. Through getting to know him better, Edward and I learned that he was a pediatrician. The more we got to know him, the more certain we were that we wanted him to be our babies doctor.

"I'm trying," I sniffled, smiling weakly.

"It's hard, I understand, but we are ready and everything is going to be ok," he said, reassuringly.

"I know," I murmured.

Peter helped get my bed set up so that I could deliver. Charlie's eyes were wide and frightful but he never let go of my hand, holding on to me nearly as tightly as I was clutching to him. Edward brought my hand he was holding up to his lips, peppering my knuckles and fingers with kisses. A tear slipped from his face onto my fingers and I smiled at him.

"When I saw you sitting on the beach that day, I almost left," he whispered, keeping his lips down onto my hand. "Then you looked back at me and I saw it."

"Saw what?" I asked, vaguely aware of everyone watching us.

"That I needed you," he murmured, closing his eyes. "That for the first time, in so fucking long, Bella, I felt something other than just angry."

"Edward," I cried.

Opening his eyes, he leaned up and kissed me. "You always say that I saved you, but, Baby, it was all you. You came back to me."

"I came home to you."

Another contraction soared through me, breaking the peaceful moment between me and my husband. Charlie took the wet wash cloth from Mary and started wiping my forehead while Edward breathed through it with me. Charlotte was settled at the end of my bed, with my legs in stir-ups. Mary stood behind my father, laying her hand on his shoulder. Peter, and the three nurses with him, were standing by the bassinets, prepared to take my babies as soon as they were both and make sure they were ok.

Just as that contraction began to wane, another one started. Then another, and another. My body shook and trembled, my hair was soaked and my face saturated with tears. Charlotte smiled as she looked over my belly at me.

"You're ready to push," she said, confidently.

I opened my mouth to speak but found that I couldn't get the words out. Instead, I nodded my head and looked over at Edward. "We're ready," he whispered.

As the next contraction hit, I barred down and began pushing. Fire and burning soared through me, pressure and pain followed. Counting to ten, I let go of the breath I was holding and sucked in a new one. Leaning forward, as much as I could, I gripped the hands holding mine and pushed, trying to get my babies out. Over the next hour, I pushed and pushed, digging deep and trying to draw on every ounce of strength I had, then trying to find even more.

"Come on, Bella, one more and Baby A will be here," ordered Charlotte.

"Ok, ok," I murmured, weakly lifting my head off the bed as I felt the need to push again.

Gritted down, I leaned up and pushed as hard as I could, letting out a loud, throaty scream as the Baby A's head came out, followed closely with the rest of her tiny body. I leaned back onto the bed, panting as I waited to hear her start crying. Seconds later, I heard her cry echoing through the room. My body shook as I cried with her.

"Edward," said Charlotte. "Come cut your daughter's cord."

"Fuck that," he muttered. "I'll hurt her."

"Do it," I whimpered.

He looked at me with wide eyes before he stood up off his chair and moved around to the end of the bed. Taking the scissors in his hand, he leaned down and cut her cord, smiling up at me. Charlotte stood up and held our daughter up so I could see her. She was beautiful and completely covered in goo, but still beautiful.

"Meet your daughter, Mommy," giggled Charlotte.

"She's beautiful," I cried, gasping as another contraction hit.

"Oh, look, her brother doesn't want to be left out," laughed Charlotte, handing our daughter over to Peter. Edward looked torn on whether he should stay with me or go with her. "Stay with your wife, Edward."

He smiled bashfully as he came back over and took my hand back in his. "Sorry," he muttered.

"Whatever," I grumbled, fighting the urge to slap him but I knew he was just trying to be with our baby, too. Charlotte stood up and pressed down on my abdomen.

"Baby B is head down," she smiled. "You ready to go again?"

"I don't know," I muttered, humorlessly.

"Well, get ready cause he wants to play, too," she said, as a new contraction hit.

"AAHH," I cried, bolting forward and pushing down.

"He's close, Bella," she cheered, pressing my legs further apart. "Just a little more."

Squeezing the crap out of Edward and Charlie's hands, I screamed, "FUUUUUUCK!"

Fire and burning, pressure and pain radiated through me once again. As that contraction eased away, I fell back just to feel another one coming along after it. Barring down once again, I pushed as hard as I could, drawing on the very limited amount of strength I had left. My hair flopped against my face, mingling with the sweat and tears that poured down.

"One more big one, Bella," yelled Charlotte, standing up and kicking her stool out of the way. "Grab her legs, pull them back."

Without even thinking, Edward and Charlie grabbed my legs, just behind my knees and pulled them back. Digging my nails into their hands, I barred down and began to push again. Baby B came sliding out into Charlotte's waiting arms. Edward and Charlie let go of my legs and I flopped back onto the bed, crying. Just like with his sister, a moment after he was born, his cry echoed through the room.

"Oh my god," I cried.

"Edward," said Charlotte, holding out the scissors to him.

This time, Edward didn't hesitate as he walked down to the end of my bed and cut our son's cord, huge smile on his face. Charlotte held my son up so I could see him. He was just as beautiful as his sister.

"He's so beautiful," I cried.

"He is," she confirmed, turning and handing off to Peter. Edward didn't even think before he followed Peter over to where our daughter was waiting for her brother.

"Are they ok?" I asked.

"They are perfect, Bella," smiled Peter, looking over his shoulder at me. "We're going to take them down to the nursery, get them all cleaned up for you, make sure everything is ok, and then we will bring them right back."

"Edward," I murmured.

"I'm staying with them, Baby," he said, reassuring me.

I smiled weakly as he followed Peter, and the three nurses who were holding our babies. Charlie brought his hand up to my lips, kissing my knuckle, and I looked over at him. "You did good, Kid."

"Thanks for staying with me, Dad," I whispered, drowsily. "I know it's weird that I wanted... no, needed you in here, but I did."

"I'm glad I could be," he smiled. Shaking his head, he chuckled. "Your momma would have been so proud of you."

"You think so?" I asked. He nodded his head. "You know, she would want you to be happy."

Charlie dropped his eyes to the ground. "I know," he said, frowning. "I've loved her for so long."

"She knows," I whispered.

"Well, we're ready to take you back to your room, Bella," said Charlotte. Looking over at her, I smiled.

"You did real good, Bella. The babies looked good."

"Thank you, Charlotte," I murmured, sincerely.

"All I did was help push you not to give up," she smiled.

Charlie stood up as she and Mary pushed my bed back out into the hallway. Once again all the nurses were waiting by the nurses desk. As I walked by, they all started clapping, causing me to blush and smile. When they rolled me back into my room, I found Emmett, Rose, Alice, Jasper, Carlisle, and Esme waiting to me, or rather the babies, with their arms full of balloons and two teddy bears, one pink and one blue.

"Hey, Sweetheart," smiled Esme, coming up to the bed as the got me into position. "You ok?"

"For feeling like a truck ran over me," I murmured. Charlotte laughed and hooked up a new bag to my IV.

"This is will help you. Something for the pain, don't be afraid to press it," she said, handing me the small slicker. I smiled and clicked it for her. "Good girl. I'm going to head down and check on your babies, but they should be back in here soon."

"Thank you," giggled Esme, giddy with joy. Charlotte left and everyone crowded around the bed, making me feel like quite the freak show.

"Give her some space," said Charlie, shooing them back as he sat next to my bed. "She's had a long day."

I smiled weakly as everyone scooted back a step or two. Closing my eyes, I brought my hand down to my flatter stomach, even though I still had quite the large pooch. I must have dosed off because the next thing I knew, was the feeling of someone stroking my cheek. My eyes fluttered open and I found Edward sitting next to me, huge smile on his face.

"Two little someones want to meet you officially," he said, quietly gesturing to the bassinets behind him.

"They're ok?" I asked, trying to push my self up but wincing at the pain. Charlie was by my side in an instant, helping me. I smiled and turned my attention back to Edward.

"They're perfect," he murmured, lifting our daughter first. He set her in my arm and she opened her little eyes, yawning widely. "She weighed five pounds, two ounces and was eighteen inches long."

"She beautiful," I breathed. Her eyes were dark, so I couldn't tell if she would have my dark eyes or Edward's green ones. Pulling her little hat off, I smiled at the small patch of auburn hair that sat on her head. "I was hoping she would have your hair."

"I hope she gets your eyes," he said, lifting our son and placing him in my other arm. Edward pulled off his hat, showing off the dark peach fuzz that covered his tiny head.. "He's two ounces bigger than his sister, and one inch longer."

"He's beautiful, too," I cried, laughing at the tears slipped down my face. Looking up, I noticed that everyone standing back against the wall, watching me meet my children for the first time. Alice, Rose, and Esme were all in the arms of their husbands, or fiance's, while my daddy was standing next to Rose. "Would you like to meet them?"

"Yes," they all murmured, so softly that I barely heard them.

Smiling as I looked up at Edward, I said, "I would like you to meet Elizabeth Renee and Lucas Charles."

"Elizabeth?" asked Esme, smiling. "After my mother?"

"Beth for short, but yes, after Nana," answered Edward. He looked over at Carlisle. "Luke, after Grandpa."

"Thank you," he whispered, thickly. My eyes were locked on my fathers.

"After you and Momma, Daddy," I murmured. Charlie's chin trembled as he walked over, leaning down and kissing the top of my head.

"Thank you, Honey," he whispered. "For coming home and letting me take care of you. I love you."

"I love you, too."

I looked down at Beth and Luke, who were watching me with wide, innocent eyes. My beautiful babies were here, they were healthy, and, as I looked up at Edward, I knew, that no matter what, we would be a family. He leaned down and kissed me before kissing the babies. Right now, that's all we knew and all that mattered.


	51. Chapter 51

Fifty-One

"Have I told you that you look beautiful?" Edward asked. I looked at him through the mirror, a warm blush spreading over my cheeks.

"Once or twice over the years." I smiled, letting my eyes travel down the length of his body. He looked devastatingly handsome in his black tuxedo. His auburn hair had somehow been tamed. Though to be honest, I preferred it in disarray, the way it was meant to be.

Edward walked up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist. "Are you nervous?"

"Terrified," I murmured. "There are going to be a lot of people watching me."

"Yes, there will be, but only because you've inspired them." His lips traveled along the crook of my neck. "I'm so proud of you."

"You are?" I whispered, covering his hands with mine.

He nodded, brushing his lips across my ear. "You're amazing and I love you more every day."

I turned in his arms, wrapping my arms around his neck. "I love you, too."

Leaning up on my toes, I pressed my lips against his, melting into his embrace. Edward moaned, his arms tightening around me. His fingers trailed along my bare back, the dress I wore left nothing to the imagination. My skin pebbled under his touch, yearning for more. Time hadn't curved the craving I felt for him, nor his for me.

Edward pulled his lips from mine, taking a ragged breath. "Come on, love," he whispered, brushing his thumb across my cheek. "It's time to go."

With the simple nod, I grabbed my handbag off the counter in front of me and hooked my arm in with his. Edward and I walked out of our hotel room, heading down the hallway to the elevator. My legs shook, my nerves dancing like butterflies flittering in the sunlight. Tonight was one of the biggest nights in my life. Five years had changed everything we thought we knew.

There was a time when the idea of stepping out of my comfort zone and putting myself in the spotlight would have had me cowering in fear. While I still found myself fighting off the urge to hide behind my family, to let them fight my battles for me, I'd finally been able to heal from the abuse I'd suffered at the hands of my first husband. Mike might have beaten me down, but with Edward's help, I'd managed to claw my way through the pain and make something of myself. Of course without him, I wouldn't be the woman I was right now. I owed him everything.

Jarring to a stop, the elevator doors slid open, startling me. Edward unwound his arm from mine, only to move his hand to the small of my back. His reassuring touch was all I needed to be able to step out, resisting the urge to fidget with the front of my silk, black dress. Normally, I was more of a jeans and t-shirt kind of woman, but those wouldn't fly tonight.

"Mommy." I smiled, looking toward the lounge where my five year old daughter, Elizabeth Renee, or Beth as we called her, was sitting with Esme.

She jumped to her feet and took off running toward me, her red satin dress flying past her. Her long auburn hair had been curled, the front pinned up out of her face. By the time she was two feet from me, she'd launched herself into my arms, wrapping her little legs around me. Her green eyes sparkled, shimmering brighter than the stars above.

Beth gasped. "You look so pretty, Mommy. Like one of those princesses in my books."

"Thank you, my darling," I murmured, shifting her onto my hip. I nuzzled her cheek with my nose. Freckles sprinkled her cheeks and nose, just one more part she'd inherited from Edward. "You look gorgeous. Did Nana curl your hair?"

She nodded, picking up the diamond pendent that rested on my chest. "She said we had to look our best for you tonight because you're getting a special award."

"She's right, but you look beautiful no matter what you're wearing."

"Oh, I know." Beth shrugged her shoulders and jumped out of my arms, landing gracefully next to me. She definitely didn't inherit that from me. She grabbed my hand. "Come on, Mommy."

"Okay, okay," I giggled.

Beth led me and Edward over to where the rest of our family waited for us. The most important person stood in front of Esme, tugging nervously on his red tie. Slipping my hand out of my daughters, I knelt in front of my son, making placing my hands on his shoulders. Lucas Charles, or Luke, was definitely his mother's son. He had the same dark, brown hair and eyes as me. Where his twin sister was loud and full of life, Luke was more subdued, content to live his life in the shadows. Often, I worried that he'd always shy away from attention, letting Beth overshadow him. Somehow, he'd find his way in the world, finding himself in the process.

"You look very handsome, love," I murmured, bringing my hand up to his chin.

He bit his lip, a habit he'd picked up from me, as he looked me in the eye. "I don't like the tie. It chokes me."

"Yeah, I don't really like these shoes," I whispered, knowing that everyone could hear me, "but you know, my flip flops wouldn't really go with this dress, would they?" Luke laughed and shook his head. "Oh, well, guess I'm stuck in these heels."

"It's a tough life, Momma," he grumbled.

I smiled. "That it is, love."

Standing up, I took a deep breath, turning toward everyone else. Esme stood next to Luke, a beautiful smile covering her lips. Over the last few years, our relationship had only gotten stronger. She'd truly become the mother that I needed. While she'd never take Renee's place in my heart, Esme had been there when I found myself trying to balance taking care of newborn twins, the sudden success of my book, and finally letting go of the hold that Mike had over me.

Esme reached out and grabbed my hand, pulling me into her arms. "Oh, Bella, you look beautiful."

"Thank you," I whispered, the words coming out in a tremor, "for everything."

Brushing her lips across my cheek, she released me without a word. There wasn't anything she could say that she hadn't told me a hundred times before. Shifting my attention over to Carlisle, I smiled once again. Where Esme had fought tooth and nail for me to let her in, he'd been patient with me, giving me the time I needed to heal, to grieve the life I'd been thrust into unwillingly. He hadn't tried to be anything more than a friend. That meant more to me than anything.

Turning toward Alice and Jasper, I nearly rolled my eyes at how excited she was. Jasper had his hands on her shoulders, trying to calm her down. It wouldn't work, but it didn't matter, either. Alice never hid who she was, or how much she loved every person around her. Though some found her ways to be annoying or overbearing, it was the only way she knew to show how much she loved us, how much she needed to take care of her. She was nurturer by nature and I'd never fault her for that. Not again.

Alice smirked. "I told you that dress would look fabulous on you."

"You did," I admitted, pushing my hair behind my ear. "Much better than my homecoming dress, anyway."

"Only you would bring that up," she giggled, grabbing my hand.

"You look beautiful, Bells," Jasper said, leaning his head against Alice's. He was never very open about himself, but he needed this family more than people realized. He'd do anything to make his wife happy. I respected the way he loved her, the way he never held her back and let her shine. They were soul mates, pure and simple.

"Thanks, Jas." Before I say anything else, Emmett had me in one of his bear hugs. "Em, I need to breathe."

"Oh, sorry," he mumbled, releasing me. "You look nice."

"Um, thanks," I laughed, shaking my head.

He stepped back, slipping his arm around Rose, who stood with both her hands on her bulging belly. Almost five months along with their first child, she'd never been happier. Reaching out for her hands, I blinked back my tears. She giggled and took my hands, letting me pull her into my arms. If Rose hadn't been the one to pull my case, to be the one who sat next to my bed when I woke up in the hospital, I wouldn't be here, that much I knew. Putting me in my car and sending me home had saved my life, and in the process, brought her the man who loved her. Emmett never let a day go by that he didn't tell her that he needed her just the way she was.

"Love you, Rose," I whispered.

"Love you, too, Bella," she whimpered, her hormones getting the best of her. At least, that's the story we'd tell for now. She giggled, placing our joined hands on her belly. "I think she's a little excited, too."

"Oh, wow," I gasped, feeling my new niece squirming. "Still not sharing her name?"

"Nope," she replied, smirking. "Seems fair, you know considering that you kept Beth and Luke a secret from us."

"Whatever," I scoffed, releasing her hand.

My father cleared his throat, drawing my attention to him. He stood a couple feet from Rose, looking uncomfortable in his dark suit. The night I came driving up to his house had been one of the hardest moments of my life. The shame and guilt I felt for pushing him away and hiding what I'd been living through, nearly destroyed me, and him. However, Charlie fought for me, proving again and again that he loved me. The harder I pushed, the tighter his arms held me, nestling me against his chest, reminding me that regardless of what had been hammered into me by those forceful fists, I was worth it.

"Daddy," I whispered, reaching out and placing my hand on his chest.

"You look so much like your momma," he murmured, covering my hand with his. "She'd be so proud of you right now. You know that, don't you?"

I nodded, struggling to keep the tears from falling. "I can feel her here with us. Probably scowling over how mushy we're being."

Charlie laughed, bringing his hand up and wiping the tears from his eyes. "Sounds about right." He shook his head. "Woman of the Year, huh?"

"Yeah, I don't really get it, either, but what can I do, right?"

"Nobody deserves this more than you, honey." Charlie brought his hand up, cupping my face. "I've never been prouder of you than I am right now."

"Thanks, Daddy," I whispered, sliding into his arms and hugging him. "I love you."

"I love you, too." He kissed my forehead. "Now, let's get going. The sooner you get your award, the faster I can get this goddamn suit off."

I laughed, knowing that he was only complaining as a way of taking the focus off of me. Taking a deep breath, I turned back to my husband. He held out his hand, a cheeky smile on his lips. A dark blush crept up, causing him to moan. Only Edward could make a moan sexy as hell. I slid my fingers across his palm, weaving them in between his. Spinning me into his arms, he placed a chaste kiss on my lips, before leading the way toward the front doors.

Esme, Carlisle, and Charlie wrangled Beth and Luke into the backseat of their car with my father sliding in next to them. Rose and Emmett rode with Alice and Jasper, leaving Edward and I to climb into my car. With a smirk, I gripped the steering wheel of my Audie R8. After five years, I still preferred to drive my own car.

"Okay, baby," he started, making a show of putting his seatbelt on extra tight. "See if you can get us there on one piece."

Rolling my eyes, I started my car. "I'll do what I can."

Half an hour, and one wrong turn, later, I pulled my car up in front of the Austin Convention Center. The valet rushed around, opening the door for me. With a smile, I climbed out, dropping the keys in his waiting hand and hoping he wouldn't wreck my car. I met Edward under the red eave, slipping my arm in with his. Our family filed in behind us, excitement rolling off of all of them. We headed inside, collectively holding our breaths.

"Mrs. Cullen?" asked a tall, thin woman with dark, curly red hair and dark gray-blue eyes. She reached out for my hand, covering my fingers with hers. "It's an honor to meet you."

"You too, um…." I trailed off having not gotten her name.

"Oh, my goodness, I am such an idiot," she grumbled. "I'm Maggie O'Neal. We spoke over the phone a few times."

"Oh, of course." I smiled. "It's lovely to meet you. I have to be honest; I thought you'd be older."

"I get that a lot," she giggled. "My mother was the founder of this organization. She passed away last year and I took over. Her work was too important to let fall apart."

"I'm sorry about your mother. How have you been doing?" I asked, bringing my other hand up and covering both of ours.

"It's been hard," she admitted. "My mother went through a lot for me. She and I were incredibly close. I miss her a lot."

"I understand," I murmured.

Maggie slipped her hand out from under mine, trying to wipe away her tears discreetly. "Well, I will show you and your guest to your table." She turned and headed into the large banquet room.

Behind us, Beth gasped, "Oh, Mommy, it's so pretty."

"It is, my darling," I agreed.

The large room was filled with dozens of round tables. Each one had a white table cloth with blue and white floral center pieces in the middle. Half a dozen taper candles sat on each table, flickering like sunlight. There had to be at least two hundred, if not more, people milling around. As Maggie led us around the tables toward the front, everyone looked at us, clutching onto the arm of the person next to them, and whispering to each other. Edward slipped his hand out of mine, placing it on the small of my back. Once again, his touch was all I needed to relax.

"I can't tell you how thrilled we are that you're here. Your book was incredible." Maggie stopped at a table in the front, just to the left of the stage. Turning toward me, she brought her hand up, placing it over her heart. "You gave my mother the courage to leave my step-father. He wasn't a nice man, but she figured she'd never find anyone who would love her, or me. After she read All We Knew, she packed us each a bag and we left, finding a spot at a women's shelter. He came after her, but two homeless men were able to hold him back until the police could get there. She pressed charges and he ended up serving time in jail. We never heard from him again. She managed to find a cheap apartment and a job at a local diner. We didn't have much, but we had each other, which was enough for both of us."

"She sounds like an incredibly strong woman for being able to leave," I murmured.

"She was my hero," Maggie replied, blinking back her tears. "Anyway, here are your seats. We should be starting in a few minutes. Thank you again for coming. We're all just so thrilled to have you here."

Maggie left us alone, heading up onto the stage. Taking what felt like the hundredth deep breath of the night, I turned toward Edward. He smiled, before leaning in and brushing a kiss across my lips. "I love you."

"As I love you," I whispered.

We took our seats. Edward sat to my right while Beth and Luke took the two seats to my left. Charlie sat on the other side of Luke with Esme and Carlisle next to him. Rose, Emmett, Alice, and Jasper settled at the table next to ours. I picked up the program lying in front of me. We'd eat first, and then they'd present me with my award, before opening up the dance floor. Edward tapped me in the shoulder, causing me to look up. I gasped when I found Angela, Ben, Kate, Garrett, Lauren, and Tyler coming our way. Scrambling to me feet, I met them halfway, somehow managing to get all of them in my arms.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded.

"What in the hell do you think we are doing here?" Kate scoffed. "As soon as Edward called and told us about this, we booked our flights, bought our tickets, and got all pretty."

"Yeah, Bella, like we'd miss out on you being honored as Woman of the Year," Tyler added.

"But, why didn't you tell me?" I couldn't believe they'd actually come here for me.

"We wanted to surprise you," Lauren said, like it was completely obvious. "From the look on your face, I'd say we did."

"Yeah, you did," I laughed. "Thank you. I can't tell you how much I appreciate you all being here."

"We wouldn't be anywhere else." Garrett dug a card from the inside of his jacket. "This is from everyone at school; all the teachers and students from Pre-K all the way through the High School. We're so proud of you, Bella."

Taking it from him, I shook my head, my tears threatening to fall once again. "Wow, thank you."

"Don't thank me. We're just so proud of you." He leaned in and kissed my cheek. "Congratulations honey."

Garrett led Kate over to their table, sitting next to Rose and Emmett. Lauren and Tyler followed, leaving me alone with Angela and Ben. Five years later and they still weren't married, and as far as I knew, had no plans to change that little detail. Over the last few years, they'd really proven to be good friends to both Edward and I. Angela worked hard to get my book into the hands of my readers. She credited my success with my words, but I disagreed. She'd given me the opportunity to get my words out there, gave me a safe place to put them.

And Ben, well, he was there, ready to give me an encouraging smile. Over the years, he'd shared with me his work with men and women who found themselves in the same hell I'd been thrust into. He had a better understanding than most over how hard it was to move on, to let go of the pain and fear. He never pushed for more than he knew I was comfortable sharing, something I appreciated more than he'd ever know.

"I thought you had a big meeting in New York." I scowled, crossing my arms in front of me.

"Like we'd miss the biggest night in your life," Angela scoffed. "I made a few phone calls. Now, I have to catch a flight at six in the morning, but the sleep deprivation will totally be worth being able to see you get what you deserve."

"You didn't need to do that for me," I mumbled, feeling my cheeks turn pink. "I understood."

"I know you did, but, sweetie, I wanted to be here." She took my hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

Ben leaned forward, kissing my cheek. "You look beautiful, Bella."

My blush deepened. "Thank you, Ben."

Ben and Angela took the two seats next to Alice and Jasper. I settled back next to Edward, who was beaming with pride. The man would never truly understand how much I loved him, how much I needed him. He often said that I saved him, but the truth was we'd saved each other from a life of loneliness.

Maggie stepped up behind the podium, drawing everyone's attention up to her. Once everyone was settled, she said, "Welcome to the third annual Woman of the Years Banquet for The Texas Women's Society. I feel honored to be standing here in place of my mother. Her greatest wish was that one day; we'd be able to celebrate who we were. I feel like tonight is the start of that process for many of us. Please enjoy our meal and thank you for being here as we honor one of the most inspirational women I've ever had the privileged of meeting."

For the next hour, we chatted amongst ourselves, enjoying our dinner, and the atmosphere around us. Several women came over to me, asking for autographs on my book, or declaring how much I'd inspired them to make tough changes in their lives. I wasn't sure how to respond to them, so instead I told them thank you for being strong enough to make those choices for themselves. Because while my words may have ignited a fire inside of them, they ultimately saved themselves from whatever situation they were in.

Once all our empty dishes had been collected, Maggie made her way back up onto the stage. Beth and Luke were starting to get restless, though Charlie was doing everything he could to keep them entertained. Sometimes, he acted like a bigger child than they did. Clearing her throat, Maggie placed both her hands on the podium. The room suddenly became eerily silent, and I felt my stomach twisting from my nerves.

"Five years ago, a book hit the market that changed the way women everywhere saw themselves, and their lives. For most women, it might have been just a sad story of a woman who found herself living a life she'd never intended, but for many of us, or our mothers, Isabella Swan's book, All We Knew, was much more than just a story. We found ourselves in her; the horrors she disclosed, and gave us hope that one day we'd find our way out. It's an honor to present our Woman of the Year award to Isabella Swan."

Standing up, I blushed as everyone around us scrambled to their feet, clapping and cheering for me. I placed my hand on Edward's cheek before leaning up and kissing him. Without his support, I would have never sent Angela my book. He was my hero.

Taking another deep breath, I joined Maggie on the stage, hugging her before accepting the crystal plague. My name was etched in gold lettering, along with the date. Placing it on the podium, I looked over the men and woman before me, blushing as they continued to clap for me. After several minutes, they sat back down, focusing all their attention on me.

"People often ask about the inspiration behind All We Knew," I started, a wry smile slipping over my lips. "There's never an easy response to that question. Instead, I tell them everything encouraged it. The times when I found myself begging for help, pleading for the pain to stop, and afraid of when I found myself starting over, unable to trust who I'd become." Shifting my eyes over, I met Edward's, blushing from the intensity flowing off of him.

He watched me with a proud smile, one he saved just for me. "The journey wasn't easy, or pleasant, but with the help of my husband, my father, and the rest of our family, I was able to find myself. My dreams for the future lay in my children and the hope that they'll never know the same pain and fear that I did, but if they do, that they'll be strong enough to leave, to get help, and find the love they deserve."

I picked up the small, crystal plaque, running my fingers of the gold lettering. Taking a deep breath, I looked back up, my attention settling on my family. "I don't deserve this award, my family does. They were the ones who held me when I cried, listened to me screaming. They never gave up that one day I wouldn't blame myself for the years of abuse I endured at the hands of someone who claimed they loved me. They encouraged me to find my way in this world, to never stop fighting, and ultimately to take a chance and get my story out there. Again, thank you."

Stepping back from the podium, I clutched the plaque to my chest and walked off the small stage. The men and women around me were on their feet, clapping for me. However, my focus was on my husband, my children; the people who meant everything to me. Edward reached out, slipping his arms around me and pulling me into his embrace. In an instant his mouth had found mine, he claimed my heart and soul, just as he had done from the moment I saw him standing on the sandy beach.

"You're did fantastic," he whispered, barely pulling his lips from mine. "I am so proud of you, baby."

"I love you," I murmured, placing my hands on his chest.

"Daddy, Daddy," Beth cheered, wedging herself between Edward and I. "They turned on the music!"

Edward chuckled before kissing me again. He turned toward our daughter, offering her his hand. "Let's go, baby girl."

Beth grabbed his hand, letting him led her out onto the dance floor. He spun her, causing her to giggle. Edward and Beth had always had a closeness that rivaled my relationship with Charlie. He cherished her, always making sure that she knew just how much he loved her. Shifting my attention to Luke, I smiled. He stood next to my father, one arm wrapped around his leg.

Holding my hand out to my son, I said, "Let's show Daddy and Beth how it's done, little man."

"Okay," he laughed, taking hold of mine.

Hitching up my dress so I wouldn't step on it, I let him take the lead as we walked out into the dance floor. Luke and I fell in step next to Edward and Beth. His tiny hands curved around mine, shifting his feet from side to side. Beth and Luke's laughter carried over the music, their smiles shone brighter than the moon and the stars.

The moment the song was over, they took off running through the crowd around us, finding their places next to our parents again. Edward slipped his arms around my waist, bringing his lips down to the side of my neck. I moaned, pressing my body against his.

"Dance with me," he whispered, his breath tickling my skin.

Without giving me a chance to reply, his slid his hands to my waist, spinning me around to face him. I gasped, dropping my hands onto his chest. Edward pressed his forehead against mine as we started moving our hips. Nothing else mattered in this moment. Not the years I'd found myself locked in a hell that I never thought I'd escape from, or fear I felt when I suddenly found myself free. Edward saved me, even if he'd never see it that way. He was my hero, my prince charming, and I'd never let him go.

Leaning closer, I pressed up on my toes until my lips were just outside his ear. He shivered, his fingers digging into my tender flesh. "Have I ever told you that you're an amazing father?"

"Once or twice," he murmured.

"How do you think Beth and Luke will react to a new baby?" I whispered.

Edward froze for half a second before he pulled back just enough to look me in the eyes, a twinkle in his. "A baby? We're having a new baby?"

With tears building in my eyes, I nodded. Before I could say anything, however, Edward crushed his mouth onto mine, his hands sliding around my body. Holding me against him, he deepened our kiss, our tongues dancing together. We were happy, we were perfect. That's all we knew and all we needed to know.


End file.
